


Past Midnight

by AIMRWV



Category: SHINee
Genre: BDSM, Bottom Choi Minho, Clubbing, College, Friendship, Gay, Gay Bar, M/M, Prostitution, Romance, Self-Harm, Sex Club, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, Strippers & Strip Clubs, Tattoos, Top Lee Taemin, University, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-25
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:21:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 28
Words: 132,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21560023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AIMRWV/pseuds/AIMRWV
Summary: The story about Lee Taemin, a dancer at a gay club and Choi Minho, a burned out law student.Be prepared for complicated feelings and a slow development of their relationship.Nothing in life comes easy.
Relationships: Choi Minho/Lee Taemin, Kim Kibum | Key/Lee Jinki | Onew
Comments: 71
Kudos: 92





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> A/N  
> I am really back with another story and this is the first short bit of it. Wordcount: 1173
> 
> This story is cross posted on AsianFanfics.com and I was very unhappy with it. Therefore I am completely working over it as I am posting the chapters here on AO3. I will only be able to write the last chapters when the rest of the story is good enough.
> 
> I hope you will stay on bord! And please leave your thoughts in the comment section that would mean the world to me <3 thank you!!!
> 
> R

Taemin was brushing his long hair backwards, getting ready for tonight’s performance. He was still waiting for Kibum who was supposed to get the results of his university entrance exam today. But the other had not turned up early, an hour before they were supposed to go on stage, like he usually did. Taemin had to put on his makeup himself for once it wasn’t that he was bad at it, it was just that Kibum was a genius in every way. When it came to makeup brushes, fashion, or serious education. The long-haired male had wondered quite a few times why that highly intelligent of a male was working at a gay club as a dancer but he had never found the guts to ask him, who had started working there two years after him. There was something fishy about the whole situation.

He changed into the clothes normally worn for his performances, which were black shorts and a wine colored see through shirt that was basically made out of some strips of fabric and let his body, especially his tattoos, show whenever he moved just the slightest bit. He looked at himself in the full body mirror in the other corner of the room, watching the thin fabric move around his body. He looked stunning, but that was his job, to look good so other men could enjoy themselves.

His eyes stared at his long hair that was pulled back with pins on the side, the long fringe almost hiding his eyes which were staring back at themselves. The dark orbs were surrounded by wine colored eyeshadow and thick black eyeliner which made them look even bigger than they already were. He had on lipstick in the color of his shirt, his lips forming a straight line while he was looking at himself.

On the left side of his neck his cross tattoo showed, which was made out of two simple lines. Two lines without any ornaments or anything else, two simple thin lines that formed a cross whose vertical line stopped at his collarbone. The shirt he was wearing barely left anything to the imagination. The strips of fabric were flowing around his built but still slender body. The body of a dancer. There was another tattoo, a flying owl on his right rib cage right under his nipple, to where it looked like the bird was circling the soft bud. Through the fabric on his arms the third one, a tribal tattoo on his upper arm, shimmered through. Strangely enough the arms were the only part of his body really covered by the shirt.

His eyes followed the strips of fabric further down to the shorts he was wearing. They started a little too low for his taste and ended at the upper half of his thighs. They left nothing left to imagination either, but other than the 'shirt', this was necessary for the dancer as fabric would not give him enough hold on the pole, he was supposed to climb in about 15 minutes. His legs were naturally long and thin, but from years of training they have become toned, muscles showing in several places.

A sigh left Taemin’s throat, where was Kibum? There was almost no time left to get ready. Right at that moment, the raven-haired male entered the dressing room the two of them shared. He was out of breath but had a smile all over his face.

“LEE TAEMIN I MADE IT IN!” he was screaming and instantly Taemin’s lips formed a smile and he went over to hug the almost crying male.

“I actually made it. Scholarship baby.” He sang the second part and turned around on his heels, throwing his arms in the air.

Taemin did nothing but watch his friend basically lose his shit while he was smiling gently at him. He knew how much this meant to Kibum.

“I'm sorry Tae, I haven't had the chance to get excited about it yet.” The happy male was still smiling like an idiot, making Taemin laugh.

“It's all good Kim, I know how much this means to you. But uhm… we are almost on; I think you should change.” Taemin said, pointing at the red clock over by the door.

“Holy fucking crap! WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME EARLIER!” The smile from Kibums face vanished and he started pulling himself together, undressing as fast as possible while at the same time trying to pull his hair back.

“Let me help you.” Taemin said, going over to the struggling male, getting some gel to put the other’s hair back while Kibum changed into the tight shorts and the black net shirt he was supposed to wear. They were almost done with everything but the makeup when another figure entered the room.

“Boys you are on soon. What the heck Kibum, why are you not ready yet?” The small but very built male said.

“Sorry Jjong I had some stuff going on, we’ll be ready in 5! I promise” Kibum threw his most beautiful smile at Jonghyun who instantly smiled back at him.

“Alright I’ll see you guys later.” Jonghyun then left the room and the two dancers applied make-up on Kibum’s face as fast as they could.

“Jjong? What is it with you two, by the way?” Taemin wondered, of course noticing the way Kibum and his boss were looking at each other.

“Ah shut up and let me do my make-up.” Kibum said with one eye closed, trying to get a nice eyeliner done, in which he of course succeeded.

“Not much, I would call it friends with benefits, he seems to have taken a liking to me” He told Taemin anyways.

“And he is not the most unattractive guy in the world, you know? Plus, he is really good in bed”

“Yes of course he is, he is the owner of a fucking gay club my friend.” Taemin said while gesturing for the other male to finally get up since they had to be on stage in a minute.

The two dancers made their way behind the stage and looked at yet another heated up crowd of maybe 100 rich people who were sitting in their leather chairs, drinking alcohol, some with visible bulges from earlier performances, some others which were chatting nervously with other people, excited for the best act of the night.

It was shortly past midnight. It was their time. The two poles were glistening in the dim light as the dancers walked on stage, the chatting calming down instantly, getting replaced by whistles and shouts when they took their positions, one leg around the poles, their backs arched back, necks bent so the world was upside down.

The music started and the spotlights turned on, whitening the vision of the two graceful dancers who took their last deep breaths.


	2. Are You Waiting For Me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here is the first real chapter and you have been introduced to the remaining two important characters of the story. It is still kind of a mess... Wordcount: 2754
> 
> Please leave your impressions in the comments. <3 it makes me happy to hear from you ^^

It was shortly after 10PM and Minho was still sitting in the library to prepare for the big exams that were coming up next week, the last week before the start of the new semester. He hated it, with every single bone of his body. The only reason why he was still at university preparing to be a lawyer was his grandparents, who basically forced him to finish his studies.

There used to be a time when he actually enjoyed it, but that was over two years ago. Before the accident. After the day his parents and his younger sister were in that car accident everything changed. From one day to the next his whole world had turned upside down. Back then, his sister was just about to finish high school and he had just started his law studies at one of the best universities in Korea. His life had been fine, great even.

He was studying at the library when he got the call. The only thing he remembered of that day was that the weather was beautiful. People were playing in the park, students were sitting outside the buildings, chatting, and some eating ordered chicken. All he could do was run out of the building, leaving everything where it was. He ran past everyone who's lives were going so well. Laughing people. Smiling people. Hugging people.

Minho could not hold back his tears, his vision was blurry and every laugh he heard was like a punch in the face. Why him.

In the backseat of the taxi the tall male continued crying. He was unable to grasp the situation he was in, but his sub-consciousness knew - and made the tears flow. When the car finally stopped in front of the hospital he rushed outside, not bothering to pay the driver who was running after him. But he was way faster than the middle-aged man. Adrenalin pumping through his veins.

The next month was torture. He had to take care of everything that was left behind by his parents. His grandparents moved back to Seoul as they had been living in one of their properties in Busan. Even though they had hired many different people to help with what had to be done, Minho was the only heir to everything they had possessed which included a shit ton of stocks to several big companies.

The personal belongings were the worst. Minho spent days in their old house looking through old stuff deciding what to keep and what to throw away.

He never quite got over the death of his family. But who would?

Ever since that day, he has lived with his way too wealthy grandparents who owned a real estate business that was doing better than ever. They had several properties in the country and were currently living in one in Gangnam because of Minho’s education, which they wanted him to finish. They did not let him get his own apartment because they thought he was "out of control".

There was only one more year until he got his bachelor’s degree. He would be out of that shithole soon. At least, that’s what he told himself.

He stretched his limbs – they were stiff from the hours of studying he had already done. Time to go home. Another evening that was going to be spent with Soju in his room and some porn on his laptop. Not that he could not get girls, but his grandparents would start nagging again when he went out more than five times a week and he really was not in the mood for a fight with these grumpy old people, who totally would ruin him if they really wanted to.

When he drove into the garage next to the huge place he was living in, his usual poker face was on again. Just don't let anyone see what you really feel.

He managed to get to his room without meeting either of his grandparents who seemed to be asleep already. But of course, some of the employees saw him on the way, bowed almost 90 degrees while Minho simply ignored them and walked straight to his room on the second floor.

He took of his jacket, hung it where he was supposed to put it and threw himself onto his king-sized bed, which was in the middle of a room that was way too big for a single person to live in.

Minho did not really care about the rest of the room at all. If he was at home, he spent his time in his bed with the laptop on his lap. There was a small refrigerator next to it that held several bottles of expensive wine which he had not touched once. All he needed were the bottles of soju on the bottom. These had to be filled up every third day due to his excessive drinking. He knew he had to keep it down, but life was just too damn hard these days. It was the only way he knew to get through the day.

He opened the laptop and got comfortable for the rest of the night.

On the weekend, he had set a last-minute study date with Jinki, a very loud individual who actually thought he was funny. Despite all his flaws Minho still considered him his closest friend as they had known each other since high school, where Jinki had been his tutor for several classes. That guy, this clumsy and strange human being, was the smartest person Minho knew.

After high school Jinki had to take a year off due to personal issues, which included several suicide attempts - A thing very common in Korean schools. Nevertheless, Minho took that issue very seriously and had spent a lot of time, basically all the time he had left after the insane schoolwork, to visit him in rehabilitation centers and similar institutions.

By the time all the university entrance exams started, Jinki had recovered well enough to sign up for university together with Minho, whom he had grown very fond of during that year. It wasn’t long after, when the accident happened and turned Minho’s life upside down. This time it was Jinki taking care of the younger.

Their friendship was precious to both. Jinki had a hard time watching his friend’s lifestyle change through the death of his family. He could not blame him, this was the worst thing that can happen to someone, but it still hurt to see him like this.

After the accident Minho had lost every good will in life. He did not care about his studies and even less about other people. The only reason why he did not drop out of University was his grandparents, who made it impossible to even take a break. Minho didn’t stay with them because of money, he had enough of that, but his grandparents were scary people and would make his life hell if he made them angry in any way.

Jinki had only met them a few times but he was sure that they could send people after Minho if he decided to drop out and flee. They had their hands in a lot of dirty businesses and therefore had the money and the means to hire people he didn’t want to meet.

So, Minho did as he was told and kept studying. But that was the only thing that was left from the old Minho who had wanted to become a lawyer so badly. Other than that, he was a different person.

The guy who used to do sports competitively was now only seen at the gym to keep his beautiful toned body to get the girls. His lungs would not be able to let him do sports like he used to. Minho had started smoking soon after he started going out on weekends mostly to go clubbing. Cigarettes were not the only thing smoked as Minho got bored of them fast enough and regularly consumed pot, much to the older’s dislike.

Jinki had successfully kept him from harder drugs as he usually went along when Minho went out. He felt the need to look after the younger male, to keep an eye on him so he wouldn’t do anything that endangered his life – he knew about that well enough.

Not that Jinki really enjoyed following the other around – he was not much of a clubbing person. He was also secretly gay, so, unlike Minho, he could not find pleasure in any of the girls that came his way. Something the taller could not understand as Jinki had kept his sexuality to himself. He would not bother talking about it until he was actually in a relationship.

As always, Jinki was early and had been waiting for Minho for a good 15 minutes before he decided to go inside and text the younger where he was seated.A while later Minho made his way to the place where Jinki had saved him a seat in the back of the library, which was packed with students studying for the coming exams.

After just an hour of studying Minho had already had enough of it.

“Yah Jinki are you in for tonight?” He whispered

“Choi Shut up and do what you have to. We can do that when the exams are over.” Jinki whispered back, slightly annoyed

“Ah c'mon don’t be such a nerd."

“Unlike you, I don’t have anyone backing me up with money, I care about this so shut the fuck up or leave.” Minho was quiet instantly, he was not used to being treated like this by the older male, who was usually the nicest person on earth.

Jinki sighed, “Just get a grip. I promise I’ll come along as soon as everything is over.”

Minho just frowned, not very happy with Jinki’s answer.

“Alright but let’s just go somewhere else next time. Not the usual, make it more exciting.”

“AHHHH for god’s sake Choi Minho,” Jinki, who had already gone back to reading, said. “If that makes you happy, I don’t care. Do what you want. I’ll be there."

That was good enough and the rest of the weekend was spent, much to Jinki’s pleasure, studying - by both of them.

The exams were finished by the next Thursday and Minho was waiting for his friend at the entrance of the campus. Slightly annoyed because the other was running late, Minho was disturbed by the sound of a nearing motorcycle, which made him jump aside to not get run over by the crazy person.

To Minho’s surprise the motorcycle came to a stop by the side of the gate, the opposite of where he stood, waiting for Jinki. The driver got off and removed the helmet in the most attractive way Minho had ever seen a girl remove a helmet.

Long, reddish hair had been hidden by the black helmet and the girl shook her head, making the hair move from side to side.

Her whole body was very athletic, almost male but nevertheless Minho felt himself immediately attracted to the woman in the big jeans jacket and the black ripped pants.

Minho watched every single move the woman made. She turned around; head hung so low that the bangs covered most of her face - much to Minho’s disappointment. Her hand took out a pack of cigarettes which were stored in an inside pocket of the jacket.

Minho watched as she lit up a cigarette while it was already between her lips, covering it with one hand because there was a slight breeze around.

From all the staring, Minho hadn't noticed Jinki come out, walk over and stand next to him for a while- Jinki was slightly amused by the fact that Minho – THE Choi Minho was actually staring at someone.

“Uhm Choi?” He then decided to wake the tall male after a while.

“OH HECK JINKI!” Minho almost jumped when the older had gotten him out of his trance. By now the girl was leaning against the motorcycle, smoking the cigarette slowly while typing on an old phone. “DON’T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!”

“I didn't scare you; you were just too absorbed in staring to notice me.” Jinki chuckled “You looked like you wanted to go over any second so I thought I would wait – BUT you didn't do squat – so...” he whispered something that sounded like “for once” and Minho hit his best friend’s arm.

“Ouch, no need to hit me because of that, only telling the truth here.”

“I’ll show you the truth.” Minho said, making himself a bit taller and then walked over to the other side of the gate while Jinki just watched amusedly how the younger was walking towards his destruction.

Jinki still wondered if Minho really thought the person standing over there was a girl.

Of course, it was a very feminine male - but it was most definitely a man. He could see that clear enough to be sure. It might sound cliché, but he had that kind of radar which could identify gay men immediately. And that was one. He decided not to tell Minho because it would be fun to see the other man struggle for once in a situation like this, when he found out the gender of the person in front of him.

Minho then unknowingly started hitting on the guy next to the motorcycle.

“Are you waiting for me?” The taller said charmingly, waiting for the girl to react – as he usually got with his looks.

Taemin had just sent a message to Kibum when he noticed the guy from the other side of the gate walking over to him. Couldn’t he have even one moment of rest? He really didn’t ask for much.

“Are you waiting for me?” The male said and Taemin sighed – another one of these.

The long-haired male did not even look up but kept smoking his cigarette, hoping the guy would get the message and leave him alone. Today less than ever, was he in the mood to talk to anyone except Kibum.

Last night had been tough, if Kibum wouldn’t have turned up with help he could have ended up selling his body for money, and he had promised himself not to ever do that again. That was why, this morning, he had woken up with a big headache due to the sheer amount of Soju he had to drink to be able to sleep.

“Hello?! can you not ignore someone when they're talking to you?” the tall male did not give up so easily. Another sigh left Taemin’s throat.

“Just leave me alone, I am having a bad day already.”

“Common it can't be that bad, and if it really is, I can always try to make it better.” The taller male smirked down at him and that was the moment he had enough of it.

“Can you just fuck off dude, I am really not in the mood to talk to anyone.” Taemin exploded

“Sweety you look dashing when you are mad.” another smirk. But before Taemin could hit the guy another person joined the scene.

“He said to leave him the fuck alone.” Kibum walked right between them, putting his arm around Taemin’s shoulder while glaring at the tall man.

“He?” The latter said, mostly to himself but neither Taemin nor Kibum noticed

“Get your helmet.” Taemin said, looking at Kibum, then throwing his halfway finished cigarette on the floor and stepping on it.

“Sure thing, and you should go over to that friend of yours. It seems as if he is having the time of his life watching you make a fool of yourself.” Kibum said, while walking to the other side of the motorcycle and getting the helmet out of the seat.

Minho could not help but just stand there, dumbstruck by the fact that he just hit on a dude - his worst nightmare - and Jinki had watched him.

Kibum got on behind Taemin and turned around one last time to throw some life advice at the frog-eyed male.

“Oh, and tall guy: maybe learn that no is a no.” The tall man just blinked at the scene in front of him and Kibum had to hold back a smirk at his reaction. This guy hasn't been rejected a lot.

Taemin started the motor and Kibum closed his arms around the other’s built torso, but before he turned back around, to face forward, just for a split second, his eyes met those of a very handsome male on the other side of the gate.


	3. Expensive Alkohol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N  
> this chapter is pretty Jinki focused, It'll be 2min after this SORRYYYY... But I mean we all love Jinki, right? Plus this is really long. you still get quite the idea this chapter I think.... oh well. I'll shut up and let you read now.  
> Please leave a comment if you enjoy what you are reading <3<3  
> xx  
> r

It was Friday evening and Taemin was getting ready for his weekly solo performance. Jonghyun had given him the chance to perform as a solo dancer which was rather rare. Just for him, he had a flying pole installed. Back then when Jonghyun had first introduced him to it, Taemin had been very afraid and excited at the same time. It was a whole different thing when the pole was not fixed at the bottom.

With time and training he managed to get higher and higher, in the end rarely even touching the floor. It was an artistic performance, less sexual than the others the club had. But nevertheless this was one of Jonghyun’s best investments. On Friday evenings the club was full. When the word of the amazing long-haired dancer spread in the gay community of Seoul, men started coming in more and more, some even several times a week.

Jonghyun had hit the jackpot with him. And by now, the once small club has expanded quite a bit and had gotten a reputation for the amazing dancers which were working there.

As opposed to the regular performances, Taemin did not wear a shirt on Fridays. All he wore were his black skinny pants – leaving a beautiful view of his built, inked torso. At the moment, Kibum was performing with two other dancers before it would be time for Taemin to go on stage. The long-haired male already had all of his makeup on and was sitting on the black chair in front of the mirror, eyes closed, focusing on the choreography he had rehearsed since last week.

“Taemin you are on in a few minutes” Jonghyun came inside of the dressing room – Taemin was impressed that he had managed to walk away from Kibum’s performance to get him.

Taemin opened his eyes and looked at himself one last time. “Alright, be right there” he said, getting up gracefully, his long hair flowing over his shoulders.

He followed his boss backstage, where the smaller male kept watching the end of the performance that was currently going on.

As soon as the music stopped, loud cheering and whistles filled the club, the men aroused from what they had just seen and excited for what was going to come. The three half naked men walked off the stage after collecting the tips which were all over the stage. Leaving the men they had gotten from the audience sitting on their chairs on the stage to be taken off stage by other workers.

Kibum was the last to walk away after he whispered something in his chosen man's ear, before coming backstage, smiling at Taemin as a way of wishing him good luck. The feline male looked fabulous in his black harness and the white pants. His hair was styled up beautifully, slightly messy now after the performance, which only made him look more attractive. His eyes were surrounded by black eyeliner and in his ears his silver piercings were glistening in the dim light.

Sometimes Taemin wished he could look like Kibum, in his eyes the other was pretty much the perfect man.

After a loving high five, Taemin walked on stage, the audience going crazy. Some workers just finished installing the pole and the long-haired male took his position in front of it. A few more breaths and the music started playing.

Taemin never really payed attention to the audience as it usually consisted of horny men anyway. Among these today there was one straight male, asking himself what he was doing in a gay club.

Earlier that evening, Minho and Jinki were making their way to Hongdae as the older had promised to accompany him to a new place today. Usually they just visited the same three or four clubs and Suljibs (Sul = alcohol Jib = house, so basically a bar even though slightly different). But Minho said he needed something new, so they were standing at the subway exit, not quite knowing where to go.

“Let’s walk this way” Minho said, pulling the older with him.

“Hmmm SulJib. We need a Suljib first. I need some alcohol” Jinki just sighted already regretting coming with the tall man. Like every week. He didn’t know why he expected the younger to change… but every time they went out Jinki hoped that the other would come to his senses and realise that there are more important things than just getting wasted and getting into bed with some random girl he could not even remember the name of.

A few minutes later they arrived at a place with quite the line in front of it, Jinki had almost walked past – no way in hell that he would wait so long just to get into a fucking SulJib. But Minho stopped in his tracks.

“This looks like it is a good place. This many people cannot be wrong.” The younger said, pointing at the fake Victorian-style building.

“Are you kidding me Choi? It’ll take at least an hour to get in there. Just to get some alcohol? Common.”

“I am so fucking serious you have no idea. Plus, you promised. So here we go.” Minho said.

“You are a fucking child.” Jinki gave back.

Almost 50 minutes later they were finally let inside. Much to Jinki’s surprise it was not as big as he had expected – this was probably the reason behind the long line. There was a grand bar, which was completely round, giving 360-degree access to the alcohol they were selling. Everywhere around there were bigger and smaller tables. To one of them by the side they were accompanied by a worker. The table was already mostly full, but it wasn’t unusual to share tables with other people in a bar as popular as this one.

Very much to Minho’s disappointment there was not a single female at the table the worker showed them to. When Jinki saw the men already seated at the table, there were five of them, his heart skipped a beat; his radar picked up homosexual vibes instantly – and the guy on the far-left side, right next to a free seat, was incredibly attractive. This was going to be a long night.

When the two of them sat down, Jinki next to the attractive guy of course, and had ordered themselves some drinks Minho started talking. The older male though did not pay attention to what came out of his friend’s mouth at all. He was busy secretly throwing looks to his left side.

A few drinks later Minho was already pretty drunk – he had ordered about twice the amount Jinki did and drank it too fast.

Minho watched as his best friend was talking to the short haired male that had probably just been released from the military. Strangely enough, he believed he saw Jinki’s hand on the stranger’s thigh. But he blamed it on the alcohol, the two of them were just happily conversing.

After some time, Minho felt left out – even more now that the two across the table seemed to be getting along a little too well for his liking.

“YAH Jinki” he shouted across the table, making the other jump and spill his drink all over the other male’s pants.

“Oh my god I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that” Jinki immediately started apologizing to the other man.

“You could help me clean up” The stranger said, too softly for Minho to hear but loud enough to make Jinki blush and nod.

“Yah Choi” Jinki looked over to his best friend who seemed to be slightly annoyed not to be part of the conversation. “We’ll be right back. Wait for me, I promise we’ll leave soon” The older said in a haste, taking the stranger’s hand, pulling the tall man – only now he realized how massive this guy was – towards the bathroom.

Minho could not but stay seated. The scene did get him some attention from the other men at the table though and they started talking, them ordering some more alcohol for everyone to drink while the other two were cleaning up. As opposed to the four men at the table, Minho was the only one who did not quite know the meaning of cleaning up.

Jinki and the stranger made their way to the bathrooms which were highly crowded for both genders. By now it was the tall guy leading the way, pulling Jinki after himself, walking past drunk people until they got to one of the bathroom stalls.

“Your friend doesn’t know you’re gay, does he?” The tall male asked and Jinki nodded.

“Not really and I don’t think he could get used to the idea of being friends with me anymore if I told him, so let’s make this quick” Jinki smirked. “I am Jinki by the way”

“Nice to meet you. I am Sangyeon.” The other smirked down at him. They were pressed against each other because of the small size of the bathroom stall, Jinki’s face buried in Sangyeon’s chest, making him feel incredibly small.

“So, now that we at least know each other’s names, can we get to what we are here for?” Sangyeon said, bringing down his hand to his private part which was pressed against Jinki’s navel.

“Hell yes” Jinki said, squating down in the small space provided, now facing the other’s crotch, excited for what was going to come. The floor was dirty, so he tried to keep his knees off the ground as good as he could – not that he cared much anymore.

“Good boy” Sangyeon said, ruffling the smaller’s hair, pressing his face onto his flaccid, clothed dick in the process.

Jinki opened the zipper in a haste, they did not have a lot of time until Minho would get suspicious and look for them. He did not know how to explain if the two of them came out of a stall together. He did not even bother pulling down the other’s pants or boxers but just got the still flaccid dick out of the clothing with one hand while he used the other one to hold onto the tall man’s behind.

When Sangyeon’s dick met with the air in the stall he sighed slightly as if he had waited for this moment for hours, which, maybe he had.

Jinki did not waste a second but started stroking the soft organ with one hand, sometimes placing kisses on it or even licking the hot skin as soon as it was out.

Sangyeon watched as the gorgeous male beneath him caressed his penis lovingly, something no one has ever done before. A smile formed on his lips as he started to harden at the gentle touches Jinki was giving him.

The more erect the tall male was the more courageous Jinki got, now taking the tip of the beautifully curved dick in his mouth, giving lazy pumps to the rest of it. Sangyeon’s breathing had become slightly erratic constantly imagining how it would feel like to bury his whole cock inside Jinki’s throat. But the tall male was trying to hold back as he wondered what the shorter man had planned for him.

“You are so” Sangyeon whispered, a little out of breath “Wonderful”

This made Jinki look up at the lust driven man who looked even better now with his sharp features and the heavy-lidded eyes which were focused on nothing other than his face, lips slightly open.

“This is nothing to be said to a hook-up like me.” Jinki said, his heart racing. This was not what he had expected of this night. To keep the other from replying to what he had just said he engulfed all of the beautiful cock in his mouth, the tip hitting the back of his throat.

He tried very hard not to gag and concentrated on breathing through his nose, keeping the hard flesh where it was.

The moment Jinki had gone down on him, Sangyeon threw his head back in a silent moan, trying his best to keep quiet as they were still in public.

Satisfied with his reaction, Jinki started licking the underside of the hot organ in his mouth, feeling the veiny skin with his tongue. He would have never admitted it, but he actually enjoyed the taste and smell this man was giving off.

Sangyeon could not keep himself from moving his hips anymore, he started moving inside Jinki’s mouth in small shallow thrusts. The latter was simply hollowing his cheeks, trying to make this as pleasurable as possible. His hands were on Sangyeon’s hips, slowing down the taller’s movements when he was close to gagging but also keeping himself from losing balance and landing on the floor.

Soon the thrusts got faster and Jinki’s hair was gripped by the tall man’s hand, holding the shorter male in position.

“I am going to come” Sangyeon whispered, bent forwards in pleasure, trying to get those words to Jinki’s ears.

Unable to speak, Jinki just nodded and got off the erection as fast as he could – catching any STDs wasn’t planned for tonight. As if he had held back his orgasm, Sangyeon exploded right at that moment, hot white semen ejaculating from his erection.

Jinki could see Sangyeon’s member twitching through heavy lidded eyes as he felt hot cum landing on his face while the tall man jerked himself off until his balls were empty.

Few moments after, Sangyeon used Jinki’s face to clean the crown of his dick, smearing the leftover cum on his cheek. While Sangyeon put his softening dick back into his pants, pulling up the zipper, Jinki got up, facing the taller male again.

“You have something here” Sangyeon smirked, brushing away a string of his cum with his thumb. Jinki’s lips formed a smile, looking up at the tall man. It had been a while since he had this much fun with a stranger. Wait no, he was pretty sure he had never had this much fun with a stranger, ever.

Before leaving the bathroom, Sangyeon helped the smaller to clean his face and the two of them fixed their hair and clothes, then walked back to where their friends were seated. To Jinki’s surprise, Minho was actually talking to the other guys and was not using his phone.

Minho was the last one to notice the two and therefore also missed the looks Sangyeon got from his friends which he reacted to with a sly smirk.

“There you are. FINALLY!” Minho said, already getting up from his seat, ready to leave for a club. He seemed to be quite drunk already as he had to hold himself up, one hand on the table for a second until he found his balance again.

Jinki looked up at Sangyeon who just lifted an eyebrow. “you really think going alone with him is a good idea” The tall male asked, making Jinki shrug.

“Not as if I haven’t done that before…” Jinki sighed

“Would you like to come along with us?” “Couldn’t we come with you guys?” The two of them said simultaneously, making the whole table laugh.

“Sure you can!” Sangyeon said with a look to his friends.

Jinki and Minho left first because the younger was already walking towards the door. Jinki shortly promised Sangyeon they would wait for them outside the SulJib.

“Why did that take so long hyung” Minho asked with a confused look on his face, alcohol made him behave at least 5 years younger than he actually was.

“Oh nothing…” Jinki struggled “We just had troubles finding the bathroom” He lied, and Minho just nodded as if it was the most logical thing in the world.

“Can we leave now please; we still need to find a good club. Why are we standing out here anyway?”

“We are waiting for the other guys, they said they know a good place to go and didn’t you want to go somewhere new? Apparently, it is an insider tip. So, I thought it could not hurt to go.” Jinki said, glancing over at the door.

“OHHH Hyung! Did I already tell you how awesome you are?” Minho said, hugging the older male happily.

“Yes yes, you can thank me later by not passing out today.” Jinki said right when Sangyeon and his friends stepped outside and joined them.

“Alright let’s go!” Sangyeon said “I am sure you’ll like it. Friday evenings are the best, they have special performances today.” With a look at his watch, he told everyone that the great show will start in about an hour so they should hurry up to get seats.

Turns out, one in the group of Sangyeon’s friends knew the owner of the club who came outside after he called him and got them into the club for free through a backdoor. The small male introduced himself as Kim Jonghyun and despite his height, he was pretty intimidating.

When they made it to the seats Kim Jonghyun showed them to, leather sofas that looked just as expensive as the rest of the interior, Minho’s eyes went bigger.

“Where the fuck ARE we Jinki” Minho said while trying to take everything in.

There were so many people around. And to Minho’s disappointment the audience was lacking even a single woman. Everywhere they looked were men, most of them aged 25 to 40.

“I don’t like this place.” The younger said but it was already too late. They were seated by the side of a massive stage and were served some fancy drinks for free - in glasses which seemed to be five times too big for the little liquid it held.

Minho did not enjoy this place as much as Jinki seemed to. He watched the older male talking to the tall guy he had disappeared with earlier, happily sipping at the drink the waiter had brought. But before he could complain and get them out of there, the lights started to go out and Minho decided to give this “Amazing show” a chance. It was not as if he had payed anything to get in here.

So, Minho grabbed his drink and was surprised by the intense flavour it had. “Expensive alcohol” he mumbled. Maybe this evening wasn’t going to be so bad after all.

He took that back as soon as the performers entered the stage. THEY WERE ALL MALE. Minho looked over at Jinki who looked like he was excited to see these men dance. Was he gay? Was this a gay club? It could not be. No. He, THE Choi Minho was not in a gay club. It could not be.

But it would explain why there were no women around and male dancers on stage.

The music started and the three men in white pants and white dress shirts started dancing on the chairs which were placed on the stage.

He wanted to get out of here. He didn’t want to be here. But in an unfamiliar way these dancers fascinated him. He had never seen men dance sensually – at least he had never given them any attention. But these men knew how to make use of their bodies. Minho could hardly take his eyes off them. Especially the raven haired one in the middle who looked vaguely familiar.

Minho shook his head. No, he could not be familiar with a dancer at a gay club.

By the ending of the first song, the dancers had gotten rid of their shirts, their toned bodies now almost completely on display. In contrast to the other two dancers, the raven-haired one in the middle wore a leather harness beneath the dress shirt, making a wonderful contrast between his milky skin and the black leather strips. They walked off the stage on the side where Minho and the others were seated, going into the crowd to find themselves a partner for the next performance.

When they came closer, he was able to take a better look at the raven-haired male who surprisingly stopped right in front of Jinki. Despite the heavy makeup the dancer was wearing Minho realised why he had been familiar, that was the guy he had met yesterday at the gate of their university. But what the hell was he doing here? Minho watched wide eyed when the dancer offered Jinki a hand, even more surprised when Jinki actually took it. He saw a completely new side of Jinki tonight. The man who usually just sat at the bar on the side in all the clubs they had gone to, was walking up on the big stage, surrounded by male dancers and did not look displeased at all.

Jinki smiled at the raven-haired male when the dancer offered him his hand. No way in hell was he going to let this opportunity slip through his hands. He had long forgotten about his very hetero friend who sat next to him. The dancer’s eyes were fixed on his and he had never been as excited for anything as he was now. Jinki did not even bother to look back at where Minho and Sangyeon were seated but just followed the half-naked male on stage, where the lights were blinding.

He could hardly see anything. All he saw was the male who had pushed him on one of the chairs and was now standing right in front of him, moving his hips to the beat playing from the speakers, his ass swinging in front of his face. The male turned around right in the moment when Jinki’s hand touched the other’s hip. The look he got from the raven-haired male clearly told him: No touching. It took all of Jinki’s self-control to pull away his hands, placing them on the side of the chair.

By now Jinki only had eyes for the dancer’s beautiful body that was moving about an arm’s length in front of him. The raven-haired male’s hands were all over his own body, covering his private part while thrusting for the audience who was cheering loudly throughout the performance. When the beat of the music changed, the dancer came closer, turning around to look at Jinki who was sitting in that chair, unable to move.

Out of nowhere the dancer pulled a black strap of fabric, taking Jinki’s hands and tying them together in a tight knot, but still loose enough for Jinki to be able to get blood into his fingers. That man definitely knew what he was doing.

The dancer pulled up Jinki’s arms by the other end of the fabric, moving his hips back and forward, making Jinki gulp down the saliva that had formed in his mouth. He bent forwards; his naked chest so close to the sitting male’s face the latter could easily make out the slightly bigger pores on the raven’s perky nipples.

Jinki had spread his legs for the dancer to get better access to his body, which seemed to be part of the choreography as the other two dancers were standing between their victims as well.

The beautiful man’s eyes did not leave Jinki’s anymore, they were staring right back at each other even while the raven haired male used his free hand to move down Jinki’s chest until it reached dangerous waters. Happy with what he found there, the dancer started thrusting against Jinki’s crotch, smirking when the sitting male’s eyes moved down to where their crotches had met.

All the dancer’s movements were incredibly smooth, going straight to Jinki’s manhood, where his member slowly started to wake.

By the time the song ended, and the dancer stopped his performance, he was already semi hard. The raven-haired male turned around, facing Jinki one last time.

“Call me Key” he smirked, touching the other’s cheek while taking off the fabric on Jinki’s wrists.

Without another word or even a look, the dancer walked off the stage together with the other two, Jinki just saw how the dancer high-fived someone backstage and then he was already guided off the stage by one of the workers.

His legs were wobbly, and he tried his best to hide his pretty obvious boner.

Throughout the whole show, Minho had followed the happenings on stage closely. Several times he was close to leaving. But strangely enough he was fascinated by the way these dancers were moving. And one time he even caught himself wanting to be in Jinki’s position.

The show was over, and things started to get busy on stage. A few workers started installing a black pole in the middle of the stage. And as soon as they left the stage a man stepped up, only wearing tight black pants, his long hair reaching almost to his nipples. The next thing Minho set his eyes on was the tattoo of a flying owl on his ribcage. Minho was staring at this dancer’s body. He was built very well, all his muscles showing, but at the same time he was elegant, incredibly gracious how he walked to the middle of the stage where he was waiting for the music to start.

Minho was unable to take his eyes off that man for even one second. Something about this dancer affected him in ways he had never imagined a man to affect him.

When the music started and the dancer lifted his head, taking a step back to grab the pole with one hand it hit him: this was the guy from yesterday. The one he had hit on because he thought he was a girl.

And now that guy was standing there on a stage of a gay club, smirking at the audience, half naked, looking better than every girl Minho had ever hooked up with.

This night was not going the way Minho wanted it to.


	4. Backstage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy the new chapter and leave a comment if you like it ><

Ever since the dancer had lifted his head Minho could hardly take his eyes off him. Jinki who sat next to him again was long forgotten.

The music had just started, and the men filling the club already began whistling just as the dancer’s toned leg wrapped itself around the black pole, which was hovering about 3 inches over the floor, making it move slightly. And then on the first beat, the pole was jacked upwards and the dancer who had his hands tightly gripped around the pole, was pulled up into the air with it.

When it was halfway up, the tight grip opened and he fell backwards, now only holding onto the black pole with his right leg, the other one aligned with the dark metal. The dancer’s long hair fell, moving with the male’s choreography. He was hanging upside down, back arched into a beautiful S while the pole started spinning, his hair flowing with the air perfectly matching his movements.

Minho felt himself more than just intrigued by only the first 30 Seconds. He had to get out of there, but self-control was not a word he knew in the current intoxicated state he found himself in.

The dancer bent his back even more, his arms reaching for the pole below his head, grabbing it and then releasing the leg, moving it off the pole slowly. This dancer’s core strength and body-control was incredible, every muscle was tensed as he turned himself around in midair, just holding onto the black pole with two hands.

Climbing further up the pole by just using his hands, Minho watched the muscles under the inked skin work. The dancer was now showing them his back with a thick black line all along his spine which disappeared in his pants. The geometric tattoo somehow split his body in half, making it seem like the two sides of his body were not connected.

He had found his position further up the pole, making all the spectators look up in awe at the incredibly attractive male. By now he had wrapped his legs back around the black metal while positioning his arm differently, so that he could pull up one of his legs into a split while hanging two meters over the floor.

Despite the many position changes, the dancer’s movements were smooth, not breaking off at any point, flowing from one figure into the next while all of his limbs worked together perfectly as they followed the music, making it look effortless.

Minho’s head told him to leave several times, basically every time the dancer made a move too sexual for Minho to imagine being at a circus. That was what he did the remaining time to justify his intense staring.

Every time the dancer’s hand found his crotch, Minho wanted to look away, but was unable to take his eyes off the man. Once again, the long haired male was holding onto the pole with his right hand and leg, moving his other hand along his naked chest to his closed crotch where it rested for a while, gently rubbing his private parts while rolling his body in the air.

The audience’s whistles were almost louder than the music and the dancer was smirking at the men beneath him. Shortly after, his left hand gripped onto the black pole again, his muscles contracting under the fair, sweat coated skin.

Then the music sped up, the dancer following the rhythm, his moves getting faster while the pole was let down again until it stopped shortly before touching the floor. Every single person in the room had their eyes fixed on the tattooed male who was gracefully moved through the air and Minho could not but feel bothered by all the looks the dancer got from the horny men all around them.

It scared him; never had he experienced a feeling like this. But all he wanted to do was carry that man off the stage, not letting any other man ever come near him. The whole place except for the dancer’s moving frame was completely blurry and Minho’s head hurt. He had had too much to drink, obviously. Realizing the thoughts he just had, he shook his head while he got up, determined to leave this place as soon as possible. The fast movement though, made him see black and fall back onto the leather couch, holding his spinning head.

Before Minho could open his eyes again, the audience started whistling and shouting again. The dancer has gotten back on the floor and was now thrusting his hips at the black stage, leaving nothing to imagination. Of course, the audience went crazy which made the dancer smirk in a way Minho had hoped never to see on a male’s face. It clearly provoked the horny men all around him because people started throwing money on stage.

The song slowed down and with a few more beats the performance was over and the half-naked dancer bowed to the audience, collecting the money on the floor and then leaving the stage in a fast but controlled pace.

Minho’s head was still spinning. The loud music, the alcohol and the performance left him completely spent. He did not even realize when Jinki got up and walked away after saying something he did not hear anyway. Sangyeon and his friends had gotten up as well, walking over to the bar where they met some other people they know.

Minho did not move for a while to get his head to stop spinning, that was until he felt a hand on his back, making him turn around only to look into Sangyeon’s dark eyes.

“Should we take you home? You don’t look too good.” He said, putting a glass of water on the glass table.

“No, I am waiting for uh Jinki” Minho managed to say, tongue heavy from all the alcohol he had consumed this evening.

“I don’t think he will be back too fast.” Sangyeon smirked

Minho was confused, why would Jinki not come back fast?

“Uh why? What I don’t get it he’ll be right back” Minho mumbled.

“I am sorry to break it to you boy, but your friend is gay, very much so and by now he is probably fucking Kibum. So, either you come with us or try to get home by yourself.”

“He is not, and I will wait. Who is Kibum anyway?” Minho answered, reassuring himself he wasn’t friends with a gay man.

“I think it is pretty obvious which one of the dancers was Kibum – and, whatever boy… do as you want.” Sangyeon said, walking away with his friends as the highlight of the night was over.

Minho stayed seated for a while longer and drank the water he had been given so generously. At some point when Jinki didn’t return the thought that Sangyeon might have been right popped up. Did Jinki really go backstage to find that Kibum?

He got up slowly after the world had stopped spinning, making his way to the back of the room where the entrance to the backstage area seemed to be. Standing there, was a really tall guy, taller than Minho, almost as tall as Sangyeon, just that this man was not only tall but also muscle packed.

“Are you here for a private dance?” the man asked in a deep voice. Minho just nodded, hoping that would get him backstage.

“Alright so when you get in, turn to the left and there you will find a desk where you’ll choose a dancer and then pay the fee to get further instructions. Have fun” With these words, the massive figure opened the door and Minho was granted the way backstage.

As soon as the door was closed, almost none of the music that was playing inside the main room was still hearable. Instead of following the directions the doorman had given him he started wandering around, looking for a sign of Jinki. This night had not gone the way he wanted it to so all he wished for now was to go home.

He opened a door on one side of the long hallway, only to be greeted by nothing but darkness. Nothing in there. After he had closed the door, he walked to the next one opening it.

There was most definitely light in this one. That light shone onto a half-naked man who was moving his hips on another man’s crotch. Both of them looked up instantly when Minho had opened the door looking at the intruder with an angry face.

“Sorry” Minho mumbled, bowed and closed the door afterwards.

The next door he opened seemed to be the dressing room of the dancers. Some of the men he had seen on stage earlier were sitting around, smoking what didn’t seem to be only cigarettes while chatting happily.

“Chmmm mmh” Minho cleared his throat to get their attention “I am looking for my friend, he was uuhm on stage earlier.” Minho tried to describe Jinki in a way that these people knew who he was looking for. “The one on the chair in the middle and the Ki-something dude dancer was with him…” even though it was nowhere near a correct sentence the dancers seemed to understand who he meant.

“Ah the guy with Kibum?” one of them said, smiling at the overly attractive drunk male in the door frame. “You’ll probably have to go home by yourself. I saw Kibum walking off with him earlier.”

Without Minho noticing, most of the dancers had checked him out the second he had opened that door. The dancers looked at each other and before Minho could respond to the new information, he was already offered a spot in the circle on the floor and invited to join them for a smoke.

Knowing nothing he could do other than this while waiting for his friend, he accepted, still confused by the situation he had found himself in. But his mind did not work properly anymore and therefore he was unable to process most of the new information, like his best friend being gay – and the fact that he was about to smoke with dancers of a gay club.

“Is it your first time here?” One of the dancers asked, puffing some smoke in the air, giving the joint to the dancer next to him.

All eyes were on the newbie, waiting for him to answer.

“UH yes I think so, not that I would ever go to a gay club or anything – I mean I am not gay so Yeah, first time – a few dudes took us with them. But if I had known it was a gay club, I mean… I don’t know but, I would have not come I think… what am I even doing here.” While Minho was speaking, the dancers’ faces changed, eyeing the man skeptically.

“You are saying you are not gay?” one of them dared to ask while the other ones were exchanging looks with each other.

Straight guys were rather rare in this club, so if one would turn up, he usually became the challenge of the night. Whoever was able to get a straight guy to sleep with them would definitely make a name for himself. They usually made a challenge out of many things to keep up the spirits.

There was a moment of silence and Minho finally got his hands on the joint which had been traveling the circle. After inhaling deeply, Minho had to cough slightly. This was cheap stuff. He was not used to smoking low quality weed like this. Quickly, he gave the joint to the dancer next to him while he felt the drug enter his system.

He did not notice the looks he got from every single one of the 6 dancers, all of them evaluating their chances with the handsome male.

“Where is Tae by the way, he said he’ll join the game as well.” The dancer to Minho’s left said, looking at his watch.

“I don’t know he should be done changing by now.” Another one said, getting up. “I’ll go and get him. Get the cards ready and explain the rules to the newbie.” And then with a glance to Minho he asked “What is your name by the way?”

“Minho.”

“Uh well then, welcome, Minho!” He smirked at the tall male, turning around graciously as it was to be expected from a dancer.

After that guy had left the room, the others started to explain the game to Minho. It was basically a very easy card game. The goal was to get 31points of them same color (or three of the same number which always gave 30.5 points) and you always had three cards in your hands. But every turn you could exchange either one or all of your cards with the three that were open in the middle of the circle.

If you don’t want to exchange a card anymore you can knock on the floor and everyone is just allowed to change once more until the points are counted. The one with the least points had to take off a piece of clothing the winner of the round could choose.

Competitive like Minho was he was all up for it. That was, until the one dancer finally came back, “Tae” with him. When Minho’s eyes met the ones of the longhaired dancer his body froze, and he wanted nothing but get out of there.

like Minho, the dancer recognized him instantly. 

“You again? What do you want? Are you stalking me?”

Minho just shook his head; he really was not.

“Tae he’s just waiting for his friend who is with Kibum, you know? The one from the stage? Big Buldge?” The long-haired dancer nodded while tying his hair back into a messy ponytail.

“So, we invited him to join us for the game.” Another one said, making “Tae” just slightly nod and taking the free spot on the opposite side to Minho.

The game started and Minho did not even do too badly, only losing his jacket in the first round but after that he had gotten as good at the game as someone could be in his intoxicated state.

Sometimes that Jonghyun guy would come into the room to get one of the dancers who was booked for a private dance. After some time, Minho lost his shirt as well, leaving him and the other 2 dancers who were still left in the room all with naked torsos.

He did not notice the wanting look in the face of the dancer next to him who was glancing over at Minho’s toned body every few minutes. Tae on the other hand just kept on playing, sitting there both his pants and his shirt already off but he didn’t seem to feel uncomfortable at all.

A few minutes later, the short-haired dancer got taken away by Jonghyun which left Minho alone in the room with Taemin. The game they played did not work just with two players so all they did was sit there, looking at each other for a split second before looking away awkwardly, both of their brains running to start a conversation.

Taemin didn’t quite know what to do with himself as he was just as tired as exhausted from today’s performance.

“Will they come and get you too?” Minho then asked Taemin, who just shook his head.

“No, I have my day off today, I am just here for the performance.”

“Ah I see.” Minho said, scratching the side of his head.

“It was very good by the way” The tall male said, looking anywhere but at the long-haired dancer who was by now looking at Minho closely. “The performance I mean”

“Uhm well… thank you?” Taemin said. “I am Taemin” He then introduced himself. Minho hesitated but took the hand, Taemin was holding out for him to take.

“Minho.” He said, looking into the dancer’s eyes.

The moment Minho touched the other male, his heart skipped a beat and he pulled back his hand instantly.

“You straight?” Taemin asked, getting up to grab a water bottle which was standing on the table behind Minho.

“Why do you…” Before Minho could finish, Taemin had come closer which made Minho shut up and moved back, still sitting on the floor.

“Your surprised face in front of the university gate?” the long-haired male questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“The only thing I cannot quite make sense off is why you are at a gay club.” Taemin stated and waited for the taller male to explain it to him.

“I don’t really know either. It just kind of turned out that way. You know this was supposed to be for me, this evening I mean. And now Jinki is having his fun – OMG I still cannot believe he is actually gay – and he just left me here with you.”

“So, you are implying I am no fun then?” the dancer said, smirking at the male beneath him.

“That’s not what I mean”

“Do you have any cash on you?” Taemin asked

“Uhm Yeah I do… why do you need to…” Minho could not finish his sentence before Taemin cut him off: “It is my day off but that does not mean I cannot give you a good time” He smirked again

“What do you- Oh god. No. Never. Ever. Don’t you dare touching me.” Minho said, grabbing his shirt.

“But I am sure you would like it” Taemin said, moving his hands over Minho’s soft skin. He could clearly feel the muscles beneath contract as Minho tried to hold himself back.

Minho had the hardest time keeping himself from touching the dancer’s almost naked body as well. And an even harder time getting away from Taemin’s touch. His intoxicated mind did not send the message of ‘I am not gay’ to Minho’s private part and he felt himself getting aroused just by the idea of having the feline dancer taking all of him.

In a split second he promised himself that this was the first and last time and that no one will ever know of this. Then he let go of his shirt, grabbing the dancer’s arm, pulling him closer and sealing their lips in a passionate kiss.

The kiss was interrupted by Taemin who pulled away, smirking.

“There we go. But I’ll get the pay in advance. And there’s one thing: no penetration, we stick to making out, oral is allowed. You have any questions?” Minho shook his head, getting his money from the back of his pants, handing Taemin a 50’000won bill.

The latter inspected the bill for a second then nodded, getting to work, hating himself for doing this again but the heater in their apartment had stopped working and winter was coming fast. At least Minho was hot. He would be a fool not to take this opportunity.


	5. Pretty Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for self-harm near the end of the chapter!

Minho’s breathing got faster as Taemin closed the gap between their bodies. One of the dancer’s hands was on Minho’s hips, keeping the other in place while he came closer – always looking into the dark orbs of the tall male’s eyes.

“You look like you have seen a ghost” Taemin commented on the wide eyes. “Just pretend I am a girl if it makes you feel better” With those words he took off the hairband which had been holding the long hair back, making it fall onto his naked shoulders while he stood up, looking down at Minho who followed him shortly.

The taller male nodded, his mind cloudy. Only half of his brain was still working, and it definitely was not the one that was able to think about actions.

Minho had a hard time to keep himself from staring at Taemin’s toned body which was decorated with beautiful artwork. As much as he wanted to take in every inch of the other’s tattoos, that strangely fascinated him, he tried his best to refrain from staring at another man’s naked body.

“So how would you like me?” Taemin whispered right next to Minho’s ear, his long hair tickling the tall male’s shoulders. Not only was Minho unable to think about his actions, also was he not in the condition to properly communicate, so everything he was able to utter was something like:

“Uhm I… I don’t want… Just do anything.” The dancer had to laugh slightly at how the other male was stumbling over his words. He was so boozed it was almost cute.

Taemin was more than sure that he was the first man to have his way with the tall student. The way the other male reacted to his lightest touch was re-affirming the information he had gotten from the incident at the gate plus the statement the other had given when he asked him about his sexuality.

He had not been enjoying private dances a lot recently. Usually the people booking one were guys at least over 40 – usually not attractive at all. So, despite hating the fact that he is selling his body again, he caught himself actually looking forward to what was going to come.

“You like dirty talk?” Taemin said, he personally wasn’t much of a fan, but usually this was what got him the most tips.

“Uh” Minho’s voice was rough, he blushed and then nodded slightly. Why was he embarrassed – he was THE playboy at his University. Why was he blushing now? Now out of all the times, now that he was with a fucking dude. Maybe he was blushing BECAUSE it was a man.

“Good” Taemin said, moving his hand from Minho’s hips further back to his firm buttocks, slightly massaging the left one while closing the gap between their lips.

Minho was so close to turning around and leaving the room. He was not gay. He was not gay. It was playing in his head on repeat while his lips started moving against Taemin’s softer ones. But just after he had started to take over control, the dancer harshly bit onto his lower lip, holding him in place painfully which made him moan in pain.

“I am deciding on the pace” Taemin growled lowly through his teeth, not letting go of the taller’s lip until the latter had nodded slightly. Then, he let go of the red flesh but before Minho could lick over the bleeding spot, Taemin did exactly that.

Taemin smirked at Minho’s surprised look and pulled the taller’s lower body closer while his tongue was running along the other’s bleeding lip.

Minho’s mind was overwhelmed by all the sensations he was experiencing. Usually it was him taking control over the girls he made out with. But now it was the other person taking the lead. Confused about the situation he found himself in, the taller tried to take over again but failed miserably when Taemin moved one of his hands along his backside, resting on a hip – only to shortly after moving further down and squeeze one of Minho’s muscular cheeks.

The latter, who had by now closed his eyes and given himself into the kiss completely, almost jumped when he felt Taemin squeezing his ass with more force now. Minho pushed the dancer away from him with one hand and used the other one to get Taemin’s hand off his ass.

“did you already have enough?” the long-haired male said, almost looking a little disappointed. But Minho did not notice and was fighting himself over whether he really could do this. He was not gay. No fucking way. But why was he so aroused by this situation then? It had to be the alcohol and the weed he had smoked earlier.

Minho decided to blame everything on his intoxicated state and right after took a hold on Taemin’s neck to pull the smaller male close, sealing their lips in another heated kiss, but this time it was Minho dominating, getting his tongue inside Taemin’s mouth, hungrily moving it along the other’s.

Taemin was surprised when Minho’s expression changed in one second and the next, they were already back, lost in a passionate kiss. As he did not expect the other male to kiss him again, he lost control of the situation instantly.

Usually, Taemin did not like not being in charge of the situation, it brought back memories from darker periods of his past. But this time, for the first time in a while he did not feel like running away when someone other than him took over.

He was alright for the first few second but then turned the tables around, by moving his hand south, to meet Minho’s clothed crotch. The soft touch of Taemin’s hand made Minho inhale sharply and this way gave Taemin the chance to take over control of the kiss again.

The tall male was struggling in his embrace, not enough for him to break free but strong enough to get Taemin to hold onto his body tighter, while keeping his hand placed on his most private parts.

While having his hand placed on Minho’s clothed manhood, Taemin was able to make out the location and placement of the tall male’s dick. It was not yet completely aroused the dancer noticed. This would be interesting. Usually his partners were horny men that were already completely aroused before he even started doing anything to them.

By now Minho had more or less gotten used to the hand on his crotch – barely noticing it anymore and therefore he had also stopped struggling. This gave Taemin the chance to let go of the other’s body, and to move the second hand to where the first one was still placed on Minho’s clothed manhood.

When he started opening the zipper Minho groaned. “Stop” He said between pants, moving away from Taemin.

Minho could not stand the thought of a man touching his bare private part. It was bad enough that his current state and arousal has made him make out with another man. But this was going too far. He could not allow himself to do this.

“You have already payed for it, but you don’t want any release?” Taemin said, smirking slightly.

“I- Uhm” Minho’s eyes were moving up and down the gorgeous almost naked male in front of him. Nervously he was playing with his fingers. “I am not gay” he said, looking the dancer straight in the eyes.

“I know boy, you have told me several times already.” Taemin threw a look to Minho’s private part “But you are obviously aroused, you have already payed me, so it is only natural that I finish the job, isn’t it?” the sly smirk never left the dancer’s face, knowing exactly that he had the other male in his hands – not only literally.

“I cannot have another man touching my penis” Minho then said, surprising Taemin by his direct way of speaking.

“So, what if I don’t touch it?” The dancer asked, dedicated to satisfying the other male tonight even if it was just for his own pleasure.

Minho took too long to reply, wondering how that was supposed to work, so Taemin decided to take that as a yes, moving back to the others crotch – closing the zipper as Minho wished.

“Good.” Taemin said, bringing his face closer to the hinted bulge in Minho’s pants. He was staring right at it while leaning closer and closer until his nose met the rough fabric of Minho’s jeans.

He gave the clothed member an experimental squeeze with his right hand, massaging the soft organ until it started to get harder beneath his touch. With a short look up to Minho’s face, Taemin was reassured that the other male did not hate this as much as he said because his eyes were closed, and his mouth was hanging open silently showing that he was indeed enjoying himself.

Reassured in his actions, Taemin started moving his hand along the clearly forming bulge faster, creating more friction on Minho’s penis through the rough fabric of the latter’s pants. When this did not get Minho to moan either, Taemin closed the space between his mouth and the other’s private part.

He started licking the fabric with small kitten licks, coating it in saliva to make it stick onto the skin of Minho’s manhood. On his tongue he could feel the slight twitching of Minho’s erection, making him place open-mouthed kissed all-over it, massaging it with his lips.

Soon, Taemin got rougher. He sunk his teeth into the soft, twitching flesh which finally got Minho to moan.

“Holy shit” he almost screamed, voice throaty and followed by heavy breathing that he seemed to have held in for a long time.

But Taemin did not stop at all. This one moan that he got from the tall male went straight into his own manhood which started to wake as well. He kept using his mouth to caress the clothed penis which was by now rock hard and clearly visible through the wet fabric of Minho’s Jeans. It took all of Minho’s self-control, not to bury his hands in Taemin’s long hair.

When Minho began to meet Taemin’s touch, moving his hips up and down to increase the friction between them, Taemin knew that the other male was close. He increased the speed of his hand which was back at work again on the lower half while he kept sucking on the tip of Minho’s hidden penis.

A few more pumps and Minho’s hips jerked up and down, trembling as an orgasm rushed through him, ejaculating semen into his pants. Taemin did not stop sucking on the wet fabric until he tasted some of the semen seeping through.

“Fuck” Minho moaned again, leaning back, completely spent.

The next few moments were slightly awkward, Taemin licked his lips and moved away from Minho’s crotch while Minho himself blushed and instantly moved a hand to the wet spot on his jeans.

“You’re welcome” Taemin said, looking at how the other male was trying to cover himself.

“I want to go home.” Minho uttered, voice still rough from previous actions. “Call me a cab please” he added shortly after.

“I can also drive you home if you want” Taemin said while putting his shirt back on – He was planning to leave anyway and taking Minho would not be much of a burden as he did not mind the thought of Minho’s arms around his body at all. He knew he should not take a liking to anyone in his situation, but he could not deny that Minho was the first man in a while that he had actually enjoyed pleasuring just the slightest bit.

“I want a cab” Minho repeated, trying to get up while holding his hand in place.

“Are you sure you want to get in a cab in your state?” Taemin said with a look to the taller male’s private parts. “And you are coming out of a gay club…” he shrugged his shoulders “This won’t leave a lot to imagination, you know?”

Taemin knew Minho would accept his offer. Being gay seemed to be the worst thing in the other’s eyes. So why not make use of his hatred?

A few minutes later, Taemin had all of his things packed and the two of them left the club through the back door leading onto a small side street which was completely quiet.

“A mototcycle?! Are you serious?” Minho said, his walk not as confident as usual as he had hold himself up on some walls when he was close to falling. With wobbly legs he made his way along the wall while Taemin was getting a helmet out of the seat.

“Yes, a mototcycle, I thought you saw me at the gate?” Taemin said, making no gesture to go and help Minho cross the street.

“I am not riding that.” The tall male said, pointing at the vehicle with a lazy arm, while leaning onto the last wall before he had to give up stability to walk over to where Taemin was waiting for him.

“Well it looks like you have to. Do I look like I can afford a car? No, I don’t, so get over here since I will not call you a taxi.”

“Pretty boy, I will not get on this. I will walk home” Minho said, turning around to leave the dancer behind.

“Pretty boy?” Taemin put the helmet back on the motorcycle and walked towards the taller male. “You, mister, should shut up, stop pretending you are so great. Now fucking follow me, don’t be a pussy.” With these words, he took one of Minho’s hands in his, holding onto the big hand tightly, pulling the stumbling male over to where the motorcycle was standing.

Minho was too surprised to react at all and shortly after, found himself with a helmet on his head on the backseat of a motorcycle, his arms around the dancer’s slender but muscular body while the vibrations of the moving motorcycle made his whole body tremble.

The air was cold and refreshing, clearing his mind at least a little. Even though he had a hard time giving Taemin directions, they had to stop several times for Minho to let Taemin know the way to his home. But the closer they got to where Minho was living, the more suspicious Taemin got.

By now they were in one of the richest parts of Seoul, the part where there were houses that belonged to only one family and not the apartments that you could find everywhere else in the city.

“Next street to the right.” Minho shouted from the back so Taemin would hear him.

The latter did as he was told and a few seconds afterwards Minho instructed him to stop. “We are here”

Taemin let Minho get off first, but followed right after, taking off his helmet as well as Minho’s, putting them both back into the seat of his motorcycle.

After checking out his surroundings, Taemin could not manage to keep quiet. “So, you think I am just going to leave you here? Are you kidding me?” The dancer said, looking at the huge gate which made it impossible to look at what was on the other side of the old stone wall. “Dude it has been a long day, I don't have time for your drunk adventures. We are in fucking Gangbuk, do you really find it necessary to waste my time?"

Minho did not answer anything at all, just walked over to the gate and typed in a combination of numbers which was about three times longer than the four-digit code doors usually had.

When the gate actually opened Taemin could not but look back and forth between the heavily drunk man and the huge house which he could make out behind several trees that framed the gate.

“I will be going in then.” Minho said, coldly, completely ignoring what the dancer had said before, as he believed his actions were answer enough.

He then almost fell down the stairs but successfully kept himself upright by holding onto the wall next to him.

Taemin on the other hand could not quite believe what he was seeing. This rude brat of an incredibly handsome man was living in a place like this?

There went his chances of meeting the other again. He had wanted to give him his card to get him over again, but that plan was cancelled the moment that gate opened. Taemin felt even cheaper than he had felt before, how could he even think of doing anything to the other ever again. He was on a whole different level.

It was not that Taemin is not used to rich customers – hell no, he was basically living off of rich customers – so why was he disappointed like this? The dancer could not quite make sense of his feelings when the gate closed behind Minho and the taller had disappeared from his view without even thanking him for the ride. But what did he expect? The other didn’t seem to like him anyway.

Taemin mentally slapped himself for being interested in someone for the first time in a long time. He had learned the hard way that in his field of work it was the worst thing you could do: Being interested in someone romantically – it was destined to fail.

These thoughts in his mind, the dancer got back on the motorcycle. The whole drive home his mind kept going back to the taller male. He hated himself for finding himself attracted to the other, someone who was definitely not playing in his league. Not in any possible way.

They lived in completely different worlds, not only was the tall male as straight as he could be, but also must be extremely wealthy if he lived at a place like that. Fucking Chaebols… Probably born with a silver spoon in his mouth…

The ride home was torture since Taemin and Kibum’s apartment was located on the other side of the city. It took Taemin over half an hour until he finally arrived at the complex in which their small place was. It was torture because all that time self-hatred grew inside of him.

Taemin had the bad habit of projecting everything on himself, feeling that it was his fault that he felt this way. It was his fault for thinking about Minho, it was his fault for being such a low human being. He could not allow something like him to be attracted to someone like Minho. He could not let it get that far.

Inside of the apartment he called out Kibum’s name to make sure the other was not home even though he was sure of that even before he did so. When Kibum found interest in someone sexually he usually was not done with them until morning.

When one of his weak moments hit him, he could not let his guard down. He could never let anyone know this side of him. Even less Kibum.

Soothing emotional pain with physical pain, he knew it wasn’t the right thing to do, but why then does it calm him down?

After taking all his clothes off he went to the bathroom, closing the door behind him, locking it, just to be safe, and took out the little box in the back of the cupboard underneath the sink, where he hid his small blade and disinfectant.

He stood there in front of the mirror, looking at his naked body; he knew he looked good, he knew he was handsome, he knew he had the right amount of muscles, he knew he had graceful body proportions, hell he even was satisfied with the size of his penis – he was told enough that he was beautiful. Despite knowing all of this, believing it was the hard part. He still hated everything. He hated the perfectly shaped nipples; he hated his legs which were beautifully toned. He hated his handsome face with the perfect plump lips, just as much as he hated his long hair.

The tattoos on the other hand he adored. Getting them had been the best decision of his life.

When he was done looking at himself, comparing himself the tall male he had met tonight, he grabbed the small blade which felt so familiar in his hand while his other hand moved to the side of his crotch. Just where his public hair got thinner, a clear line in his skin was visible.

Taemin was not a self-harmer per-se – that was at least what he told himself. He had never had the desire to do more than this, he kept it as small as possible for no one to notice. That was why he chose a spot that even in his kind of work was not always visible. He always used the same spot so that he could make an excuse for that one scar that he had. One scar that neither moved nor multiplied was easier to explain.

He brought the blade to the thick skin and pressed the metal through. As soon as blood seeped through the cut, Taemin immediately felt better – he had gotten his punishment for his feelings towards the tall male he had met just tonight. He did the same twice more, cutting the already cut skin again.

Admiring the sight of his blood streaming down his legs in small lines he put away the blade, cleaning off the blood, putting it back in the small box, now taking the disinfectant – he wasn’t stupid after all. No need to get the cut infected. He could not allow himself to stay away from work.

After cleaning himself and hiding the box back in the usual place, he put a band aid onto the fresh cut, then slowly walked to his room.

This is what you get for being desperate – Taemin scolded himself and put on his boxers and a shirt.

Exhausted from today he fell asleep soon after.


	6. A Wave Of Jealousy

After the incident at the gay club, Minho tried his best to keep the dancer out of his thoughts. But sometimes, in the strangest situations his memories came back, and he saw the other male’s eyes staring into his own. He kept blaming what happened on the alcohol and everything else he had consumed that night. But despite that, the strange feeling in his guts never really went away.

After all that had happened that night, the worst thing was facing Jinki. When they met the next day, the whole atmosphere was awkward. Jinki was unsure about how Minho was taking the new situation of knowing his best friend was gay and if the taller would blame him for taking him to a gay club.

Minho on the other hand was worried that Jinki had somehow heard about what had happened to him that night so he tried not to bring the whole topic up. Therefore, the whole evening was pushed aside by both, for different reasons.

Because of the awkwardness, neither of them spoke a lot, they just sat across from each other in the cafeteria, eating their lunch. The only time a small conversation started was when Son Nahee, a female student from one of Minho’s classes, came over to their table to ask Minho for the notes from the last lecture.

“Did you take any notes in Professor Han’s lecture yesterday?” She asked, running her fingers through her hair. Nahee was not at all the prettiest girl around, but she was decent looking enough for Minho to be interested. Her hair was short and a dark brown, her eyes the same colour.

“Yes, I did. Do you need them?” Minho asked and Nahee nodded, smiling cutely at the attractive male that sat at the table.

“That would be great yes. Thank you” She blushed slightly when Minho put his chopsticks aside and got a piece of paper and a pen from his bag.

“Here, give me your email and I’ll send them to you. If you have any questions just let me know, I can look at them with you anytime.” Minho smirked, and the girl wrote down her email address, smiling at Minho when she gave the pen back. He never gave out his phone number. It was too much of a hassle if everyone knew his number so he usually sticked to exchanging email addresses. He had made one especially for this kind of things.

“I will message you for sure.” She said, “Thank you again.”

“You are more than welcome honey.” Minho answered and watched as Nahee walked back over to her group of friends who seemed to have been watching the whole scene.

“Aren’t you tired of these one-night-flings?” Jinki, who had followed the conversation silently, said.

“Why would I be? I get my release, no strings attached. It is a win-win situation.”

“I just wanted to know if you never wanted to actually be in a serious relationship… having someone by your side not only sexually but also romantically.” Jinki said, slightly disappointed by the answer he had gotten from his best friend.

“Where does this suddenly come from Jinki? You have never cared about my intimate relationships. Is there something I don’t know about?” Minho asked, confused because Jinki had never really given an opinion about his excessive sex-life.

“Uh, it is nothing – But do you not want to fall in love with someone?”

“Jinki, I thought you knew me by now. I get tired of people way too fast. I could never just stay with one person.”

Jinki just nodded, not having anything left to say, Minho made it clear enough that he wasn’t interested.

The same evening, Minho received an E-mail from Nahee, replying to his, which had his notes attached.

The next night, the two of them spent together in a hostel. There was just one thing that was different from the previous times he was at that place with his ever-changing partners; throughout the whole night, the visit at the gay club was very present in his mind, giving him a headache and the need to prove his sexuality.

He usually got confessed to by people who liked him, so Nahee’s confession didn’t come as a surprise. His reaction this time was different though. Normally he would politely tell them that this, to him, was nothing more than a one-night-thing and didn’t leave any strings attached. The first thing that came to his mind now, was that maybe he should agree to go out again sometime – remembering Jinki giving him the idea of actually trying to get into a serious relationship for once.

Also, the temptation was big, to prove, more to himself than to anyone else, that the long-haired dancer did not occupy his thoughts – he wasn’t gay after all. The possibility of him being interested in a man was as close to zero as it could get.

So, when Nahee asked him to meet again he agreed, much to the poor girl’s surprise. It was known that Minho did not do relationships but nevertheless people always tried, hoping they were the best fuck he had ever had and MAYBE get to have a second round.

It was the first time he did not leave the hostel early but stayed the night, sleeping next to a naked girl, proving to himself that he is the straightest human being on this earth.

Taemin on the other hand went back to his usual self, getting up around noon, warming up some food they had stored in the refrigerator. Kibum and Taemin usually cooked an afternoon and then they lived off those dishes for the next two weeks, just making new rice. After eating he went to the club, practicing in the small studio it had in its back. Soon he would have a routine planned with Kibum, so he was spending most of his time choreographing it, as Kibum was too busy with university work.

Ever since the older had started his studies he wasn’t around that much anymore. The only days he had time to come to practice were on weekends. It was obviously hard to balance University with his work at the club, but Taemin could not afford to take over the financial support for the two of them. So, he did his best to support Kibum wherever he could – which also included choreographing the new performance by himself and teaching it to the other on the weekend.

A few weeks passed like this and less and less did the tall straight man appear in Taemin’s head until he was pretty much forgotten. The performance Taemin had choreographed was a huge hit as was everything the long-haired male did and, one day, Jonghyun came to Taemin’s practice room in the afternoon to talk about an offer.

As Taemin didn’t have any dances scheduled on Thursday evenings, he went straight home after practice, a smile on his face.

He was waiting at the table with dinner when the door to their small apartment opened and Kibum appeared in the door frame. The older male looked completely spent, his eyes tired while taking off his coat, placing the heavy bag filled with books on the floor.

“Kibum.” Taemin said, still smiling, knowing that he was finally able to get the other male some rest.

Kibum looked confused at the other’s smile and tired from the long day at university.

“Sit down.” The long-haired male said.

“Taemin what is up, you are scaring me.” Kibum said, confused about his friend’s behaviour.

When Kibum had taken off his shoes and sat down, Taemin started speaking, the smile not leaving his face. It was the first good thing that had happened ever since the two of them got to know each other, except for Kibum getting into university.

“Jonghyun talked to me today. And he offered me a job as a choreographer. He promised to pay me monthly in addition to the money I make from the performances. You know? Regular paycheck.”

Kibum’s eyes grew bigger with every word Taemin said, not quite believing what he said.

“I know you are having a tough time balancing work and uni. So, I want you to take a break from the club and focus on your studies.” Taemin said, voice and face dead serious, not leaving any room for discussions.

There was a short silence while Kibum did his best to take in the information he had just gotten, his face looking unsure about how to react to his friend’s plan.

“Taemin” He said after a few seconds “I really appreciate your concern. But you should know that I cannot do that. You are my friend and I don’t want to depend on you financially. I just can’t have you working your ass off, just so I can focus on my studies. How about your life? Don’t you want to study and get a proper job to turn your life around? This was what you said when we first met. I don’t want to be the reason why you cannot get away from this.”

Taemin’s gaze moved to the kitchen table, looking down at the old wood. “I think we both know I don’t have the resources to get a proper job. I am not a genius like you Kibum. All I ever knew was how to dance. So, don’t even talk about getting a ‘proper job’, this is the most proper I can go.” The long-haired male knew that Kibum was watching him closely with his ‘you can succeed in anything if you just want it’-look.

“You can think of this as an investment.” He said while Kibum was thinking about how to answer. “I promise you I will be able to manage myself. I just want you to get properly educated without working yourself into oblivion just because of a few stupid bills that I can easily pay by myself.”

“Taemin, I cannot-“ Kibum started

“No, Listen. I want this. Please. If you feel better, we can take records of the bills I pay, and you can pay me back when you have a good job. You are way too smart for staying at a gay club. I like what I do. I promise. Just let me do this for you.”

Somehow Taemin was able to persuade the older and a few weeks after, Kibum quit the job at the club while Taemin worked even harder, creating new choreographies for the other dancers, teaching it to them before having his own performances in the evenings. Both of them were busy and they did not see each other often due to the different time schedule.

The only times they saw each other for longer than a few minutes was when they were cooking together to prepare food for the next weeks. It had become one of their most valued traditions. They were exchanging stories of their daily lives, Taemin telling Kibum about the other dancers and Kibum talking about the new friends he met at university.

“Tae, I have something to tell you.” Kibum said while salting cabbage, making Taemin look up from the Kimchi-paste he was making.

“That sounds serious Kim, what is it?”

“I am meeting someone.”

“Well uhm good? What time?” Taemin said, confused as to why Kibum made his meeting sound like something so serious.

“No, I mean, I am meeting someone, like romantically.” Taemin who just had his finger, coated in Kimchi-paste, in his mouth to taste how spicy it was, choked and coughed from surprise.

“You are what?” Taemin’s voice was rough and his eyes wide, looking at his friend in disbelief. Never had either of them “met someone romantically” All there had been for them were hook-ups with either clients or random people from a bar.

“I know, it is strange, and I never planned for this to happen, but it just sort of did and I think I really like him”

“Uhm well… so what is his name?” Taemin asked when he was over the first shock.

“His name is Jinki, he is in his last bachelor semester at university.” Kibum said, blushing slightly at the thought of the older male.

“If he is that much older how did you guys meet?”

“Actually, we met at the club, he was one of the guys I took up on stage a few month ago.”

Taemin lifted his eyebrows “So you have known him for a few months already? And you are only telling me about it now? I am disappointed” The long-haired male said.

“I didn’t want to bring it up too early as we were in the stage of ‘just friends with benefits’ for very long. But we made it official this week.”

A wave of jealousy rolled over Taemin’s insides, but he knew that he would never be good enough to get into a serious relationship like that. Other than Kibum he didn’t have a future, at least not a stable one. And his past? He didn’t even want to think of the number of disgusting things he had done. He was used and dirty, nothing anyone could admire or even love.

Taemin had gotten used to that sad truth, it wasn’t something he could undo anyway. But seeing his best friend achieving what he had secretly wished for all this time filled him with sadness. He didn’t want to be jealous of his friend, he wanted the other to be happy. He wanted Kibum to find love. He just wished he could too.

Taemin didn’t answer for quite a while and Kibum patiently waited for the younger to respond. Despite being friends for a few years now, they had never talked much about love. It used to be a topic neither of them liked to talk about.

“I would really like you to meet him.” Kibum then softly said, unsure about the reason for the silence between them. “After all you are the most precious person in my life, and I want you to approve of our relationship.”

Taemin nodded, listening to what Kibum said only with one ear, his mind going back and forth between being happy for Kibum and hating himself for never being able to have something like it.

“Tae?” Kibum said, waking the younger male from his daydreams. The Kimchi paste was long forgotten.

“Yes, sorry, I was thinking.” Taemin said

“I just asked you if you would join me for Jinki’s birthday party.”

“I’ll see what I can do.” Taemin mumbled “But I’ll probably be working.”

“If you want, I can talk to Jonghyun so you can have an evening off, you have been working so much lately.” Kibum said, hands going back to salting the cabbage.

Taemin just nodded, focusing back on the kimchi paste which just needed a little more onions.

The remaining time of them cooking was silent. Kibum did not ask any questions about why Taemin seemed to be less enthusiastic than he should be. He had known the younger long enough to know that he doesn’t like to be questioned about his actions and even less his feelings. So, he simply let the new information sink in.

“I’ll go take a shower” Taemin said when they had finished most of what they had planned on making.

“Sure” Kibum just answered while packing the freshly made JjabJae into a plastic container.

A few minutes later, Taemin had undressed himself completely, staring at his frame in the mirror with a disgusted look. In his hand he already held softly, almost lovingly, the freshly sanitised blade. With his other hand, he followed the thin line on his hips. From the regular cutting, the skin around the bright scar had changed colour as well, it was now slightly darker than his normal skin colour, making the scar stand out even more than it would have without.

With a calm hand he sunk the blade into the thick skin, tearing it apart once more, letting the beautiful liquid drip down along his toned legs. He felt better. Lighter.

Nightmares filled the following night. He had had many ups and downs in his life. So, every time he woke up drenched in sweat in the middle of the night, he told himself that this, too, would pass. Whenever he fell back asleep, Kibum was once again dragged away from him and all he could do was watch as their hands let go of each other.

The next morning, he felt as if a truck had run him over. His long hair was messy and his eyes tired when he looked at the mirror in the bathroom.

“SHIT!” He screamed at his own face before he started crying.

Taemin was glad, Kibum had gone to university already. He had no idea how to face the other male. He wanted to be happy for him. He really did. But whenever he thought of Kibum right now, he would think about how worthless he, himself, is.

Going to work felt good. The familiar space of the studio calmed him down and his breath synchronised with the music and his movements.

It took him a few days, a few days without seeing Kibum, to smile at his friend's newly found love without blaming his life choices and his whole existence. The first time they saw each other again was on Saturday around noon. Kibum was sitting at the kitchen table reading when Taemin got up after a long night.

“Good morning” The long-haired male said, getting himself some rice from the rice cooker.

“Morning” Kibum said, looking up from his text. “How are you? How was work?”

“As always, you know how it is, lots of horny men and alcohol.” Taemin pressed the button on the water machine and after a short beep water started filling the glass. “I am just a little tired.”

“Are you sure? You have been working so much lately. Don’t you think you should turn it down a little bit? You are basically working two jobs right now, choreographing and performing at the same time.” Kibum was worried about his friend, he had gotten calmer than he used to be.

“I am doing alright, don’t worry. It was my choice after all.” Taemin said, taking the glass and his rice, putting it on the table. “When is your Jinki’s birthday? I will try to make it.” He then said while walking over to the fridge to get himself some side dishes.

Kibum looked surprised, he had thought Taemin would keep ignoring the fact that he had gotten into a relationship. For the last week the younger didn’t show any signs that he wanted to meet Jinki.

After a few seconds of silence, Kibum answered: “Ah uhm, it is next week on Friday.”

Taemin sat down with his pickled radish and sweet potato side dish, nodding. “I’ll ask Jonghyun if I can leave out the performance that day.” Kibum beamed a warm smile at the younger and the latter smiled back slightly, realizing how important it was to his best friend that he got to know Jinki.

The long-haired male started eating shortly after. He was glad that he managed to get a grip in time. Kibum’s smile had been more than enough.

“Thank you”

Taemin looked up from his rice, meeting Kibum’s eyes.

“Thank you for opening up. You have no idea what it means to me.” The older spoke.

“I am your best friend; shouldn’t I be supportive of whatever is important to you?”

“We both know that our backgrounds do not leave a lot of space to support certain things.” Kibum said, looking sad.

“But anyway. I will be there. I promise.”


	7. Make it Double, No Ice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to add chapters regularly from now on. It was originally posted on AFF but isn't completed yet there either. Currently I am improving the quality of my 2 year old writing by going over all the chapters I have written before - I forgot so many things that I didn't feel comfortable writing the last chapters without reading the story again completely. So here we are... There are a few changes in the reactions of characters but the story-line more or less stays the same.

The day of the birthday party got closer and closer and Taemin was re-evaluating his decision of going every single time he thought about it. Knowing that this Jinki was a university student, older than them, he guessed most of the guests to be intellectuals who were way above his standards of company. Not to even think about the University he was going to. It was one of the most expensive ones, so he guessed that many of the people studying there, if not on scholarship, were pretty well-off.

He shook his head and looked at himself in the mirror of the dance studio. His long hair was falling into his face, hiding most of his androgynous features. Do it for Kibum, he thought over and over again while practicing the new choreography, he had made for himself.

When he entered their apartment building around 5pm that day, he found several envelops in the letterbox. Seeing these made his blood run cold. He had completely forgotten about them. Upstairs he took off his coat and sat onto one of their wooden chairs, putting the envelopes on the table in front of him. He didn’t even want to open them. He knew what was inside.

It was the water and electricity bill. When calculating if his earnings would be enough to support Kibum he did not count in these bills. They only came once a year. Always at the beginning of December.

“Dammit” Taemin cursed, looking at the numbers on the paper. If he payed those now, there would not be any money left for paying the rent of November. For a few more minutes he looked at the numbers, using his phone to calculate if he could somehow manage to meet the amount and still have money left over for rent.

They had never been late with paying their bills. And Taemin wanted to keep it that way. It would only make problems if they started being late for payments, earning debt and, who knows, even taking loans it would be the beginning of a spiral.

He could try to get another job. But his week was already packed with the two he was working. He ruffled his hair with one of his hands while the other one clenched around the bill.

There was one thing he was sure of, he could not let Kibum know about these bills. The older had had such a hard time accepting the fact that the younger wanted to support him, and it took him even longer to agree to it. Taemin could not let Kibum get back to work. And he knew that if the other knew he was struggling with money; he would be back to work that very day.

So, all he could do for now was hide these bills from Kibum. He put them underneath the matrass he was sleeping on.

That night, Kibum came home late, Taemin guessed he had been with Jinki as there was no other logical explanation for the older to be back after 12. The younger heard how Kibum put down his keys and tried to be as quiet as possible to not wake Taemin, knowing it was the only evening the younger male didn’t have to perform at the club.

Kibum’s efforts were in vain as Taemin didn’t manage to close an eye that night, worrying about how he would be able to get together the money to pay all of the bills and their daily life expenses without Kibum noticing his struggles.

When he got up the next morning at around 8, the older male was already gone and had left a sticky note on the table.

It said: “Hey Tae, don’t forget to be at the party tonight, it’ll start at 10” then there was an address somewhere in Gangnam and a few hearts. Taemin groaned. He really didn't want to miss the performance tonight, he needed that money, now even more than under normal circumstances.

Time at the studio today went by fast as he was with some of the new dancers, teaching them the choreography which should be performed next week for the first time. The newbies weren’t doing so badly and Taemin was quite satisfied with the result of today’s training when they finally finished up at around seven, leaving only a few hours until the long-haired male had to be in Gangnam at the birthday party of some rich smart guy whom he had never met.

But this guy was Kibum’s boyfriend, so he needed to keep it together. He hurried back home to take a shower, apply some makeup, do his hair and put on some black leather pants that showed his beautifully toned legs and backside very well. The thin white shirt he put on had a wide V-neck, showing a little too much of his chest, almost reaching his nipples and the openings for the arms were way too wide and gave a free view of most of his naked side, including the tattoos that shimmered through the thin fabric on his back as well. Since it was winter, and quite cold, Taemin put on a striped turtleneck as well before grabbing his beloved jeans jacket.

He knew he would have to excuse himself from the party as soon as he could, going back to the club, maybe make some money by sucking off a few clients – He was prepared for that. The outfit and the way he had put on his make-up was a little too provocative for a simple birthday party. As much as he disliked the idea, he couldn’t bail on Kibum, he wouldn’t be forgiven easily if he did. With one last look in the mirror he left the apartment building and walked to the subway.

His loose hair was blowing in the heavy, freezing wind and he shivered. He hadn’t eaten anything but breakfast today, so his body was weak and tired already and the cold did not help at all. He was very glad when he finally got to the subway station where the wind stopped.

Following the instructions Kibum had given him earlier, he finally made it to the address at around 11pm, realizing that it was very close to the streets where he used to make his money in a way he regretted until this very day. It had been before he got the job at the club, therefore before he met Kibum. Neither of them really talked about their lives before they met. So, he couldn’t be angry at Kibum for inviting him to a place close to where he used to sell himself. Nevertheless, it made his mood even worse than it already was. Couldn’t he just once not be followed by his past wherever he went? Was that too much to ask?

With his hands in the pockets of his jeans-jacket he took a deep breath and entered the building through a glass door. Kibum had told him that the place they had rented for this was in the top floor, so he waited for the elevator to come down. When the door opened, a group of men got out, all of them having a cigarette either behind their ear or in their hands. They did not pay any attention to the smaller male and walked past him chatting loudly.

Taemin guessed that these were guys from the party and his non-existent mood got even worse, if that was possible. It was pretty much what he expected to see. Rich university students who enjoyed their lives to the fullest, not needing to worry about their existence in this society even once in their life, smoking because it was labelled as “cool”. The long-haired male didn’t even realize that he had looked after them with the feeling that the one who got out of the elevator first was vaguely familiar. He shook his head and pressed the button at the elevator again as the door had closed already.

Shortly after he arrived on the top floor the door that was hiding the spacious penthouse which was filled with chatting people and music opened. He almost felt as if he was at work, making him feel slightly more comfortable instantly. The only difference was that there were mostly people around his age, and unlike at his workplace, it included women.

There were a few eyes on the androgynous male, probably to find out whether the long-haired male was a woman or a man but whenever he met the eyes of someone staring, the other person looked away.

Taemin felt out of place, standing there alone at the entrance in midst of all these university students. A few more seconds he stood there and then put on his usual confident poker face, walking over to the bar, the only place he wouldn’t feel this out of place. There were not many people yet due to the early hour, so he managed to dodge the few who were already dancing in the space between the entrance and the bar. With a heavy sigh he let himself fall onto one of the bar stools, getting the attention of the very short barkeeper instantly.

“What can I get you milady?” He asked flirty, making Taemin groan. As good as his long hair was for getting tips at work, it was inconvenient in situations like this. Being mistaken for a girl wasn’t exactly the greatest thing.

“Give me some whiskey” He said, purposely in a very deep voice, confusing the barkeeper for a second before he turned around to get the different bottles of whiskey he had. After explaining each one and its taste, Taemin just pointed at any of the bottles, shit, this was way too fancy for him. He just wanted the alcohol as he had no clue how to survive this evening without.

“Make it double, no ice” He added shortly, and the barkeeper just nodded, doing his job properly. He already had the money out when he got strange looks from the other.

“It’s inclusive. No need to pay” The small male said.

“Oh, I see” Taemin said, gladly putting the money back to the pocket of his jacket and took a sip of the whisky which seemed to be way older than what he was used to getting after work.

The barkeeper went back to work, but was mostly flirting with all the girls, who visibly enjoyed the attention.

Taemin kept looking for Kibum but gave up after a few minutes, emptying his glass.

“Can I get another one?” He signed to the barkeeper that was talking a bit further away. The small man just nodded and not too long after a second glass was on the bar in front of Taemin.

This wasn’t good. If it was free, he already saw himself drinking himself into oblivion. While he was sipping on his drink, he watched the people around him without much interest, trying to listen to a few conversations but giving up when the alcohol slowly started to enter his system.

Luckily, soon after he had ordered his second glass, Kibum appeared behind him, smiling at his best friend. That moment, Taemin was reminded why he was doing this to himself. Seeing Kibum’s smile, a real genuine smile, one that they did not see on each other often, made Taemin smile back at him.

“You made it!” The happy male said, putting an arm around Taemin’s slim frame. “Let’s go and meet Jinki!” he pulled Taemin away from the bar, making the other feel dizzy for a second. As he had not eaten properly today, the whisky went into his system way too fast, making him lose his balance and hold onto Kibum before he could fall.

“Tae!” The older said, looking confused. “What did you drink for god’s sake?” Kibum held Taemin up with one hand, his other reaching for the glass on the bar, taking just a very small sip.

“Holy shit, of course you drink the strongest there is. Are you alright?”

Taemin who had by now gotten his balance back, nodded and took his full glass. “Sure, I just got up too fast, I am good now.” He said. And he really was.

Kibum was visibly excited, pulling the younger male over to the other side of the room, where the whole wall was made from windows, giving a perfect view of Gangnam by night. There were some sofas around and a few people chatting while drinking fancy drinks.

Kibum walked right to the most crowded place where some guys were sitting, some standing, talking to each other. Particularly one of the guys, smiled lovingly at the two of them as they approached the group.

No surprise to Taemin that this man was the one Kibum wanted him to meet.

“Tae, this is Jinki” Kibum said, when they got to them. Jinki beamed a beautiful smile at him and the long-haired male had to admit that the older male was incredibly attractive while still looking very gentle.

Taemin took the hand he was offered and smiled back slightly. “Hi, nice to meet you” he said, slightly awkward as he was not used to just meeting new people in a friendly way. New dancers: yes, customers: yes, but meeting new people outside of work was not quite his cup of tea.

“Likewise!” Jinki said, letting Taemin’s surprisingly small hands go.

If it weren’t for Kibum it would have been awkward from that very moment on. But the other managed to keep a conversation going between them. Taemin was also introduced to some of the others who were around, earning some smiles and some strange looks because of his androgynous appearance. The upper class didn’t seem to be used to people not fitting into either gender. All the men around had short hair, and strong features, their clothing obviously masculine, most of them wearing an earthy expensive perfume and the same went for the girls; long hair, feminine make-up and short dresses.

After a few moments, a new group of guys joined them, spreading the smell of smoke around them, awakening the urge for a cigarette deep inside Taemin. Without looking up at the newly arriving guys, he drank the rest of his whisky in one go and placed the glass on the transparent table in front of him, turning to Kibum who sat next to him, chatting to one of Jinki’s friends.

“Excuse me for a second” The long-haired male said, standing up, his hand already reaching for the pack of cigarettes in the pocket of his jacket.

“You want me to come with you?” Kibum asked but Taemin just shook his head and walked away, head hung low to not meet any eyes.

On his way through all the people, he realised it must have gotten later as there were many more bodies around the dance floor than before. Now, he felt the alcohol kick in properly. And he loved the feeling. That moment he decided to never eat before drinking again, like this he could save so much money and still get drunk in no time.

“Hey sweety” He heard a voice from his side when he had almost reached the exit. “Are you up for some fun?”

That moment his drunk mind had a not so great but great idea. He turned around to look at the man who had called him. He was obviously a few years older than him and looked pretty much like all the other guys at this party. Taemin smirked at the slightly taller male.

“Always” He said softly, surprising the other male who didn’t think something as cheap as this would work. The long-haired male walked closer and then grabbing the taller’s shirt, pulling him down, their lips crashing together.

The older male was frozen in surprise as he hadn’t expected the woman to approach him like that. He was not moving against Taemin’s lips at all while the shorter male kissed him passionately, his tongue playing with the older man’s while his hand wandered south.

Right when the taller had accustomed to the situation, now moving his lips and tongue against Taemin’s, the long-haired males hand reached his crotch and gripped it roughly, making the older hiss in pain. Not surprisingly, the older man pulled away from Taemin's lips cursing while breathing heavily. As the taller male tried to get away from Taemin's strong grip, but the latter just held onto the other man's manhood even tighter, getting closer to his ear.

"I am no sweety. So, fuck off." Taemin whispered into the other's ear sweetly, his voice dropping an octave, sending shivers down the taller man's spine. With those words, he let go of the other man and turned around, walking out the door, leaving the baffled guy behind.

The other guys had already gone back to up which left just Minho and Kiwan downstairs finishing off their second cigarettes before going inside silently, taking the elevator back up.

When Minho opened the door to the penthouse, he was greeted by a couple making out passionately. He was almost walking past them when he heard the guy hiss in pain. It made him stop in his tracks and look back. Only to see the girl's tight grip on the others crotch and a sly smirk on her familiar face as she leaned in to whisper something into the pained man's ear.

Minho's eyes grew bigger. He knew exactly who this was. He felt like his worst nightmare just got real. The only person on this earth who knew about the night he regretted the most was here. Here, at his best friend's party. Luck really wasn't on his side.

He just saw how the long-haired male walked away when he turned around, afraid of being recognized. For few seconds he wondered how on earth that dancer could show up at Jinki's birthday party. It was too much of a coincidence. Did Jinki go to that club this often? Did he meet him there? But the older was in a relationship now, so why would he. And Kibum had stopped working there.

That was when he remembered Jinki telling him that they would be meeting Kibum's best friend tonight. Of course, the universe wanted this best friend to be the ONE guy that he had been intimate with in a state of complete intoxication.

There were so many dancers at that club, why did it need to be this guy? Couldn't Kibum have another best friend? Of course not. Looking back, he should have known - after all the first time he had seen the long-haired male and Kibum was when these two were together, driving off with the motorcycle.

Minho's mind went back and forth over the long-haired man while walking over to where Jinki and his other close friends were sitting.

"Oh Minho!" Jinki said waving him over "You just missed Taemin. He's really cute."

Minho screeched inside. CUTE?! That Taemin had just almost ripped off another man's balls. And Jinki called him cute.

Pretending he didn't know who they were talking about, Minho said: "So, I guess I am looking forward to meeting him soon!"

Minho was glad that Jinki did not bring up the night at the gay club in their circle of friends. It would have been so easy to tell the taller that this Taemin is the long-haired dancer they saw performing on stage that night. But Jinki knew that it would destroy Minho if any of their other friends ever heard he had been in a gay club. It had taken quite a few weeks for them to accept that Jinki was in a homosexual relationship and they didn’t even know about Kibum's previous job.

Surprisingly, Kibum managed to win over their friends’ hearts fast and even Minho grew to like the smaller male faster than he thought he would. But it was Jinki after all. He couldn't push the older away; he was the person he trusted the most. So, whoever he loved should be accepted by Minho as long as that person treated Jinki the way he deserved.

After getting a drink at the bar, Minho watched the people on the dancefloor, looking for potential company for the night. Technically he was in a relationship with this girl from his lecture, but as he had foreseen, he had gotten bored of Nahee after a week and he was only staying with her to calm his conscience, proving he didn’t waver. She said wouldn't turn up at the party due to family issues and left Minho with an evening he could enjoy to the fullest. After a few minutes he had decided on his target for the night.

Soon after, he had finished his drink, walked onto the dance floor and was dancing behind the blonde girl who was rubbing her backside against his crotch just seconds after he approached her.

When Taemin finished his cigarette, he walked over to the closest GS25 to buy a bottle of Soju. He was already tired of the fancy drinks they served in that penthouse. And those 2000won would be worth it if it could help him survive this evening.

The bottle was opened as soon as he left the convenient store and Taemin swallowed the watery alcohol with joy. This is what alcohol should taste like.

By the time he was back in the penthouse he had emptied half the bottle, putting it on the floor on the side of the door. He felt so much better than before, walking through the moving bodies. He always found it hilarious to call these grinding hips dancing.

He was welcomed back warm heartedly by a drunk Kibum. The latter seemed to have drunken quite something during the 30 minutes Taemin had been gone. The older male hugged him tightly and then put his arm around his younger friend.

“Listen” He shouted, getting the attention of the others. “This is my best friend! He is a choreographer! DO YOU WANT TO SEE HIM DANCE???” The whole group of people by the window started cheering instantly, throwing their hands in the air while Taemin threw an evil look at his best friend. He hated drunk Kibum.

“Fuck you Kim, I will not.” He almost growled but he was already pulled towards the DJ. If it had only been Kibum he could have fought it, but there was a stronger dude pushing from the back, leaving him no choice but to follow his friend.

“The name of the new choreography’s song was ‘Thirsty’ wasn’t it?” Kibum asked when they were next to the DJ-desk and Taemin didn’t even get to answer because Kibum was already waving over the DJ, talking to him for a few seconds.

“It’ll be the next song.” Kibum smirked excitedly, and Taemin threw an angry look at him.

“I will not dance. Not here. I am not at work Kim Kibum” He said the second part so softly, only Kibum would hear.

“I know you are not. Please…” Kibum whined “I really want to see the new choreography; you barely show me your stuff since I am not working anymore. And I am sure Jinki would appreciate it as a birthday gift.”

“You know, it is a choreography for a fucking strip club. I cannot play with my freaking dick in front of all these college students, not to speak of your boyfriend. I don’t want to be seen as an erotic dancer here. So please. Let me live” Knowing drunk Kibum, he knew that he could say whatever he wanted, and the older male would still get his wish. He tried anyway. Just one night he hoped to forget.

“You can just leave those parts away and add some freestyle moves. Common you are not an amateur. Pleaseeee!”

Taemin had to give in. “Fine, but I will do it over there and not in midst all of these people. There is no space anyway.”

Kibum was good with this, so they walked back over to the side of the dancefloor where there weren’t as many people and the closer friends at the windows could see him clearly. Before Kibum could walk away as well, Taemin called him back.

“Bum! Just know you will pay for this. Hold this my stuff.” He said taking off his jacket and the striped turtleneck, leaving him in the thin white shirt that didn’t really cover anything, earning looks from all sides, some surprised that he was a guy – such a well built one even, some surprised to see the tattoos on his chest shimmering through, as tattoos weren't usually seen in Korea, and others simply admiring the amount of skin he was showing. He handed his clothes to Kibum who gladly took them and walked over to Jinki and the others, probably bragging about his closest friend.

Taemin stood there, completely alone, concentrating. The soju he had drunken before had not yet gotten into his system so as a professional dancer he tried to get this performance, even if it wasn’t an official one, over as good as possible.

When he felt the other song ending, he laid down onto the floor, getting strange looks from all sides.

As soon as the music started, his surroundings were forgotten, and he started the choreography he had been working on for his new performance.

Like always when he was dancing, his body felt like he was on fire and he carried out every single movement perfectly. He left out whatever was too sexual for this environment, just slightly moving his hand across his chest instead of rubbing his crotch.

Behind him on the dancefloor people continued to move to the beat. But most eyes were on the long-haired male who, as soon as the chorus started, was rocking his body to the beat perfectly, carrying out the movements sharp and precise. There were some whistles from the side, where Jinki and his friends were sitting every time he perfectly made his spins or kicked the air with his toned legs.

By the time he was on the floor thrusting the air, the whistles weren’t only coming from that side of the room.

The song ended with Taemin on his knees, him laying back down on the floor, breathing heavily, his head spinning as the alcohol started to kick in.

The new song that started was slower than the ones before, but also more sensual, something he didn’t hate at all as it made the blond-haired girl he had approached earlier move against his body slower, giving him the chance to enjoy every part of her body.

After the first chorus though, he opened his half-lidded eyes because the girl had stopped moving and had her head turned to her left, following the movements of someone on the side of the dancefloor. When his eyes adjusted to the light again, he recognised Taemin as the dancer who made most of the people on the dancefloor watch instead of dance.

The long-haired male moved gracefully across the floor; every single move calculated. He felt memories of the night they met surfacing, making him feel hot as he watched the dancer’s body beneath the shirt, which was cut way to wide and let Minho see the toned torso underneath it, the muscles flexing with every move.

The song was over way too fast and Minho was still staring at the man who was now lying on the floor, catching his breath. There were whistles all over and Minho saw Kibum walking over to the completely spent dancer, helping him up and then guiding him back to where Jinki and the others were sitting.

Now that it was over, Minho noticed the tightness in his pants. It couldn’t be. His eyes went wide as he felt the heat in his pants. He could not have gotten aroused by this. Embarrassment rushed over him and before anyone could see him in this state he rushed away, over to the toilets, closing the stall door behind him.

The visit to the toilet took him almost 20 minutes, jerking off to the thought of the long-haired dancer sucking him off.

“I’ll never have a sip of alcohol again” He mumbled to himself when he cleaned up his now almost flaccid penis and pulled his pants back up.

He needed a smoke. Right now. On his way out of the penthouse, he crossed paths with Jinki who told him that he wouldn’t be able to meet Taemin as the younger had already left because he did not feel too well. Little did Jinki know how happy Minho was to not have to meet Taemin face to face.

“I am sure there will be a next time” Minho said, trying to sound sweet.

Few minutes later he was down in the alley smoking. He had to get his mind off the dancer. He wasn't gay, he couldn't be attracted to a man. But no matter what he did, he wasn't able to take his thoughts anywhere but the latter’s gracefully sensual movements and his beautifully toned body.

Minho shook his head violently and started walking. Maybe that was a way to get other thoughts and forget about the incredible attraction he felt to the other man.

So, Minho was wandering around, not quite knowing where he went. His mind was clouded from the alcohol, still seeing images of the long-haired dancer before his eyes. Then he got onto a somewhat busier street. There were red signs all over the place pointing to illegal whore houses which were made up like Noraebang-places (Karaoke) to not raise suspicion with authorities.

Maybe this was the way to get his mind off Taemin. It didn’t seem like such a bad option; it wasn’t as if he didn’t have the money to pay for high quality prostitutes like you could find here in Gangnam

He looked around, trying to decide on one of the countless places he could go to, when a bright white and obviously very expensive car got his attention, or more: the figure that was bent down to the half open window, showing off his beautiful backside in those tight black leather pants, talking to the person on the backseat.

He saw money being handed though the window, being counted, then the door of the car opened, and the long-haired male got inside, disappearing from Minho’s view.

Completely oblivious to what his body was doing, Minho walked towards the starting car, standing right in its way, forcing it to stop shortly after it had started moving. Headlights were dazzling his eyes, the horn ringed in his ears but Minho didn’t budge.


	8. Remembering Patterns

After getting praises for his performance from all sides, Taemin felt completely overwhelmed and excused himself, saying he wasn’t feeling too well. With un-safe steps he made his way downstairs, passing all the staring guests without paying much attention to them. There were even more eyes on him now, after they had seen him dance.

He really didn’t quite care about all the compliments he had gotten from Jinki’s friends. All he wanted was to finally get out of here. His head was spinning from the alcohol and the constant feeling of needing to earn money tonight. In whatever way.

There was one very simple way of getting a good sum of money tonight but Taemin was fighting himself. Did he really want to go back? Nothing good has come out of it in the past. And wasn’t one supposed to learn from past mistakes? But every time Taemin thought back to Kibum’s happy smiles this evening, he knew that he couldn’t let the other know about these bills – and therefore had to somehow manage paying them on his own.

It wasn’t as if he had never done it. He was dirty anyway, once more would not change anything. Maybe it was also partly the alcohol speaking, but it seemed to be the only option to get enough money in a short time.

Taemin walked through the streets until he arrived where he used to spend many nights. When he saw the neon signs of the brothel where he worked, a strange feeling spread in his insides. He was barely 16 back then.

Swallowing hard, he made his legs walk over to the entrance that was way too familiar. He had his head hung low, hair covering his face as he didn’t feel like talking to anyone yet. But since this was a place for actual, hired sex-workers to work he would need to get the permission to find a client with his old boss. This also included giving them half of what he earned. But because this was a place where only rich people came, that was still more than enough. It wouldn’t pay all the bills, but he knew from experience that this made much more money than a blowjob at the club.

When he reached the door, he entered, walking over to the desk where a very familiar face was standing.

“Dasol… long time no see” Taemin said when the beautiful girl with the short blonde hair had noticed the feline male walking towards here.

“Oh my gosh!” She almost shouted, not believing her eyes as to who was standing in front of her. “Someone shoot me if this isn’t Lee Taemin” Her warm smile made Taemin want to smile back at her but all he managed was a strange grimace which only partly reminded of a smile.

“I haven’t seen you around in ages. How long has it been? Three years?” Dasol was scanning the long-haired male from top to bottom

“More like five.” Taemin mumbled

“Shit, time really flies, doesn't it?”

Taemin nodded and thought about how to bring up what he was actually here for. But luckily Dasol guessed it first and he didn’t have to say it out loud himself.

“Are you here for a job?” She asked and Taemin nodded again.

“Is Junhwan around?”

“Yep, He’s upstairs, I’ll give him a call that you are here, I suppose you know the way.”

Walking up the familiar stairs, coated in a dark red carpet, being surrounded by the dark lighting brought up so many memories, but he kept himself going.

When he reached the black door on the third floor, he took a few moments to catch his breath and then knocked. After a few seconds, the door was unlocked, and the familiar face of his old boss welcomed him in his strange, expressionless way.

“I was expecting you, take a seat.” He gestured to Taemin to sit down on one of the leather chairs that the spacious office offered.

“Water?” He asked and Taemin nodded. “You look like you had enough to drink already.”

The long-haired male did not answer anything and just took the water without a word, slightly bowing his head.

“So, what can I do for you?” The middle-aged man asked and Taemin’s heart started beating even faster than it already did. This was his only chance; he couldn’t go back now.

“I was – uhm- I was thinking if, maybe, I could work here for three or four nights. I am having some financial troubles, and this was the only place I could think of.” While speaking he had his hair covering his face at all times, looking down at his hands.

There was a long silence which made Taemin look up, moving the hair out of his face. Junhwan was looking at him directly, taking in all of his pretty features.

“Now that is better. You still are as beautiful as you were five years ago.” A smirk played around the older male’s lips that disgusted Taemin to his core. But who was he to be picky?

“I can make you an offer. Work for me for ten nights, it is half/half like always. After those ten nights you are free to leave.”

“And you will guarantee to let me go? How can I believe that?” Taemin said, surprised at how good this offer sounded.

“I let you go once didn’t I?”

“Yes, and I also know that you regretted it. How many calls did I get, with you telling me you should have never let me go since I was ‘one of the best you have ever had’” Taemin said, imitating the older’s voice.

“Well, this is my offer, take it or leave.” Junhwan said, knowing that Taemin would have no choice but to accept.

A few minutes later, Junhwan had printed out a contract and added the fixed-term dates and Taemin’s personal information.

Taemin read it one time, not seeing anything fishy. It clearly stated the term of 10 nights, Thursday evenings as of Taemin’s wish, since it was the only evening he didn’t have any performances, and the half/half split of any earnings. With a shaking hand, Taemin signed the piece of paper.

“Alright, you’re good to go. Have fun.” Junhwan said, opening the door for the long-haired male who walked out as fast as possible without looking like he was rushing away from the older male.

Mentally he slapped himself several times while walking down the stairs. But then again, he thought of the money and forced himself to calm down. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t done this before.

A few minutes later, he was outside on the street, and in no time a white car stopped right in front of him. Taemin was not surprised, he was never one who waited in the cold for long. Thanks to his looks he never had to worry about getting clients. But the dark side of it was the jealousy from his ‘colleagues’ whom he was taking the good clients away from.

The window rolled down and Taemin got into the act he had not played out in so long, brushing his hair behind his ear, sticking out his ass when he bent over gracefully to talk to the man on the backseat.

“You are the most beautiful man I have ever seen. Are you new here?” a man in his early fifties asked and Taemin nodded. Clients always liked fresh blood. And in a way, it was true.

“How much” was the next question. Knowing that this man would go up quite far, judging from the car and the private driver, Taemin just named an amount, of which half was then handed to him through the window. The other half he would get after the job was done.

When he counted the bills, and was satisfied with the amount, he nodded and then the door of the white car was opened, Taemin slipping onto the backseat. By now all his nervousness was long gone and it all came naturally. His mind and body remembering the patterns and acting according to them. He kept on his poker face as the client’s hand was put on his thigh, moving toward his crotch slowly. It was normal men would start touching him in the car, nothing extraordinary. 

But then, something broke the pattern. Taemin just saw some crazy drunken guy blocking the way of the expensive white car, making the driver stop right after they had started moving.

“Take care of that man” The male next to Taemin said, addressing the driver who instantly opened the door and got out of the luxurious car.

The very moment that the driver had gotten out of the car, the drunken male walked past the front of the car on the other side, walking straight to the door where Taemin was seated, pulling it open aggressively.

“What the fuck?!” Taemin shouted as he was pulled out by a big warm hand around his wrist.

Before he could fight back, he was standing on the street, people from all sides watching what was happening by the white car. The client got out of the car in a rush. “What are you doing with my whore?” He shouted at the tall drunken male.

Taemin tried to free himself from the tight grip on his wrist but failed, he was too strong. But he managed to stop the guy from walking away with him by putting all his energy into standing still. The guy who was still pulling on his arm turned around when he noticed him resisting. The moment, Taemin could see his features for the first time, he vaguely recognised his face but couldn’t really put a finger on where he had seen him before. The smaller was confused for a second, but just a second later, anger got a hold of him.

“Let me go.” Taemin almost growled, glaring up into the other’s round eyes.

“Nah, forget it. I won’t let you go with that old man.” The taller said. The moment Taemin heard his voice he could finally put together the pieces. This was the rich, straight brat. Who did he think he was? The dancer was about to throw profanities at Min-something when he was interrupted by a third person. By now, Taemin’s client had reached them, followed closely by his driver.

“Who the hell are you and what are you doing with my whore?” The man said, taking Taemin’s other wrist in his hands.

“How much did you pay him?” The drunk male said, ignoring Taemin’s struggles. “I’ll pay you back double. Go get yourself another plaything.”

“Assholes” Taemin uttered under his breath as he realised that his weak and drunk body had no chance against either of the two men, and even less against both of them.

“Do I look like I need some Teenager’s money, boy?” he said, looking at the younger male provocatively.

While still holding Taemin’s wrist so tightly, it would probably leave a mark, the tall male reached to the back pocket of his pants, pulling out a leather purse. He held out his arm, handing his purse over to the old man.

“Take out as much as you want. He’s not going with you tonight.” Minho said, not leaving room for discussion.

Impressed by the thickness of the purse, the older man let go of Taemin’s wrist, making Taemin struggle even more against the hand who was still holding onto his other one. Maybe now he had a chance to get free.

“You are loaded son.” The man said, taking out a big bundle of checks, barely leaving any inside. “May I ask your name?” He asked, probably seeing a potential business partner in the tall male.

“Choi, Minho. Now get the fuck out of here.” Minho growled.

When the old male walked back to the car to get himself a new whore for the night, Minho pulled the still struggling Taemin after him into an alley, away from the watching eyes.

“You motherfucker will you let go of my fucking hand?!” Taemin was cursing and fighting the iron grip on his wrist until Minho stopped when they were out of everyone’s sight.

“I remember you.” The long-haired male then said. “You were at the club - 'straight guy'.” He spat on the floor.

Minho then finally let go of Taemin’s wrist, allowing the younger’s other hand to massage the sore spot. And the next moment slap him across the face hard, so hard that the tall male hissed in pain and kept his head turned to the side after the strong impact. His eyes were closed.

“Who do you think you are, fucker?” The dancer cursed, watching how Minho’s pained expression vanished from his face. “What the fuck do you think you are doing?!” Taemin shouted angrily at the tall male and didn’t even let him answer his questions. “Oh wait, I know what you are here for, but I don’t need a knight in shining armour that gets me out of this. So, for fucks sake, fuck off.” Taemin was angry, really angry, and despite being the stronger one here, Minho got intimidated by the raging male.

“I am not…” Minho started but was interrupted by the smaller male’s sharp voice once again.

“Yeah that’s what they all say.” Taemin said, laughing with a sad undertone. "Can't believe you got attached to me because of one - I mean what even was that?! that wasn't anywhere close to either a hand OR a blowjob."

“Will you hear me out?” The taller said, looking confused, as if he couldn’t quite grasp the situation, his drunken mind not following Taemin's words.

“I don’t really think I need to hear you out at all.” Taemin said, his head hurting from the shouting. “You didn’t really give me any reason to listen to what you want to say. But I want to know how you got here. Are you stalking me? And then who gave you the permission to interfere with my life, and even take away my client? What were you thinking?!? God dammit!!”

As Minho was listening to the younger speak, he started to realize how incredibly stupid and creepy he had behaved. Truth was, he hadn’t thought at all. That was the problem. His body had just acted on his own, without him having any control over his actions.

This was probably the most stupid thing he had ever done in his life, and he had done a lot of stupid things. First of all, Taemin was a stripper. Could it get worse? Yes, he seemed to also sell his body to horny old men, and most importantly: He was a man. Minho had gotten protective over a man.

“I am not stalking you” Minho immediately started to defend himself.

“So how did you get here huh? We are living in fucking Seoul, what are the chances of meeting by coincidence?”

“I uhm, you sort of were at my best friend’s birthday party.” Minho confessed and Taemin’s eyes grew wide

“Oh gosh no.” The younger shook his head. “Don’t tell me you are Jinki’s friend.” He almost pleaded and Minho just shrug his shoulders.

“Of course, you are. With my luck -” Taemin mumbled while massaging his temples, Minho could barely understand it.

“Ok, I really don’t care, but just keep away from me.” The long-haired male said shortly after, now loud enough for Minho to hear while taking a few crippled bills out of his pockets, shoving them into Minho’s big hands.

“I don’t like being in debt. This is all I have.” He said and without letting Minho say anything, he walked past him, touching the dirty wall every few steps to keep his balance.

“Where are you going?” Minho shouted after him and Taemin turned around, looking incredibly annoyed.

“What do you think boy? I need to earn some money tonight, and since you ruined my first job I gotta find another one." Taemin said "And don’t you dare follow me.” He added, glaring at the older male before turning around and walking away, his hands now in the pockets of his jeans jacket.

Minho was left standing there, baffled by the words and actions of the younger male. He had just saved him from selling his body to that old rich dude, shouldn’t he be thankful? But why was he going back? It did not make any sense.

Minho felt uncomfortable when thinking about Taemin being with another old man for the rest of the night. His drunk mind then made him jog after the other who was already back on the main street. Minho was fast and managed to catch Taemin’s already red wrist again. The latter turned around, anger all over his face, but before he could even start cursing, Minho spoke:

“Fine, you want to sell your body. Then sell it to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have a moment, leaving a comment would be more than appreciated!!


	9. Lube and Condoms

“Fine, you want to sell your body. Then sell it to me.”

With these simple, two sentences Taemin’s façade fell. He was speechless. This was the last thing he ever expected to hear Minho say. He tried not to be too surprised and put on his attitude, with a little more trouble this time. Of course, he would take Minho before another client ANY time. He just couldn’t admit it.

“What makes you believe you are better than any other client Huh?” he said, supressing the part of him that wanted to accept the offer.

“Well at least I am not triple your age.” Minho said, holding the sad excuse of three 10’000won bills out towards the long-haired male. “Take your money back”

Taemin did not move. The taller was right when he said that most of his clients were double or even triple his age - at least most of the time - and even if Taemin was used to it, he didn’t particularly like fucking middle-aged men and even less to be fucked by them. Should he take this opportunity of a decent fuck to get the money he needed, or look for some stranger to do the job? The only issue with Minho, was the bratty, awful personality that clearly came from always getting what he wants. If he took the offer, would he give him what he wanted?

There was a moment of regret in Minho’s eyes and Taemin already saw the latter’s hand move back, almost taking back the offer. That second Taemin realised that this was in fact the best way to break him - he obviously only made that offer out of pity he didn’t really want him to take it. Taemin would show him what he could do.

“Alright” Taemin said, as fast as possible, taking the money from Minho’s hands before he could pull out. “It is a deal then.” The younger smirked at Minho’s facial expression – he had been right. Minho was definitely already regretting his offer, probably asking himself why he said something like that.

After the words were out, Minho had no chance of taking them back. Therefore, Minho was incredibly happy when he saw that Taemin didn’t look like he would take the offer. But as he was about to take it back, he saw a spark in the dancer’s eyes as he reached for the money, agreeing to the deal.

Minho’s mind went blank, but his body was exited. Never had he paid for sex before. He was one of those who could have anyone they wanted without the need of paying for their services. The idea of hiring someone for sexual intercourse gave the whole situation a completely new feel. It made something that used to be so normal to him into something way more interesting than it had been in ages.

What happened next was mostly blurred, Minho just followed Taemin’s guidance. The latter seemed to know exactly what he was doing. Shortly after, they arrived at a hotel with a big and shiny entrance hall. With confident steps, Taemin walked to the desk.

“Two rooms for the night please” He said, confusing Minho who didn’t dare to ask why he booked two rooms.

When it was time for them to pay, Taemin looked at Minho, waiting for him to take out his purse.

“Uhm why?” Minho stuttered, earning him an annoyed look from the smaller male

“Oh, did you think I would pay for the room?” the dancer asked.

The taller hesitantly got his credit card, paying for the two rooms. When everything was payed for, they were handed key cards and walked to the elevator. When inside the elevator it was Taemin who spoke first.

“You don’t act like you have done this before.” He said, watching Minho’s face.

“Uhm… well… I never really uhm… needed to?” The taller was visibly uncomfortable which made Taemin laugh gently.

“We booked two rooms because they don’t like having sex workers here with their clients. So, to not raise any suspicion we usually book two rooms.” He explained

Minho nodded, that made sense. Why didn’t he think of that? When the elevator arrived at the seventh floor where their rooms were, Minho’s heart started beating faster and faster. He was slightly nervous. It was a feeling he wasn’t used to, especially not when it came to sex. It was something that normally came very natural to him. He almost didn’t recognise himself, not saying anything, he just silently followed Taemin to their room.

“I’ll make sure you get the most out of this money.” Taemin said when they had taken off their shoes and he was sitting on the bed.

“Ok then.” Minho said, slowly walking over.

“Just to be clear: no intercourse without a condom. The payment you have already gave me is to be given again at the end of the session. If any issues arrive and you would like a refund, you’ll have to get it over Erotes. The worker at the desk will determine whether your issues qualify or not.” Minho nodded, impressed how Taemin’s tone shifted to one so professional despite the alcohol he obviously had in his system

“You’ve never had sex with a man, am I right?” it wasn’t really a question since Taemin already knew the answer, but he had to ask it anyway.

Minho shook his head “No” He said.

“Alright, so I would propose that you are on top for now, which means you’ll be the one penetrating and not the other way around” Minho’s eyes went wide at the thought of him actually taking a dick. He would rather die. He had somehow gotten himself into this situation and it was bad enough that he had to lay with a man but when he was the one penetrating, he could at least try and imagine Taemin to be a woman.

“Minho?” Taemin said, waking the taller male who had to sit down in the chair next to the television. “Are you ok with that?” Minho’s throat was dry, so he just nodded again.

“Alright, do you have any preferences?”

“I guess I like my partners moaning. Lap dances maybe? I usually like to fuck a women’s breasts, but I guess that is not an option here.” Minho said raising an eyebrow.

The strange thing was that even though he always talked open about his sexual activities, sharing them with Taemin in this Situation was much more intimate. None of his partners had so openly asked him about what he liked, they just let him do as he wanted most of the time. If they didn’t, he usually cut the night short, getting off some way and then left without doing much. In and out… The girls who followed his wishes were more exciting.

When nothing more came from Minho, Taemin asked again:

“Nothing else? I am open for most things, I won’t have my eyes blindfolded, I don’t do fisting and most importantly I don’t let anyone pull my hair. Other than that, name it and you can have it. We don’t have any toys with us though so keep that in mind…”

Minho couldn’t believe what he was hearing. If those were the only three things banned, what were all the other options like? It was impossible to think fast enough and choose one of the many options he had.

“Anything?” Taemin asked

Minho was unsure. Would he like anything that went past what he was used to? Maybe he would? He was actually paying someone for sex, this was not something he was planning on doing again anytime soon if he wanted to try something, he would have to do it now. Maybe something that he knew his future hook-ups would most likely not want to do? So why not try out new waters?

“How about dirty talk? Any experience with that?” Minho said and Taemin understood, a smirk forming on his face.

“Who do you take me for? How should I call you then?” Taemin added and Minho blushed for the first time that night.

“Uhm…”

“I won’t judge, how do you like to be called in bed?”

“…”

“Sorry, I did not quite catch that.” Taemin said because Minho only mumbled his answer.

“Boy?” he asked into the room as if he wasn’t quite sure. This surprised Taemin. He was expecting something like “Daddy” maybe “Master” or “Sir” but not that.

“You are actually quite submissive, aren’t you?”

“I am not!” Minho said instantly, shooting up and looking into Taemin’s eyes, seeing the smirk on his face made the taller back away again. Maybe Taemin was right, maybe he liked it when someone talked down to him.

He had gone far enough already, there was no turning back anyway, so Minho simply agreed to let Taemin take care of what was going to happen.

“Strip” The smaller said, still sitting on the bed, watching Minho’s every move. The taller froze for a second before he started undressing himself under Taemin’s intense gaze.

He had never felt this exposed, this naked before. Minho’s big hands instantly moved over his crotch area when he removed his pants. His heart was still pounding and his whole body was hot in anticipation, alcohol running through his veins.

“Hands off.”

He did not know why, but Taemin’s voice made him move his hands instantly.

“That is better. Now let me see.” The younger stood up from the bed, now positioned in front of the Minho before he kneeled, his face at the height of the bump in Minho's boxers where his flaccid penis was still slumbering. The older hissed, when his boxers were jerked down, and the cold air hit his sensitive organ. His eyes closed immediately, not wanting to see a man’s face this close to his most valued part.

Meanwhile, Taemin inspected what he was going to work with tonight. Minho’s penis seemed to be about average in size, maybe a little over it but nothing special, as far as he could tell in its flaccid state. His black pubic hair was playing messily around it, fading into a small black trail that stopped at his navel. He would never tell Minho, but he had a thing for men who went natural. He had never found any liking in men who would cut, shave or even wax their pubic hair. He felt like it took away some of their masculinity, and Taemin loved himself a good man.

Not that he had ever had the chance to choose the men he slept with; it was simply a personal preference.

Grabbing the soft shaft, he watched Minho’s reaction to his touch.

“You’re pretty” Taemin said, making the taller open his eyes in shock. How did the younger dare to call him or even his dick pretty? He was handsome. Not pretty. It made him sound as if he were a girl.

“Who are you calling pretty here, Pretty boy?”

“Definitely not you.” Taemin mocked “Your penis here is what I call pretty.” And before Minho could get away from the younger’s touch and argue with him, the latter let go of the length to grab a condom from the inside of his jacket.

“Already? I thought I would get more foreplay for my money.” Minho asked, confused why Taemin already pulled out the condom before he was even hard.

“Wouldn’t want to catch any STD’s, right?”

“I guess not.” The older said, sad to already be confined. Girls usually didn’t care so much - or simply did not know that diseases could be transmitted by precum. As he was watching how Taemin’s trained hands put the condom on his dick he wondered how many times the other had done this already.

When it was properly put on, Taemin licked the crown of Minho’s ‘pretty’ dick. And instead of curses, a moan escaped Minho’s mouth

“You like it when I call you pretty.” Taemin smirked, now taking all of Minho’s tip in his mouth, playing around the soft organ with his skilled tongue, sucking on its soft skin through the latex when the opportunity arose.

“I don’t ahhh” Minho tried to argue but his moans said otherwise. Only god knows how many mouths he has had down there but there was not a single one that could compare to what Taemin was doing. Minho shouldn’t be surprised, Taemin was a professional after all, but he was completely hard just a minute after Taemin had started when it usually took the women up to five to have him ready like this.

When Taemin removed his soft lips from Minho’s member, the taller’s hips jerked upwards, in need for more.

“Please” Minho begged, discarding all of his pride in exactly that moment and Taemin gave him what he wanted. And it was completely worth throwing away any pride he had. Taemin’s mouth felt like heaven, the way his tongue flipped along his hot flesh gave him chills. It was a constant change from hard and soft licks and Taemin sucked at the perfect moments, hollowing his cheeks while taking the hard member deeper, the tip of it hitting the back of his throat, just to move away again, sucking on only the head.

But the biggest difference was that not only his mouth was at work, but while one hand was holding onto the base of the condom, the fingers of his other hand were cupping and massaging his balls in irregular motions, adding something to the mix of sensations he hadn’t experienced much before. And if he did, the girls’ attempts to pleasure his testicles definitely weren’t done with this kind of finesse. Only another man could know so exactly what parts had to be stimulated how. To think that Taemin was doing this while being completely buzzed made Minho wonder about how this would feel when he was sober.

“Look boy, now it’s even prettier than before!” Taemin said after taking his mouth off the other’s member who was now curved upwards, laying erect against Minho’s well-toned abdomen filling out the condom properly. It was glistening in the light because of Taemin’s saliva and the latex. This comment made Minho groan while he used all his willpower to look at the ceiling and not his manhood.

“You should look at it boy.” Taemin said, teasingly while caressing the hot organ gently with one of his hands., pressing it slightly against the taller’s toned abs as he rubbed along the underside.

“It looks really pretty, covered in my saliva.” Taemin’s words made Minho’s whole body burn up in flames, his cheeks were bright red and he did not make the slightest move to do as he was told. His eyes were shut tightly, not wanting to destroy the image of a beautiful lady down at his private parts. He was afraid his erection would go down when he saw the man down there.

Taemin just smirked at the stiff male who still tried not to give himself to him. The taller didn’t seem to be able to come to terms with the fact that he was intimate with another guy. But Taemin trusted his skills and knew that the other would come around sooner or later. So, he kept doing what he had been doing.

The younger’s left hand was keeping the hard flesh standing straight while his tongue was lazily lapping all over the tasteless rubber, sometimes moving down to Minho’s testicles where he could finally taste the musky scent Minho owned. By now, the taller had his back arched, his cock pulsating from the blood which was flowing south.

“You ahhhh-re sooo good” without having any control over it a long moan escaped Minho’s lips. He was so close already and they didn’t even really start. As soon as Minho uttered these words, Taemin knew that the older had given in. His goal was achieved, and he let go of the hard manhood, making it slap onto Minho’s firm abs.

“Now we are talking.” He said, standing up and removing his jacket and turtleneck, leaving him in his thin, white shirt and the black leather pants.

Minho had opened his eyes by now, moving back on the bed so he was leaning against the wall behind it. His hand had moved to his very hard member slowly but Taemin noticed.

“Don’t touch yourself boy, you are paying me to do that.”

Before the long-haired male put his jacket aside, he took out a small bag, putting it onto the chair next to the bed.

The taller male was watching Taemin’s behind hungrily, admiring the way his tight leather pants fitted perfectly around the firm globes. He really wanted to see the other undress. And before he could stop the thought, it already made its way to Taemin’s ears.

“Can you strip for me?”

Minho’s request made Taemin smirk, it was exactly what he was planning to do next.

“That’s what I am here for, whatever you want.” The long-haired male said, the smirk not leaving his face.

Moving his hand to the hem of his shirt, he slowly started pulling it up while his other hand ran over the already exposed skin. When about half of his upper body was uncovered, the perky nipples just showing for a second, he let go of the fabric again, making the shirt fall back down to cover all of his beautifully toned body. Seeing the disappointment on Minho’s face was wonderful and Taemin decided he couldn’t get enough of the teasing, pulling the white shirt over his head, only to turn around a second after, not letting the sitting male see his chest. He looked over his shoulders and shook his head to get his hair to tickle his back. With his hands, he touched his shoulders, caressing his own skin for a few moments before turning back around in one swift motion, leaving his torso bare for Minho to stare at. And that was exactly what the other was doing.

Minho had seen Taemin’s body before, on stage from far away and once while he was high when they played games with the other dancers. Being up close to this gorgeous man’s body again was more intense now that he wasn’t high. Back then he hadn’t been tempted to look at him properly, his brain had enough to do registering everything else. He had seen the tribal tattoo on his arm and the owl on Taemin’s chest before, of course, but now he was able to see the incredible detail on the artwork. And to his surprise he could make out yet another tattoo he did not notice before. The very thin, vertical line that started on his neck and went on until it met with Taemin’s collarbone, meeting a horizontal line which completed the image of a cross.

Taemin, who saw Minho’s eyes fixed on his upper body started moving his hands along his hot skin, always paying extra attention to his nipples while moving his hips as if he was on stage. He giggled slightly at the taller’s focused gaze – it seemed as if he needed so much concentration to properly see everything, his glossy eyes almost doggedly fixating on different parts of Taemin’s body every few seconds, as if he couldn’t decide where to look.

Several times during Taemin’s 'performance', Minho’s hands were trying to touch his hard manhood but whenever his hand got closer, Taemin stopped moving and shook his head. The taller was so close to getting up and touching Taemin, getting the long-haired male’s pants off the other’s body. But shortly before he reached his limit of his self-control, as if Taemin knew, Taemin’s hands moved further down, right into his tight leather pants without any hesitation.

Minho could see the younger’s hand move beneath the tight fabric, touching his penis while he was watching Minho’s hungry gaze on his private parts.

“You like what you see?” Taemin said, still moving the hand inside his pants, his mouth slightly parted, showing Minho how good it felt.

“I don’t see shit” Minho almost growled, the dominant side of him coming through. He was frustrated and wanted Taemin to finally do what he was payed for. He really wanted to see what the younger was packing. Ever since he had seen the outline of it before, when Taemin had removed his shirt, he couldn’t wait to have the leather pants drop.

“Do you want to?” Taemin teased, taking his hand out of his pants after positioning his bulge upwards, smirking at the needy male knowingly. Just a few seconds after, he opened the button and pulled the black fabric down just slightly, moving his hips sensually while doing so. The leather pants were hanging incredibly low now, just barely showing his privates, showing parts of his pubic hair and the very top of his dick. The reddish crown of the decently sized penis was squished by the hem of his leather pants before he pulled them down further. 

Both of Taemin’s hands were on the sides of his pants, thumbs underneath the fabric, pulling them down slowly while he was rolling his body sensually. Bit by bit he revealed his whole length, Minho admiring the darker skin of it. To his surprise his dick wasn’t as pale as expected. The skin was of a darker, warmer tone than the rest of his body and Minho watched with wide eyes, not to miss even a second of the show.

The way Taemin’s body moved was pure bliss to him. It had been ever since he had first seen him dance, but having him move his sensual body just for him was a completely different story. His dick was twitching just from the sight at the other end of the bed where Taemin had finally pulled his pants down to his knees, freeing his member from the tight fabric. Of course, he was not wearing any underwear.

Taking in every inch of Taemin’s private part, Minho had to admit that the other male seemed to be slightly bigger than himself, at least in his flaccid state. He felt slightly disappointed to see that the other’s penis wasn't erected at all. Did he not have any appeal to the younger male?

“Why aren’t you erect?” Minho asked, his self-esteem hurt.

“Have you done anything to make me hard? No, so why would I be?” Taemin gave back as he got rid of his pants completely.

“Am I not hot enough for you?”

“You want to make me hard boy? Only being hot will not wake junior.” He giggled, playing with his dick a little before crossing his arms behind his head.

The taller hesitated for a few seconds and Taemin just kept still, his hands behind his back as he waited for Minho to dare moving closer.

“You want to try?” Taemin asked and raised an eyebrow.

“How?”

“Seriously? You ask me how to please a man? Have you never masturbated? Do what you like if you really want me hard as well. The condoms are in the small bag there.” The dancer pointed at the bag on the chair next to the bed.

Ever so slowly, Minho moved over to the edge of the bed, involuntarily also coming closer to the naked male. He grabbed the bag and opened it. He already had suspicions of what the contents were but he was surprised either way about the choice he had. There were a handful of different sizes and tastes, including a bottle of water-based lube.

“Akamoto 003” Taemin said, answering Minho’s unspoken question.

“Thanks.” With shaking hands, the straight male who usually didn’t care what condom he used searched until he found the one Taemin was talking about. When he found it, he put the bag aside again, now facing the dancer. He was way too close. Many thoughts clouded his vision. Could he really do this? Approach a man like this? Didn’t that make him gay?

Maybe he was bisexual? That could work? Minho just knew that he really wanted to experience this. He was too competitive not to try.

Taemin was still standing there his crotch right in front of Minho's face while his arms were crossed. The long-haired male could not but find Minho’s hesitance cute. The way he was eyeing his member as if he had never seen another male’s dick up close, the way his hands were opening the silver packaging before slowly coming closer, unsure of how to approach putting a condom on his flaccid dick.

Taemin held back an ‘are you sure you are not a virgin’? comment and let Minho take his time. After all he was paying for his services and not the other way around, so whatever Minho wanted, was his command. When Minho’s big hand finally met with his flaccid member, Taemin decided to encourage the taller male by moaning at his touch. His clients usually loved it when he pretended to be sensitive and also, he had said that he liked his partners to moan. 

Truth was, a touch like this could hardly make him moan anymore. But Minho’s reaction was more than worth it. The taller looked up at the long-haired male’s face, and his expression got determined the moment he saw Taemin’s half lidded eyes and his slightly gaping mouth.

Nevertheless, it needed Taemin to put the condom on.

“Can you put it on?” Minho asked, holding out the condom for Taemin to take – which the latter did. It was a matter of seconds before it was put in place, loosely fitting around the soft manhood. Taemin had to hold it to keep it from slipping and gestured Minho to do whatever he desired.

Feeling a wet tongue giving his flaccid dick experimenting licks, surprised Taemin, he was not used to get blowjobs by customers. Honestly, he had expected Minho to use his hands not approach him the way he had done to him. There was Minho, now taking the tip of his dick into his gorgeous mouth. The taller tried to ignore the strange, unfamiliar taste of the condom that spread inside his mouth and attempted to imitate the movements Taemin’s tongue had made before.

He had never given anyone a blowjob and it felt strange. Strange, but he kind of liked it, he liked how heavy Taemin’s member felt in his mouth and decided to take it further, hollowing his cheeks the way Taemin had, sucking on his member.

This time Taemin didn’t have to fake a moan. His member started to wake inside the heat of Minho’s mouth, who tried to recreate what Taemin had done to his own earlier. Knowing that he was the first one Minho was doing this too, made him feel somehow proud, and the whole situation got much more interesting.

The taller was definitely inexperienced, his movements were messy, and he was still breathing through his mouth, making it hard to keep it closed around the hot flesh.

“You have to breathe through your nose” Taemin said, giving the older advice from time to time.

By now Taemin’s erection had almost grown to full size filling out the condom so it didn’t have to be held anymore. Taemin turned out to be quite the grower, making it impossible for Minho to take even half of it in his mouth. But the taller seemed to be determined and Taemin felt him trying to take more and more inside. When he was halfway inside, his tip meeting with Minho’s throat, the taller choked and instantly moved off the erection.

“Easy boy.” Taemin said “You don’t have to do this.” He pushed the teary eyed and still coughing male back, making him lie down onto the bed. “After all I am here to please you, not the other way around.” With these words, Taemin turned around, getting the bag, which he had put there earlier, from the chair.

“Lube” Taemin said, opening the zipper and taking out a bottle of colourless liquid.

“Do you always carry that bag with you?!” Minho asked, he had wondered ever since he opened it.

“Have you forgotten that this is my job? And I really hope you carry that shit around as well. If you don’t you are even more of a douche than I thought.” Taemin said before he could stop himself from insulting a client. People not using protection was the most stupid thing one could do. Even more in this field of work. Catch something once and you can never work again.

“I uh…” Minho started but was silenced by the cold liquid that was poured onto his hot erection. The lube was followed by Taemin’s skilled hands that started jerking the taller off, spreading the sticky liquid all over.

Minho’s back was arching, his hips thrusting into Taemin’s hand desperate for more friction. Just before Minho thought his orgasm was rolling over him, the younger noticed, and removed his hand off the taller’s member, making the latter thrust into plain air, groaning in frustration.

“You fucking tease” Minho cursed.

“You like it don’t you?” Taemin said, gently caressing Minho’s member.

“I don- ahhhhhh” Minho started but was interrupted by a slap on his hard manhood which had him wincing in pain and moaning at the same time.

“Don’t lie to me. I know you like it boy. I can read people well in bed. Men are so obvious.” Slapping the hot flesh, a second time, now only getting a moan. “See, you like it when I am rough, you like being dominated.”

“HNGGG” Minho’s eyes closed when Taemin started stroking his dick again. Pleasure was only short because another slap followed shortly after.

“Tell me you love it. Tell me you love being toyed with.” Taemin had no idea what happened to him. He was getting way too much into this. Was it the alcohol? Was it the fact that he finally found someone who seemed to enjoy what he liked? It didn’t matter because he couldn’t stop.

Minho’s mind was a mess. He knew he shouldn’t like being treated this way, but Taemin’s words and his rough hands were driving him insane. His whole body was pulsing in pleasure and excitement of being dominated by another man. Bisexual.

“I- I” He started with an unsteady voice. “I love it”

“That’s a good boy. Time to get your reward.” Taemin said, taking his hands off Minho’s member to get another condom. The previous one could be damaged from the rough treatment and Taemin didn’t want to have a reason to be sorry. With one hand he pulled the used one off Minho’s member, the latter moaning when Taemin’s hand came in contact with his bare skin.

“Want me to put it on you?” The younger asked and Minho just nodded, watching how the smaller’s slick fingers opened the plastic, taking the condom out.

The dancer then sat on the bed right next to Minho, once again taking the taller’s members in his hand, carefully placing the condom on the head of it, rolling it down with a few strong strokes. When it was settled securely at the base of Minho’s penis, Taemin removed his hands.

“Do you want to prepare me, or should I do it?”

“Prepare what?” Minho asked and Taemin was mentally slapping the guy.

“You have no clue about how gay sex works do you?”

“Why in the world would I?” Minho defended himself, eyes hungrily watching Taemin grab the lube.

“Did you ever do anal with a woman?”

“Only twice, most of them don’t let me.”

“Alright so it is basically the same thing. You need to stretch it before burying your freaking dick inside. Otherwise it is incredibly painful.” Taemin said, pouring some lube onto his hands.

Minho was confused. Both women that had allowed him to go anal had not done anything Taemin was speaking of.

“But I didn’t have to do that with the women…”

“Well then, you either are a jerk who does not realize when your partner is in pain, or the girls were used to getting penetrated in their asses.”

“Oh, and you are not used to having your ass penetrated? You are a freaking prostitute.” Minho said, angry at the younger’s accusation.

“You did not just say that.” Taemin growled, making Minho regret what he said instantly.


	10. Gay Sex 101

“Oh, and you are not used to having your ass penetrated? You are a freaking prostitute.” Minho said, angry at the younger’s accusation.

“You did not just say that.” Taemin growled, making Minho regret what he said instantly. Taemin looked hurt and angry at the same time and before the younger could say anything more, Minho apologized.

“I am sorry, I- I really didn’t mean to uhm say that”

“You got a lot to learn, boy…” Taemin sighed “After all, you are someone who pays for a prostitute’s service and you don’t even know how to treat them properly. I am disappointed.”

Minho was about to answer, but this time, the younger was faster: “Pull yourself together. I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.”

“I am willing to learn.” Minho then spoke.

Taemin nodded and walked over to the head of the bed, sitting on the cushion, his naked back pressing against the wall. Minho turned around, sitting on the bed with his condom covered dick proudly standing between his legs, giving it gentle strokes from time to time.

“Alright, come closer” Taemin said, opening the bottle of lube, pouring some onto his fingers and then grabbing one of Minho’s big ones, coating his fingers in colourless liquid.

“So now,” Taemin moved his hips up for Minho to get a good view of his pink hole. “It’s best if you hold up my legs with one hand and use the other to stretch me.”

Minho did as he was told, holding up one of the dancer’s toned legs, granting an even better view of the puckered entrance. With his slick hand he got closer to the other’s rim, following his instincts.

“Yes, exactly like that, now just rub it a few times to spread some lube and then gently put one finger in.” Taemin was observing Minho’s actions closely, smirking when Minho’s facial expressions changed as soon as he touched the other’s hole.

It was easy to tell that Minho was nervous, so Taemin tried to calm him down. “Good boy. Now get inside of me.” He said, moving his hips towards the taller’s finger, which was still circling the ring of muscles, not daring to enter the warmth of Taemin’s body.

“AHHH” Taemin let a slightly overexaggerated moan pass his lips to encourage the older. It worked. After a short gaze to Taemin’s face, only to see the other’s closed eyes, Minho pushed his thick finger inside deeper and then started to move in and out, giving the smaller the friction he wanted.

“Yes please, fill me boy.” The long-haired male moaned, making Minho’s hard manhood twitch. He had not expected Taemin to be this vocal in bed. After being surprised the first moment, he remembered that he had told the dancer he liked loud moans and the excitement tuned down a little. Taemin was just doing his job…

“Common give me another one of your thick fingers. They fill me so good.”

Minho did not waste a second and added another finger right away. Even though he wished for the other to really mean what he said, Minho enjoyed hearing these words spoken by Taemin. It felt so good to see the dancer squirming beneath his touch.

“Fuck yes!” Taemin shouted and then bit on his lip. He didn’t want that to come out this loudly, but Minho’s fingers were actually doing a good job.

“Now scissor them.” Taemin ordered, and the taller did as he was told, spread his fingers slightly, working the tight hole open.

A few minutes later, after adding more lube, Taemin told Minho to add a third one, hissing when it entered the stretched entrance. It had been a while since he had taken it in the ass.

“Exactly like that.” Taemin moaned “You are doing great” With the professional’s encouraging words, Minho got more confident, pumping his fingers in and out of Taemin’s warm hole which sucked him in hungrily, making wet noises whenever he entered it.

By now, Taemin wasn’t faking every single moan anymore. The taller’s long strong fingers felt good inside of him. Even though Minho did not know about the prostate as a source of pleasure, and therefore did not try to stimulate it, the friction of the rough hands was wonderful to feel against his sensitive insides.

Looking at Minho’s face, the younger could see the fascination in his eyes. Minho obviously loved to see his fingers moving in and out of the younger’s ass. By now, Taemin’s dick was standing just as proudly against his torso as Minho’s was and the pleasure got unsatisfying as Minho’s fingers never even grazed Taemin’s prostate. So, the smaller started moving his hips, trying to align Minho’s fingers with it.

Surprised at Taemin’s sudden movements, the taller stopped moving his hands only to get an evil gaze from the other. So, he kept pumping in and out, squelching noises and Taemin’s moans filling the room.

“SHIT” Taemin screamed when Minho’s fingers finally met his prostate. The sudden loud scream made the taller almost jump, ripping his fingers out of Taemin’s slick ass.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asked, afraid of hurting the younger.

“Oh HELL NO.” Taemin said, panting from all the pleasure this one touch had sent through his whole body. “You did more than good.”

“What was that?”

“You finally hit the prostate. Before you ask, think of it as the male G-Spot. I mean I don’t have to explain to you that it is a place with many, I mean really, a ton of nerve endings. You probably noticed at the urologist. In that context the sensation is mostly unpleasant but while sex.” Taemin smirked and moaned as if he was eating something delicious. “The feeling is amazing It is what you will try to hit later, so maybe try to remember where it is.” Taemin lectured, feeling ridiculous that he had to explain this basic thing to one of his customers.

“Give me your hand” Taemin said, holding out his own and Minho of course did as he was told. Guiding the taller’s big hand back to his hole, the younger immediately inserted the digit with no problem as he was stretched out enough for now.

“I am teaching you gay-sex-101 here.” Taemin smirked while Minho blushed a little. Now that the rush was gone, having his finger buried in another guys asshole was very uncomfortable but the younger didn’t seem to mind at all.

“You see, you don’t need to go in deep to find it. Curl your finger upwards slightly” Taemin said, guiding Minho’s finger directly to his sweet spot.

”OHHH yes, exactly there” He moaned when the digit was pressed exactly onto his prostate. When his breathing had settled again, he continued. ”When your partner is on their back, you need to thrust slightly upwards pressing against the upper wall, which is where the prostate is settled. Taking your partner from the back makes it harder to meet the spot but with a little training it is manageable.”

Minho was listening to everything Taemin said, he did not know why but he had the feeling that knowing this would be useful in the future and therefore tried his best to remember all of it, including the exact spot where Taemin’s prostate was settled, If meeting that spot meant getting Taemin to moan like that, he would definitely want to find it on his own again. Because that definitely hadn’t been a fake moan.

The younger pulled out Minho’s hand, making his hole clench around air for a second.

“Do you have any more questions?” Taemin asked and the other shook his head.

“Good, then lie down.” The long-haired male got on his knees, moving away from the spot he has been lying on, leaving the space to Minho who did as he was told.

“I’ll start off with riding you and you can take over later if you want, and if not, just let me do the work. Alright?” Another nod.

Taemin grabbed the bottle of lube while speaking, spreading a good amount on his hands. “Oh, and before I forget: If I do anything you don’t like, and you want me to stop, say ‘Owl’. It is your safe word. I don't think you will need it tonight, but I will not stop when you just ask me to stop. So, if you really are uncomfortable with something say the safe word.”

Minho’s whole body heated up at this comment. Would he really be needing a safe word? What was the other planning to do with him? Not knowing what was going to happen was just as frightening as it was arousing. All Minho could do at that moment was nod again, but that didn’t seem to be enough for Taemin.

“Did you understand? Answer me boy” The dominant side of Taemin was back and Minho knew he was not joking anymore.

“Yes, I understand” his agreement was followed by a long moan when the younger finally payed some attention to his dick again. His hand was moving up and down Minho’s length, spreading the liquid all over the condom.

“You have such a beautiful dick, I cannot wait to put it inside of me, have you spreading my walls with your hard wood” Taemin said, using the rest of the lube that still covered his hand to lube up his hole before settling above Minho’s cock. The latter was blushing hard from Taemin’s dirty comment. No one had ever talked to him like that. And Taemin did it as if it was the most natural thing on earth.

Minho’s dick in one hand, his other on the bed to keep his balance, Taemin rubbed the slick tip of the hard length on his hole, making Minho moan just from this little friction.

“You are already moaning like a bad little boy and did not even enter my hot hole. You are such a desperate one.” The younger teased, before slowly going down on Minho’s penis. It was only the head inside, but both were already moaning. Minho because he had never felt anything that could compare to this and Taemin because it had been quite a while since he had last taken it in the ass and he wasn’t used to it anymore.

“Oh gosh Taemin” Minho moaned, looking up at the long-haired male with half-lidded eyes. “That feels so good.”

Closing his eyes, Taemin went further down, taking all of Minho inside. He had some troubles with balance due to the amount of alcohol in his blood but somehow he managed to sit down, breathing heavily. Yes, his head had been clouded ever since they entered the hotel but the hormones in his system intensified the drunken feeling.

“Of course – ahhh – Of course it does.” The younger said between breaths. “I know what I am doing after all.”

Minho had his head thrown back; his back arched while he tried to get deeper inside of the delicious warmth.

While Taemin was settled on Minho’s crotch, the taller's member deeply buried inside of him, the younger took a short break to get his trembling legs to calm down.

“Move. Please move.” Minho begged, he couldn’t wait any longer, he needed that friction right now.

“Why are you begging Minho, you are paying for me, order me to move.” A grin spread on the youngers face.

“Move.” The taller said and Taemin did as he was told. His movements weren’t as smooth and controlled as they usually were, the alcohol making it difficult to keep balance and keep a steady rhythm but Minho didn’t seem to notice.

“That’s my boy.” Taemin said and lifted himself off Minho’s member while holding onto the bottom of the condom to make sure it is tight enough to not roll back up when he lifted of. It stayed where it had to be and Taemin moved back down again, taking every inch of it so well.

With every move, the pauses got shorter and soon Taemin was bouncing up and down Minho’s dick in an impressively fast pace, not showing any sign of tired legs except for the heavy breathing. The taller felt wonderful. Taemin was taking his length better than anyone before. None of his previous partners had this much stamina, they were tired after just few minutes and Taemin had been going on for what felt like an eternity, making Minho move his hips up to meet the long-haired male’s movements.

“Can I touch you?” Minho managed to say between moans and made Taemin chuckle. It was strange to be asked when usually the people he slept with were roaming his body with their hands as if it was theirs – which it technically was, for the time being as they had paid for his body – but he still hated it.

“Sure” Taemin said and Minho’s hands shot up at exactly that seconds, touching the younger’s soft skin, caressing it gently, another thing Taemin wasn’t quite used to.

While Minho was exploring Taemin’s flat chest with wonder, paying extra attention to the owl that circled his nipple, the long-haired male stopped moving and sat down onto Minho’s crotch, now on his knees, completely taking the hard member inside. He stayed like that, unmoving, while he let the taller explore his torso as much as he wanted.

Minho was strangely attracted by the lack of boobs. He loved breasts but there was something about the flat chest he was currently touching that fascinated him. There barely was anything to grab, but the little that was there was even more satisfying to rub. He was so captivated by the new experience that he only noticed that Taemin hadn’t been moving when he took up his rhythm again now moving his hips in a circular motion, giving Minho a new kind of sensation. Both of Taemin’s hands were on the taller’s built chest now, his back arched gracefully while Minho’s big hands settled on his toned thighs.

Taemin's long-hair was flowing with the movement of his body, covering his face most of the time - much to Minho’s disappointment. He wanted to see the younger’s face.

“Get your ahhh hair out of the way.” Minho said firmly, making Taemin remove his hands of his chest while still moving his hips, back and forth now. Both were heavily breathing.

“As you like” The long-haired male spoke and got the hairband he had on his wrist, bringing his hands up to his hair to put it up into a ponytail. While he was doing so, he never stopped moving on Minho’s dick. One time he almost lost his balance but managed to catch himself with one arm holding himself up on Minho’s chest before going back up to tie the hairband properly.

Taemin with his hands held up, was a wonderful view that was presented to Minho: Taemin’s body was stretched, the dancer’s clearly visible muscles contracting underneath the sweat covered, inked skin with every move he made. The crown of his curved penis was glistening with precum and standing proudly against his torso while his balls were pressed against Minho’s skin.

The sight was so beautiful that the taller touched Taemin’s penis gently at first and then jerking it off while he tried to put his hair up. A surprised moan escaped Taemin’s lips and his hands stopped working for a second before finishing up the hairdo.

His hair now in a high ponytail, Taemin took his hands back down. The younger noticed the disappointed look in Minho’s eyes when he did so and decided to pinch the taller’s nipples instead. His buds seemed to be very sensitive, just the slight pinching made Minho breath irregularly, a few throaty moans making it to Taemin’s ears. The moans got longer the stronger Taemin’s pinches got.

It was almost painful to have the long-haired male violating his sensitive nipples but at the same time it was amazing. The pain just intensified the pleasure he got from downstairs where Taemin was clenching onto his hard manhood, just slowly moving up and down.

As much as Minho was impressed with how long Taemin managed to go without a break, he felt the need to take over, he didn’t know why but he didn’t want the younger to use up all his energy. So, he grabbed Taemin’s hips, getting him to stop moving.

“What’s the matter?” Taemin asked, completely out of breath, lips parted to get enough oxygen into his system.

“I’ll take over. You are tired” The taller said, confusing Taemin once again. Why did he care about whether he was tired or not? But Minho was serious, lifting Taemin off his length which then fell out of his hole, slapping on the taller’s abs, making the long-haired male moan at the sudden emptiness.

Before Taemin could say anything, Minho had turned him around, making him lie on his back, spreading his legs right away. He had payed attention to the lesson earlier, so he felt confident that he would be able to meet the spot that made Taemin moan in the most beautiful, uncontrolled way.

As soon as he had the younger in the position that he wanted him in, He aligned his hard member with Taemin’s hole again, entering him slowly while guiding his dick slightly upwards. Taemin instantly knew what the older was trying and smirked. Minho was a good student. He had to admit that. And just shortly after, the taller hit his prostate, making Taemin moan and his body shiver in pleasure.

“Found it” Minho said, proud of his newly learned skills. Wanting more of Taemin’s beautiful moans, he pulled out again and started thrusting in to meet the spot again. This was something he was confident in. No girl had ever complained about his skills in bed. Like Taemin had done before, he tried to build up a steady rhythm, hitting Taemin’s prostate dead on almost every single time. It wasn’t as clean as usual, the alcohol making it harder to keep up the pace but it was good enough.

To get even better access to Taemin’s hole, Minho tried to pull up the other’s legs and to his surprise Taemin seemed to have guessed what he wanted to do. He gracefully folded himself in half, wrapping his arms around his knees to keep the legs out of the way. His eyes heavily lidded, his hard member angry and red against his stomach.

Minho was surprised for a second at how flexible the younger male was, but then again, he should have known, the other was a dancer after all.

“Show me what you can do boy.” Taemin challenged and Minho started moving again instantly. The room was filled with the slapping of Minho’s balls against the dancer’s ass, Taemin’s muffled moans and the taller’s low, breathless grunts.

Taemin was impressed, when it came to this, the taller really knew what he was doing. His thrusts were strong but not rough and kept a steady rhythm mostly, sometimes speeding up or slowing down whenever he was close to orgasm. This way they were going much longer than Taemin had expected. He wasn’t complaining at all. For the first time in ages, sex actually felt good. He did not have to fake moans anymore.

Minho’s stamina was amazing, but even he got tired after a few minutes of steady thrusts. Taemin noticed and let go of his legs, making them rest on Minho’s shoulders, his hands reaching for Minho’s ass to support the taller’s thrusts.

“You are doing amazing.” Taemin said, patting the round globes lovingly which made Minho go insane, using his remaining strength to speed up again.

“I am so close.” It was barely a whisper between heavy breathing but Taemin understood.

“Common boy spill it. Fill me with your cum!”

A few rapid, shallow thrusts later and, with a low grunt, Minho buried his dick completely inside, pressing his balls against Taemin’s crack. The hot length was twitching while it spilled the white into the condom.

Minho’s body went limp shortly after, all his energy spent. Feeling the heavy weight of the taller male on his own body, Taemin tried to wiggle away from Minho. With one hand, he took a hold of Minho’s base, keeping the condom in its place while pulling off the hot length. With his other hand he pushed the heavy body away.

Noticing the struggling male beneath him, Minho held himself up with his arms, letting the younger get away. This was the most intense orgasm he had ever had and coming down from it took longer than he expected. His head was still clouded, and he just partly made note of Taemin taking off the condom.

“I guess it is time for me to leave” Taemin then said with a look to the clock on the wall, the filled condom in his hand. Minho had turned around, watching him with half lidded eyes. When Minho did not answer, Taemin got up from the bed, walking over to the taller’s jacket.

“I’ll just take my money then.”

“Su-Sure” Minho said. Taemin’s back looked beautiful, the black line on his spine, which had fascinated him back in the club as well, was still as beautiful, giving the impression of Taemin’s body being split in half.

The long-haired male took out the money and put it in his own jacket.

Minho was almost dozing away when Taemin turned around and he saw the younger’s member still standing proudly and angry red against his toned stomach. How could he forget about that?

“I should -” He started with a look at Taemin’s dick but Taemin interrupted him.

“You should sleep.” He said, walking over to the bathroom - to throw the condom away, Minho guessed, but Taemin closed the door after him, locking it, confusing the older male who was barely able to keep his eyes focused.

After Taemin threw the used condoms into the trash by the side of the toilet, he grabbed his erection, rubbing it fast. It has been long since anyone had brought him this close to an orgasm. If Minho would have kept going just a minute longer, he would have actually reached it. But in the end clients don’t care about a prostitute like him.

Just a few strokes later, he ejaculated into his hands. He cleaned all the cum off his skin and then took care of his lubed-up entrance, getting most of the slick substance off. When he was done cleaning his body, he felt like he would break down any second. After the adrenalin drained away, he realized how spent he actually was. All his energy was gone. His head was dizzy, and his legs were struggling to keep up his weight. It was right at that moment, when Taemin regretted not eating the day before. His whole body was weak. He just wanted to sleep.

The long-haired male barely reached the bed and fell on it as soon as he did. Minho was already sleeping on the other side of the bed, still naked. And despite the big rule of never staying after a job, Taemin fell asleep right next to the taller, who closed his strong arms around the younger's frame protectively in his sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyho how are y'all?   
> Here is the newest chapter, I hope you like it! And if you do, a comment would be really nice (?)


	11. Thursday Nights

When Taemin stirred, he felt hot, strong arms around his waist and suddenly he was wide awake. In panic, he moved away from the tight grip. With wide eyes he looked at the completely naked man that was lying on the dirty bed sheets of the hotel he used to spend many nights at. Minho was still deep asleep, only moving slightly at the loss of warmth, turning himself around into a foetal position.

As the memories of last night came back, Taemin held his buzzing head and a tear escaped his eye. What had driven him to sell his body, he had promised himself not to ever do it again. And here he was: with a headache and a painful sensation in his anus. Great. Just great. How was he going to explain all of this to Kibum?

That was something to worry about later. He had to get out of here first. After neatly folding his customer's clothes, the long-haired male put on his own in a hurry, then left the hotel, almost running through the corridors. The money in his jacket was heavy, reminding him of the fact that he had to bring half of his earnings back to his “employer”. Several times on the way, Taemin almost broke down crying in an ally. But he could mostly hold it back, only a few tears escaping his eyes.

There were many questions floating in his mind and most of them started with why. Why did he sign that contract? Ten nights felt like forever. If he made this much money for a second and third night, he would be able to pay off the bills in the drawer next to his bed. Why hadn't he been more persistent in just working three nights? Why did Minho follow him? Why did he take his services in men if he wasn’t interested the slightest bit? Why did Taemin agree to his offer? Why was his life such a mess? And most importantly: Why did it feel so good?

Rarely in his life had he gotten pleasure from sex like last night. He hated himself for liking what Minho did to him. Not that he particularly liked bottoming but this was the first time he stayed aroused while being penetrated.

Taemin’s steps were irregular and got slower the closer he got to the place he was heading to. When he walked through the door and met another familiar face he could not bring himself to smile at Songhee even though he had not seen her five years and she greeted him with her brightest smile.

“Hey” He just said, walking to the desk while pulling out the money he had gotten from last night.

“Oh gosh, I have heard from Dasol that you are back but seeing you myself is entirely different. Nice to see you again.”

Taemin knew she was only being nice, and probably really enjoyed seeing him again, but all he could think off was the reason he was here. So, he just nodded and started to count what he had. Songhee accepted the fact that Taemin didn’t want to talk, after all she knew why he was here.

“How long?” She asked instead, her smile disappearing.

“30 minutes.”

Songhee typed it into the computer and shortly later, Taemin left the place with half of his pay in his jacket hoping that Kibum stayed over at Jinki’s place so he wouldn’t have to explain why he hadn’t been home last night.

It was almost noon when Minho woke up in the hotel room. At first, he hardly remembered how he ended up in this bed, but when he saw his naked frame, memories from last night came back in pieces. Memories he would have preferred to stay hidden in the depth of his mind.

He had sex with a man. He, Choi Minho, buttfucked a man. And he even payed for it! Shocked at his own actions, he reached for his purse, and with a look inside, he saw how much he actually spent on the prostitute. That sex worker being Taemin did not make it any better.

Minho buried his face in his hands, the little self-respect he had had left was gone. Blaming it on the alcohol was easy, but facing the fact that despite everything, he remembered how good it had felt to be together with the dancer. He told himself it was because Taemin was a professional and knew how to please his customers. Believing there was no other reason for the pleasure he had found in last night’s intercourse was a different story.

Slowly, Minho’s naked frame got up from the bed, looking for his clothes. He found them neatly folded on the chair the room provided. There was not a chance that he had been the one folding them. So, did Taemin do it? Why would he? Was that part of the job? Minho wasn’t sure…

Before he left the room, he decided to check on his appearance and entered the bathroom. When he turned on the light and saw his familiar reflection, there was something about it that confused him. His hair was messy, and he looked tired. There were no marks anywhere, he didn’t look like he had spent such a hot night. Usually when he had his fun with women, he looked like sex the next morning. But that lusty look wasn’t there and made Minho almost question if last night really happened. A small glance to the trash cleared the situation as three used condoms were there on top of some tissues.

Minho had mixed feelings, on the one hand, he wished that last night had never happened and on the other, he was glad when he saw the used condoms between the tissues.

“Choi Minho get your shit together” He said to himself and turned off the light again before leaving the hotel. Walking out of it was awful, he felt like everyone was watching him, knowing he had just spent a night with a male prostitute. Of course, that was ridiculous, but he couldn’t help but feel watched.

During the next few weeks, Minho had a hard time concentrating on university. He had thought that forgetting the first night at the club was hard but forgetting the night at the hotel was way harder. From time to time he had flashbacks, remembering new things about the night which usually made his blood flow south.

As the semester started to get busy, his motivation sunk further, and he barely went to the seminars he needed to go. Lectures he did not attend at all. This behaviour got him scolded often when he came back to his grandparent’s house, as long as the elderly pair were at home. Minho did not feel like doing anything these days. He slept a lot, thinking about life and how much he hated it.

There were some days where he met up with a random girl, Nahee long forgotten, fucking her and then leaving her place, mostly disappointed because it couldn’t compare to what he had experienced with Taemin.

The first week he hated himself for sleeping with a dude, but the more the memories came back, the more he realised that that was probably the most pleasurable night he had had in his life. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, somehow, he wanted to do it again. Pay for sex. It excited him to have his way with someone who knows what they are doing. Someone who would let him do what he wanted.

Three weeks after his encounter with Taemin, he decided to give it another try and went back to the only place he knew. The place where he had picked up Taemin last time.

As soon as his car drove into the street, he was noticed by the workers who were looking for customers. Most of them being girls - every single one pretty as a flower. They weren’t like Minho imagined prostitutes to be. Maybe that was because this was Gangnam? There was one woman approaching his car soon, she was tiny, even while wearing heels. Her long hair was flowing along her girly frame, not covering her very exposed breasts which were a little too big for her small body.

But to Minho she was perfect, he liked having his women smaller than him and the bigger the breasts the better. He let the window of the car down and asked for her price. When she named an amount, he noticed that it wasn’t even half the price he had paid for Taemin. But before he could think about it more, he nodded, and the woman got into the car.

The night was nowhere near what he had expected. Thinking it would be even greater than the one he spent with Taemin, because this time he had a professional WOMAN doing him. But to his disappointment she just let herself be fucked. There was nothing about her that fascinated Minho. The sex was good, she had a gorgeous body after all, but despite the visual appeal, it was boring.

When he came back home that night shortly past midnight, he felt as if he had wasted his night. As always, he avoided any contact to his grandparents, rushing to his room immediately.

Lying on his bed he tried to make sense of the situation. Maybe it was the alcohol that made him experience such immense pleasure when he was with Taemin. It was the only reasonable explanation.

A few days after, on a Friday, Minho was late as usual. He was supposed to eat lunch with Jinki and Kibum at 12:15 and it was almost half past. When he finally found the table where the other two were seated, he just managed to hear a tiny bit of their conversation before he sat down on the chair across the table.

“… You know, it is just strange, Taemin normally is around Thursday evenings. But these days he seems to work throughout the whole week” Kibum was just telling Jinki, making a short pause to greet Minho. The tallest just nodded, not wanting to interrupt their conversation – secretly interested in what the raven-haired male had to say about Taemin.

“Anyways, the thing is I feel really bad for making him work so much, it isn’t a piece of cake to pay for rent and the bills, and here I am just studying, not supporting him the slightest bit even though I am older.” Kibum’s voice sounded sad.

“Oh, wait” Minho interrupted “You guys live together?”

“You didn’t know? Yes, we do, for almost two years now.” Kibum looked at Jinki, confused that the oldest had not told his best friend.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Jinki asked “It is not as if that is of any relevance to Minho, he hasn’t even really met Taemin… which is a shame by the way, he is such a sweet guy. I don’t know it just hasn’t come up…” He tried to explain even though it was no big deal that he hadn’t told Minho about Kibum and Taemin sharing a flat.

“Yes yes, Jinki no need to explain yourself. Anyways” Kibum started again “We are sharing an apartment. Anyway maybe you can help me as well. I’ll give you a short input on the situation. As you may have noticed, I am no longer working at the club, trying to concentrate on my studies but it was pretty much Taemin who decided on that by himself. He thought it was stupid to have me working while studying when he could make enough money to pay the bills. That is why he made me quit the job.”

Minho nodded, following what Kibum was saying, slightly in awe at the long-haired male’s gentle and loving side. That must be a heavy burden to carry.

“I only agreed to that because Jonghyun had offered him a job as the choreographer for the club which gives him an additional monthly pay to the performances he still has in the evenings. We hardly see each other anymore these days, since he is working from noon until late past midnight and most of my classes are starting early. We used to have Thursday evenings to spend together since that is Taemin’s day off at the club. But since a bit over three weeks ago he seems to be working Thursdays also, at least he comes home late then as well. It is just strange because Jonghyun has the strict principal of giving each dancer at least one night off to regain strength.” Kibum finished with a sigh.

Minho’s mind was working, counting three weeks back. Three weeks ago, was Jinki’s birthday party. Adding one plus one, Minho guessed what Taemin was doing on Thursday evenings. Kibum didn’t seem to know about his friend selling his body, but he wanted to be sure.

“Maybe he has a second job? If he can’t be working at the club that you worked at?” He suggested, pretending not to know anything

“He doesn’t… and that is why it confuses me. Maybe he is meeting someone?”

“You should ask him.” Jinki said and Kibum nodded.

The rest of their lunch break, Minho felt incredibly uncomfortable, having guessed the whereabouts of the long-haired male on Thursdays and feeling like invading Taemin’s private space if he told Kibum about his ‘second job’. He wasn’t in any position to be giving this information to the raven-haired male.

The following weekend, his mind went back to what Kibum had said several times. Thinking about it, he was impressed by Taemin working every day, just so his friend could focus on his studies. But then again, he felt so bad about the way he was doing it. How desperate do you have to be to sell your own body to strangers.

He wasn’t as disgusted with sex workers as he had been before his encounter with one. In Minho’s imagination, prostitutes had been cheap, sex-loving whores. But who could blame him, that is what has been taught to him in his life, that was what society tells you. But his night with Taemin as well as the woman showed him that there were probably more reasons behind the work they did than he knew.

It bothered him a lot to know that Taemin is out there every Thursday offering himself to customers. He did not quite know why he wanted to get the long-haired male out of that scene, but he could not help but dislike the fact that he was in it.

He decided to go and find Taemin the following Thursday night, going back to the place he had been twice now already. It wasn’t as busy as the Friday he had been there but there were still quite a few people around, workers and customers. He also saw several ones walk in and out of the buildings along the side of the road.

For over twenty minutes he had parked his car on the corner of the street, looking out for the long-haired male.

What even are you doing here? He asked himself, suddenly feeling ridiculous, waiting for Taemin to make an appearance. Why do you care so much? Let’s go home. This was a stupid idea.

Minho had already turned on the motor when there was a knock on the window, A young woman, probably in her early twenties was standing there, waiting for Minho to roll the window down – and so he did.

“Are you waiting for something, honey?” She said, her voice so overly sweet that Minho almost cringed.

“Actually, I am looking for Taemin, is he around?” He said, and the woman’s expression darkened.

“Why is everyone always looking for Taemin?” She mumbled to herself, but it was loud enough for Minho to hear. But before he could react, she already continued, louder this time.

“I don’t know, I haven’t seen him around tonight, he probably has an appointment within ‘Erotes’.”

“Erotes?” Minho asked, the word vaguely familiar he just didn’t remember where he heard it before.

“Oh boy are you new around here? Over there, the building on the side with the Greek-mythology-themed logo. That is where Taemin is signed.” She pointed at the said building where Minho could make out a logo of a winged god. If he was honest, he had no idea what the woman was talking about. Why is he signed there? Does that mean there is a contract? Why? He was a simple prostitute, not some sort of company worker. That was when he remembered the legal break down the dancer had given him before they had sex.

Were there really fully functioning businesses that cared about formalities in this scene of work?

Before he could stop his curiosity, he had already asked. “Sorry to ask again, But what does that mean he is signed there? There are contracts?”

“Oh boy do I look like google to you?” she said, visibly annoyed.

Minho pulled out a 50’000won bill and gave it to the surprised woman, who was now more than willing to answer his questions.

“Can you answer my questions now?”

“Of course, Sir.” She sung, folding the bill neatly in half, putting it away. “Well, this place is not the usual red-light district you may have heard off. Basically, this is the top notch, the place where the richest customers come and therefore the workers here are closely regulated. This means that everyone who wants to work here needs to have signed a contract with one of the brothels in this street which usually means an equal share in the earnings. This regulation of the workers guarantees the quality of the service provided for the paying customers. Only the best and most beautiful get to work here. We also get tested for STD’s regularly – if you test positive you’re out.”

Taking in all the new information, Minho nodded. He knew that prostitution is a business. But being confronted with the organisation in the sex market was different. There literally were companies who signed sex workers and let them work for them? It suddenly made sense why Taemin had cared so much about protection if his earnings were dependant on it he wouldn’t take the risk either.

“Is there anything else you want to know?” The woman asked, waiting for Minho to say something.

“Uhm” Minho started, did he need to know anything else? Not really. But then out of curiosity he decided to ask one more question.

“How long has Taemin been around for?”

“Oh, it has only been a few weeks since I have first seen him, I think. But he already has a reputation, one lucky man he is.”

Minho exhaled. That was good to know. At least, Taemin hadn’t been doing this for long. But then again… if he had only been working here for a few weeks that would mean Minho should have been one of his very first customers. So why did Taemin seem like such a professional? Like he had done this hundreds of times already? Something just didn’t add up. The club didn’t seem like a place where prostitution was a thing.

“Sir?” The woman asked, pulling Minho out of his thoughts.

“Hmm? Yes? Did you say something?”

“I was just asking if that would be all.”

Minho nodded and watched the beautiful woman walk away. Should he go and ask for Taemin in ‘Erotes’? He suddenly felt like a stalker, a creepy one at that, even asking prostitutes about the dancer’s whereabouts.

He stayed in the car for a few more minutes battling himself if he should or should not go and look for him. Minho didn’t have any rights to invade Taemin’s private life like that. They had intercourse once and met another time, but that pretty much summed up their relationship, he couldn’t just look for him at his workplace, even less at THIS particular workplace.

But somehow, he felt the need to check it out with his own eyes, maybe his juristic skills would be useful for once if there really was a contract, he was sure that somewhere there was a wormhole and he could get Taemin out of this. Maybe it was the famous “Knight-in-shining-armour-syndrom” but Minho couldn’t help but want the long-haired male to get out of this milieu.

Another few minutes later, he stood in front of the Greek style building, taking one deep breath before walking through the glass door. The interior of this place was of incredible detail, walls and floor kept in a dark burgundy, Greek-themed pillars decorating the walls. A desk close to the entrance with a pretty woman sitting behind it, looking up immediately when the tall male entered.

“How can I help you?”

“Uhm… I am looking for Taemin.” Minho said.

“Let me see if he has a free slot. When were you looking to book him?” She asked much to the tall male’s surprise. This was like making an appointment with the hairdresser.

“I am just here to meet him.”

“Oh honey, I am afraid he is already fully booked tonight, but if you like, I can get you an appointment with one of our others.” The woman said, looking up at the handsome man in front of her.

“Nono, you don’t understand, I don’t want to book… uhm… a session with him, I am a…” Minho was trying to come up with something that sounded at least somehow possible. “I am a co-worker of his”

“Really? You don’t really look like you are… OH, I guess you work at Jonghyun’s?” She did look partly convinced.

“Yes, at the bar. I am a barkeeper.” Hoping his lie would come as at least somehow believable.

“Is that so… well Taemin is currently in a session, wait let me check until when it is.” The woman typed some things on the computer, her eyebrows furrowing. “Well I guess I have to disappoint you; this will probably take longer. Is it urgent? If it is not, I would advise you to just talk to him at work tomorrow.”

“It is urgent” Minho said without thinking.

“Well I cannot interrupt the session, and I cannot let you know with whom and where he currently is, so all you could do is take a seat over there in the lounge." She pointed at the other side of the room where a few sofas were placed. "I can also get you a drink while you wait for him to come to the desk to check out.”

Today’s session was emotionally draining. Taemin was working together with one of the rookies. The two of them had been booked by a man Taemin knew well - he went by the name of Mr. Hong. Taemin had worked for him a few years ago several times. He tends to come with his colleagues from work, particularly enjoying having their late-night meetings with two boys fucking next to them.

They were currently in the biggest room ‘Erotes’ had to offer. Like all of them, it was coloured in burgundy, dim light coming from the ceiling. On one side there was a big black table with comfortable, couch like benches on three sides where five men in suits were seated, discussing their business plan while watching the two boys lazily, sometimes giving instructions to the naked men on the elevation in front of them. Instructions that got crazier as the evening got older.

He couldn’t understand why people would handle their meetings like this. Who would need two boys fucking while they are deciding on important issues?

Actually, Taemin could not decide what was worse: the physical pain that most one-on-one sessions brought or the humiliation of appointments like these. The rookie that was booked together with him was 17 and he reminded Taemin so much of himself when he first started in this business. Like he had done, he was lying about his age as only workers over 18 were allowed in the official brothels. Like him he had run away from a foster family. Like him he had pretty much nowhere to go.

Gyutae was smaller than Taemin and the older felt like he would break the fragile boy with every thrust. He tried to be as gentle as possible whenever he could but who was he to oppose the spectators’ commands?

The middle-aged men usually did not hide their pleasure and complimented the long-haired male for fucking- and Gyutae for taking- Taemin’s dick so well. With every obscene word they said, Taemin felt worse and worse for the young boy who was moaning under him.

He had met Gyutae two weeks ago when he came to work. He saw him talking to Junhwan and then later, after his appointment, sitting upstairs in the room where the workers could shower and get ready for their sessions, his face in his small hands, silently crying. After that night, which included long talks and many warm hugs, Taemin took the beautiful boy under his wings.

Their close relationship, of course, didn’t stay hidden to Junhwan who immediately saw a possibility to raise Gyutae’s popularity. So, when Mr. Hong came to book an appointment Gyuntae was offered as the second boy in addition to Taemin, whom Mr. Hong was more than glad to see back.

This is what left them in the situation in which they were now in, naked on an elevated section of the floor, which was coated in dark red, soft fabric, made for just one purpose. Only when the meeting was over, the members of the company were allowed to get themselves off which they did while watching Taemin fucking poor overstimulated Gyutae who’s back hurt from the rough treatment. Only Mr. Hong could touch them. It had always been that way. The middle-aged man never let his guests touch the boys he booked. That was another thing that hadn’t changed since Taemin had been regularly booked for his meetings. Mr. Hong walked over and pulled Taemin away from the smaller male, making the latter shiver at the sudden loss of warmth and the feeling of emptiness.

“I have missed you. Where have you been for so long?”

Taemin did not answer so the bearded man took his face into his hands, squishing his cheeks.

“You are surely a beauty to look at. Maybe I should come around for a private session before you disappear again.” The grin on Mr. Hong’s face disgusted Taemin but he politely nodded.

“Well done today, Taeminnie” he said, pulling a few bills from his suit, throwing them to the floor.

The nickname disgusted Taemin. But he thanked the man anyways.

“You too rookie, I wasn’t disappointed. Share it evenly.” He said, looking at Gyutae who had sat up, hugging his knees before putting his attention back to Taemin.

“I will see you again.” With those words he brought his face closer to Taemin’s and gently placed a kiss on the long-haired male’s lips.

When all the men were finally gone, Taemin helped Guytae up to get them cleaned up.

“Are you alright?” He asked gently and the smaller nodded.

“Yes Hyung, it was you after all. So, I didn’t mind.” He reassured the older whose brows knitted.

“Wasn’t I too rough? I am so sorry.” He apologized but Gyutae only shook his head and hugged Taemin.

“Can we get cleaned up?” The younger asked and they made their way over to the showers.

Of course, Taemin helped Gyutae clean up, scrubbing his skin gently.

“Thank you Hyung, for being with me.”

After both of them were clean, they put on their clothes, getting ready to leave.

“I’ll take you to the Goshiwon.” Taemin said, which got him a beautiful smile from the smaller. For some reason Gyutae loved riding on Taemin’s motorcycle even if his behind hurt because of the vibrations.

“Thank you so much!!” He said cheerfully, when with Taemin he was like a regular 17-year-old boy. It was a pity that life didn’t go his way. They were happily talking when they walked down the stairs, any humiliation from before hidden in the back of his minds.

“Do you think I could get a licence as well?” Gyutae was asking when they approached the desk to get their share of the money Mr. Hong had paid for the past four hours.

“I am sure you can” Taemin said, ruffling the younger’s hair. “Dasol, could we get our share of today’s session?”

“Sure, give me a second” She said, busying herself with the safe under the desk while talking: “Oh, and Tae, there is someone waiting for you – someone from work apparently, ‘it is urgent’ he said…”

There was no one who knows about this place at the club. Something was fishy. He didn’t know anyone who would have anything ‘urgent’ to say… was it Kibum? But how the hell did he know about this place? It couldn’t be him could it? He looked around the room only to see a familiar figure he hadn't noticed before, standing on the other side, watching them closely.

Gyutae, who saw the tall man’s intense eyes staring at Taemin, tightened his hold on the long-haired male’s sleeve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, comments are appreciated, and yes I will say this over and over even if it does nothing ahhahahah
> 
> hope y'all have a good day and thanks for reading anyway XD


	12. A Job, Nothing More

After the lady at the desk had brought him some water, Minho sat down on one of the sofas which were across the room. He waited for over two hours, watched many people come and go, many of them judging the sitting male silently. But most of the time Minho was on his phone anyway, ignoring what was happening around him.

When the clock showed shortly past midnight, there was a larger group, five people to be exact, coming down the stairs. All of them were men, probably in their late forties, each and every one wearing expensive suits Minho recognised easily. As they approached the desk, he could not help but overhear their loud conversation.

“Taemin is good, isn’t he?” the tallest of the men said, making Minho listen closely at the mention of Taemin’s name.

“He really is, how did you know about him? I have rarely seen such a good top.”

“And he really is a beauty” another one said before the bearded man answered the question.

“I have had many sessions with him a few years ago. He has always been a beauty.” He said. “Actually, I think he looks even better now, his ass looks firmer, and he has matured. Definitely is carrying more muscles with him.” he continued, making Minho cringe inside. He was disgusted by the way these men talked about the long-haired male.

“Oh, and what did you guys think about the new kid?” Another one asked while the tallest one was talking to the woman at the desk.

“He’s cute, I liked how inexperienced he was.”

“Yes right? But despite being so new, I think he took Taemin’s dick really well, he is pretty intense after all.”

“I agree, so you think we should get an appointment with them again?” the other four were talking to each other, making Minho’s insides crawl but he tried not to show it, so he sat there, pretending he was doing something on his phone.

“Alright, it is paid for! Let’s go” The tallest man said, joining the group’s conversation again while they walked outside.

It couldn’t take long until Taemin came, now that the clients left. While Minho was waiting, the words of the men in suits were all over his mind. The tallest said something about knowing him since a few years ago, which would explain why the long-haired male seemed to know what he was doing, despite the female telling him she had only seen him around for a few weeks.

The second thing that his thoughts would constantly return to, despite Minho trying not to think about it too much, was the comment about Taemin being a great top. Minho was not ignorant; he knew what that meant. He had to admit that the long-haired male could definitely be dominant in bed, and somehow, he wondered what it would be like to bottom for him, but every time he thought about it he tried to put it to the back of his head immediately. What was Taemin doing to him? He was so confused about everything.

The third thing that kept popping up was the mention of the “new kid”. How young must that boy be that they talk about him like that. This was awful. Minho couldn’t wait to get out of here.

About half an hour later, he heard Taemin’s voice, and only a few seconds later, the long-haired male came down the stairs, closely followed by a slightly smaller male, who was happily talking to the older. Without noticing, Minho had gotten up, watching the interaction of the two.

“Do you think I could get a licence as well?” the boy asked excitedly, making Taemin smile.

“I am sure you can” Minho heard the long-haired male answer while the two were walking to the desk. Taemin ruffled the smaller’s hair lovingly before talking to the lady at the desk.

He couldn’t make out what they were talking about but the next thing he knew, Taemin was turning around, looking at him directly, his relaxed face darkening instantly when he recognised the tall male. Minho noticed the smaller boy’s hand, which gripped Taemin’s shirt when he spotted him.

Before he could walk over to where the two were standing, Taemin shook his head, throwing angry looks towards him and turned around to take the cash the lady at the desk had put there. He saw Taemin counting the money, giving half of it to the smaller male who was still watching Minho closely as if he thought he was a threat to them.

He saw Taemin saying something to the smaller male who then took his eyes off Minho, nodded and walked outside while the long-haired male came over, brows furrowed.

“You don’t know your place, do you? What the fuck are you doing here?” He snapped at the taller instantly and before Minho could explain, Taemin continued.

“Just get the fuck out.”

“Kibum worries about you.” Minho said, hoping to get a reaction from the smaller male.

“Don’t you dare say a word about this to Kibum, boy. I will strip you of your precious dick the moment you do.”

“I just wanted to—” the taller started but was interrupted by the other.

“I really don’t care what you think or what you do or wanted to do or just anything connected to you. Just keep the fuck away from me. My life is none of your business. For your sake, don’t turn up here again. Did I make this clear?”

Minho nodded, completely overwhelmed by the extreme reaction he hadn’t expected. Taemin turned around and walked away, leaving Minho standing there in shock. He had waited so many hours just to be shouted at? By the time he had gotten control of himself again, Taemin was already past the door and Minho jogged out, following the smaller.

Outside in the cold night air, he shivered after sitting in the warmth for so long. He saw Taemin on the side, taking out a helmet for the boy and then one for himself. He walked closer unnoticed because they were looking the other way.

“Taemin-Hyung, Is that your boyfriend?” He heard the boy say before Taemin took the helmet out of his hands, putting it over the smaller’s head, hitting it slightly.

“Don’t say things you don’t understand Gyutae-ya. Let’s go” The long-haired male’s voice was soft and loving, something Minho hadn't heard before. Somehow Gyutae’s question woke something in him and that feeling did not leave when the motorcycle drove away into the night.

Sitting in his car shortly after, Minho felt jealous. He knew he was. He had been jealous before and this was exactly how it felt like. He was jealous of the boy for sitting behind Taemin on the motorcycle, hugging the long-haired male’s athletic frame. Minho vaguely remembered the feeling of freedom on the ride when Taemin brought him home after the meeting in the club.

His hands on the wheel of the standing car, he groaned and leaned back. He couldn’t really be jealous, could he? After a few minutes, when his mind was clear enough, he started the motor and drove home.

During the next week, in addition to his jealousy and the fact that he worried and thought about Taemin a little more than would be appropriate, he felt a longing to see the dancer again. He wouldn’t go as far as to say he missed him, but it was awfully close.

Minho was confused, on the one hand, he still tried to prove to himself that he wasn’t sexually or romantically interested in men, but every time he thought back to the night he spent with Taemin, he had to admit, that he was indeed, at least sexually, attracted to him - a man.

Just a few days after, he found himself standing in front of the club Taemin worked at. He had to see the other and make sense of his feelings. He couldn’t go on like that, this whole thing bothered him every single hour of the day and even kept him from getting a good amount of sleep. He had to get rid of this confusion and talk to the dancer. And since he had no other possibility to contact him but to visit him at work, he was now standing in line to get into the said club, unlike last time he was alone and did not know that Jonghyun dude.

After what felt like ages, he was finally let inside, but not without paying quite the fee to get in. This really wasn’t just any lowlife club but an elite institution. His memories of that night were still vague and messy, but he surely did not remember the interior to be this fancy.

Being alone and not completely drunk, he felt out of place in between all these men. But soon, the performances started, and he could just watch the dancers on stage which were preforming a choreography with chairs. Minho had to admit that these dancers knew how to move. He would lie if he said that he didn’t enjoy it. But it was nowhere close to how Taemin’s dancing affected him. There was just something different about him.

During the evening there were several more performances and Minho was already getting unsure if the long-haired male was working tonight. But Kibum had said he works every night except for Thursdays. Today was Tuesday so he should be around.

In between the acts, he had gotten himself some drinks and had rejected more men than he could count. He made a mental note never to go to a gay club alone again. Wait, never to go again at all.

It was already past midnight and Minho was close to leaving when the next act was announced and Taemin stepped on stage. He was wearing a white ruffled dress shirt and tight black shorts which displayed his beautiful toned legs perfectly. His hair was put up into a bun, giving a free view of Taemin’s face that he had only seen once, when he was on top of him.

Minho was sitting a little to the side of the stage, but in the very first row, watching as Taemin started to move his body with the sound of the music that had begun on a dirty and deep beat. Already the body roll that started off the choreography made Minho’s heart beat faster. Unlike the previous dancers, Taemin did not have anything with him on stage, no pole, no chairs, not even other dancers. It was just him - and he was captivating every single person in the room, including Minho, all by himself.

His hips swayed from one side to another in a slow but calculated motion while his head rolled back, eyes closing and his hands roaming his thighs. Sometime his arms would go behind his back, moving sensually around his figure. With the drop of the song, Taemin let himself fall onto his knees, bending over and leaving a not very innocent view on his perky ass.

There were whistles from all-over the room and the long-haired dancer started lowering himself even closer to the floor, holding himself up with one arm. The beat had slowed down and Taemin’s hips started following it, thrusting slowly towards the dark floor of the stage.

Taemin’s body control was amazing and Minho couldn’t help but think back to the night they spent together; this body has been under him. The long-haired male seemed to be made out of muscles as he managed to speed up his seductive thrusts while turning around when the beat got faster.

And then, when the bridge came, somehow Taemin was able to get back on his feet gracefully in less than a second while ripping the white rippled dress shirt open in the process.

That moment, the audience lost it, and Taemin just smirked. He knew what effect he had on the men. His hand was placed on his crotch, teasing the audience who just wanted him to move again. Just seconds later, the pace of the song changed and Taemin’s hand started rubbing the black tight shorts, massaging the dick hidden underneath.

Soon, he was back with the choreography, following the beat perfectly like in the beginning, just that now his chest was revealed and with it his beautiful tattoos. The hands that roamed his body, Minho wished they could be his. He vaguely remembered how Taemin’s skin feels underneath his touch. And he wanted it, he really needed to feel it again.

The dancer was now moving from one side of the stage to the other and stopped very close to where Minho was seated, so close, the taller could see small pearly drops of sweat drip down the other’s toned torso. And then, just when he was playing with the hem of his shorts, a few fingers making their way underneath the black fabric, Taemin’s eyes met Minho’s.

Minho thought he would explode right at that moment. Taemin’s dark eyes that stared right into his were too much to take, not to speak of where the dancer’s hand was currently at. Neither of them broke the eye contact for a few seconds, but Taemin’s expression darkened when he recognised him. It could be interpreted as lust, especially with the context but to Minho it was so much more, something slightly different. It was almost intimidating, so he looked away first.

As the professional Taemin was, he finished up the performance as usual. It was over way to quickly and ended with Taemin turning around, then pulling his shirt down to show the audience his naked shoulders while he shot a seductive look over his shoulders into the room.

The next thing Minho knew was that Taemin had disappeared backstage and he was left with a room full of cheering men. He wanted to see him again. He just had to. Completely spent, rearranging his thoughts, he sat on the leather sofa. A few minutes later, without having control over his own body, he stood up and walked over to the door where he managed to get backstage last time. Again, a security guard was standing at the door, eying Minho carefully.

“I am sorry sir; I cannot let you through” The tall male said.

“I would like to talk to Taemin for a second, it is not going to take long.” Minho answered, slightly intimidated by the muscular man who spoke so forcefully while remaining polite.

“He has personally instructed me to not let you backstage.”

There was no arguing with this man, Minho knew that, so he turned around, not quite knowing what to do. Then he remembered where he had left the club with Taemin last time. There was a backdoor where Taemin’s motorcycle should be parked.

Just minutes after he left the club, Minho found it and got ready to wait for the long-haired male, it wasn’t exactly cosy due to the cold temperatures - but he just couldn’t go home without talking to the other. He needed to get this out, otherwise he would never be able to get his mind of it.

It took over two hours until, close to 3am when -finally- a familiar figure exited the club, Taemin looking incredibly tired without all the makeup that he had been wearing before. Minho stood up and called out Taemin’s name which made the latter look up from his keys in confusion.

“Didn’t you get the message?” He snapped, but despite his angry reaction his face remained drained and tired.

“I did but hear me out.” Minho said and Taemin rolled his eyes, giving in – he was too tired to put up resistance.

“What is so important you come to both of my work places for?”

“I don’t really know how to say this…” The taller started.

“Oh JESUS, and now you don’t even know how to say it?! Great. I don’t have all night. Get it over with it.” The long-haired male was visibly annoyed by Minho who stopped him from getting home.

“I might like you.” There it was, it had needed all of Minho’s willpower to say it, but he knew that this was the last possible moment for him to do so. And he really didn’t need these constant thoughts about the dancer. It was the last thing he could use. So, explaining everything to Taemin and getting rejected was the only way to get over with this.

Taemin raised his eyebrows. That was not at all what he had expected to hear. But before Taemin could answer anything, Minho continued.

“I know, I am straight, I don’t know what happened either, all I know is that I keep thinking about you and that uhm… that night. But I want to stop thinking about it. So, I decided to tell you this and have you reject me since I know that you don’t feel the same. Even if I know that, I really need to hear it from you. This whole issue is stressing me out so much and I just want to get it over with. Get you off my mind.”

There was silence for a second and Minho was already regretting confessing his feelings to the other male.

“I am sorry, I shouldn’t have come and told you. I’ll leave now.” The taller said, turning around, trying to get away as fast as possible.

“Wait” He heard Taemin’s voice behind him which made him turn around. “Don’t worry, you are not the only one who comes confessing to me. If you need to hear it from me: I do not have any feelings for you, you were a job, nothing more. So, don’t take it personally.”

Minho was quiet, despite expecting this answer, even wanting it, it still hurt to hear Taemin talk to trivially about it. So, he just nodded, accepting what the dancer said.

“It is just a phase, believe me. I am not someone to get into a relationship with, what you feel is physical attraction, nothing more.” The long-haired male continued.

There was another moment of silence, neither of them knowing what to say until Taemin saw how red Minho’s hands were from the cold. And after thinking about it for a few seconds he offered Minho to take him home.

“You look cold, I’ll take you home” He said, opening the seat of the motorcycle, offering a helmet to the freezing male.

“No really, I am fine, I’ll just get a cab.” Minho said but Taemin had already made up his mind.

“Don’t be a pussy. Just because you confessed and I rejected you, it doesn’t mean I cannot take you home after you waited out here in the cold for hours I assume?” the last part was a question and Minho nodded. The offer was very tempting. He was tired, and really cold, his toes not left with much feeling and his hands were burning from the icy air. Thinking over his options, he came to the conclusion that going with Taemin was probably the fastest way. Waiting to catch a cab and then having it drive through the whole city slowly, because that was what cab drivers do, drive slowly to get more money, wasn’t really what he wanted to do right now.

Without a word, Minho took the offer by reaching for the helmet. He would be lying if he said, he didn’t get onto the motorcycle to be able to close his arms around Taemin’s strong, hot body.

When the dancer started the motor and took Minho’s hands to close them around his torso, Minho’s heart started beating faster. The vibrations underneath them were intense and woke up his whole body. And then, after Taemin instructed Minho to hold on tight, they drove through the night.

Taemin was fast, leaving cars behind while the city was flying by them. It wasn’t at all like the first time, Minho wasn’t scared anymore but was able to enjoy every second, the wind around them, the city lights, but most of all, Taemin’s body warmth which was warming him up from the front.

Way too soon, they arrived at Minho’s grandparents’ place and Taemin stopped the motor, placing one leg on the floor to let the taller get off. Almost unwillingly Minho opened his tight embrace, getting off the motorcycle and then handing back the helmet which Taemin hung on the handlebar.

“Thank you.” The taller said, slightly bowing his head to him.

“You are welcome. I would really appreciate if you wouldn’t come looking for me again, it makes me uncomfortable.” Taemin said after opening the face shield.

“I understand.”

“You being friends with Kibum’s beloved Jinki is not really helping here, but if we meet on whatever occasion, just pretend you don’t know me. It will be easier for both of us.”

“Sure.”

Taemin nodded and closed the face shield again, starting the motor and then disappearing in the dark streets. Minho was left standing in front of what he was supposed to call home. Why then, did it feel so cold and Taemin so warm?

When he was in his bed he thought back. Confessing did seem to help after all. Minho didn’t feel as restless as before. He had heard with his own ears where Taemin stood and had no choice but to accept that he was no more than a job to the long-haired male. Also, the drive back home felt like a good, nice ending for their non-existent relationship. Minho had gotten to hug the smaller one last time and he was glad that it ended like that, without any bad memories. Maybe he was bi-sexual and that was ok?

It wasn’t as if Minho had completely fallen for the dancer, it was nothing more than a crush and he was sure he would get over it, hopefully soon. There were more than enough beautiful women around. So, having everything talked out with Taemin, he would be able to finish this up and finally move on. Slightly sad that it was over, but relieved that it ended, Minho closed his eyes and managed to fall asleep easily, unlike the last few weeks.

He stirred awake when he felt cold hands making their way underneath his boxers, touching the soft organ beneath. Minho’s eyes tried to adjust to the darkness which surrounded him, but he could just barely make out a silhouette of what appeared to be a woman. Her long hair was up in a bun, it was too dark to see her face.

Her hand started rubbing his slowly waking member, making Minho lean into her touch. The tall male’s mind was still clouded, and he didn’t take note of the woman’s other hand which travelled further down, stopping at his anus. When he realised what she was doing, it was already too late. One finger had made it past the puckered rim. He tried to move away from it, but it was useless, he was cuffed to the bed.

“Don’t worry boy, I’ll make you feel so good.” Taemin’s deep voice sent shivers down his spine and Minho pressed himself against the dancer’s touch, asking for more. Just moments and two fingers later, the taller felt something bigger, hotter press against his rim. He couldn’t wait. He needed Taemin now.

“Please” Minho begged, and the dancer complied, burying his penis deep inside Minho hole in one calculated thrust. Taemin instantly built up a rhythm while stroking Minho’s already leaking member. It felt so good. He was made for this. He was made for taking Taemin’s dick, Minho felt Taemin’s hands on his throat, gently pressing down, closing his airways.

Minho was floating in a wave of pleasure, his orgasm approaching. Taking Taemin’s penis felt so good. How could it feel so good? Should it feel good? Why was Taemin’s member buried in his ass? This was wrong. Something was really wrong.

Drenched in sweat, Minho woke up. Eyes wide open, seeing nothing but darkness, he was panting while looking for the light switch, turning it on. What had just happened? But his erection gave no space for denial.

“Are you fucking serious?!?” He shouted - it wasn’t as if anyone could hear him in this big mansion anyway.

Pushing that dream to the depth of his mind to not die from embarrassment, he just barely got through the next day without turning up at the club, again, which would make it two times in a row. He knew he couldn’t do that. He had promised Taemin not to come around anymore. And the last thing he wanted was for the dancer to hate him.

On Friday he was sitting at lunch with Jinki and Kibum, quieter than usual and of course Jinki noticed the changes in his long-time friend. Kibum on the other hand was busy texting someone not paying attention to the other two. Knowing he wouldn't be listening, Jinki decided to bring it up despite the raven-haired male’s presence.

“Minho? Are you alright?” He asked, worried that something might have come up regarding the accident. Because that is the only time when Minho acted this strange.

“I am alright, don’t worry.” Minho said, giving his friend a reassuring look.

“Guys, I really don’t know what to do about Taemin.” Kibum then stated, oblivious to the strange air around them, interrupting the conversation of the two friends.

“Why did you suddenly think about that?” Jinki wondered.

“Because…” The raven-haired male started before looking exited. “OH! Minho! Taemin will be picking me up in a few to get to a doctor’s appointment, so you’ll finally get to meet him!”

Minho’s heart stopped beating for a second and then sped up like crazy. Taemin was on his way here? Should he leave to not make him uncomfortable? Could he even face him? Minho wasn’t too sure if he could after the recent events. He just barely made note of the conversation Jinki and Kibum were having.

“So, what is with him again?”

“Not again, still. He was not home yesterday evening either and I am starting to think that there is something wrong.” Kibum sighed which made the oldest take his hand in his own.

“You should ask him. Really. As soon as possible. It cannot continue this way. He is your friend after all, you have a right to know what is happening in his life.”

“I am not so sure if I have, all I do is live off his money, I am a poor excuse of a friend.” Kibum sounded sad but all Minho could think of was the fact that in the next minutes, the dancer will be turning up here and while he was debating whether to leave or not, an athletic figure made its way to the table where the three friends were sitting.

Taemin had his hair messily put up with a hairband, his hands in the pockets of a jacket that was way too wide for his body. His jeans were full of holes, leaving a good view of his milky thighs which definitely got him a few looks from all sides. Minho was sitting with his back to him, so neither was aware of the other’s presence yet.

Kibum was the first to spot his friend and waved him over, making Minho turn around, just to see Taemin’s gracious figure walking towards them, only a few steps away from their table. Both their eyes grew bigger when their gazes met.

Shit, too late. Minho thought, trying to keep his expressions under control. So did Taemin, because after a second, his face was back to the cold look it had had before.

“You finally get to meet Minho!” Kibum said, watching as the two awkwardly greeted each other with a nod.

“Nice to meet you, I am Lee Taemin” Taemin was the first to speak, and Minho was jealous, the dancer seemed to have no problem pretending to never have met him. He wished he could separate it as well. But he couldn’t, so he just replied shortly.

“Likewise, Choi Minho”

The interaction was short, and Minho hoped it wasn’t too obvious that there was something strange about it, but Jinki just kept eating and so did Kibum.

“I’ll get some water while you guys finish up eating.” Taemin said, turning around and walking away from the table.

“Seriously what is it with you today Choi Minho?” Jinki asked “You are not usually this cold to people, what is up?”

"Nothing. I am just tired." Minho said

"Taemin isn’t usually like this either. I am sorry you got to know him like this. I myself haven’t seen him almost for a week and he looks so tired.” Kibum added, apologizing for his friends behaviour.

“You know what? Ask him right now. Get it over with.” Jinki suggested, making Kibum roll his eyes.

“I cannot ask him in front of other people, privacy, Jinki privacy. What do you expect to happen? I ask him ‘Hey Taem where are you on Thursday nights? Because you can’t be at Jonghyun’s I am not stupid’ and he gives me an answer in front of you guys, I have a certain amount of decency and know that if it were something trivial he probably would have let me know before.” Kibum said.

Neither of the three men seated at the table noticed Taemin coming back, his eyebrows knitted when overhearing the conversation the other three were currently having. To everyone's surprise, Minho spoke up.

“He was with me.” Minho’s deep voice sent shivers down the long-haired male’s spine. “The last few Thursday nights, he has been with me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk if I am doing something wrong here to never get comments but anyway I hope you are enjoying(?) I honestly have no idea if y'all like it ahahahah   
> I'll keep uploading the chapters hahhaha who knows maybe one day someone gives a little feedback OTL


	13. Don't Leave

Should he give Taemin an alibi? While the other two were talking, Minho was worried that if Kibum finds out what Taemin does on Thursdays, the dancer would most definitely be in a difficult position. Once again, his intuition got the better of him and he just said what he thought.

“He was with me. The last few Thursday nights, he has been with me.” Kibum and Jinki, who had just put more food in their mouths froze and looked at the youngest with wide eyes. Minho knew he fucked up when he felt a tight grip on his wrist and got pulled off the bench, leaving two flabbergasted men without another word.

Minho found himself getting dragged away from the table by a furious Taemin whose grip almost hurt. Knowing he shouldn’t have said that, he followed the shorter male without fighting against the tight hold.

When they finally made it to a quiet place, somewhere near the toilets, Taemin stopped to turn around and shoot death glares at the tall male who instantly looked away.

“Explain” Taemin growled. “Why the fuck did you say this?! Do you think this is a joke? Confessing to me pretending you would leave me alone and now you say THIS in front of KIBUM. Do you have any idea what you did?”

Minho knew why the dancer was angry. But after all, he did it thinking about the shorter male. There was barely a better alibi he could have gotten. Kibum was smart after all. He almost felt unreasonably attacked.

“Oh, and you could have come up with a better excuse for your absence?” Minho shot back at him, the younger almost surprised at Minho countering his accusation.

“That is not the point here.”

“It most definitely is the point. Sooner or later you have to explain why you are not home on Thursday nights, and what is better than an alibi with a second person involved who Kibum knows and trusts? He will not question it when I say that I have been with you Thursdays. The timing also works because it started around the time of uhm” Minho started thinking back to the night he spent with Taemin, blushing at the thought. “I mean the party…”

Taemin did not answer so Minho continued.

“You have to admit that you cannot find a better alibi than what I have just given you. But if you want to tell Kibum about your ‘activities’ those nights feel free, I am not keeping you from doing so. Just know that he is highly suspicious of you and is planning to ask you about it in a matter of days.” Minho said, knowing he had Taemin in his hand.

“But, why would you do that? Why would you lie to Kibum and Jinki? There has to be a reason why you would do that, just so I don’t get into trouble with Bum. Just because you're doing this doesn’t mean that I will suddenly feel differently about you. If you are doing this to win me over I have to disappoint you, that’s not gonna happen.” Taemin’s voice was cold but Minho knew that the dancer would go with his plan.

“Do I need a reason? It is not as if you have anything I need. And I can work out my feelings by myself, no need to bring that up, you have made yourself clear enough.”

Taemin looked sceptical for a second and then sighted as if he had his mind made up.

“After the scene we made in the cafeteria I guess I don’t really have a choice, do I?” – Minho just shrugged his shoulders - Jinki and especially Kibum would not let this one go, for sure.

“I am not going to thank you for this since you did it without my consent. But this probably is the best I can get. So, let’s at least adjust our stories and make a few things clear.” Minho nodded, listening to what Taemin had to say, silently excited that the other did seem to like what he had given him, at least partly.

“First of all, don’t expect me to spend that time with you for real. You’ll just have to pretend you are with me and not get caught by either of the others. You are lucky that my contract is over in four weeks. After that whatever story we make up between us ends and we part ways.”

Minho nodded, glad to hear that Taemin wasn’t planning to keep that job up for very much longer.

They came up with a basic story of them meeting outside at the party while smoking, getting along well and then ending up finding a common interest in videogames. The story wasn’t 100% waterproof but it was at least partly realistic that they spent nights battling each other in League of Legends.

“What if they ask why you pulled me with you?” Minho said when they had adjusted their stories.

“Uhm… Well Kibum doesn’t know anything about me liking video games… would it be solid enough to say that I was embarrassed to let him know about this childish interest?”

“Childish?!?!” Minho felt attacked once again

“You know what I mean, it isn’t something that fits my personality.”

“I guess it could work…” Minho said, getting ready to walk back to the cafeteria before he remembered something.

“Give me your phone number” He said, taking his phone out of the back pocket of his pants.

“Why would I give you my phone number? So, you can call me when your ‘feelings’ take over?” Taemin said, obviously annoyed by the older’s request.

“Didn’t I tell you not to bring up my feelings?” Minho started, now just as annoyed as Taemin was. “It is for practical purposes, if one of us has to make up a new story we can let each other know early enough.”

This seemed to be enough and after they exchanged numbers, they got ready to face Kibum and Jinki who had tried to call both of them several times, probably wanting to clear up things.

When they saw the others, who were still at the table in the cafeteria, desperately looking around, searching for their two friends who had rushed away after confessing that they were together on Thursdays.

“Don’t you think it would be better to tell them individually?” Taemin said, hating to be confronted in a public place like this, plus he knew Kibum, and his best friend would hardly believe the excuse they had. Taemin didn’t want Minho to be with them when he explained what happened to Kibum.

“Kibum and I should leave now anyway.”

So, Minho walked over to the sitting couple alone, and after the first looks he got, he told Kibum that Taemin would be waiting outside. No questions were asked so far and Kibum left without another word, still throwing confused looks at the tallest.

Minho sat down waiting for Jinki to ask about what all of this meant.

Kibum was quicker to ask than Jinki was. While the oldest only brought it up after a few minutes of awkward silence, believing the excuse Minho gave, Kibum confronted Taemin the moment he was close enough to the smoking male.

“Lee Taemin. I think you have some explaining to do.”

Taemin just nodded, releasing smoke into the air. Exactly what he had expected.

“I have my needs too, you know?” Taemin said calmly.

“What are you implying here? That you had sex with Minho? He isn’t even gay” The raven-haired male said, trying to follow what his friend was saying.

“Pretty much that, he may not be as straight as all of you think.” A smirk played around Taemin’s lips when he took another puff of his cigarette.

“I cannot believe you.”

“I am not asking you to understand… We have simply spent a few nights together and Minho wasn’t very comfortable with telling that he was fucked by a man. So, we decided not to tell you guys.”

Kibum was thinking for a second while Taemin kept breathing in the thick smoke, waiting for his friend to react to what he said.

“Why Minho though?” the raven then asked, surprising Taemin. He hadn’t really expected this question and therefore tried to come up with a decent reason.

“Would you believe me if I said that I took an interest in him?” He answered Kibum’s question with another one.

“You took an interest in Choi Minho? Tae, when have you ever taken an interest in someone?” Kibum wasn’t easily fooled. “But I do get why you chose him; Minho is definitely one of the attractive guys around. Which doesn’t mean he’s the best one to be around as far as I can say. He’s known for sleeping around weekly, So, what is this?”

“What do you mean what this is?” Taemin asked, throwing what was left of his cigarette on the floor, stepping on it.

“I mean are you guys serious about this? Or what do you mean ‘taken an interest’? I hope you don’t fall for him. He’s a brat, a rich one at that and I doubt that he could seriously care about his flings.”

Taemin casually opened the seat of his motorcycle to take out the helmets, trying to make more time to make up an answer. Even though he wasn’t quite agreeing with what Kibum said, the past had proven Minho to be able to have feelings for someone – if he could believe what the rich boy said, he played along.

“Kim, I thought you know me well enough. I don’t do relationships of any kind. It is just an easy thing, meet up Thursdays, fuck and repeat.”

“hmm” Kibum hummed, sounding slightly disappointed but at least partly convinced.

“Let’s go, otherwise we will be late for your appointment.”

Reluctantly, Kibum took the helmet Taemin was holding out for him.

“Just don’t do anything you'll regret later.”

Next Thursday came around fast, and with it the sixth of 10 nights Taemin was under a contract with Erotes. Tired from practices in the afternoon he was on the way home to take shower and dress up, when a message arrived. There weren’t many people that could be texting him, so he simply guessed it would be Kibum, but when he opened his phone it was in fact a message from Minho.

He sighed. He really did not need to hear any criticism on his work. Knowing it could be related to the cover as well, he decided to open it anyway.

Taemin, it is Minho – Jinki just messaged me, Kibum and him got into a fight and he asked if he could join our gaming session. I couldn’t say no, I am sorry… 

All the fatigue left Taemin’s body and he was wide awake. He instantly pressed the call button, waiting for Minho to take the call.

“Hell-“ Minho couldn’t even properly answer the phone when Taemin already interrupted him.

“YAH, what does that mean?” Taemin spat, people in the subway around him watching him. “What do you mean Jinki is coming over? Are you stupid? You should have told him not to come!”

“Hey, who do you take me for? Jinki is my best friend, what could I have done, he is feeling down, and telling him that he cannot come will definitely be strange and therefore raise suspicion.” Now, Minho was angry as well.

“When do I need to be there?” Taemin gave in, knowing that he should keep up this cover, at least somehow.

“Get your ass over here by 8” Minho said and then ended the call.

This whole situation was so messed up. Even though Kibum knew they were not playing games, he still had to be with Minho on Thursday evenings. There were two scenarios basically: One was, that Taemin wasn’t with Minho and Jinki playing games which would somehow definitely come to Kibum’s ears and trigger the question, where Taemin really was. The second one was that Taemin was there, playing games with Jinki and Minho. That way, Kibum could think that they just simply changed the activity to follow the cover Jinki knew.

Option two was definitely the safer version, but it also means that Taemin could only properly get to work far past midnight, which means less clientele and way less sleep. He also had to call in to cancel or re-schedule the two appointments that were booked for tonight.

“Fuck” he mumbled, trying not to be too loud, he already had several eyes on him. It was clear that he had to go to Minho’s place, the last thing he needed was this cover blown.

After calling Erotes, he got the phone numbers of the two clients that he had an appointment with tonight. And as soon as he had closed the door behind himself and checked if Kibum was really not in the apartment, called the only person that could help him out in this situation.

Gyutae picked up after just two rings.

“Taemin-Hyung? Why are you calling?” The younger asked confused – Taemin has never called him before.

“Uhm…” Taemin started, not quite knowing how to tell Gyutae in a nice way. “I am sorry, but can I ask you for a favour?” he asked, hating himself for dragging the boy into his mess.

“Sure Hyung, anything. Just spit it out”

“Thing is, I cannot come to work early tonight. Something has come up… And I have two sessions scheduled before midnight which I will not be able to make.” While he was saying these words, he was so deeply disgusted by himself, making Gyutae work for him was probably the worst thing he had ever done, but he didn’t really have a choice.

“And you want me to take those appointments?” the younger guessed.

“Only if it is really necessary. First, I will try to re-schedule them. But if they don’t want that I need to give them an alternative… I really hate to ask this of you.”

“Hmm, Well I don’t have any pre-scheduled appointments” Gyutae started before adding “I am not as popular as you” in a teasing manner, turning the situation into a funny one for a second before finishing. “I’ll take them if they don’t want to have their appointment re-scheduled. No worries. Just don’t expect me to give you the money.”

“I would never.” Taemin said. He felt bad enough for making Gyutae taking his clients. Not all of them were gentle. But who could guarantee that the ones the younger would have gotten off the street would have been better? This way, at least, he already had a room and a fixed pay.

“Ah Hyung – you will have to give me some driving lessons in return though.” Gyutae said, making Taemin laugh, the younger one knew how to get what he wanted.

“Sure, no problem, I will let you know as soon as I called the clients.”

With those words, Taemin hung up, hastily dialled the number of the first man, getting ready to offer them another day or a session with Gyutae.

Luckily the first one said it was fine to re-schedule for the next week, only demanding a small discount which Taemin was more than happy to give if it meant not having Gyutae taking care of him. The second one was a harder nut to crack. He wasn’t pleased at all and demanded to have someone else for the night, as well as a session with Taemin later on. When Taemin let him know about Gyutae's personal information, including him being quite a few years younger than Taemin, the man finally sounded satisfied and agreed to the terms.

Taemin couldn’t but accept and messaged Gyutae, with a heavy heart, that one of the customers will be waiting for him tonight.

When it was close to eight, Taemin arrived in the neighbourhood in which Minho lived. He hardly ever got the chance to spend time at places like this. Most of the streets were empty, just a car occasionally passing through while Taemin tried to find the right house. Well house wasn’t exactly right since only a few of the houses were actually visible. Saying he was looking for the right gate was more accurate.

Most of the mansions on this hill were hidden by high fences and walls with only one entrance that had several surveillance cameras focused on heavy doors. The uncomfortable feeling of not belonging here never left Taemin’s chest while he roamed around the place to find Minho’s house.

It was starting to get dark and the wind was blowing, messing up his long hair. It was starting to get even colder and just shortly before he wanted to call Minho to get directions again, because he thought he was lost, he saw a familiar fence, remembering it from the times he brought Minho home.

place was a maze, Taemin thought. Even though he had been here twice before, finding the place was hard, particularly because he was walking and not driving. He had guessed that he would need more than one beer to survive this evening which meant – no driving. 

When Taemin finally stood in front of the familiar door, he took a few minutes to ring the bell. It wasn’t that he was nervous to meet Minho or even Jinki… it wasn’t the gaming that he hadn’t done ever since he was a boy. He wasn’t quite sure what made him stand outside as if he was waiting for a cue to press the button on the side.

He turned around again, standing next to the gate, fishing for a cigarette. For a few more minutes he stood there, leaning against the stone wall, puffing smoke into the fresh evening air while the street lights were shining on him. It was really quiet around here. You could only hear the main street in the far distance, but those sounds were covered as soon as the wind started blowing, making the trees whisper.

It shouldn’t be such a special thing to go gaming at a friend’s place. Most guys met up in PC-Bangs every week, even several times to play games. But Taemin never had the chance to do anything like it. What should be normal was new to the long-haired male who watched the moving trees, whose crowns were visible despite the wall on the opposite side of the street.

When the cigarette had burned down, he wanted to throw it on the floor but stopped mid movement when he saw the ground. The floor was so clean, he almost felt bad for dirtying it with his cigarette. As there was no other way to get rid of it, he threw it on the floor anyway, stepping on it before somehow pushing it to the very corner, hopefully to be left undiscovered.

With one deep breath, getting rid of the smell, he rang the bell. For a while nothing happened, and he almost pressed the bell again when a display to the side of the button lit up and showed the face of some woman.

“Yes?” she said, watching the long-haired male through the camera that was on top of the screen.

“Uhm” Taemin started, unsure of how to react. “I am here to meet Minho?”

The screen turned off and with a small beep, the door unlocked and Taemin walked in hesitantly, looking at his surroundings. He was now standing in front of a stone stair. There were some trees around, and the way was lit up with small lanterns.

He really didn’t feel welcome here at all. But he made himself walk up anyway and was welcomed by Minho’s smiling face that came out of the door when it opened as Taemin approached the place.

“You’re late” Minho said, but the smile did not leave his face. He seemed to like the fact that Taemin was visiting his place. “Oh, and don’t ask Jinki about Kibum, he doesn’t want to talk about it, I have tried already. He’s just here to get his mind off the whole thing. But if you ask me, it doesn’t seem like it is a major fight.”

When they entered Minho’s room, Jinki was already there, surrounded by a few Soju bottles, eating fried chicken while waving to welcome Taemin.

Jinki didn’t seem in too bad a shape, so asking about Kibum didn’t make any sense – he would hear the whole story as soon as he got home anyways. So even if Minho hadn’t said anything about it, Taemin wouldn’t have asked about it. He likes to leave others their personal space without invading it at any point because that is the way he wants to be treated.

The first awkwardness was gone after two bottles of Soju and the three of them finished eating then picked up their controllers.

Minho was surprisingly competitive and won almost every single game and Taemin was glad about that. The one time that Jinki beat him the tall male was furious. They didn’t dare to talk back to him when the latter was cursing about how unfair that game had been. From then on, Minho won all the games and Taemin had the suspicion that sometimes Jinki did not give his best, letting Minho win to avoid another angry break out. The oldest knew how to keep a good atmosphere.

Taemin on the other hand was too bad to win anyway. Of course, he was, most of the games he hadn’t even heard the name of.

“Now I know why you like playing games with Taemin. No way you would ever loose against him” Jinki joked at one point making Minho laugh out loud.

The long-haired male couldn’t really say anything because what Jinki said was true. He really sucked. But besides him doing badly, it was actually a lot of fun. He liked to see Jinki teasing Minho, making the latter blush from time to time. He was simply watching while the two friends were throwing old stories at each other – how Jinki fell down the stairs a few years ago, how Minho had forgotten to buckle his belt when he came out of the club bathroom and many more that Taemin didn’t know.

The atmosphere was comfortable, Taemin didn’t feel like an outsider anymore, he felt like he was part of their friendship, which was a very strange feeling. The only time the air around them got thicker was when Jinki made fun of Minho flirting with Taemin in front of the university gate while the new game was loading.

“That was probably the best moment till now. You should have seen your face.” Jinki was laughing and was then punched on the shoulder by Minho who didn’t find the story as funny as his older friend did.

“You know, if you were gay you would have instantly noticed that Taemin was a dude. I mean look at this nice piece of man.” He said, pointing at Taemin who was sitting on the floor, controller in one hand, soju bottle in the other as he had just wanted to take a sip.

“You flatter me” Taemin said, smirking at Jinki and then bringing the bottle to his lips, taking a long gulp. Some of the liquid escaped his mouth, dripping down to his chin.

Minho on the other hand who was watching the drop moving along Taemin’s fair skin was visibly uncomfortable but before he could change the topic, Jinki continued.

“OH, that just reminds me of something: Did you know that Minho actually kissed a dude before?” the oldest said, making Taemin lift an eyebrow. That wasn’t something he had expected to hear. From what Minho had told him he has been the straightest person on earth.

“SHUT UP” Minho shouted “Jinki, I warn you”

“Ah common, Taemin works at a gay club, no need to be shy about it. It is such a funny story, because we were at that club and there…” Jinki was interrupted by a big massive body that threw himself on him, shutting him up by force.

Deciding that this is a good moment to tease, Taemin spoke up while Minho was busy stopping his friend from telling the story about him being so drunk that he accidently kissed a man on the dancefloor. Jinki had never really told that story to anyone, so why would he do so now?

“Oh, so did you like it? Kissing a man, I mean.” Taemin said enjoying the look he got from Minho.

“None of your business.” The latter said annoyed, but the dancer was sure he saw him blushing.

“So, you did like it.” Taemin said, licking his lips in the process tasting the Soju he had spilled earlier. Minho’s eyes grew wide in fear that the dancer would say anything about their real relationship, but he did not.

“You guys are unbelievable” Minho then said after a few moments of silence – but he didn't say that he didn’t like it which made Taemin’s heart warm for a second before he realised that he acted like a stupid teenager that couldn’t control his hormones.

Despite the many situations of Taemin not being able to join the conversation, because of the lack of knowledge about the stories, the dancer enjoyed every single moment. From time to time they even reminded him of Kibum and himself when there were friendly hits exchanged or they tried to make the other admit to something embarrassing.

Before every new game, both Minho and Jinki took the time to explain how it worked since Taemin hadn’t played any of them before. Sometimes his lack of knowledge surprised Jinki.

“Are you kidding me? You don’t even know how to play Mario Cart? Minho what did you teach him the last few times oh god this is bad.”

Time was passing fast, while Taemin tried his best to keep up with the other two, who were very excited about teaching him about as many different games as possible. God damn Minho’s rich background, that man had access to pretty much every important game there is.

Around half past eleven, Jinki put his controller aside.

“Alright guys thank you so much for keeping me company. I have to be up early, so I will leave first.”

“Whatever you mean old man” Minho joked, making Taemin chuckle.

“You two enjoy the night, I’ll see myself out.” Jinki didn’t notice how Minho winced when he spoke about enjoying the night and disappeared through the door, waving at the two sitting males.

As soon as the door was closed, and they were sure Jinki would not be listening anymore, Taemin spoke up.

“Right in time” Taemin said standing up. He would leave a few minutes after Jinki left, hoping not to run into the older.

“What are you doing?” Minho asked also putting his controller aside

“I’ll be leaving as soon as Jinki is far enough away for us not to cross paths.”

“Why?” Minho asked, hoping to not get the answer that Taemin spoke a second later.

“Still got to make the money, don’t I?”

Then something inside Minho snapped.

“Can’t you just take one evening off? You are killing yourself; don’t you realize?” He spat, angry mostly at himself for not being close enough to Taemin to make him stay.

“I am not killing myself boy. I am making money to survive, but you wouldn’t get that would you?” Taemin gave back.

“This is an awful way to make your money.” Minho said, completely oblivious that this could hurt the younger. It was simply what he had been told all his life. Selling your body for money is bad. There was no grey zone. Maybe Taemin was right, he just didn’t understand how anyone could have this little respect for themselves that they take money for sexual intercourse.

“There is one other thing you don’t get: it is none of your fucking business how I make my money” Taemin said, too tired to argue with the older male. He just wanted to leave this place and meet up with Gyutae whom he hadn’t heard back from yet.

“I am not letting you go tonight” Minho said, holding onto Taemin who was already halfway out the door, locking it behind him, not planning to let the dancer go so soon.

The moment Minho’s hand took a hold of his own, Taemin’s heart jumped for the second time that evening. He didn’t know what was wrong with him, why was Minho’s touch affecting him? He tried to get rid of Minho’s grip that got stronger instantly – almost crushing his wrist.

“I really don’t want to have this conversation again, boy.” Taemin said, too tired to shake off Minho’s hand.

“Then don’t leave” Minho says, his voice now gentler as he realised that Taemin had given up the fight.

“I need to go Minho. I have signed a contract which means I will have to make the money to give to my boss.”

“I’ll give you that money.” Minho said before mumbling “It is not as if I haven’t done it already.”

Taemin sighed. “Listen to me, I am not having sex with people who developed feelings for me. Don’t do this to yourself. Do you think you will be able to get over this when you keep paying for my affection? Do you hope I will fall for you if you do? Because that will not happen, I promise you.” When Taemin said those words, a strange feeling spread through his insides. He wouldn’t. Would he?

“That is not what I…-“ Minho started but Taemin interrupted him once more:

“If that is all, I will leave now.” The dancer said, waiting for Minho to let go of his hand. When he didn’t, Taemin added: “You are not interested in men anyway or did I get that wrong? And I am sorry to break it to you, but I do, in fact, have a penis.”

Minho was quiet for some time but did not let Taemin go. The younger was staring up into his eyes and he was so close to back away, letting Taemin leave.

“Minho, let me go, I went through enough trouble to be here, I cannot leave my friend alone much longer.” Taemin said, giving away all he had. The fact that Gyutae has not sent him a message about how it went yet made his insides crawl and he was worried that something happened. He could never forgive himself if he was the reason for the boy being hurt.

“Your friend?”

“The one you saw when you came to Erotes, he took one of my customers that didn’t want to re-schedule and I haven’t heard back from him.” Taemin sighed, he hadn’t wanted to bring any of this up, but Minho didn’t leave him any choice.

“Oh” The taller just said, his grip on his wrist loosened but didn’t let go completely.

“There you go” Taemin said

“Just…-“ Minho started, looking into the smaller’s eyes. “Can I just… - kiss you? Once?”

For a second, they both froze, Minho thinking he went too far and got ready to take it back, embarrassed to even ask this from the younger, but Taemin was faster.

“You really don’t know your place boy.” He said, treating it as no big deal. It wasn’t – to him at least. So, he pulled up his arm, shoving Minho onto the hard surface of the door, pressing his lips on Minho’s.

Completely flabbergasted by Taemin taking action, Minho froze for a second and then just followed his intuition and opened his lips to give Taemin complete access. But the latter already pulled away before he could even register the taller’s silent request for deepening the kiss.

“I’ll leave now.” The long-haired male said pushing Minho to the side to unlock the door and stepped out into the corridor. Minho had let go of his hand the second their lips touched so he was able to walk away freely.

Minho’s mind was still clouded, and all he could do was watch, when Taemin walked out of his room without another word, his hair moving with his fast steps while he was almost running outside.

For the next few minutes Minho just stood there, inside his room trying to calm down his skipping heart. What he didn’t know though, was that it wasn't just him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The only remaining question is: Will I see anyone in the comments? <3


	14. Broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning:  
> Mentions of non-consensual sex, if you are not comfortable with reading about it: I give a warning before it starts and add a long break when it ends. so DO NOT READ IT. SKIP IT!

Walking back to the subway station was faster than getting to Minho’s house. Not only because he knew the way now but also because he wanted to get away as soon as he could and therefore walked at least double the speed from when he arrived. He knew it was over when Minho asked to kiss him. His subconsciousness had wanted to do so the whole evening, whenever the tall male smiled at either him or even Jinki. And Taemin knew that it was wrong. He shouldn’t feel this way towards the older male. But supressing it didn’t really work.

Oh, how much he wanted to make this kiss longer than he did. But as soon as he had felt Minho leaning into the kiss Taemin needed to pull away. Otherwise he wouldn’t have left. He didn’t trust himself that he would have been able to hold back.

It had gotten even colder outside, the breeze moving his hair all over, messing it up completely. But Taemin did not care. He simply walked faster. The night was already full on and he still had to make the money he has promised to give to his boss.

While in the Subway he tried to reach Gyutae several times but only managed to get through when he was almost at the stop where he needed to get off.

“Oh gosh, I already thought something happened.” Taemin said as soon as the other took the call.

“Hyung, Hi!” Gyutae said on the other side of the line, not sounding too bad.

“How was it? Was he too rough?”

“Don’t worry, actually it was the best job I did this week, he was actually nice, I got a good room at Erotes and he left a pretty good tip. So, no need to worry.” The younger said, making Taemin let out a deep breath as he exited the subway station.

“I am glad to hear that. But anyways, thank you so much for taking over, it really means a lot.”

“No worries. Where are you now hyung?”

“I am at the subway station, are you still at Erotes? I will be there in about ten minutes!” Taemin started walking faster to make it in the promised time.

“Yes, sure, I’ll be waiting.” Gyutae said, hanging up the call.

A few minutes later, Taemin set eyes on the red neon sign and just shortly after, he entered the building, his eyes meeting Gyutae’s, who waved at him happily.

“You were faster than you said!” the younger stated when Taemin was close enough to hear him.

“I couldn’t leave you alone for much longer, could I? I feel bad enough for making you work for me. Sorry I didn’t have any other choice.”

“So, will you be working tonight anyway then?” Gyutae said, pulling Taemin after him over to one of the rooms that were reserved for workers. The older just nodded in Daeun’s direction who was busy answering emails it seemed.

As soon as the door to the small room was closed, Taemin answered Gyutae’s question as he didn’t have the chance to do so before.

“Yes sure, gotta give them the money, otherwise they’ll think I have been working without giving them their share…” Taemin said, letting himself fall onto the sofa which was by the side of the door.

“You look really tired though.” Gyutae pointed out, taking a better look at Taemin’s face. “OH! And did you drink?!”

Taemin just brushed the question off by shrugging his shoulders.

“YAH! Hyung, you yourself told me never to come to work after drinking. You said it's hard to control your limits that way!” the younger looked genuinely worried when he looked at the pale male that hung on the comfortable sofa.

“Well… Sometimes you cannot get around it…”

“That’s just stupid. What did you do this evening then?”

“I really don’t want to talk about that now. You should leave, the last subway will go any time – and I cannot drive you home tonight, I don’t have my motorcycle with me.” Taemin was tired, he barely managed to get up from the sofa but walked out of the room as soon as he stood straight, leaving behind a confused Gyutae.

“This is not a good idea hyung. Just go and sleep in the room, I will get another customer and give you the money. They already have half of what I earned tonight, so just one more customer will do.” The boy followed Taemin outside but now it was Taemin who angrily pushed him back into the room.

“Don’t you dare. This is none of your business. It was a mistake to ask you for this favour anyway, so don’t make this harder on me than it already is. Go home boy.” What started out as a loud scolding got softer and softer, Taemin not wanting to fight with the younger.

“Hyung?” Gyutae said, confused at the older’s behaviour and also slightly intimidated by it, he had never seen Taemin angry until now.

“Please just go home. I don’t want you here now. Let me take care of my own problems, I am the older here.” Taemin almost begged, making Gyutae shut up.

“Alright.” The latter just mumbled, walking past Taemin.

When Taemin finally made it outside, to his delight, there was no sight of the younger male anymore, so he hoped that he had taken his advice and took the last subway home.

It wasn’t long until he found someone willing to pay the price he stated. It was higher than normal since he had to compensate for leaving out the earlier appointments. His sober self would have wondered why the middle-aged man was ready to pay that much money for a single session. But his intoxicated mind did not really think, he was just glad that someone willing to pay the said amount.

But even his drunk-self regretted taking the man’s offer as soon as he set foot into the place he had taken him to. The deal was for one hour and he could do whatever he wanted to do to the long-haired male who was now standing in a dark room which definitely had a little too many whips, ropes and cuffs lying around.

Realizing what he got himself into, Taemin let a little moan slip. He couldn’t be lucky for one time, could he?

“Oh, my little doll is exited. You are so eager; I can’t wait to see you on your knees for me.” The man said, eyeing Taemin with a hungry expression.

“Shit” The long-haired male cursed under his breath, hoping the client wouldn’t hear it, but he did.

“We have a feisty little one here, I better make you shut up then” he said, taking a spider gag that Taemin hadn’t noticed earlier in his hands.

“Open up, doll. Make sure to make it worth my while.”

Taemin didn’t have a choice, so he followed the man’s order, just like he followed every single one after that.

If you are sensitive please don't read the next part - it includes non-consensual sex.

One would think that the alcohol in his blood would lessen the pain, but if that was the case, Taemin didn’t want to know in how much pain he really was. The metal of the spider gag was keeping his mouth wide open, stretching his lips to the fullest, pressing against his teeth painfully while saliva escaped, dripping down his chin.

It was incredibly humiliating to be tied, unable to move while taking the hits of the whip that painfully marked his fair skin. There were lashes all-over his torso and backside, none of them deep enough to ooze blood but strong enough to burn every time the irritated skin came in contact with the rough leather. Whenever the man was pleased, he caressed Taemin's long hair only to pull at it shortly later.

Taemin's hole, through being abused thoroughly, wasn’t unfamiliar to the painful burn, but the man's tight grip on his neck while he thrusted his unlubricated dick inside Taemin's soft warmth was painful, sometimes even cutting off his airflow. It had him gasping for air through his gaping mouth.

The worst though, were his wrists. From the very beginning he had been cuffed to the wall, his hands raised over his head. The cuffs were way to tight, cutting of the blood circulation in his hands and every time the long-haired male struggled, the metal cut deep into his skin, blood oozing out of the abused skin.

By the time the client was done with him, he just sloppily opened the cuffs, Taemin falling forward – unable to hold himself up. At least the man was decent enough to catch him, placing him on the bed that stood on the side, throwing the money next to the boy onto the matrass.

“Get cleaned up over there and then let the man at the front desk know that the room is empty again.” He said with a smirk on his face, admiring his work. “I like you; Not disappointed, your screams were beautiful my doll.”

With those words the man left and Taemin groaned. His mind was cloudy from the pain and the alcohol, but he managed to sit up anyway, his behind hurting from the rough contact with the matrass. It took him a few more minutes to get up and walk over to the small door which hid an even smaller bathroom.

The hot water hurt, but also cleaned off the ugly stains of whatever body fluid was on his body. The lashes on his skin remained as red lines and burned when the hot water met them. His wrists didn’t properly stop bleeding until Taemin patched them up with toilet paper, making improvised bandages.

You can keep on reading from here.

After the shower Taemin felt better, and despite his whole body being sore, his wrists were the only thing really painful. He put on his clothes, counting the money the man had left. To his luck, there was even quite a big tip, so this at least hadn’t been for nothing.

Twenty minutes and a taxi ride later, the long-haired male walked into Erotes to bring the promised money before heading back home. Jonghyun would not be happy to see the injuries on his wrists. That was something he was sure of. He probably would have to wear one of the long-sleeved shirts again and those weren’t really the audience’s favourites.

Completely absorbed in his own thoughts and worries, he put the money on the desk, not even noticing Gyutae who was walking towards him.

“Hyung!” He shouted and Taemin turned around instantly, his mind spinning when he did so.

“What are you still doing here?” the long-haired male said, trying to keep his voice steady, he didn’t need to have Gyutae worrying about him.

“I thought I would wait for you, so we could save on the taxi fare, plus you were only gone for not even two hours, it’s no big deal.” The younger said to reassure Taemin that it hadn’t been a bother to wait for him.

Taemin was tired. He just nodded, not having the strength to fight the younger.

“Alright then let’s go!” Gyutae said, grabbing Taemin’s wrist to pull him along, but the older instantly hissed, pulled his arm away and held onto the now visible bandage with his other hand.

Gyutae’s eyes doubled in size when he saw his hyung in pain and instantly apologized.

“Hyung, I am so sorry. Oh my god, what happened. That looks bad!” He said when his eyes fell on the red that was shimmering through the white of the toilet paper.

“What did that man do to you?!?” he almost shouted but Taemin’s tired face made him shut up very fast.

“It isn’t that bad; he was just a little rough… no big deal. Please, let’s just go home, I am tired.” The older mumbled and Gyutae nodded.

“We’ll just stop by a pharmacy to get this properly bandaged.” He said unfaltering as he knew that Taemin was unable to take care of himself in this state. And before Taemin could argue, he added: “You don’t want these getting infected, do you? Good. Then let’s go.”

There was a 24/7 drugstore not far from where they were, so only ten minutes later, the two of them entered the lit-up place, Taemin falling into a chair, energy completely spent, while Gyutae walked over to the pharmacist who was typing on her phone.

“Excuse me, could you look at my friend’s wrists? They need to be bandaged properly I think.” The boy said, gesturing to Taemin who absentmindedly sat on the grey chair by the entrance.

“Sure, give me a second.”

Shortly later, the girl was holding Taemin’s hands in hers, looking at the cuts on the thin wrists.

“What happened here?” She asked, eyeing the two males suspiciously.

“Uhm, it is a personal issue if you don’t mind.” Gyutae said, hoping the woman wouldn’t ask more questions – and she didn’t.

Just five minutes later, Taemin’s wrists were properly sanitised and bandaged, the two of them leaving the pharmacy, Gyutae helping Taemin to hold himself up.

“Thank you.” The older mumbled when they were finally inside the taxi that was supposed to take them home.

“What’s your address?” Gyutae asked

“Later” Taemin started, eyes heavily lidded. “Let’s get you home first.”

“No way hyung, I will not let you go home alone. End of discussion.”

“But – Kibum…”

“I will be quick I promise, just in out, make sure you are in your bed and leave again, he will not notice me being with you. You told me he is a student, so he would be sleeping now anyway, wouldn’t he?” the younger said, knowing that Taemin was too tired to argue. “So, tell me your address.”

Gyutae instructed the taxi driver to wait for him while he brought his friend upstairs. And soon enough, he was able to open the door to Taemin’s apartment. He had hoped to be able to visit his Hyung’s place in a nicer context but somehow it just turned out like this. Taking off their shoes, Taemin stumbled across the apartment to his room, Gyutae following him closely to make sure he gets to bed properly.

Without changing clothes, the older fell onto his bed, groaning in pain at the rough impact on his sensitive skin.

“Let me just change your clothes, then I will leave.” Gyutae said before undressing the other male, stopping in his tracks when he saw the angry red lines that were scattered across the other’s upper body. Taemin who was already half asleep didn’t really care about the warm hands that dressed him in new, soft boxers and an old shirt. He even shifted comfortably when Gyutae pulled the blanked over the older’s body.

On his way downstairs, the picture of Taemin’s abused body didn’t leave his mind. It seemed that he himself had been pretty lucky with getting clients so far. None had ever treated him like this. To see his usually strong Hyung in this state hurt him, he wasn’t used to seeing him like this and it felt awful to see Taemin this vulnerable. It made him wonder how broken the other male really was.

Jonghyun wasn’t pleased when he saw the state Taemin was in the next day. Even though most of the lashes had faded enough to be covered by a thin layer of make-up, the wrists weren’t in a condition Taemin could hide the injuries. And even more important, they took away most of Taemin’s strength which made it almost dangerous for the dancer to climb a pole.

They rehearsed the routine several times, Jonghyun staying with Taemin in the studio throughout the whole process, hoping they could somehow manage to come up with some changes in the choreography that Taemin would be able to perform tonight. But after two long hours, Jonghyun told Taemin to take the night off.

“I cannot have you on stage like this. I’ll try to get someone to cover for you. You just take care of healing.” The muscular male said, watching as Taemin sat down on the floor.

“I am sorry, I promise I will be fine by tomorrow.” The long-haired male mumbled, opening his ponytail only to pull his hair into a messy bun.

“Taemin, I don’t know what happened, but I need you to be healthy to work here. You are my best dancer and I don’t want you to be in pain so just take care of yourself, I will take care of everything here. Take the weekend off. I will be expecting you again on Monday.” With those words, Jonghyun left the room to organize a substitute for tonight’s performance.

After Jonghyun was gone, Taemin was left alone in the spacious studio, looking at himself in the big mirror on the other side of the room. His eyes stared right back at him, disappointed in what he had become, what life had made him do.

With a look at his old phone he realized that he couldn’t go home already. Kibum would start asking questions for sure if he turned up before midnight. Naturally, his fingers navigated through his contacts, dialling Gyutae’s phone number.

The younger was surprised to receive a call for the second day in a row but answered immediately and the two of them set to meet up for dinner half an hour later.

Taemin had chosen a small SamgeTang place to treat Gyutae to dinner, to thank him for bringing him home the night before. He told himself it wasn’t only because he didn’t have anyone else to meet.

“Thank you so much for inviting me!” Gyutae said when they sat at the table, choosing what they wanted to get off the menu that was pinned onto the wall.

“No worries, you were a big help yesterday, so thank you.”

“Anyways, what happened that you couldn’t come to work on time, if I may ask?” Gyutae knew for a fact that the last thing Taemin wanted was to talk about what happened to him last night. If he were in that situation, he would hate to be asked about it and also, he wasn’t sure if he even wanted to know what exactly happened. Maybe it was better if he didn’t. Talking about something else seemed to be the best option.

Taemin sighed and then told Gyutae the whole story about Minho, only being interrupted by an Ajumma taking their orders.

“So, did I catch that correctly: That really handsome dude that came by Erotes likes you?” the younger asked when Taemin had finished, ending the story with yesterday evening and how he had to be at Minho’s place to keep up his alibi.

“Are you serious? The only thing you care about it freaking Choi Minho’s feelings for me?”

“Why are you blaming me now? It was pretty much what you focused on most, except for the whole ‘Kibum-will-hate-me-if-he-knew-that-I-am-selling-my-body-part’.” Gyutae gave back right before their food arrived.

“Well, it is quite a big part of the whole dilemma because the boy just won’t leave me alone and keeps getting involved in everything without permission.” The younger watched as Taemin started eating instantly, burning his mouth with the hot soup, just to have an excuse to not make up an excuse for talking about Minho.

“Hyung, didn’t you say he is older than you? So why are you calling him a boy?” Gyutae decided to ignore the poor excuse because he knew that it made the older male uncomfortable to talk about it.

“Because he is an immature boy who doesn’t know how it is to be followed by bad luck wherever one goes.” He drank some water to soothe the burned tongue, before continuing. “You should have seen his house, I tell you, I don’t think his room could fit in our apartment. And from what I heard he doesn’t care about his studies at all. Isn’t life funny? Those who would give everything to go to a good school, get a degree and have a proper job are stuck with the misery that has followed them all their life while those who are getting the education one could only wish for don’t appreciate it a single bit and slack off – only worrying about their next fuck.”

Taemin was barely taking a break while talking, letting out all the frustration he had kept inside for as long as he could think. He didn’t even tell Kibum about his secret desire to study. Even though he had never been smart during his time in middle school and then high school – he hated that place -, as he got older, the desire to get a degree in anything looked incredibly appealing. Even better if it was in dance, but everything would have been fine. Sadly, life didn’t give him the opportunities he had wished for.

Gyutae was attentively listening while deliciously eating the meat off the bones in his soup, watching Taemin’s eyes stare into the distance as he was immerged in his thoughts.

“And somehow, my luck wanted me to be one of the best fucks he ever had, making me his ultimate target. He just doesn’t know that there is nothing else I can give him.” Taemin continued after picking a piece of potato out of his bowl. “I just hate how he takes everything for granted.”

“So how about you?” Taemin looked up at Gyutae who suddenly spoke, waiting for him to complete his question. “Was he the best fuck you have ever had?” the younger then added with a smile, trying to change the older’s sad expression. His plan worked, and annoyance spread over Taemin’s face.

“This is what you get from this Gyutae-ya??You aren’t even legal, how dare you ask stuff like this?!”

“Hyung, I am nothing but innocent, I work as a freaking prostitute – but you are avoiding my question, was he good then?” Gyutae said, keeping his voice low, he didn’t need the whole restaurant knowing about their work.

“You are unbelievable.” The long-haired male said and kept eating, when the younger was still watching him, waiting for an answer to his question, he added: “And don’t even expect me to answer that question. I have fucked more people than you can count, so rating them is impossible. It was nothing special.”

“Well you did, somehow, just answer my question though, hyung.” Gyutae said, earning a stare from Taemin who kept eating, knowing that he did. But was what he said the truth? He wasn’t even sure himself.

Over the remaining time, neither of them talked much and only after they finished their food Taemin brought up another topic that had been on his mind for a few days.

“I wanted to ask you something: have you ever thought about dancing?” the long-haired male asked.

“No, not really, I have never been interested in it.”

“I would like you to try out performing at the club I work at. It isn’t perfect, but at least better than what you do now. I could teach you and put in a good word for you with Jonghyun.” Taemin said. He had thought about this ever since the session they had together. He knew that the other was flexible and he was still young enough to be trained easily. It seemed like a better option than to keep selling his body to random men.

“Oh” Gyutae said, surprised at the sudden suggestion. It wasn’t that he liked what he was doing now, but he never thought about getting away from it ever since he started a few months back. Prostitution seemed like the only thing he could do to earn the needed money for him to support himself. Being offered a way out of the world of sex-work, confused him.

“You don’t need to decide tonight, but my offer stands, and I can get you anytime and take you with me to the studio. I am alone there on Sunday and Monday, so message me when you decide to try it out.”

“I… I don’t really know what to say” The younger mumbled, the bubbly boy suddenly shy. “Are you sure I could dance?”

“Well, we will have to see about that – but we can only know if you try.” Taemin said, giving the other an uplifting look.

“I guess, it is not as if I have anything to do during the day.”

They left the restaurant a little after 10pm, Taemin guessing he could accompany Gyutae to Erotes and then go home slowly to avoid running into Kibum. But he guessed that the latter would have either made up with Jinki already and therefore be at his place, or he would be sleeping by midnight – like the responsible student he was.

He waved goodbye to the younger who disappeared behind the glass doors of the building he despised so much.

Taemin was glad that Gyutae wasn’t completely avoiding the idea to start dancing. Who knows, maybe he even had a bit of talent – and even if he didn’t, Taemin was confident enough that he would be able to make the younger into a decent dancer.

He arrived in his neighbourhood shortly past midnight after stopping by a pharmacy to get new bandages for his wrists. Hoping that Kibum would be asleep, he entered the elevator of their apartment building.

But as fate wanted it, Kibum was still awake, turning around to face the door as soon as he heard someone entering the passcode. His expression changed when he saw that it was Taemin who entered, and the latter seemed to be just as surprised to see him awake.

“Tae? Why are you home already? Did something happen?”

“Uhm…” Taemin started, taking off his shoes slowly to have more time to think of a good excuse for him already being home.

“I wasn’t feeling too well today so Jonghyun gave me an earlier performance, so I could get a good night of sleep.” He lied, hoping that Kibum would believe him.

“Oh, are you sick?” The older male said, getting up from the chair he had been sitting on, reading texts.

“No, no.” Taemin said instantly, not wanting Kibum to come any closer. “I just felt a little nauseous earlier.”

“Well, you are old enough to take care of yourself.” The raven-haired male gave in. “Can I just talk to you for a second?” he then added, sitting back down, Taemin following his example.

“Of course.” The latter said as he sat down on the second chair.

“I had a fight with Jinki… And I really don’t know how to fix it. I mean I didn’t do anything wrong. All I told him was that I am thinking of going back to work once a week.”

“You did what?” Taemin interrupted in disbelief.

“What is it with the two of you? This is my life, so why do you care about what I do with it?” Kibum sounded angry that his best friend wasn’t on his side, but what had he expected? Taemin had already opened his mouth to say something but the older continued his monologue.

“Do you have any idea how I feel like living off your money? I want to at least contribute to the housing cost. I feel like a child that is taken care off by his mother, which in this case would be you, a friend that is even younger than I am. I started dancing and making my own money with it because I wanted to be independent – and look where that got me: Living off of you. I know that you mean well. But I can’t keep going on with this.”

“Kibum” Taemin tried but the other kept talking.

“And then Jinki said, that he didn’t want me doing such a dirty job!!! Can you imagine? He said what I did for a living is a DIRTY JOB. He even met me there, he should be the one ashamed that he hooked-up with a ‘dirty sex-worker’. I am just so disappointed in him, I thought he would be accepting of what I did – because it basically was the reason we met.”

“Kibum”

“I just wished he would understand why I want to go back and make my own money, accept it and support me like a boyfriend is supposed to do.”

“KIM KIBUM” Taemin now shouted, getting the other’s attention and probably waking the neighbours in the process. “Just shut up for a second.”

“I am sorry, it is just hard for me to understand. Why you guys want me to depend on your money.”

“Kim, I don’t want you to depend on my money, I want you to focus on your studies. As for Jinki, please put yourself in his position, if you were him, would you like your boyfriend stripping and dancing sexually in front of strangers in exchange for money? Think carefully, if it were Jinki, would you like him going back?”

“This is not fair.” Kibum said and Taemin knew he had already won.

“So, you wouldn’t like him going back.” The younger answered his own question, watching Kibum’s face fall as the latter gave in.

“Now that you understand your boyfriends point of view, I just have one question: why don’t you just look for another part-time job? I mean something normal – working in a restaurant for example.”

“I just…” Kibum started but had no idea how to finish the sentence he just started, so he tried again. “I… I never really thought about doing anything else… I hate you Lee Taemin, why do you always make me into the bad guy…”

“I am not making you into the bad guy.”

“Yes, you are.”

“Oh gosh, Kibum are we really going there? I am really tired – and you should talk to Jinki to apologize.” Taemin got up from the chair, having done his job as Kibum’s friend by beating some sense into the overdramatic guy.

“I’ll occupy the bathroom for a few” with those words, he left the raven-haired male sulking at the table, closing the bathroom door after him.

When he was alone in the bathroom, he took out the plastic wrapped bandages, taking off the old ones. Besides the cuts, the wrists were now also heavily bruised, shimmering in several shades of purple, blue and green. With a deep sigh, he placed the sanitiser he had bought on the sink before grabbing his toothbrush. The lady in the pharmacy had told him it was important for the cuts to get some air before bandaging them anew, so the three minutes he was brushing his teeth must suffice. He couldn’t walk out with his wrists displayed as long as Kibum was around.

“Tae?” Kibum said on the other side of the door.

“What now?!” the long-haired male said, toothbrush in his mouth, just barely able to articulate.

“You’re brushing your teeth? I am just going to grab my hairbrush real quick” the other said opening the door without waiting for an answer.

Taemin had gotten rid of his toothbrush and tried to hold the door closed but it was already too late. Kibum was inside and his eyes found the heavily bruised wrists, widening in shock at what he saw.

There was a moment of silence while the older tried to get over the first shock and Taemin panicked inside. He had no idea how he would get out of this situation.

“What’s that.” Kibum said, his voice cold like ice a few seconds later. It didn’t even sound like a question, more like an order to tell him what happened. When Taemin kept silent, he exploded.

“Lee Taemin WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE?!?!?”

“I…” The long-haired male started, adrenalin pumping through his veins.

“I won’t ask again. Where did you get those?” Kibum growled.

“Uh… Minho is into these kind of things…” Taemin came up with the simplest excuse he could think of. “You know, BDSM and such…”

“Minho is into BDSM you say?” the older said, sounding everything but convinced.

“He – He doesn’t really want it going around, so don’t tell Jinki, alright?” Taemin was glad that his friend had bought the poor explanation, his insides relaxing again, adrenalin slowly leaving his system.

“Sure, I won’t tell.” The raven-haired male said in a sad tone, taking his hairbrush and leaving the bathroom without another word.

Taemin didn’t know that Kibum knew exactly what BDSM-bruises looked like. The older had seen them on his own wrists many times. The ones on Taemin’s definitely aren’t the result of a regular bondage session. Moreover, they were marks that looked painful, the bruises of someone who struggled against the restraints. Marks of rape.

That night, Kibum cried himself to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> Hello my dear readers!
> 
> There is absolutely no 2min in this one, I am sorry - but I feel like it was important to get a little view into Taemin's life. Also I have to slowly resolve all the things that are around, starting with Kibum knowing about what really happens Thursday nights. So, be prepared for some drama after the OnKey special that is coming up next chapter.
> 
> Stay tuned for more! And I am so happy to see that some of you have decided to comment >< please keep that up! like seriously, it feel so good to get some feedback.
> 
> XX
> 
> R
> 
> PS: For everyone who craves a little fluff after this depressing chapter, I wrote a small oneshot about nerd 2min and their first kiss. I cringe whenever I read through it, but who doesn't like a little cuteness in dark days?  
> You can find it Here


	15. These Kinds of Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter note:  
> Since I don't want to spoil anything of the original storyline, there will be no mentions of things that happen around the OnKey couple.  
> In case you like this, there is a continuation of this side story with a little more BDSM basics on my profiles (These kinds of things)  
> I'll shut up now and let you read some Onkey!

The next morning, Kibum couldn't think about anything but Taemin’s bruised wrists. Whatever the relationship between Minho and Taemin was, he worried that it might be an abusive one, Minho doing things to his friend that the long-haired male didn’t want. Despite the fight they had, he really needed to talk to Jinki, so the two of them met up later in the afternoon, it was Saturday after all.

They were sitting in a café in Gangnam and were talking out the whole working issue, Kibum giving in, saying he will look for a different part-time job. Things were fine - before the raven-haired male brought up what was on his mind ever since yesterday evening.

“I want to ask you something., Taemin and Minho will probably hate me, but I really cannot keep this to myself.”

“That sounds serious... whatever you need to know… If I can help I will.”

“Do you know anything about Minho’s sexual interests? Has he ever been into BDSM?” Kibum said, making his boyfriend choke on his iced americano.

“Holy, what does that have to do with anything? And no, I don’t”

“The thing is, Taemin and him met after your birthday party and ever since then they have spent Thursday nights with each other.”

“Yes, they have videogame battles - I know, and now?” Jinki said, confused that this was an issue.

“Well not exactly, they seem to be in a sexual relationship.” Kibum answered. Jinki though, didn’t seem to believe a single word his boyfriend said.

“Don’t be ridiculous. Minho isn’t even gay, plus I was with them two days ago and they did nothing but play games.”

“You were there? Did you leave first?”

“Yes, I did, but they would never, would they?” Jinki said

“I have no idea actually but if I can believe what Taemin says, they had sex several times already – and not too gentle sex either.”

“So, what are you getting at? That Minho and Taemin are in a BDSM-ish relationship or whatever you call that?”

“No, what I am saying is that I saw Taemin’s wrists, highly abused, bruised from struggling in metal cuffs. They were bloody, Jinki. Bloody. I am afraid that Minho could be abusing Taemin.”

“Oh, he would never do that. Trust me. I mean he is an ass when it comes to sex, but he doesn’t do anything without the other person agreeing. So, even IF Minho is into BDSM… Maybe they both like it. How can you be so sure that those aren’t regular cuff marks? I mean I don’t know how that stuff works but I can imagine it getting pretty rough.”

“Jinki I know. I have been into these kinds of things, and this is not how cuff-inflicted bruises are supposed to look like if it is consensual action.”

“What do you mean, you know because you have been into these kinds of things?” Jinki asked, not following what Kibum was saying.

“Do you know anything about BDSM?” The raven-haired male asked back. This conversation had taken another turn. Kibum didn’t want to expose his past like this, but maybe this was a good moment to let the older in.

“Just roughly what it stands for, but I have never really wanted to know what it is actually about. But why is that important now?”

“So, you know that the letters represent Bondage, & Discipline, Dominance& Submission, Sadism & Masochism.”

While Kibum was speaking, Jinki seemed to get more nervous, finally putting one and one together, shifting slightly in his seat when Kibum said the last two words which he didn’t know were included in BDSM.

“So, what are you getting at?” He asked, even though he knew, Jinki wanted to make sure he understands this right.

“When I graduated high school, I was already highly sexually active and had found interest in the BDSM field. So, I ended up going to the only place known for BDSM here in Seoul, trying out uhm… several things.”

While Kibum was talking, Jinki listened, visibly uncomfortable with the new information he was getting. He had known about Kibum’s previous job and it didn’t really bother him, after all it was something that could bring him benefit in bed. But this made him incredibly self-conscious. If Kibum used to be into bondage and things, wouldn’t their sex-life bore the younger? What if Kibum was bored with the plain sex that they had together, what he if he was bored by him?

“YAH Jinki, are you listening to me?” Kibum said, noticing the older that had spaced out.

“Yes, sure… But why did you not tell me before?”

“It’s just that I was afraid, you would feel burdened by the fact that I had a dom for over a year… I mean of course you should know about past boyfriends, but the relationship we had was purely sexual and I didn’t really know how to bring that up.” The younger confessed, scratching his head.

Meanwhile, when Kibum spoke about having a dom, Jinki’s eyes widened, he really hadn’t listened before and that information came as a surprise. The older swallowed heavily, knowing he couldn’t be shocked now, when, in Kibum’s eyes, he had been very alright with the fact that he had a dom before.

“So, uhm… I am not really familiar with these kinds of things…” Jinki confessed. “So, what exactly does that…. - include?”

“Oh” Kibum said. He didn’t expect he would have to explain what the relationship between a dominant and submissive is about, but he was more than glad to do so.

“The dom is the dominant in the relationship, while the sub is the submissive. So, on a very basic level, the dom can do whatever he wants with the submissive as long as it brings pleasure to both of them, and in return for the sub’s obedience the dom takes care of the sub.”

It took a few seconds for Jinki to swallow this, he hadn’t heard much about dom-sub relationships and the thought of Kibum submitting to someone completely was unfamiliar.

“So, I take it you were the sub?”

“Yes.”

“And you had one person ordering you around for over a year?”

“You are making it sound like I didn’t want it…” Kibum said, completely oblivious to the fact that those ideas were completely new to his boyfriend. “And it wasn’t one, did you really listen to what I said before?” The raven-haired male’s eyebrow lifted, knowing that in fact, Jinki hadn’t been listening.

“Not one?”

Kibum sighed “There have been a few, but the longest I have been with one was a little over a year.”

“Oh” Jinki just said, not quite knowing how to react to this. So, Kibum had been in several sexual relationships with people, submitting to them completely. It was no question anymore if the younger was bored with their sex-life, Jinki was now sure he was.

“I see” The older then added when Kibum stayed quiet.

“I am sorry for not telling you, I thought it would make you uncomfortable, it is not that I am ashamed of it – I am not. – but just know that you are all I need. I am so glad to have you as my boyfriend and I would not exchange you for any dom in the world.”

Jinki just absent mindedly nodded and the talk was mostly over. After a few awkward minutes they had to part ways anyway, both of them leaving to go back home.

From that day on, Jinki was highly self-conscious whenever he made love to Kibum and he was pretty sure that the other noticed. He also started watching porn that included several different BDSM aspects but except for bondage and some basic toys he could barely find any pleasure in any of them.

Hitting your lover sounded awful to him, inflicting pain – he could not even think about it. He wanted Kibum to feel good and he could not imagine how being spanked with a whip could make anyone feel good. Sometimes he stumbled across videos that he clicked away as soon as they started, he never knew how many strange things were out there. These made him wonder how many of these things Kibum has tried. He could barely imagine his boyfriend dressed up as a dog crawling on the floor for his master.

With these thoughts he closed his laptop, letting out a deep sigh. Should he give it a try? Should he ask Kibum if he wanted to teach him about it, so he could follow his boyfriend’s preferences? What if he was bad at it? What if he hated it? Would he be able to tell Kibum?

A few weeks later, it was Kibum who brought it up. They were together in bed in Jinki’s apartment, the older holding the raven-haired male in his arms lovingly.

“Jinki.” Kibum said, shifting onto his side, so he could look at his boyfriend’s face, holding himself up with one arm, head placed on his hand.

“Yes?” Jinki looked down at the other’s sweaty face, Kibum’s hair was falling into his eyes messily.

“Does it still bother you?”

“What?”

“Me being familiar with the BDSM-scene”

Jinki didn’t answer for a while, not wanting to hurt the other male, but if he were to be honest, it did bother him quite a bit.

“You know, you haven’t really been with me while we were having sex for the last few weeks and I am not stupid, I was just hoping that you would bring it up by yourself… You didn’t though, so I decided to do it instead.” Kibum continued when he realized that the older was not going to start talking anytime soon.

“I am just afraid that I am boring you.” Jinki admitted shortly after, hiding his face behind his messy hair.

“Oh gosh Jinki, I told you, didn’t I? I love you. And I love everything about us, including the sex.”

“But I am not…-“ Jinki started but was interrupted by the raven-haired male as soon as he started.

“No buts, I never did expect you to share the same sexual interests with me. Yes, I do enjoy being dominated by someone during sexual intercourse, but I love being with you even more. If you ever want to try something you can always tell me, but I would never want you to pressure yourself into doing something you don’t enjoy merely because you think I would enjoy it. The most important thing in BDSM is for both parties to like what they are doing and by forcing yourself, you would break the number one rule without even starting.” Despite Jinki’s several tries of saying something, the younger just kept speaking.

“I love you; I love the sex I have with you. And most importantly I love your love for me. I never experienced something like this with anyone, I have never had anyone make me feel this way, so never ever think of yourself at not worthy or that you must change yourself to please me. I love you just the way you are.”

By now the older almost had tears in his eyes, perplexed at Kibum’s excessive declaration of love.

“I love you too. So much” He then said, pulling the other male closer again, pressing the latter close to his chest, the raven-hair tickling his nose.

“I would be willing to try though.” Jinki then added after a few minutes of silence.

“Sorry what?” This was the last thing Kibum expected and he looked at his boyfriend with wide eyes.

“I said, I would be willing to try. I have looked at some videos…”

“You didn’t oh my god.”

“And maybe there are some things that I could find pleasure in, I just haven’t experienced any of them, so I don’t really know…” the older was stumbling over his words, making the raven-haired male smile.

“Are you serious?” the younger beamed – the idea of Jinki taking care of him was just to good to be true. He couldn’t imagine the pleasure he would find when the love of his life did the things to him he had already loved when it was a random partner doing them.

“What would you be interested in to try then?”

“Oh… uhm” Jinki was shy instantly, talking about it was more embarrassing than he had thought.

“No need to be shy, it isn’t as if we never had sex, and to me many things are familiar so no need to be embarrassed. I am the last who can judge you.”

“I mean… most of the things I don’t really get, but I think I could enjoy the bondage part…” Kibum’s eyes lit up as soon as he heard the word bondage, making Jinki blush even more, his face now deep red.

“Are you serious?”

“If it is with you then yes.”

“No really, I don’t want you doing this because you want to please me. I am asking if you seriously want to do this.” Kibum’s face was completely serious, almost intimidating. Jinki nodded – he did want to try, they could always stop if he doesn’t enjoy it.

“Say it.”

“Yes, I want to try, but you will have to teach me. I don’t know anything about it” Jinki said, more comfortable than before after he realized that, indeed, this topic wasn’t awkward to Kibum at all. The younger didn’t seem to care that Jinki liked the thought of tying him up, actually he seemed to like it.

“Oh, babe. I don’t think I am the right person to teach you. I am not very familiar with the technical skill it needs for most of the knots.”

“So how do we do this? Are there tutorials or something?” Jinki said, embarrassed that he didn’t know how this was supposed to work. It took a second for this comment to sink in and when it did, Kibum started laughing out loud.

“You are adorable.” He said, loving his boyfriend’s flushed expression. “I know someone who can teach you the knots we need. So, if you are willing to learn, I will organize a meeting.”

If he was honest, Jinki didn’t quite know what he got himself into. But a strange feeling spread through his insides when he followed his boyfriend down narrow stairs that ended in a surprisingly warm room. The room per-se wasn’t anything special. There was a small desk by the side without any worker around, a few photographs of city alleys on the walls, a few chairs and a small table in a corner.

“So, this is where…?” Jinki whispered, not finishing the sentence.

“Why the heck are you whispering?” Kibum laughed and started explaining everything to the slightly intimidated male.

He pointed at the desk, explaining that in the evening there would be someone welcoming guests there, they could register with all their preferences to find a suiting partner or they could come in pairs and rent out rooms. From what Jinki understood the place basically offered several, differently equipped, rooms which could be rented for a night, and at the same time it functioned a little like a dating agency – only that the goal wasn’t to find a lover, but someone who enjoyed the same kinks.

“And here behind this door…” Kibum walked over to a glass door and opened it. Behind the door was a long corridor with many other doors on the sides. “Here we have the different rooms. There are some more behind the other door next to the desk, but those are for more intense practices, so no need to bother with that one.”

Jinki just attentively listened to his boyfriend speaking. He had to admit that this was slightly exiting, plus he was really glad that there was no one around besides them, he would probably die from embarrassment if he was seen here.

“The guy who will be helping you with the basics already sent me the key, so we can go inside to get you familiar with everything. He will be here around four.” The raven-haired male pulled out a key, opening the third door on the right which had a golden metal plate with the number 5 on it.

“So, you are sure you want to do this?” The younger asked before opening the door.

“Yes, I am” Jinki said and Kibum opened the door, revealing the room behind it after turning on the light.

To Jinki’s surprise, the ceiling of the room was higher than the one in the corridor, and the light that came from the fake torches on the stone walls was very warm, making the room almost look cosy if it weren’t for the beams which were covered by different kinds of toys, some of them looking familiar, some not.

The room wasn’t incredibly big, but bigger than expected, having enough space for a wooden four-poster bed and several smaller pieces of furniture including something that looked like a bench they used to jump over in PE-class.

There were several sizes of different coloured pieces of rope on one wall, some more were hanging from the beams of the bed. There was so much to take in, including a body sized golden mirror next to the bench-thing and a wooden chest that was probably filled with things Jinki didn’t want to see.

The entire time Jinki stood there in the entrance, Kibum just quietly stood next to him, the key in is hands, giving his boyfriend time to get accustomed with the new surroundings.

This always used to be his favourite room out of the 18 that were available in this place. Each and every one was different in size, was themed differently and also had varying equipment. Having tried out many things, somehow, he always ended up back in room number 5, it just was the most comfortable to him, so he decided to bring Jinki here.

While they were waiting, Kibum roughly explained a few objects that the older asked about, the latter listening attentively. It seemed that most of the nervousness had faded by now and Kibum really liked seeing the other interested in these things.

Then, while Kibum was explaining the different floggers and whips, Jinki watching from the bed – not quite as comfortable as he had been when they were talking about the ropes, a knock was heard at the wooden door. It opened just a second after, a tall man entering the closed space.

“Sangyeon! You are here!” Kibum greeted the man but was ignored as Sangyeon’s attention was on the shocked male that sat on the bed, staring right back at him. There was a moment of silence before both said at the same time:

“YOU?!”

Now Kibum was confused as well, how could it be that Jinki knew his past dom? He could not think of any connection the two of them could have.

“Sorry, but why do you know each other?” The raven-haired male asked instantly.

“I… uhm…” Jinki started unable to form a sentence – this was too much of a coincidence.

“He sucked me off in a bathroom once.” Sangyeon said without any shame.

“You did – excuse me – what?” this time it was directed only at Jinki.

“It was before I knew you… well actually the night we met. He took Minho and me to the club you were working at…”

“The world really is small; I didn’t think you would keep him around Bum. I am glad you did though. Can’t say I am not jealous, that would be a lie.” Sangyeon said, sounding slightly amused while smirking at Jinki who blushed. Kibum, in protection mode, pulled Jinki from the bed by his hand, and then put his arms around the older’s shoulders.

“I will trust you not to hit on my man.” He said, in a joking tone that clearly was serious.

“Who do you take me for?”

“A fucking pervert”

“Well that wasn’t nice, was it?” Sangyeon gave back amused by Kibum being so protective of someone. He didn’t know the raven like this. Back then, he would always be up for sharing if one of them took an interest in a third party.

“Just clearing grounds.” Kibum said, pressing a kiss on Jinki’s cheek.

“Are you done clearing grounds? Because if you are, I would like to start with what I am here for.”

They got started soon after the first awkwardness was over. Turns out, that Sangyeon had been with Kibum for over a year and had introduced him to Jonghyun back in the days, who immediately hired him as a dancer.

Despite the other two making no big deal out of the whole thing, Jinki still felt slightly uncomfortable. It was strange to be acquainted with Kibum’s past dom, knowing what their relationship had been about. But as soon as the tall male took out several different ropes, his attention was on those only. If Jinki did something, he wanted to do it right - and having heard that it is easy to hurt someone in a bondage session, he needed to pay attention, so he wouldn’t hurt Kibum.

While Sangyeon took his time to explain several knots and the basics on how to place the ropes on someone’s skin, Kibum left the room several times, coming back with drinks or food while Jinki did his best to follow the instructions Sangyeon gave, using his own or Sangyeon's wrist to wrap the rope around.

After a few hours, Sangyeon was content with Jinki’s skills, he went outside for a moment, leaving Jinki alone who was diligently practicing the few knots he had been taught. Shortly after, he came back, Kibum following him inside.

“Alright, do you want to try it out now?” Sangyeon asked.

“Wait? What? Now?” Jinki was utterly confused, he hadn’t expected he would be allowed to apply what he had learned so fast. “I don’t think I am confident enough. I don’t want to hurt you” The last part was directed at Kibum who looked at his boyfriend lovingly, touched by Jinki’s words.

“Don’t worry, I will be here to supervise and help you.” Jinki’s eyes got bigger when Sangyeon said that, imagining the tall male watching him while he put ropes around his boyfriend’s body. He looked over to Kibum who nodded to signal that he is alright with that, Jinki guessed Sangyeon had asked Kibum beforehand as the raven-haired male didn’t look surprised. Or maybe it was just something that was very normal to people who are familiar with these kinds of things - that you have someone with you in the beginning to make sure of the sub’s safety.

Not wanting to hurt the younger, he tried to ignore the fact that there would be another person watching him while he touched his boyfriend and agreed to the idea.

Kibum looked very excited. He tried to hide it but Jinki knew his boyfriend well enough to be able to tell that the younger really liked the idea of Jinki tying him up and wasn’t bothered to have Sangyeon around for it.

“Alright, so what do you want to try?” the tallest asked Jinki who blushed immediately.

“I don’t know… I… can you just decide on what you want to do?” Jinki asked Kibum who just smiled back.

“Jinki, that’s not how this works, you are supposed to be the dominant, you are the one to choose. Don’t worry I am fine with whatever, Sangyeon wouldn’t teach you things I don’t like.”

They both looked at him, waiting for Jinki to decide giving him encouraging looks. This was harder to do than he thought.

“Then how about the second one you told me about?”

“The Hog-Tie?”

“Yes.”

“Sounds good. So, what do you need to pay attention to here?” Sangyeon asked, testing if Jinki remembered everything before he let him start.

“Pay attention to the sub's face since it could be buried in the sheets making it hard to breathe, don’t tie the hands too tight since they will be pulled back which tightens the knot. Take the rope double, so it doesn't cut into the skin as hard as when it is only one string and tie the final knot at the feet on the opposite side, so he cannot open it by bending back.”

“Very good.” Sangyeon praised, making Kibum slightly proud that his boyfriend had remembered everything correctly. They were standing next to the bed, from where Sangyeon picked up a rope.

“Since you don’t have an official safe-word yet, let’s just go with the colours for now until you have chosen one for you. To repeat: Green means you are safe, Yellow – almost at the limit, maybe cut some slack or don’t go any further, and then red for immediate stop of everything. As for the non-verbal sign, in case Kibum is unable to speak, two snaps of his fingers mean immediate stop, one is to tune it down. Do you understand?”

“Yes”, both Kibum and Jinki said in unison.

“Good, then tell him to undress” the tallest said, Jinki following his orders and Kibum, without any shame, did as he was told. Both men had seen his body countless times anyway, so no need to be shy.

Jinki got accustomed to it faster than he thought he would. It wasn’t as strange to see his boyfriend’s gorgeous naked body in the presence of another person as expected.

Knowing how it worked, the raven-haired male turned around, facing the bed, and held his arms behind his back, hands resting just above the toned, milky globes of his ass, to give Jinki access to tie them together.

Sangyeon took a step back to watch his student wrap the folded rope around Kibum’s wrists, only stepping in once or twice to straighten it in a few places.

Jinki was so focused on getting everything right, he didn’t notice Kibum closing his eyes, and the goose bumps that covered all of the naked male’s body. The younger had closed his eyes as soon as the rope in Jinki’s hands had touched his sensitive skin. Not that he would tell Jinki, but he had missed this feeling. Now, to have the man he loved doing this for him, he couldn’t help but shiver in pleasure and happiness.

Kibum felt how nervous the older was, his movements were unsure and when he closed his eyes, he thought he could even feel Jinki’s hand tremble slightly while he wrapped the blue rope around his wrists. Kibum had had many people tying his hands like this, but never had it felt this intimate, this loving.

“Can you get out of this?” Jinki asked, his voice surprisingly stable, when he was done.

Kibum wiggled his hands, noticing how well the older had done. It wasn’t too tight but tight enough for him to not be able to shake the rope off.

“No” He said answering the question.

“Is it too tight?”

“No”

Another shudder run down Kibum’s spine. He hadn’t known that Jinki had this side in him. The older was asking him perfectly, in a low but clear voice, almost ordering him to answer. This made the raven-haired male wonder if Sangyeon had taught Jinki about this while he was gone, or if he just followed his instincts.

“Lie down.” Again, it sounded like an order and Kibum almost slipped a moan at his boyfriend’s demanding voice which he had never encountered before.

His arms immobile, he just fell forward into the soft mattress. The rough contact of his privates with it made him hiss for a second but as soon as Jinki’s hands were back on him, caressing his buttocks gently, he relaxed immediately and folded his legs up to assist the process.

Tying the ankles together, Jinki managed without much problems, Sangyeon watching carefully from the side, nodding in approval. He was doing good, his touch was gentle, his movements precise, placing the blue rope perfectly.

When it came to connecting the bound limbs, the taller stepped in. They didn’t practice that as it was impossible to do on themselves. Kibum was laying still while Sangyeon’s familiar hands were at work, showing how to tie the hands to the feet with confident moves. He felt the familiar feeling of his shoulders being pulled back when the tallest pulled the rope to connect hands to feet.

Jinki was watching attentively while Sangyeon was at work, feeling more aroused than he thought he would be just from seeing Kibum naked and bound on the bed.

After showing it once, the taller opened it again, telling Jinki to give it a try. The first time took long, but somehow, he managed to do it with the instructions he got from Sangyeon who was watching him closely, assisting the struggling male whenever it was needed.

When he finally succeeded, the taller instructed him to open it and do it again, annoying Jinki for a second before he realized that he should take the other’s advice and learn it properly, so he could do it without supervision.

So, for a second time he took the excess rope he had left over when tying the hands and pulled the rope through the space between Kibum’s legs and then around the rope that tied his feet together. Before he tied the knot, he looked over to Sangyeon who nodded in approval. Connecting the ropes perfectly, he managed to make a perfect cross knot, which finished up the hog-tie.

“Well that was pretty good for a newbie.” Sangyeon said, looking at the beautifully tied up naked male that laid beneath them.

“Are you alright Kibum?” The tallest asked, earning a breathy yes from the raven-haired male.

“So, I guess I will leave you to it now. Come back anytime if you need me.”

With these words, Sangyeon left the room, leaving a fully dressed, very aroused Jinki with his bound, naked boyfriend who was just as aroused as he was.

The first moment the two were alone, Jinki only admired the sight in front of him. The blue rope looked perfect, wrapped around Kibum’s milky skin. The raven’s head was turned to the side to be able to breathe, his eyes closed, waiting for his boyfriend’s touch.

“You look really beautiful like this, you know?” Jinki said, grazing along Kibum’s side with one hand which made the bound male shudder and open his eyes.

“This is so hot.” Kibum said in a breathy voice.

“Yes, it really is.” Jinki’s hands wandered all-over, caressing every bit of the younger’s soft skin, paying special attention to the one spot on his neck where the younger was especially sensitive.

“Please…” Kibum moaned when Jinki’s hands left his body. He needed his boyfriend’s warm hands, now more than ever. With one eye he tried to watch Jinki as he was undressing, but from his position he couldn’t properly make out anything.

Only when Jinki got onto the bed, sitting on the mattress in his naked glory, Kibum finally set his eyes on the gorgeous body his boyfriend had. The older was staring down at his face, while lazily pumping his waking cock. Their eyes met for a second and both felt electricity going through their bodies.

“Turn around” Jinki said, his tone gentle and demanding at the same time.

Kibum tried to follow the order but the restraints made the task harder than it was. He did his best to turn around but whenever he almost succeeded, gravity pulled him back, his face meeting the soft mattress again. He had missed this feeling of being completely helpless, even unable to turn around by himself, and now it was Jinki watching him while he struggled to follow the easiest order. The ropes held his limbs behind his back, making it impossible for him to do what was asked of him. His skin was tingling, knowing he had Jinki’s unshared attention. It was the best feeling in the world, and he didn’t want it to end.

Jinki let him struggle for a while until he finally touched Kibum again, turning him on his side, only to set his eyes on Kibum’s pink manhood which was hanging between his legs, already glistening with a drop of precum. The older couldn’t imagine a more beautiful sight than this. The bound male’s back was arched while his legs and arms were pulled behind his back, leaving his body beautifully stretched for Jinki to take in.

“This was the best idea we ever had” Jinki stated before teasing Kibum’s length by touching its tip with one finger, collecting the drop of precum that had formed. Kibum moaned.

“Thank you.” The younger moaned when Jinki took a hold of his erect manhood, stroking it lazily.

“You are thanking me for this?” Jinki wondered, absolutely horrified how much he liked to hear those words from his boyfriend.

“You make me feel good... -aah…- so I should thank you, shouldn’t I..hh..” Kibum said in between moans, sending more blood right to Jinki’s pulsing penis. By now the younger male was meeting Jinki’s movements halfway, trying his best to move his hips forward despite his bound limbs, trying to get the needed friction.

“Would you stop moving?” the older asked.

“Order me to stop moving.”

Jinki stopped in his movement, had he heard correctly? Judging from the pleading look in Kibum’s eyes, he did hear correctly, and his heart started pumping.

“Stop moving.” Saying those words felt so good and Kibum followed his order instantly, laying completely still, just slightly whimpering in need of Jinki’s touch.

“Well done.” Jinki praised, gaining a moan from the bound male. Being praised by Jinki felt so good he couldn’t hold in the sounds. Kibum had always been vocal in bed but all of this was so highly stimulating he couldn’t hold back – And Jinki did not mind the slightest bit. He loved to hear Kibum’s raspy voice trying to say his name but breaking halfway through when the older’s fingers were caressing the sensitive skin of his testicles.

“There…ahh- There is luuhbe in the chest” Kibum said, pleading the older to slicken his finger while giving him a handjob.

“Oh, you want lube?” Jinki asked, smiling at his immobilised boyfriend teasingly, taking away his hands.

“Yes please.”

“Then you have to earn it.” A smirk played around his lips when he saw Kibum’s eyes widen.

“Where did you learn this?” The younger asked “There is no way you have never done this before.”

Honestly, Jinki had no idea where his sudden confidence came from to say what one dom in a video once said. But in that moment, it just felt right. It felt so good to order Kibum around, even more because he knew that the latter liked being ordered around. He had been hesitant at the beginning but after seeing the raven-haired male’s reaction to his words, he knew that he would be addicted to this feeling soon.

“Did I tell you to speak? Use your mouth for something more important.”

“I love you so much” Kibum almost moaned and then looked over to his boyfriend who was kneeling on the mattress, his manhood surrounded by black pubic hair standing proudly, waiting for Kibum to take care of it.

The bound male did his best to somehow wiggle his way over to where Jinki was, his leaking manhood getting caught between his body and the bed several times, resulting in a pained hiss.

“Colour?” Jinki asked, seeing the discomfort in Kibum’s face.

“Green.” The latter said, now close enough to reach the older’s thighs with his tongue. He was unable to reach the leaking manhood in his position – sitting up was impossible anyway – that was why he simply started licking the rough skin on Jinki’s upper thigh, trying to get as close to the other’s private parts as possible.

The older had originally wanted Kibum to suck him off completely by himself but he soon realised that it was impossible for the bound male to reach his dick without help, and even though he enjoyed the sight of Kibum doing his best while licking his thighs, he really needed the other’s lips around his length. Therefore, he lowered himself, giving Kibum access to his private parts, and the latter instantly closed his lips around the hot length, sucking it in desperately. The warmth of his mouth was amazing, and it needed all of Jinki’s concentration not to start thrusting inside. He loved how eager Kibum was, the latter did barely take time to breathe while sucking Jinki off, loving the feeling of his hot, heavy length on his tongue. Spit was escaping his mouth and whenever he took Jinki a little too deep, or when Jinki couldn’t stop himself from meeting Kibum’s movements with his hips, short gagging noises were heard.

Then suddenly, Jinki pulled away and Kibum, completely out of breath, spit dripping down his chin, looked up at his boyfriend with teary eyes, confused why he had pulled away.

“I said, earn it”

Jinki’s curved Penis was about 10cm away from Kibum’s gaping mouth and the bound male understood instantly, trying to move forward in his restraints. Jinki just watched how Kibum’s muscles flexed while he tried to get his body to move. The raven-haired male really seemed to be familiar with this situation, so he managed to get back to his manhood faster than Jinki thought he would.

But this time, the older decided that he was the one in control, taking a hold of the raven-hair pulling his boyfriend’s head closer, making him take all of his length at once. The first moment, Jinki felt Kibum’s throat contract around him at the sudden intrusion, but just shortly after, the younger had relaxed enough to be able to take him without problem, withstanding the older male’s angry thrusts, wet noises filling the room.

“That’s how you earn it.” Jinki praised, breathing heavily while moving in and out of Kibum’s gaping mouth.

“Yellow” Kibum said when he finally found a moment to breath and speak, and that simple word made Jinki stop in his tracks instantly.

“Oh Gosh, I am so sorry, what did I do wrong?” he said, afraid to have hurt his boyfriend – the one thing he had hoped he would never do.

“It’s not red, dumbass, I just don’t really like people pulling my hair, cannot have bold spots already, can I?” Kibum said in a sassy tone and Jinki relaxed instantly. He should have known. Kibum and his hair.

“Anyways, I guess you have earned your lube.” Jinki said, smiling broadly at his bound boyfriend who looked so incredibly good with his sweaty hair that hung into his face, his swollen lips – not to speak about the blue rope that was tightly wrapped around his wrists.

Jinki stood up, walking over to the chest while Kibum watched him from his rather uncomfortable position on the bed.

“It should be on the right side.” The bound male said, knowing the contents of that chest a little too well.

When Jinki opened it, his eyes grew bigger. He didn’t know most of what was inside, but the things he did know were enough for him to know that he didn’t want to know about any of the rest. He almost didn’t dare to put his hand inside; these objects could have been everywhere.

“They are all clean, don’t worry.” Kibum said from the side, noticing his boyfriend’s hesitation. “Now on the right side there are a few bottles of different flavoured lubes, right next to the condoms. Just bring whatever you like.”

Jinki saw what Kibum was talking about. And there were definitely more than “a few” different bottles of lube not wanting to spend any more time near this chest, he just grabbed the one on the very right, walking back over to the bed after closing the chest again.

“You look like you have seen a ghost” Kibum commented.

“You should not say things like that when you want to be on the receiving end.” Jinki teased, caressing Kibum’s soft hair with one hand, brushing it out of his face to look into his dark eyes.

“Let’s get back to it.”

Jinki helped Kibum to turn back around on his side and then opened the lid of the vanilla flavoured lube he had brought.

“Are you serious? Vanilla?” Kibum said lifting his eyebrows.

“Shut up, I took whatever, not as if it mattered anyway.” The older growled, purring a good amount of the colourless fluid on his hands.

Just minutes after, Kibum was a moaning mess, completely at Jinki’s mercy while the latter’s rough hands were massaging the younger’s rock hard, leaking member. He couldn’t but struggle in his restraints, which looked beautiful in Jinki’s eyes. He knew that Kibum was close when the other started thrusting into his hand, and every time he did, the older removed his hands, making the bound male moan and growl at the loss of touch, thrusting into the air in desperate need of touch.

“Jinki, please.” He said in a raspy voice. “I cannot do this ahhh… much… longahhhhh” While Kibum was complaining, Jinki brought his hands back on his member, stroking it even faster, making it impossible for the younger to finish his sentence.

Kibum had his eyes closed, mouth gaping and was so beautifully moving in his restraints when Jinki finally let him come. The younger trashed around uncontrollably after all this time of stimulation and teasing. Having been on the edge of coming several times made the actual orgasm so much stronger.

Not a single sound was escaping the open mouth while he shot his seeds onto the white sheets of the bed until his body relaxed again, giving his vocal cords enough space to speak one simple word. “Wow”

“I am not done yet.” Jinki said with a smirk, looking at Kibum’s penis which was bright red, glistening with lube and before the younger could ask what the other had in mind, Jinki’s big hands were back on his sensitive member, stroking it gently at first, then picking up the pace.

“FUCK” Kibum screamed, trying to move away from Jinki’s touch. The latter’s rough hand on his sensitive Penis was too much. But the bound male had no chance of getting away as his restraints made it incredibly hard to move away properly. All he could do was roll from side to side, trying to pull his length from Jinki’s hard grip.

The softening member was awaking again, much to Jinki’s pleasure and Kibum’s screams slowly transformed into tired moans. Then suddenly, the older’s hands disappeared and Kibum opened his eyes. Only to see that Jinki had moved over to his backside, hands fumbling with the ropes that held his arms and legs tied together.

Now that Jinki was properly looking at his boyfriend’s wrists, he could make out the red skin under the blue ropes, wanting to get rid of them as fast as possible. And so, he did. With clumsy hands he opened the knots. Some of them were hard to open - due to Kibum struggling they had gotten tighter than they had been at first. But after a few minutes, all the ropes were gone, revealing the sore skin underneath.

“Oh gosh, I am so sorry.” Jinki said, kissing the red skin gently. He had turned the younger around and he was now lying on his back, his dark eyes watching how Jinki caressed every inch of the abused skin with his soft lips. His free hand soon found its way to the older’s hair, gently brushing through it while kisses were placed on his other wrist.

No one said a word, they were simply enjoying each other’s presence. Jinki soon changed to Kibum’s other wrist, then to his ankles. By the time he had finished up kissing the abused skin, he moved up along the younger’s legs, placing more kisses everywhere until he reached the other’s member which was still half-hard.

Kibum had his eyes closed, enjoying the gentle treatment after being bound. His lips were parted slightly, letting out soft moans while Jinki was kissing his length while his hands were massaging his balls softly. Sometimes, Jinki took him inside his mouth, licking the underside of the penis lovingly, then changing it up by taking him deeper, hollowing his cheeks to make more space.

The younger’s hands were gripping on the white sheets, knuckles turning white. Jinki knew exactly where his sensitive spots were, he used a finger to gently caress the skin that connected his testicles and his hot member, making Kibum shudder with every move. How does he deserve a boyfriend like Jinki? One that completely takes care of him, one that knows exactly what he loved, one that sees him as equal despite being submissive, one that accepts all of him.

It wasn’t long until Kibum felt his second orgasm building up. It was as if Jinki’s love was rushing through his veins and his heart was pounding when his balls tightened. Jinki also felt it and removed his mouth from the hot member, pumping it with his hands a few times while the spurts of white shot out of the tip, landing on the big hands and Kibum’s torso.

It took a few minutes for the younger to calm down. He was breathing heavily, and his body was so incredibly tired. His limbs were aching from being in one position for too long, but he couldn’t let Jinki hanging like that. The older’s manhood was still standing proudly against his stomach.

“Let me…” Kibum started in a raspy voice, trying to get up to crawl over to Jinki’s warmth.

“Shhh.” The older said, moving closer to press his lips on Kibum’s, his body towering over his. “Today was for you, I can take care of myself.”

“Don’t always take yourself back.” Kibum said, eyes half lidded while he looked up into Jinki’s eyes who were just inches away. His vision was blurry, but he could easily see the older’s warm smile.

“I want to, and you cannot keep me from doing what I want now. The scene is over” the raven-haired male added, his hand traveling along Jinki’s side, down to his leaking member. As soon as his hand touched the hot organ, he knew that the other wouldn’t last long anyway. By now Jinki wasn’t protesting anymore, enjoying Kibum’s touch as much as always.

The older held himself up with his arms that were placed next to Kibum’s head and his knees that were placed on each side of the younger’s hips while the latter’s hands were working on the erect penis between their sweaty bodies. Kibum’s eyes never left Jinki’s while he moved his hands slowly, using the excess lube from his own cock to glide along the soft skin more smoothly.

Just before Jinki came, his elbows gave in and he buried his head in the crook of Kibum’s neck, breathing in his boyfriend’s wonderful scent. The younger smiled when his nose nuzzled into Jinki’s hair and then sped up his movements, getting the older over the edge with a small hiss against his neck. While Jinki was riding out his orgasm, he sucked on Kibum’s neck gently, wanting to create a mark, a mark that this man was only his. A mark of his love.

Both were still panting when Jinki moved off of Kibum’s body, lying next to him. They were looking at the high ceiling that had several hooks attached to it, while catching their breath. Somehow, Jinki’s hand found Kibum’s and their fingers intertwined, the older’s thumb caressing the other’s hand’s upper side.

The next time Jinki turned around to look at Kibum, he saw tears glistening in his boyfriend’s eyes.

“Oh god, why are you crying?” Jinki said, almost panicking, turning to his side to brush away the tear that had just escaped Kibum’s eye.

“Nothing, I am just so happy to have you.” The younger said, also turning to his side, smiling at his boyfriend with loving eyes. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but whatever it is, I am glad I did it.”

“I love you so much.” Jinki said, smiling right back.

“I guess I should thank Sangyeon for taking you to the club back then.”

“How about you send him a gift basket then?” Jinki joked earning a giggle from Kibum.

“Oh, you wouldn’t like the contents of that gift basket. Believe me.” The raven-haired male said with a smirk.

“I am changing my opinion; I don’t think I like you that much anymore.” Jinki said, earning a loving punch in the shoulder.

“You are just jealous. But if I am honest, to hear that you have sucked him off in a bathroom made me slightly jealous as well. You were never that kinky when you were with me.”

“Says the one I have tied up only an hour ago. And I noticed. You are cute when you are jealous.”

“Shut up. Let’s stay the night.” Kibum then said, looking into Jinki’s dark eyes.

“Will that be alright?”

“Do you really think I would get the room for only a few hours? I thought you knew me.”

“I will never know all of you. But I will do my best to come as close to "all" as I can get.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> Yey, That's it. I hope it was worth the wait. Maybe not... idk.  
> Now you can get ready for more 2min in the following chapter. I hope you are looking forward to that.
> 
> This author note is short because I said everything in the beginning of the chapter XD
> 
> I'll just wish you a great day and leave comments if you want, I would love to get some feedback on this.
> 
> XX
> 
> R


	16. A Really, Really, Just Incredibly, Ugly Jacket

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY SHINee DAY EVERYONE!!!!! NOTE THAT THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE! (chapter 16 and 17 are new)
> 
> I am updating to celebrate their 12th anniversary and I hope y'all can spend a great day and get blessed with much SHINee fanwork (art, fics, edits, covers idk what else but WHATEVER)   
> As for me, My Instagram and Twitter is filled with amazing artwork and I couldn't be happier. I would pay to get this much SHINee content EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR.
> 
> So yeah. To put a little more SHINee content out there, here are the new chapters! hope y'all like it <3 this one's a long ass one too.

After his talk with Jinki, Kibum knew he needed to speak to Taemin as soon as he could and ditched his Sunday group-project study-session for once to wait for the younger to wake up. It was already 11am when Kibum, who had started doing some overdue uni work, heard his friend get up. The breakfast he had prepared was long cold, so he stood up to heat it up when Taemin entered the small kitchen.

“Kim? What are you still doing here? Are you sick?” the long-haired male mumbled in a sleepy voice, his hair one big mess as he had just gotten up. It has been a while since Kibum had last seen Taemin like this, completely natural, no makeup, no hairdo, no nice clothes, just a boy that had just gotten up, only wearing his pyjamas. If he hadn’t had a serious thing to discuss, he would have even enjoyed seeing Taemin like this for once. Just as the person he was, not as the person he gave himself as.

“I made you breakfast” he said, turning on the stove. “I’ll heat it up, go and take a shower.”

“What is going on Kibum?” Taemin was slowly waking up, visibly confused that his friend was making breakfast for him when they usually ate breakfast alone.

“Just do what I say, now go!” the older almost ordered and Taemin couldn’t but follow it. Kibum was stubborn and he knew that he would not get any answers until he had showered.

Only shortly later, the two of them, Taemin now with dripping wet hair, were sitting at their small table, Taemin eating the food Kibum had made with delight.

“Not that I mind, but why are you home? Don’t you have group projects on Sundays?” Taemin asked when his plate was almost empty.

“I needed to talk to you.” Taemin raised an eyebrow but Kibum kept speaking. “you said those wrist marks are from Minho, in your words 'BDSM-marks' the thing is, I have spent a long time in the BDSM-scene to know that those aren’t simple cuff marks you get from a good dominant.”

Taemin swallowed hard. Couldn’t one thing just work out the way he wanted it too? It was as if he was constantly followed by bad luck. Kibum familiar with the BDSM scene? He couldn’t say he was surprised but at the same time he felt strange that he didn’t know about it. 

“You have been into BDSM? Why don’t I know of it?” Taemin tried to change the direction of the talk.

“We have never spoken about our lives prior to the club… I have guessed it is what you want… that is why I have never told you. The story isn’t very interesting actually and I don’t mind talking about it. Ever since I was in high school I was really interested in everything related to BDSM, and was sexually active at a pretty young age, simply because I liked it - ever since I first experienced it. Hence, I came across a BDSM-club which paired me up with a fitting partner. I was with several doms over the years, some for a longer, some shorter period, and somehow my parents came across my sexual interests. They pretty much threw me out on the street when they did. It is not a nice story to tell, but through my dom at that time, I was introduced to Jonghyun and the club where I started dancing not long after – and that is when we met. Back then, I still lived with Sangyeon, that was my dom’s name, I only moved out of his apartment when you and I moved in together. That was also the day we finished our relationship because it got too hard to see each other on a regular basis.”

Taemin wasn’t exactly surprised since he could see Kibum in a BDSM-club anytime, but still, to hear about Kibum’s past and how his parents threw him out, made him see his friend from a whole other perspective. The reason why they have never really talked about their pasts was probably Taemin’s issues with his own. He had never been proud of what his life was before he started his work as a dancer.

Now that Kibum was talking about his, did he have to tell him about how he was handed from one foster family to another until he finally walked away and sold his youthful body to strangers? He had no idea if he could bring it up.

“Oh, I see…” Taemin said, appreciating how Kibum opened up to him, unsure if he would ever be able to do so.

“Now, you see, I know how BDSM bruises should look like. And those” Kibum took Taemin’s hand, moving back the long sleeve of the striped shirt. “Those are struggle marks of someone who didn’t want to be bound, someone fighting against the restraints. You can’t blame me for worrying about you when your wrists look like this. Seriously. What is Minho doing to you? I didn’t think he would be capable of doing things like this, but I will cut his precious testicles off, if this is his doing.”

Taemin’s heart sunk. The explanation that it was Minho had been reasonable as long as it meant it was consensual. He hadn’t thought that Kibum could distinguish between rape and regular cuff marks. Now that he identified them as the former, Taemin knew that he couldn’t keep up his story. Even though didn’t particularly like the tall male, he definitely didn’t want him to be pulled into this, even less when Kibum suspected Minho to have raped him.

“Why are you not answering? I am serious about this. If Minho did this to you, I will not stand by and watch. I will call the police on him and have him rot in a prison.” Kibum said while Taemin was thinking of a way to keep Minho out of this without revealing what he was doing on Thursday nights. He couldn’t let Minho be called a rapist, that would have been unfair to the man who had only been nice to him, but his troubled mind could not come up with anything this fast, he simply mumbled:

“It’s not Minho…”

“So, who the heck did this to you?!?” Kibum was raging.

“It’s complicated, Kibum just let it be. I have it under control.” Taemin said, slightly intimidated by the older male whose eyes were staring him down as the raven-haired had stood up in his anger.

“You call this you have it under control?!” He shouted, pointing at Taemin’s wrists. “You were fucking raped, that is not having it under control!!!”

Kibum’s words hit so close to home that Taemin couldn’t stop the tears forming in his eyes. Of course, he didn’t have his life under control, but he no one but him could say it.

“Why do you shout at me like this? Can’t you just trust me?” Taemin said, voice raspy from suppressing tears.

“Because I care about you. I do trust you, but I know what I see and I know that you are lying to me.” Kibum said, his voice getting softer when he saw the glossy eyes of his best friend staring back at him.

That moment, Taemin broke. His will to hide everything broke, he needed something to hold onto while tears started to run down his face. The things that came out of his mind and wanted to surface, wanted to be said out loud were so mentally painful he felt his own body tense up as he said the first word.

“Sorry.”

Even though Kibum had known that something must be incredibly off, he didn’t expect his usually strong friend to break down like this. He had only said one word but already looked as if he was tortured from the inside out. Never before had he seen him like this. There had been bad days while they lived together but never like this. Taemin never cried like this.

Kibum tried to reach for his hand but Taemin pulled it away as soon as he felt the other’s touch. The sobs were dying down slowly, but he had just started.

“It was just such an easy way – I just tend to go back to what I know and do best.” He said, not specifying anything because his mind was absorbed in thoughts and he couldn’t make connections or talk about it in a proper order. He wasn’t talking to Kibum. He was talking to himself.

“What was an easy way Lee Taemin?” Kibum's voice was serious as he asked the question even though he knew the answer. He hadn’t lost hope that it could be something else entirely. But it was exactly what he had hoped it not to be.

“Are you serious Kibum, you know exactly what I mean. You caught me doing it. Do you really want me to say it out loud?” Taemin’s voice was filled with pain while he finally raised his eyes to look into Kibum’s. It was hard for the friend to not look away. The despair in Taemin’s eyes was so visible he worried there might be more to this story than what he had figured.

Taemin’s throat was closed, he couldn’t speak anymore. It gave Kibum a moment to think. He made the connection easily. Why hadn’t he noticed before? After all he did catch Taemin sleeping with two men for money within the first two weeks he was working at the club. It never happened again afterwards so Kibum though it had been an exception. He didn’t know Taemin very well back then so he never asked about it, guessing that he was somehow familiar with the men or just did it because of a desperate situation.

“I had hoped that those two times were exceptions” the older stated, his face sinking in sadness. He remembered the night a few months ago when Taemin had almost been raped at the club during a private dance. There was a safety system that alerted the whole backstage area when a dancer pressed the button underneath the table. He remembered how he rushed into the room, seeing Taemin pressed with his face on the table, the man about to pull down his friend’s already short pants. After he had broken them apart, the man had even offered money if he let him continue. Kibum had observed Taemin right that moment. The latter didn’t look too bothered by the whole situation. Looking back, he should have been more suspicious.

Mistaking sadness for disappointment in his best friend’s eyes, Taemin’s heart sunk even deeper, he didn’t have anything to lose anymore, so why should he keep things a secret when Kibum hated him already? He was angry at Kibum for asking, He was angry at the world for never giving him a break, but most of all he hated himself. He hated that he had let it come this far. In the end it was himself who destroyed their friendship. The anger and the hatred made his whole attitude shift.

“Believe me, those two times weren’t exceptions. Yes, they were the only ones after I joined the club, but I have lived from the money my body made since I was 16.”

“You what?” Kibum whispered, his eyes tearing up, but Taemin just brushed it off and continued to speak.

“I was pushed from foster family to foster family but as you can guess, nothing really worked out, so I ran away. You know, it is pretty easy to get into prostitution. All it needs is a group of men giving you compliments for your looks. If you have never gotten any in your life before, you will do whatever they want you to do, even more if they give you money to keep you from starving. So yeah it wasn’t long until I found a place to stay and got hired by a good brothel where I worked for a few years.”

While Taemin was telling his story ever so nonchalantly, Kibum’s façade crumbled more and more. He only knew about Taemin selling his body twice when they were working at the club together. In no way did he imagine that Taemin had worked in a brothel, getting fucked by countless men who left nothing but a few bills.

The younger male wasn’t even crying anymore and that was what worried Kibum the most. He talked about it as if he didn’t care after breaking down just minutes prior.

“You probably don’t want to know this, but that’s how Jonghyun found me.” Taemin said, chuckling a little before tears started clouding his vision again. He was not crying because of traumatic experiences but because of the look on his best friend’s face. He knew that their friendship would never be the same again, he expected it to be no more as soon as he walked out of that door. Kibum was obviously disgusted to have a friend like him, one that had sold his body countless times. After all, he was nothing but a dirty prostitute.

Taemin was embarrassed. He had no idea how he could face Kibum in the future, if he ever could face him again.

It might have been childish, but as soon as Kibum started speaking after a long silence, he knew that he couldn’t stay. Shaking off Kibum’s hands who tried to hold him back by his arm, Taemin stormed outside, nothing with him, barely putting on his shoes, just wearing his jeans and a shirt, hair still dripping wet, whipping his face every time his feet met the ground as he ran out of their apartment building.

He had nowhere to go, so after minutes of running through the streets, he got tired and took a break in a small ally, catching his breath. Realizing what he had just done, he buried his face in his hands. Why did he have to run away, that would just make everything even worse. He found himself wishing that he had stayed, admitting to working at Erotes, explaining that it was only a contract of ten nights and would be over soon. Maybe that way, Kibum could have understood? Maybe that way he could be forgiven?

But, of course, he had to run away from his problems, ending up alone in this ally with nothing but the clothes he wore that weren't appropriate for the freezing temperatures of January. Could it be that he left his phone in his pants last night? A flash of hope shot through the long-haired male and his hand looked for his phone in his back pocket, where he luckily found it.

Taemin let out a deep sigh when he felt the device under the fabric of his jeans, fishing for it eagerly. But who would he call? He couldn’t call back Kibum who had tried to reach him several times in the last twenty minutes. The first person to come to his mind was Gyutae, but that thought, he buried instantly. He was supposed to be the older one, the one Gyutae could rely on, it was impossible for him to look for support in the younger. The latter had enough problems as it was, and he didn’t need a Hyung who couldn’t take care of himself.

Other than him he barely had friends, and not a single one who knew about his second job. While beating his brain for someone to call, Minho popped up several times but Taemin shoved this idea to the back of his mind every time. He couldn’t call Minho, could he?

He had to decide fast, the cold air was making him shiver allover and he came to the conclusion that Minho, indeed, was his only option. His heart was still beating fast when he looked for Minho’s contact and pressed the button to start the call. At this point nothing really mattered anymore. He just didn’t want to be alone. He didn’t want to be surrounded by the cold anymore. And Minho felt safe. Every time Taemin met the older male, he felt safe. There was a certain warmth radiating from Minho that Taemin couldn’t find in anyone else’s presence. Not even Kibum’s.

When the call went through and Taemin heard Minho’s voice on the other end of the line, he let out a deep breath – only now realizing that he had held it in while the connection was building.

“Taemin? What’s up? Any trouble?”

“Could you pick me up?” Taemin said in a raspy voice.

“Are you alright?” Minho asked, slightly worried.

“Yes, but could you please get me.”

“Uhm… sure… where are you?”

Taemin looked around. He didn’t quite know where he ended up and tried to remember if he had seen any place he was familiar with close to the ally he was in right now. He walked out onto the street that was filled with signs of numerous shops that tried to attract customers.

“Taemin? Are you still there? I am getting in my car now. Where are you?” Minho asked after a few seconds of silence

“Wait, I see a subway station” Taemin said, walking faster when he saw the familiar sign of an entrance to a subway station.

“Sadang station. I am right next to exit 14”

“Stay there, I will get you.” With those words, the call disconnected.

Right next to exit 14 there was a small place with benches and trees, also including a public toilet. Sitting down on one of the benches, Taemin started to calm down. The fresh air helped his mind to settle- the cold he barely felt anymore as his body was mostly numb. There was nothing he could change now. Kibum knew.

The long-haired male sat there, alone, waiting for Minho to turn up. He couldn’t go home, that was the one thing he knew. Kibum would be waiting there and he had no idea how he could face the older at the moment. He needed some time apart, settling his thoughts.

There was a big street that went past the place where Taemin was seated and the sound of the cars was constant and persistent while there was a slight breeze that made the long-haired male cross his arms to warm his body at least a little. Now that he was sitting there, watching people in their coats walk by, he felt the cold wind caressing his skin as it made its way past his shirt even more intensely.

By the time Minho was able to park his car somewhere close to exit 14, Taemin was tremblin, hugging his barely covered body. When Minho saw him, his pace instantly sped up and the taller was almost running towards the shivering male.

“What the heck are you wearing?!” He shouted as he was getting closer, Taemin looking up, happier to see the taller male than he had ever been before.

“Took you long enough” He mumbled when he felt Minho’s warm hands under his arms, pulling him up to hurry into the warmth of Minho’s car.

“You are freezing.” Minho stated the obvious when he turned on the motor to heat the seats of the black car. “Why did you not wear a coat?”

“I sort of ran away from home – no time to grab a coat…” Taemin said after a short silence while he felt the back of his sear heat up slowly. “Before you ask, I don’t really know why I ran away, it was stupid so fucking stupid. But after Kibum found out about me selling my body, my mind just went blank.” He sighed.

“You don’t have to put it like that…” Minho said, uncomfortable with the trivial way Taemin spoke about being paid for sexual intercourse.

“Well, it is the truth, isn’t it?” Minho nodded, a little unsure and Taemin continued: “I am working as a prostitute and denying it will not do any good.”

“But why don’t you just go back… - Why call me of all people?” the taller said and drove onto the busy street.

“Just drive.”

“Where to?”

“I don’t care. Just somewhere”

“You know, you never asked if I actually had time to spend with you. For all you know I could be busy today.” Minho mentioned.

“You COULD be busy, but you are here, so you are not. Now take me away from here boy. I need to clear my mind.”

Every try from Minho to start a conversation was ignored by the long-haired male who absentmindedly looked out of the window, watching the buildings pass by. But it seemed that they were driving out of the city, the buildings got smaller and at one point, there were less buildings around in general.

“Where are you taking me?” Taemin then asked, noticing that they had left Seoul a while ago.

“You’ll see.” Minho just said. Concentrating on driving.

It was about an hour later when Minho turned off the motor of his car, parking it on an almost empty parking lot that had a beautiful view onto the wild waves of the ocean.

The last 15 minutes of their drive, after the sea had first come into Taemin’s vision, the latter had been sitting on his warm seat almost unmoving, staring outside as if he had never seen it before. Minho had thrown a few looks to his side, amused at Taemin’s hungry eyes that took in as much of the view as possible.

Now as they have arrived though, Taemin just kept staring outside, making no move of getting out of the car.

“You’re not getting out?” Minho asked, a little too happy with Taemin’s reaction, he had been to this place several times before. Back when his family was still alive, they went there almost every summer to spend a week by the sea.

It wasn’t an interesting place. Most people living there were old and working on fishing boats, trying to support their families. But Minho had only good memories connected to this place and the Halmoni whose place they used to stay at.

Minho didn’t quite know why he took Taemin to a place that was so dear to him, but he had missed the breeze by the sea, and he felt that it would be the perfect place for Taemin to sort his thoughts. He knew that the dancer was confused. It was pretty obvious because the way he spoke wasn’t fitting the situation at all.

When Taemin didn’t answer, he asked again: “You don’t want to go outside?”

“I am only wearing a shirt; how can I go out into the freezing wind? I don’t want to almost freeze to death twice a day boy.” The long-haired male said in a teasing tone, making Minho frown. Why was Taemin so calm? But he had to admit that he didn’t think about that.

“Well we cannot just stay inside the car, now that we came this far.” Minho said, opening the door. “I will see if I have something in the trunk.” Now alone, he was able to decide how he would treat Taemin in this strange situation. Asking him about what happened probably wasn’t the best option. Maybe he was protecting himself by acting as he usually did. Minho had done something similar to cope with the death of his family. Just that acting like he used to wasn’t good enough. He had to go to the extremes to prove how he wasn’t affected. That he still could live his life partying as if nothing ever happened. So, Minho decided to play along.

While Minho was busy searching the mess in his trunk for something Taemin could wear, Taemin was staring out at the sea.

He had never seen the ocean in real life. There had never been an opportunity for him to see it. It looked scary, scary and dark - scary but interesting and in its own way incredibly beautiful and mesmerising.

“UFH” Minho let himself fall onto the seat behind the wheel, pulling Taemin out of his thoughts that had wandered away, following the movements of the waves.

“I guess I will have to go and buy you something, there is only a blanket in there, and I don’t think you would want to walk around in a really big, bright red blanket.” Minho started the motor again, ready to drive off.

“Oh, that is fine, I don’t mind, really.”

“That blanket is about three times your size, I don’t want you tripping over it. I’ll just get you a coat.”

“Minho, I don’t need another coat, plus I don’t really have any money on me, so the blanket will do.”

Minho did not answer until Taemin insisted a second time. “Yah, Minho. I am serious, stop that car.”

“Can you just shut up and take a little kindness for once. I really don’t care about the money; I will buy you a coat. End of discussion.” Taemin was surprised at Minho’s strong reaction and stayed quiet while they took a halt in front of a small place, apparently the only clothing store this village had.

“How convenient that you cannot drive.” Minho mumbled, getting out of the car and locking the door behind him. He simply ignored Taemin who started cursing at him the moment he heard the doors lock. With a smirk, the taller walked away, turning around twice to see a furious Taemin showing him the finger. The younger was really cute when he was angry, Minho decided and waved back at him.

The store offered exactly two different options: There was a long down jacket and a short down jacket, both looked like trash-bags and were of an ugly orange colour. Minho sighed. He had hoped that he would at least find something Taemin would wear later on as well. After all it was the first time he bought something for the younger – and judging from the younger’s words, Minho guessed it would also be the only time he would find a good enough reason to treat the younger to something.

With a long face, Minho walked back to the car, a big black bag with the long version of the coat inside in his hand – Taemin wouldn’t be wearing this jacket in the future anyway, so he should at least be warm for today. To his surprise he saw Taemin with his head leaned back and eyes closed. It couldn’t be that he was sleeping, could it? He hadn’t been gone that long.

“Fuck you” Taemin said as soon as he heard the door open. “How can you just lock me in here?!? Are you out of your mind?!” he shouted at the taller who threw the bag in his face. “YAH!!”

“Sometimes one's gotta force someone to their happiness. So, shut up and take the gift.”

“You are awful, you know that?” Taemin said, taking the bag anyway.

“I know that.”

“Oh, this is just great.” Taemin moaned ironically, pulling the ugliest jacket he had ever seen in his life out of the black bag.

“What do you call this Minho?”

“Uhm…” Minho started, blushing. “A really, really, just incredibly, ugly jacket that should only be worn by people 70+.”

“At least you know it.” Taemin mumbled, eyeing the orange trash-bag with disgust. “I will not wear this. But thanks for the gift I guess…”

“I bet you would look amazing. You could be a trend-setter, you know? Maybe this will be the newest shit in a few months” Minho said and at that moment spotted an old couple a little further up the street wearing the exact same jacket he had just bought.

“Oh uhm…” he said, hoping Taemin hadn’t seen them yet, starting the motor. “Or maybe not...”

That moment, Taemin started laughing, surprising the taller who was blushing again – Taemin’s laugh was beautiful.

“Are you sure?” the long-haired male was pointing at the couple who was walking along the street slowly, hand in hand.

“If you don’t shut up I will turn around and buy another one and you have to walk around with me like that.” Minho said, not thinking much and only realising what he had said after a few seconds when Taemin didn’t reply.

“I, Uhm…”

“You didn’t mean it?” Taemin guessed and Minho nodded.

“Why do I have the feeling that you would love walking around with me while wearing this ugly ass jacket?” The older blushed once again, trying to focus on the road.

“Shut up, I am driving.”

Taemin did not bring it up again. And rather than looking outside while they drove out of the village, he caught himself watching Minho through the rear-view mirror several times. Why? He didn’t really know. He had always known that the taller was handsome, but he had never looked at him long enough to notice the gentle eyes that were watching the street.

“Wait here I will just get us something to eat” Minho said, pulling Taemin out of his thought once again. And before the latter could say anything, Minho was already out, jogging over to a small stand which was aglow in a hazy cloud of steam due to the cold.

It wasn’t long until they made a halt at the same spot they were parked before.

“Let’s go for a walk.” Minho said, putting on his coat again, taking the backpack off the backseat.

“So, you really want me to put on that jacket?” Taemin groaned. “Can’t I just get the blanket?”

“I’ll take it along, don’t worry, now don’t be an ungrateful brat and just wear it – There is barely anyone around anyway.”

While Minho was trying to fit the big blanket into his backpack – which he succeeded in, Taemin put on the orange down jacket, with disgust at first but as soon as he felt it heat up, he didn’t care about the looks of it anymore. The freezing wind was passing by him, not bothering him anymore. It felt safe and warm, something he hadn’t felt in quite a while.

Soon, they were walking side by side along the seashore with the wind blowing freezing air into their faces. The sand was cold and wet but neither of them really cared as their footsteps disappeared behind them. It wasn’t long until their noses were red, and their eyes filled with tears due to the freezing temperatures. There weren’t many words spoken, occasionally, one of them brought up how cold it was but other than that they just kept walking until they came to a place that was completely hidden from the highway they had followed to get here.

The sand had become bigger stones and was now almost human sized rocks that broke the waves, making salty water splash through the freezing air. A little further away from the cold wet, they found a flat rock which seemed perfect to take a break.

“How about we eat something over there?” Taemin suggested.

Shortly, Minho had unpacked the big red blanket and the food which had gotten cold during the last 15 minutes. When the older had finished spreading the blanket, he gestured Taemin to take a seat on it.

“You take a seat first; I have this beautiful jacket to keep me warm.” The long-haired male said, pointing down at the orange abomination of a jacket.

“But…” Minho tried to argue, but the younger had already pushed him onto the blanket and put both loose sides over Minho’s cold body. The older might be dressed more elegantly but he was obviously cold.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice your shivers and how you were rubbing your hands while we were walking.”

“You know, you sound like you care about me in a roma…” Minho started but was interrupted by Taemin – again.

“Shut it. You better not say it.”

“Could you please stop interrupting me when I am speaking?” Minho whined while Taemin sat down next to him, leaving enough space between them to surely not have any body contact with the taller.

“Could you stop pretending we are a couple?”

“Why?”

Taemin stayed quiet for a moment. Why did he not like Minho speaking about them as if they were dating?

“Just. It makes me uncomfortable.”

“I like making you uncomfortable.” Minho said with a smirk on his face, wrapping the blanket closer around his tall frame

“Shut up and give me the food, I am starving.”

While they were eating, a comfortable conversation established – it was mostly Minho speaking about his friendship with Jinki which then turned into him telling Taemin about the time when he was the “straightest guy on earth” and how the younger was the one to change his view on sexuality un general. Hearing Minho talk about it this way, made Taemin just slightly proud – but whenever the conversation went to the wrong direction, which meant everything including Taemin’s second job that wasn't about Gyutae, a strange feeling arose.

“let’s just not talk about that…” Taemin mumbled.

“I thought you weren’t ashamed of it… you yourself talk about it as if it is nothing.”

“Do you really think that one can be not ashamed of a job like that? I mean boy, in what world do you live? Of course, I am. Yes, I can talk about it, but that doesn’t mean that I am alright with selling my body at all. It simply means that I have accepted how my life is going. As much as I dislike it, this job got me off the streets years ago and has made it possible for me to find the job at the club, which is – by the way – way less sexual than you think.”

Minho didn’t look very convinced, but he didn’t say anything.

“You are sure that you cannot quit before the 10 nights are over?” Minho said after a long silence as they were both watching the movement of the waves.

“Yes, I am. Plus I can see the end, it is just four more nights, so I’ll be fine.”

“You are a very fascinating person, you know that?” Minho said, now watching the younger from the side – watching how his long hair moved in the wind while Taemin was watching the horizon.

Flabbergasted by Minho’s sudden confession, he turned around, his eyes meeting the taller’s big ones. After a fleeting moment of eye contact, Taemin hit Minho’s shoulder, cursing at him once again. He ended up pulling the blanket off the other’s body, making him yelp in surprise at the sudden cold air.

“Give back that blanket.” Minho growled, trying to snatch it back, but Taemin was faster, jumping off the rock to flee the place while carefully watching his step on the stones around him.

Of course, Minho followed him right away, running after the smaller male who almost made it to the sandy part of the beach again. On the stones the taller had been disadvantaged due to his balance problems, but as soon as he was on flat ground it only took Minho seconds to catch up with the dancer. When he finally caught him, he threw his arms around the other’s smaller body, holding Taemin in a close embrace while trying to take the blanket out of his hands.

It wasn’t long until Minho succeeded, throwing his arms in the air in a triumphant scream. They only realised now that they had been laughing wholeheartedly the whole time. A few subtle chuckles marked the end of the fun and their eyes met again.

Somehow neither of them found it necessary to talk about what had just happened and they returned to their original spot without exchanging any words.

“Do you need to get home at some point?” Taemin spoke into the silence that had surrounded them.

“Not really… you?”

“Nah…”

This was followed by another minute of silence while Minho wrapped the blanket around him again as the wind had started blowing stronger.

“Uhm…” Taemin said, making Minho turn his head. “Could I maybe get a bit of that blanket anyway?” The long-haired male hated to ask, but he had to admit that even this ugly ass jacket was unable to protect him from this freezing wind that had made its way underneath the orange fabric. He couldn’t afford being sick and he had sat in the cold today once already, another time could mean the difference between sick and a small cold.

A satisfied look spread on Minho’s face, as if he had been waiting for Taemin to ask and held up one side of the blanket.

“Suit yourself.”

The first moment was awkward, Taemin didn’t want to touch Minho’s body with his own but the taller got closer the moment he sat down next to him, placing the blanket over him almost lovingly.

“Don’t” Taemin said when he did so.

“What?”

“Just don’t treat me like I am some kind of flower. I hate that.” Even though the taller was slightly taken aback, he tried not to let it show.

“I am not treating you like a flower. Even if you are as pretty as one.”

“You know, I am really sick of hearing things like that. I am a man just like you, so shut up. I am only underneath this blanket because I don’t want to get sick.”

“Oh really? If that was the case, you could have just asked me to take you back home. It is almost dinner time anyway. Won’t you be missed?”

“Ah fuck off.” Taemin groaned, getting up.

“See, how you act is very suspicious.”

Taemin didn’t answer but sat back down as Minho’s body warmth had just spread underneath the blanket and the long-haired male couldn’t wait to feel it again.

Sharing their warmth, their shoulders just brushing slightly, they stayed seated for a while until Minho brought up the question of what to do next.

“Should we go back?” he asked as the sun had set not long ago.

“I don’t think I can go home tonight.” Taemin answered.

“So, what are you planning to do?”

“Maybe I’ll ask Gyutae if I can stay at his place.”

“Didn’t you say he lived in Goshiwon earlier?” Minho’s brows shot up. “You’ll hardly have any space to sleep there. I know a place around here where we could stay if you are fine with that.” He then suggested, and to his surprise, the younger didn’t accuse him of wanting to get into his pants.

“It sounds better than going home.”

“But you know that at some point you’ll have to talk to Kibum again? You cannot run from him forever” the older added while packing the blanket back into his backpack.

“Of course, I know. But it is not going to be tonight.”

Half an hour later, they were standing in front of a traditional house which was surrounded by smoke, coming from the fire that was burning in its middle. An elderly woman opened the small door, her eyes doubling in size when she saw Minho.

“The world is playing games with my eyes – is it really you?” she spoke in a rough but very warm voice.

“It’s me. In flesh and bones.” Minho said, looking down as he was ashamed he hadn’t visited this place ever since his family had gotten into the car accident.

“Let me look at you my dear.” She said, opening the door completely, reaching for Minho’s face with her old hands. The woman just barely reached high enough.

“You have gotten so handsome. Come in, come in. It is freezing outside! I will make you a bowl of soup.”

The two followed the old woman inside, it was in fact much warmer inside the wooden house than Taemin had expected.

“Who’s this beautiful lady? Is she your girlfriend?” she asked while entering the kitchen. Despite it being a traditional, old house, the kitchen was a modern one, somehow not fitting the whole concept of the old wooden building.

“Excuse me, uhm halmoni, but I am a man.” Taemin then spoke in a deep voice, surprising the old woman.

“Oh, well then, I guess I should really start wearing my glasses then. But you are a very pretty one anyway.” She didn’t spare the two men another look and started heating up the pan that had been left on the stove. “What are you here for anyway?” She then asked while stirring the soup.

“We wanted to ask if it is possible to stay here for a night. My friend here, Taemin, had wanted to take a trip to the beach, as he had never seen it before, and we got carried away and it is too late to drive back to Seoul now.” Minho explained, leaving out any details about the real reason they were here.

“Oh honey, sure you can. I guess the room your parents stayed in back then should be clean enough. Yours’s and your sister's room is completely filled with things I need to throw away… I didn’t expect any visitors anytime soon.”

“Thank you.” Minho said.

“What are you waiting for?” The Halmoni said when neither Taemin nor Minho moved. “Minho-ya go and show your friend around – he can put his things in the room already. I will finish up the soup while you do so.”

Minho then briefly showed Taemin where everything was, then put his backpack on the floor of the room they would be staying in for the night. It wasn’t big and there wasn’t even a bed, just thick blankets and cushions to sleep on, plus another set of blankets to keep them warm. The walls were made out of wood and fabric which let the light from the outside in. On a few wooden shelves, Taemin spotted pictures of several people, as well as many books.

When they came back to the kitchen, the table was already set, and they were presented with one of the best Jjamppong Taemin had ever tasted in his life – Halmoni claimed it was because of the fresh seafood she used.

It turned out, that she used to work at Minho’s grandparent’s company and then somehow became a caretaker of Minho and his sister while their parents were working She went back to her hometown when the siblings got old enough to take care of themselves. From then on, the family just visited her at least once year.

Taemin didn’t join the conversation much, he mostly listened as Minho and Halmoni were talking about the past. All this time there was an uncomfortable feeling but Taemin couldn’t quite grasp it.

“Alright boys, this old lady will have to go to sleep – and you two look like you need some as well.”

Of course, Halmoni was right and after taking care of everything in the kitchen, she sent them to their room where they lay on the floor, cuddled up, each in their own blankets, just minutes later. The room was dark and there were barely any sounds to be heard – something that was complete new-land for someone who grew up in a city. Just occasionally there was the sound of a passing car in the distance. The only thing to be heard the wind which played with the roof. It was peaceful.

“Minho? Are you still awake?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> There is ALOT of 2min progress here - So I hope you guys are happy. If you are please let me know heheheh comments are very very appreciated.
> 
> Wordcount: Way to much (7330)
> 
> XX
> 
> R


	17. I Really Don't Want To Hold Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY SHINee DAY EVERYONE!!!!! NOTE THAT THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE! (chapter 16 and 17 are new)
> 
> I am updating to celebrate their 12th anniversary and I hope y'all can spend a great day and get blessed with much SHINee fanwork (art, fics, edits, covers idk what else but WHATEVER)  
>  As for me, My Instagram and Twitter is filled with amazing artwork and I couldn't be happier. I would pay to get this much SHINee content EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR.
> 
> So yeah. To put a little more SHINee content out there, here is the second new chapter! hope y'all like it <3   
> Yes I copy pasted this note. fight me.

The morning after was quiet. None of them talked much and Halmoni was out of house, getting new wood for the fireplace. They hadn’t been able to sleep much after Taemin had asked Minho about his parents.

“What about your parents?” Taemin asked into the dark room.

“What about them?” Minho asked back after a few seconds of silence.

“Halmoni and you talked about them as if they passed away. What happened?”

“Uhm…” Minho struggled to find words. He hadn’t brought up the death of his family to many people. Just Jinki, a few other family friends that he didn’t keep in touch with anymore, and whoever belonged to immediate family knew. He had never talked about the accident to an outsider.

“Did I overstep a boundary? I am sorry for asking, you don’t need to tell me.” Taemin said when the taller did not continue.

“No, it is fine… I know so much about you…” Minho took a deep breath. “It happened almost three years ago.”

With many breaks, Minho told Taemin about the worst day of his life and how it had developed ever since, how he got less interested in his studies and did nothing much besides getting drunk, taking minor drugs and sleeping with women. He wasn’t exactly proud of his lifestyle, but also explained that it had been the only way for him to cope with everything that happened.

Especially when telling about the car accident, Minho was glad that the younger could not see his face, as tears were forming in his eyes. He had cried about his family many times, but always in closed spaces, other than Jinki no one had seen him cry before.

After their conversation - which continued for almost an hour, Taemin had a hard time falling asleep. How often had he cursed at Minho, thinking that the taller had lived an easy life? Back then he would have never imagined the taller to have lived through anything like this. Taemin had never really had a family, so he was completely unable to imagine how devastated the older must have been. He had judged him wrong, something that taught him once again, that you never know what is going on in another person’s life by just looking at the surface.

Knowing that he would never quite be able to grasp what Minho had been through, Taemin was unsure how to act around the older male, which made breakfast more uncomfortable than it should have been.

“You don’t have to treat me differently, you know?” Minho said after a while – he knew exactly why Taemin was behaving the way he was.

“I am sorry”

“Don’t be. Let’s just keep acting the way we used to.”

“So, you mean I should curse at you again?” Taemin joked, trying to overcome the awkward barrier between them.

“That would be great.” A small smirk played around the taller’s lips.

“By the way, don’t you have to go to work these days?” Minho added after realizing that it was Monday and he was missing his classes.

That moment, Taemin jumped up. “OH SHIT” he cursed. He had forgotten about the fact that he should be at work early today because he had to finish a choreography that was scheduled for Friday. He needed at least three days to teach it to the other dancers, so they should start training tomorrow. This meant today would be the deadline for the choreo.

He ran over to the small room, almost tripping over the blankets on the floor to grab his phone out of Minho’s backpack where he had left it last night.

“Shit, no battery” he mumbled when he failed at turning it on.

“Out of battery?” Minho, who had followed the long-haired male, asked.

“Yes. I think we should leave. Jonghyun is not going to be happy about this.”

“Wait a second.” The taller then said, turning around to get into one of the other rooms.

A few minutes later – Taemin had spent the time cleaning up the room to leave as soon as possible, Minho returned with a big grin on his face and a charger in his hand.

“You know, I actually used to have a similar phone ages ago and I left my charger here after getting a new phone. Plug it in for a few minutes so you can call them that you will be back soon.”

Half an hour and a very unpleasant phone call later, the two were sitting in the car on their way back to Seoul. Even though Jonghyun had told him to take the weekend off because of his injuries, he did expect him to finish the choreography in time so he could take a look at it tonight. He wasn’t happy to hear that Taemin wouldn’t be at the club before noon.

“Are you alright?” Minho asked after an almost completely silent drive when they arrived at the club.

“Yes, I think I am. Thank you so much!”

Taemin was almost out of the car when he turned around again.

“Actually” he started “Can you dance?” Taemin blurted out, regretting it instantly.

“Uhm…” the question took the older by surprise. He wasn’t a bad dancer if he could believe what others said, but he surely was no dancer in the sense of being a ‘DANCER’.

“I guess?” He therefore answered questioning his own dancing skills.

“Would you mind coming in just for half an hour? I think I need someone to try out a few moves if I want to finish this up until tonight.”

Minho was absolutely flabbergasted by the other’s request. He couldn’t think of anything better than to see Taemin dance again, but on the other hand he had no idea if it was a good idea to have him dance for him privately.

“That was bold for someone who is not interested in me.”

“I never said I wasn’t interested in you.”

“So you are?” Minho’s eyes got smaller – not quite believing Taemin after all these times that the long-haired male had denied any feelings for him.

“I said, I am not interested in you romantically.”

“That is a pitty though.”

Rolling his eyes, Taemin turned around again to get out of the car. Minho didn’t seem to be up for coming with him, so he should get to work as soon as possible.

“No, Wait.” The taller then said. “I will just park the car. Wait for me, I’ll be there in a second.”

Just a few minutes later, Taemin walked the familiar path through the corridors of the club that led to the dance studio. He was closely followed by Minho who was carefully taking in his surroundings. After passing the bar, the stage and finally the dressing rooms where Taemin had first met Minho, they were now in the very back of the club.

“The studio is right out here” Taemin said, opening a door which led outside. Just after stepping out, he turned left and descended a few more steps just to open another door.

“I didn’t know there were places like this” Minho said, impressed at the small open space in between concrete walls of the surrounding buildings. There was no way to this small yard other than the door of the club which Minho shut closed behind him. A small bench was standing against one wall, an ashtray filled with used cigarettes underneath.

“It isn’t really the nicest spot but good enough to take a break from the stuffy air in the club.” Taemin said, noticing that Minho wasn’t following him down the second stair. “But I spend most time in the studio anyway.”

Taemin disappeared into the studio and Minho followed instantly. When he made it into the lit-up room, it took a moment for him to process what he saw: The room was way bigger than he thought. There were a few poles installed in one corner, several chairs stacked against another wall, a couch, a big music installation with speakers on every wall as well as another door right next to the couch. But the most impressive thing were the walls. Three of them were completely made of mirrors, making Minho see himself several times, while the fourth one looked like it was made from genuine bright wood.

“You can leave your jacket over there” Taemin said, pointing at the couch while he opened the door next to it. “I’ll just go and change.”

When Taemin came back, Minho was sitting on the couch, somehow nervous to be alone in this room with the long-haired male. The latter was now only wearing black shorts and a white top that would easily be see-through if it got just slightly wet.

“Alright, I will just warm up for a few minutes. Feel free to look around the back room, or just stay here. I don’t care.”

“Can I join you?” Minho asked, making Taemin lift his eyebrows.

“You want to join my warm-up? Why would you?”

“I have always been into sports, don’t pretend to be surprised.”

Taemin nodded, he knew that Minho liked sports - his body was speaking for its own, but he still hadn’t expected the other to join his training.

“Would you have some trainers for me?” Minho then asked, pointing at his jeans. “I don’t want to sweat through these.”

“Hmmmm I don’t have the key to the other dancer’s lockers… so I guess you would need to wear one of mine, not sure if they fit though.”

Minutes later, Minho came out of the small dressing room, wearing a white old shirt that even had a few holes in the thin fabric and black trainers that were more than just a little too tight – his hands covering most of his crotch.

“Nothing I haven’t seen before boy.” Taemin said, chuckling at the sight of Minho trying to hide his privates from him. “You were the one who wanted to join me. Don’t blame anything on me.”

“I am not blaming you for anything…” Minho said, making Taemin laugh again, the taller was incredibly adorable when he wasn’t pretending to be cool.

“Well then, let’s get started.” Taemin instructed Minho as good as he could, kind of impressed at the way Minho was able to move. Somehow, he hadn’t expected the tall male to be very flexible, but in fact he was, and the long-haired male made some changes in his plan.

Originally, he had just wanted to use Minho to help with the placement of certain moves that were supposed to be danced in a pair. The choreography he was working on was one that needed two parties. It had been Jonghyun’s idea, he wanted his dancers to dance in pairs – show some sexual tension not only between dancers and guests but now also in between the dancers.

Seeing Minho’s muscular body move, made him re-think.

“Alright, that’s enough.” Taemin said after around 20 minutes of stretching and simple dance moves. Minho was standing there, waiting for the younger to give further instructions.

“Alright, so I will need you to help me out with the new choreography. It is supposed to be danced in pairs, and it is way easier to make it if there is a second person to try out the moves with.”

“I am not that good of a dancer; I will barely be of help.” Minho tried to get himself out of the deal now. He didn’t know the choreography Taemin was talking about, but from what he had seen that night, he was pretty damn sure that he wouldn’t be able to hold himself back from ravishing Taemin’s body when he was part of it.

“You’ll be fine.” Taemin said, not getting the reason why Minho declined.

The first few minutes, Taemin got into the music, trying to remember all the steps he had planned on before, sometimes taking out a little booklet with his notes to make sure he’d got it right. But too soon, he gestured Minho to stand next to him, trying out several different positions of wrapping his leg around the taller’s body while watching himself in the mirror closely.

All Minho did, was stand there, trying to ignore the fact that the hottest man in the universe was pressing himself against his body. Sometimes, Taemin moved away, changing the moves prior to hugging the taller male to find whichever connection was smoothest.

It went on like that for a while, Minho just sometimes backing away slightly when the long-haired male came too close to his privates. Every single time he did so, Taemin just laughed it off.

“Could you try to follow some of the moves?” the dancer then asked, and Minho was so close to say no, but if he were honest to himself, he actually really wanted to move his body against Taemin’s and what would be a better option than this place?

About half an hour later, they had made quite some progress, Taemin sometimes stepping away to take notes.

It started with them walking to each other from two opposite corners. While they were walking, Taemin was staring at him, but Minho had a hard time to keep his gaze focused on the other’s eyes. Whenever they made eye contact, he suddenly felt hot and needed to look away. It didn’t really matter anyway because just seconds after, Taemin was close enough to bring his left hand up to hold onto the taller’s neck, his fingertips buried in the dark hair. Minho’s own hand was placed on the other’s waist, holding him tightly so Taemin could bend backwards. The dancer let go of Minho’s neck, circling his leg around Minho’s strong body and bending back even further, his arms moving in circles through the air gracefully.

After this first figure, a long part of contemporary-style dancing followed where Minho just stood in the room, watching how Taemin moved along the wooden tiles gracefully. The latter had told him that this would be danced by both dancers simultaneously, so there was no need for Minho to help. That was until the chorus of the song played started. That moment, Minho was expected to be lying on the floor, his face facing the ceiling, feet on the ground, knees bent.

The moment when Taemin’s face appeared upside down above him, the latter had his hands placed next to Minho’s face, the taller’s heart always stopped. Even though Taemin’s body wasn’t hovering above him – it was only his head, Minho blushed as he knew the thrusts that the dancer sent towards the floor, he had seen them once when Taemin had showed him the moves. Actually, Minho was supposed to move his hips upwards, basically thrusting the air, but after blushing too much the first time he gave it a try, Taemin told him to just keep lying there.

During all this time while they were practicing, Taemin had been recording and re-watching the scenes of the two of them dancing together. Sometimes they ended up doing things up to twenty times until Taemin was content with the way it looked.

Only now the older realised how much work it actually was to make a choreography like this and started to respect the dancer even more.

There was one more contemporary part until the next chorus started. Up to now, they had only practiced to this point, so there was no way that Minho could have been prepared for what came.

“I have an idea for this part, let me just try it one time, I won’t need you to do it more than once. I just want to see if it looks good.” Taemin said, stretching his arms a little while turning on the music, not leaving any room for Minho to say anything.

“Lie down again.” He said “Hands on your stomach”

Already used to following Taemin’s instructions, Minho did as he was told. The taller watched as Taemin was closely eyeing the male beneath him. Then out of nowhere, Taemin jumped forward, into a tilted handstand right above Minho’s head, slowly moving his body down onto Minho’s in a wave, basically thrusting his hips to the taller’s crotch area.

The second Taemin’s body touched his, Minho hurried away.

“Are you serious?! What was that?!” Minho was angry now, not letting Taemin speak, even if he wanted to.

“Do you have any idea what your touch does to me?! You always say you are not interested, that you don’t want me to get the wrong idea about our relationship. And then, you do shit like this? How the fuck am I to interpret this whole thing today? You invited me to dance with you, I am wearing the tightest pants possible and you keep touching me! It isn’t what I agreed to. I am leaving.”

But before Minho could get up, Taemin rushed forward, throwing Minho over with a hiss, so he was now towering above Minho’s lean body.

“I don’t know what I am doing.” Taemin mumbled, watching how the older’s expression changed from annoyed and angry to confused and uncomfortable. “I am so sorry. I really don’t want to hold back.” The younger’s voice was barely a whisper and before Minho could only grasp the meaning of Taemin’s words, the latter had already sealed their lips in an almost violent kiss.

It took a second for Minho to follow the dancer’s lead. But the softness of Taemin’s lips overshadowed all the thoughts that flew through Minho’s mind at that moment, making them disappear and let something else take over control of the tall male’s actions. Taemin used his whole weight to hold down the strong male, pressing his body on Minho’s while kissing the latter hard.

There was way too much teeth involved for it to be labelled a controlled kiss. From time to time, the long-haired male’s hands would travel across Minho’s trapped body, leaving tingling skin all over. Several times, Minho tried to turn them around but no matter how hard he tried, the dancer had him fixed on the floor, not leaving any room for the tall male to swap positions.

The younger soon grew bored of what he was doing and removed his own shirt, revealing the lean muscles and beautiful artwork on his skin and Minho couldn’t but stare at the dancer’s body. He would never get over the fascination Taemin’s body gave him. The latter was still sitting on his crotch area where his member started to wake slowly and threw his shirt. Minho couldn’t stop himself from sitting up and start roaming Taemin’s body with his hands as soon as the latter had removed the fabric covering his body.

Taemin instantly stopped Minho’s hands, looking at him with the same look he had given him that night they spent at the hotel.

“No touching. You haven’t paid.” The dancer said and Minho’s face fell.

“I didn’t pay? Is that what this is? You want money?” he asked, obviously hurt by Taemin’s words.

“I don’t mean it like that…”

“So how do you mean it? I thought you wanted to do this. But if you are treating this just like another appointment I will leave.” Minho said with the intention to get up and pack his things. It was bad enough that Taemin didn’t have romantic feelings for him but that moment when he kissed him, he thought there was at least some physical attraction between them. Maybe he had hoped for Taemin to open up to him after they spent the last 24 hours together. Maybe he had even hoped that he might have developed feelings for him as well. After all he called him in his weakest moment. Hearing those words were like a shot in the back, crushing all the hopes he had.

“That’s not it. I just…” Taemin started but Minho interrupted him.

“I don’t want to be one of those men.”

“You are not. I just… I… I never slept with anyone when it included feelings.” Taemin said, his voice soft and Minho felt his anger dissolve while he looked at the usually strong male being shy.

“You have never had sex with anyone just because you wanted to?” Minho asked. That wasn’t something he could imagine. He, who have laid with many people in his life had a hard time understanding how it would be to never have slept with anyone on their own accord while being so experienced in the act itself.

“Why would I want that? Do you think I enjoy men sticking their dick up my ass? Because, or the record, I don’t.”

“Well, that’s not the only way to have sex…” Minho said while realising that Taemin had never experienced sex for pleasure. To him who had only seen it as a source of pleasure that was hard to imagine. He loved sex. It was something he almost needed. It was so natural that it hadn’t occurred to him that someone would not see intercourse and intimacy that way. He felt the need to show the dancer how sex could feel.

“How about you top?” Minho said from his heart. It was like a switch that flipped inside him. If someone had told him a day ago that he would ever be offering his butt-virginity to someone, he would have called them crazy. Maybe it was because of the dream he had, maybe it was because it pained him that Taemin, the man he had feelings for, never experienced real intimacy, intimacy that is for the pleasure of both people.

He didn’t regret what he said even if he was afraid. What would he do if Taemin agreed? Would he really give himself to the long-haired male? Would he need to be prepared like Taemin? Wouldn’t that be awkward? Did it put his masculinity in question? There were many things Minho worried about in that moment but none of those felt important enough to pull back his offer. He wanted to make Taemin feel good. He wanted to be the first one to give him an experience like this. It would be a lie if he said he didn’t expect more from this than just a one-time fling. Maybe Taemin would consider opening his heart for him if this went well?

“You would let me top?” the dancer said in disbelief, still sitting on Minho’s lap. “Why?”

This question wasn’t answered easily. Minho was quiet for a few seconds before moving into dangerous waters. He didn’t want to keep talking. His blood was still pumping through his veins simply because Taemin sat on his crotch. So, instead for answering the question he sealed Taemin’s lips with his own, gently moving his lips to show Taemin instead of telling him.

It wasn’t long before the dancer couldn’t hold back anymore, and Minho felt the shift instantly. Taemin, who had been passive when he first kissed him, suddenly started deepening the kiss, and put his arms around Minho’s neck while he was doing so. His body was moving according to the kiss – whenever Taemin changed the angle, his whole body moved with his head, crotch rubbing on Minho’s lower abdomen.

At some point during the heated kiss, Taemin’s hairband fell off and his hair was flowing open now; He looked even more stunning than he had just seconds ago. There was so much going on, Minho could barely concentrate on one thing. He knew where this was going, And despite the fact that he was afraid, he was also exited. The way Taemin kissed him now was nowhere near the kiss they shared in the hotel. That one had been cold and rehearsed while this one was hot and messy. Stings of saliva connected their mouths whenever they gasped for air.

Minho’s mind was clouded and all he could do was keeping up the kiss while Taemin’s hands gripped onto his collar. The younger’s finger was inserted in a small hole in the fabric, ripping it apart which left him bare, without anything covering his naked, sweaty upper body.

“Fuck. Your body is so nice.” Taemin almost moaned before lowering his face to messily lick all over the sweaty skin, following a trail from his left armpit to the right, paying some special attention to the pink buds.

Minho on the other hand was unable to react to anything. With all the experience he had in bed, never had anyone taken so complete control over him. He knew that he was the one who brought it up, he knew that he was the reason why Taemin was acting like this. And to his surprise he wasn’t feeling uncomfortable but helpless. Seeing the dancer hungrily licking his body, covering it in saliva was overwhelming in a way he had never been overwhelmed before. He didn’t know what to do. As long as he was in control, he knew how to act. But now that he was lying there on the cold floor of the dance studio, the gorgeous male above him, he had no idea what to do with his hands and his body in general.

As if Taemin could read his mind, the younger took a hold of Minho’s big hands while he was nibbling on the other’s erect nipples, squeezing them gently with his lips and teeth. It was a strange gesture, not one the taller had expected but it calmed him down.

“Just relax” Taemin whispered against the wet buds, making Minho shudder at the sudden coldness around his nipples. At some point while Taemin was caressing his hand with his thumb and sucked on his skin, Minho’s head turned off and his instincts took over. He didn’t know what made the difference, but suddenly he felt safe. Taemin seemed to know what he was doing and he trusted him.

“Let me look at you.” Minho said softly, making the dancer look up.

“Eager, are we?” the latter gave back.

“I wouldn’t call it eager” Minho said. Now that he was in the position to say something, he regained some of his confidence. “You are just pretty hot.”

Taemin laughed. The way Minho had said it was cute to him. As if he really meant it in a good way, not only what he got from the horny men who usually were the people looking at his body.

“You are not the only one telling me that, you know? Better get more creative with your compliments.” The dancer teased getting off his lap. “Take off your pants.” He then ordered Minho who looked at him as if he had seen a ghost a second before gladly complying.

As soon as the tall male’s pants were off his legs, Taemin took care of Minho’s boxers, almost violently pulled them down, revealing the older’s pubic hair-framed private parts.

“Stand” Taemin said with a smirk on his lips and Minho did as he was told, getting up from the floor slowly, facing the dancer. His left hand covered his semi-erect penis – he felt exposed, standing in the middle of a big room, that was completely lit up, mirrors all along the wall. That was why he tried to focus all his attention either on the floor or on Taemin who was watching his every move closely.

After standing in the middle of the room, facing each other for a few seconds, Taemin bent down to remove both his pants and underwear in one go, leaving both of them naked. While Minho was blushing hard, the dancer didn’t seem to feel any shame, staring at the other male’s body.

“I have no idea why you are so uncomfortable. I mean look at yourself. You look like a Greek god and believe me I have seen many naked men. You definitely are in the top tier.” Taemin said, noticing the other male carefully trying to avoid looking into the mirror.

“Turn around, look at me through the mirror” the dancer then said, Minho following his order after a few seconds of hesitation.

Minho looked at Taemin’s flawless body, how the owl on his chest was a perfect contrast to his fair skin, the erect nipples surrounded by goose bumps due to the cold air in the room. The other’s soft, dark member that was hanging between his legs, pubic hair surrounding it - fading into a small trail that ended at his belly button. Next to his private parts, on the hips, Minho could make out a faint line in the skin that looked like it was a scar. He didn’t want to be caught staring at it, so he quickly looked away.

While Minho was taking in Taemin’s whole body with hungry eyes, the latter moved closer bit by bit, until he was standing behind the tall male, his small, soft hands holding onto his broad shoulders.

“You look stunning yourself.” Taemin whispered into Minho’s ear. Minho didn’t want anything more than to continue what they were doing, so he just turned around and pressed his lips back on Taemin’s soft ones, earning a pleasant groan from the shorter male who instantly deepened the kiss.

By now, their naked bodies were pressed against each other, privates rubbing together, both their members getting hard, Minho’s faster than Taemin’s. The younger’s hand found Minho’s and took a tight grip on the taller’s wrists, making it impossible for him to keep petting his hair.

The kiss got messier the longer it was going on, Taemin’s skilled mouth working wonders while he grinded his hips against Minho’s in a steady, controlled rhythm. The taller felt the deep desire to ravish all of the dancer’s body with his hands, but the latter wasn’t letting him go, no matter how much he wiggled his hands to get them out of Taemin’s tight grip.

It wasn’t long before the taller moved away from the kiss, breathing hardly while asking: “Why won’t you let my hands go?”

“I am afraid I will fall back into routines if you touch me.” the latter said, and Minho could have sworn to see a hint of sadness in his eyes. But he was more focused on what Taemin had said.

“You won’t.”

“You don’t know that. I am not sure if I can give you what you want. But I am trying my best here.” Taemin said in a soft voice. It wasn’t his intention to make the taller sad. No, he really wanted to give it a try. But feeling Minho’s hungry hands on his body immediately projected this situation to his usual setting of a client doing what he wanted to the prostitute he was paying for.

He could never find out if there really was something more to this relationship if he stayed in the familiar setting. It felt no different than with his customers. A big part of the excitement in him calmed down. Taemin was afraid of how Minho might react. The latter already looked disappointed.

“I am sorry.” Taemin said, opening the tight grip on Minho’s wrists.

“I am really confused.” Minho then said.

The dancer stepped away, leaving some space between their naked bodies. He knew that he needed to give the taller some kind of explanation.

“It is complicated…”

“I have time.”

There was a short moment of silence while Minho stared into Taemin’s eyes who nervously looked anywhere but back into the taller’s eyes.

“If you don’t want me to see you as another customer you will have to keep your hands to yourself.” The long-haired male said, confusing the other for a second before he elaborated what he had just uttered.

“Just, can you try and not touch me and let me take care of you? I am sure it sounds stupid to you, but every time you touch me, I feel as if I am sent back into the role of a sex-object. You said you wanted this, so I will need you to follow my lead, so I can do this my way.”

Minho understood – for the most part and even though it would be torture to not touch Taemin’s body, he nodded shortly

“It’s alright, we can figure something out. So, no touching? Not at all?” Minho said, surprising the younger who nodded.

“Especially not my hair… Maybe… If I place your hands somewhere, you can try and move them a little, but please stop if I touch them.”

Following Taemin’s wishes, Minho was just waiting with the hands hanging by his sides for him to make the first move. The latter had moved closer again, his face now only centimetres away from Minho’s so the taller just looked down into Taemin’s dark eyes. There was a short sparkle right before Taemin’s eyes closed and his hands found their way around Minho’s strong neck, pulling him down into a gentle kiss.

Taemin’s fingers curled, caressing Minho’s neck, while he slowly moved his soft lips against the other’s. It took a few minutes of gentle kisses until Taemin deepened the kiss. Minho had gotten incredibly impatient all along, using all of his will power not to simply take over and fuck Taemin on the cold floor of the dance studio.

“If I do anything you don’t like: Tell me” Were Taemin’s final words before his small hands grabbed the taller’s penis with a tight and skilled grip, making him moan at the sudden sensation.

“I don’t think I am going to ahhhhh--- complain if youuu, HOLY SHIT” Minho tried to speak but, Taemin’s pumps got stronger and faster, making it hard to speak between the involuntary moans that spilled out of Minho’s mouth. But before he could finish his sentence, the younger had slapped the sensitive member from the side, making it bounce back and forth while he kept watching it.

“Did I tell you already that you have the prettiest dick?” Taemin asked while enjoying the view of the taller male hissing and his red penis twitching.

“Why do you hit me then?!?” Minho moaned in slight pain.

“I was just trying something. You seemed like someone could enjoy this. I am sorry if you didn’t. I won’t do it again. I will get some lube, don’t think just lotion will do it for you. Don’t move.” The long-haired male just said, putting on his boxers and opened the door, just to slip outside the studio as fast as he could, almost running inside the narrow corridors of the club.

It was only a matter of a long minute until Minho watched the other male come inside again, locking the door behind him, a bottle of lube in his right hand. He didn’t even take the time to put the bottle down before getting rid of his boxers again, revealing a still hard member, slightly moving from all the running.

“Why did you really do that?” Minho said, moving away from Taemin’s hands who wanted to grab the taller’s member to lube it up.

“Why did I do what?”

“Hit me?”

“From what I got from our session, I guessed you were into dom-play. And you asking me to top was only strengthening my theory. So, I wanted to see your reaction.” Taemin said, unsure of what the result of his experiment was. “Didn’t you like it?”

“hmm.. not really. I am just… I don’t know, you confuse me.”

“So, you didn’t hate it?” Taemin said, hoping for the other not to shy away.

“I don’t think I did, but I know that I should.” Minho said, his face burning up as a blush crept up his face from embarrassment.

“Just tell me if you want me to stop doing something. And believe me, nothing is strange to me. Just relax, it makes everything easier. The whole idea here is that I give you a good time isn’t it?” The long-haired male said, watching how the taller’s expression changed to an even more confused one.

“The point of this is that we both have a good time.” He said and Taemin thought for a second before speaking again.

“I will keep going then?”

Minho just nodded while still watching the younger with curious eyes while Taemin gestured him to turn around.

“Here we go, would you mind turning around for me? Ass in the air.” Taemin asked, but Minho knew that this was not a question. The taller did as he was told, unsure why he was following the other’s orders so easily, but he knew that now wasn’t the time to think about things like this.

It wasn’t long until Taemin’s fingers were massaging Minho’s puckered hole, covering it I lube as good as he could.

Minho shuddered from the strange sensation when the younger started stretching his anus gently. From pure interest, he made the mistake to look at the mirror. The picture that was presented to him was embarrassing at the least. His half-lidded eyes stared back at him while Taemin was watching his hole closely, following his movements with his eyes while biting on his lips in desire.

The long-haired male’s hands were working fast and precise for the next few minutes until he removed them from Minho’s warmth, licking them while looking at Minho’s face through the mirror. A small moan came from Taemin’s throat and shortly after, he buried his face between Minho’s cheeks, trying to get a taste of the taller’s inside more directly.

But Minho’s head shot up and stared at the other male in shock.

“oh gosh. Don’t. It is dirty!” He said, wiggling away from Taemin’s touch.

“Believe me I have eaten dirtier asses like you. You taste delicious. But you are right, we’ll have to clean you before I go further.” He brought his face back down, just licking over Minho’s hole once while the latter was blushing, not quite knowing how to react.

Between his legs, Minho’s dick was hanging – already completely hard as he couldn’t deny that he did enjoy the sensation of Taemin’s tongue lapping his insides.

“I could do this all day” Taemin said while taking a short break. “But I guess we don’t have time for that. Come to the shower for a second."

Taemin then led the way and soon enough the two men stood in the washing room, the younger holding something in his hand that Minho could only guess its function. It looked an awful lot like a plastic pump and the taller was very much opposed to having this thing anywhere near his asshole.

While Minho was standing by the side, his boner slowly dying down, Taemin filled the pump with lukewarm water.

"Touch yourself" the long-haired male said after throwing a short look over to where the taller’s dick had almost returned to its natural state.

It needed another very intense stare for Minho to start rubbing his limp penis back to life.

"Since you are not usually taking it in the ass, I will be cleaning you out first." He said and just as he felt Minho getting ready to protest, he added: "Or do you usually clean the shit out of your anus when you take a shower?"

Minho had nothing to hold against that so Taemin continued: "Believe me, you don’t want dirty sex. At least not the first time. It's a lot to clean up after. Bend over."

“This is so strange.” The tall male said. He wasn’t quite sure if he liked where this whole situation was headed. A single glimpse in Taemin’s direction though, was enough for him to voluntary bend down, showing off his behind to the younger male who instantly got to work. Minho promised himself never to speak about the next few minutes to anyone at any point in his life.

While Taemin was cleaning his ass as if it was the most natural thing to do, Minho wanted to disappear. Disappear and never see the light of day again.

“You are all done.”

“Oh god that was the worst thing I have ever done.” Minho moaned, getting back up, following the other male back to the bigger room where they had left the lube.

“Don’t lie to me, I know that the sensation can feel good. Also, you are still hard.” Taemin pointed out while reaching behind him to grab Minho’s hard-on and rub the soft skin for a few seconds.

“Let’s get back” Taemin then said, leading the way back to the studio, grabbing his jacket on the way out of the small room on the side. To Minho’s surprise, the younger spread the jacket on the floor, gesturing him to lie down on the dark fabric.

“What are you waiting for?” Taemin said when Minho didn’t move.

“It’ll get dirty, I am fine with the floor.”

“You are clean, I am clean, and lube is washed out easily, so don’t be a pussy and lie down. I don’t want you to be cold.” The dancer took Minho’s big hands in his, guiding him down onto his jacket, making the tall male lie flat on the floor with him towering above him once more.

It wasn’t long until they were all over each other again, Taemin’s hands making their way to the taller’s tights, spreading his legs so his fingers could reach Minho’s ass while kissing the latter’s lips passionately. His second hand had opened the bottle of lube, and now squeezed a big amount of the colourless liquid into his palm. Taemin was sitting in between the taller’s legs, his dick placed on Minho’s while he was warming up the lube in his hands.

“Here we go.” Taemin smirked, moving back to be able to reach Minho’s crack, spreading lube all over the other’s hole, sometimes dipping a fingertip inside to test out the waters.

It wasn’t long until the dancer was scissoring his fingers inside Minho’s hole, loosening it as good as possible, taking his time preparing the older male, adding more lube from time to time. Minho’s eyes were mostly closed, trying to get used to the unfamiliar feeling in his backside. Even though the jacket didn’t cover all of his body, he was still very thankful for the fabric that separated his body from the cold floor of the dance studio.

Sometimes, Minho opened his eyes only to see the gorgeous male above him watching his asshole intensely with hungry eyes that were mostly covered by hair. But whenever he did so, Taemin noticed that he was watched in a matter of seconds, looking back into the taller male’s eyes, smirking and whenever he did so, Minho blushed and closed his eyes again.

What seemed like ages later, Taemin pulled out his fingers completely with an obscene wet sound.

“I think you’re good.” He said, cleaning the excess lube of his fingers by rubbing it into his pubic hair.

Minho exhaled, only now noticing that he had only been breathing shallowly during the whole preparation time.

Taemin reached underneath Minho’s back, pulling out a sealed condom from his jacket and then ripping it open hungrily. After rubbing his member a few times, he rolled the condom on, holding it at the base.

Realization hit Minho, this penis was about to be inside of him. Taemin wasn’t big, but his tip was pretty wide, and the tall male was still wondering how he would be able to take rod like this. How much would his asshole be able to take? Does it stretch enough?

As if Taemin could read his mind, the latter reassured him with a rough voice while spreading more lube on both his dick and Minho’s hole.

“Just relax, I know what I am doing. Do you trust me?”

“I do” Minho answered in a rough voice.

“Good. Here we go.”

Taemin’s hand was holding his base tightly, keeping the condom in place, while the other one was making sure it was properly inserted.

“The tip is the most painful, so bear with me.” Taemin said, pressing his soft tip against the puckered rim. “Relax now, otherwise it will hurt more. Exhale Minho.” He said, and Minho did as he was told, feeling his muscles relax a little, allowing Taemin to push inside slowly.

It burned. The stretch was worse than the fingers before, making Minho hiss and his muscles cramp down on the foreign organ that had penetrated his hole.

“AH FUCK” Taemin moaned when his tip was squeezed inside Minho’s walls. His breath got faster as he tried to calm down. “Relax!” He managed to utter between hard breathing while he was spending all his energy on staying put and not thrusting his dick inside the hot tightness he hadn’t felt in ages.

“Please relax. I don’t want to hurt you.” Taemin moaned, his hands gripping Minho’s hips harder.

“It hurts” Minho said, his voice barely a whisper, face distorted in pain. His hands holding onto the dark fabric of Taemin’s jacket for dear life.

“I know it does. Just relax for a second. I will pull out.” Taemin said, bringing his fingers to Minho’s rim, gently caressing the puckered hole to make him relax.

When Taemin felt the walls loosen slightly, he pulled out as gently as possible, but his tip got stuck at the tight rim, making it more painful than it should have been.

“Shit I am so sorry.” Taemin said when a painful screech left Minho’s mouth the moment Taemin’s dick was completely removed from his anus.

Taemin moved away a little, feeling guilty for hurting the taller male. It took a while for the latter to calm down. But eventually he did.

“Does it always hurt this much?” he asked, looking up at the dancer who still watched him with worried eyes.

“The first few times… it gets a little better with time.”

“Then let’s try again.” Minho said, holding himself up on his elbows, watching Taemin closely. The younger didn’t seem very happy with what he had said.

“Let me do something different for now.” Taemin said, removing the condom from his wet dick, throwing it on the floor next to them.

“What are you doing?” Minho asked in confusion.

Taemin moved on top of him again, his hands finding the taller’s hot member. He wasn’t hard anymore, the pain had taken over, so the dancer started to rub the taller’s member back to life. As soon as it was erect again, he made Minho move a little so he could pull out a second condom from his jacket, putting it on Minho's dick with one rehearsed move.

A few licks on the soft tip made Minho shudder and a small moan escaped his lips. It wasn’t the first time that Taemin was giving him head. But this time felt different. It felt more personal. It felt more intimate.

The dancer’s soft hands were gently caressing the skin on his hips while his lips wrapped themselves around the crown of his manhood, barely touching it. Minho’s eyes closed while Taemin’s tongue putting all attention on the area where the head was connected to the shaft.

It wasn’t long until Minho was moaning, Taemin taking all of him inside his hot cavern, his tongue flat against the underside of the throbbing length.

The taller’s hands were cramped beside him, trying his best not to take a hold of Taemin’s beautiful long hair, while the latter was bobbing his head along his sensitive shaft. While his mouth was doing most of the work, the younger’s hands were gently massaging Minho’s testicles. When he felt them tighten, pointing at Minho’s orgasm nearing, he got off the hot member with an obscene noise, making the taller whine because of the sudden loss of warmth.

“Has anyone ever deep-throated you?” Taemin then asked and Minho just nodded, the desire too strong to hold back his enthusiastic reaction.

“Just don’t start thrusting before I give you a sign - also, don’t you dare cum while you are in my mouth. I don’t want to choke on your throbbing dick.” The cum wasn't Taemin's problem, the condom would take care of that. But it was a natural reaction for the penis to twitch uncontrolledly and if it happened while settled deep in his throat it could be painful.

While speaking, the long-haired male laid down onto the floor, looking into the taller male's eyes who stared right back at him.

“What are you waiting for?” Taemin said when Minho wasn’t moving. “Let me finish you off. Trust me.”

“Why are you laying down?” Minho asked, it would be so much easier to just get on his knees.

“You need to have a certain angle to be deepthroated. It is easier like this. Believe me. You can get further down if my mouth is properly aligned with my throat.”

Minho did as he was told, moving closer and then aligning his hard member with Taemin’s soft lips. He was almost in a push-up position, his testicles running along Taemin’s face as he shoved his dick in the dancer’s mouth. It felt strange to be in this position as he felt Taemin’s breath on his balls and half of his dick inside of Taemin’s hot mouth.

Even though the position was strange, he enjoyed how it felt like. It didn’t quite make sense to him yet how this would be easier. But then the dancer did something no one had ever done to him and he understood. Taemin opened his throat and swallowed around his member and because he had nicely aligned throat by bending his head back it was possible for the hard organ to enter completely.

“HOLY SHIT” Minho almost screeched at the foreign feeling of Taemin’s throat trying to close around his sensitive tip. Whatever he had thought deep throating was, this was another level of deep throating which almost sent him over the edge the first second.

Taemin made a small hand sign to tell Minho he could start moving when he relaxed his throat well enough. And the taller male didn’t waste a second before starting to slowly pull out and thrust back into the dancer’s throat.

“This ahhhh feels amazing” Minho moaned while listening to the squelching noises Taemin’s throat made. The latter’s eyes were red and filled with tears while he was holding his breath and concentrating not to gag but Minho couldn’t see because he was looking the other way, having a perfect view on Taemin’s own erection who laid against his abdomen glistening with precum.

Realising that Taemin shouldn’t be able to breathe properly like this, he pulled out unwillingly, letting the dancer catch his breath for a few seconds, also spitting out the saliva that had collected in his mouth before Minho entered his mouth again and he had to get back into the previous position.

“FUCK” Minho groaned, when he felt the dancer’s hand grab his own, removing it from its previous position next to Taemin’s body on the floor placing it right on the bulging spot where Minho’s dick was placed inside the long-haired male’s throat – giving the taller male the chance to feel his own movement.

“What the- F.---” Minho was a mess. Just a few thrusts later, Taemin slapped the taller’s hand away, removing the dick from his throat with an obscene plop as he had felt Minho’s nearing orgasm. Without a break, the dancer got up, pressing their members against each other, his hand jerking them off together. By now Minho was a moaning mess, his head thrown back in pleasure.

“Look at yourself in the mirror” Taemin ordered in a raspy voice, his vocal cords still not recovered from the earlier actions. Completely lost in his pleasure, Minho did as he was told. And what he saw sent him over the edge immediately.

He saw Taemin looking at his face hungrily while his beautiful long hair was flowing over his shoulders messily. He saw his own face, sweaty and lost in pleasure. He saw two men standing in front of each other, their dicks between them, wet and messy. He saw his own semen ejaculating into the the condom while the dancer's soft hand kept pumping the length.

But Taemin didn’t stop – he continued rubbing their dicks together until he also came, his cum spreading all over his member and Minho’s condom while the latter whined because of the overstimulation of his sensitive member.

And then, after catching their breath, both spoke at the very same.

“Fuck.”

Only their reasons were different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quite a lot has happened....
> 
> Thoughts? hehhe


	18. Naver-Maps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N  
> Trigger warning for slight drug-use and mentioned self-harm

“Fuck” They both said at the same time, but for different reasons.

Coming down from their high, Minho vulgarly exclaimed how good it felt, while Taemin was cursing at the fact that he had lowered his guard. Now, Minho would clearly never back off anymore. He would have to find a way to stay away from the taller as soon as possible. This relationship was predestined to fail.

There weren’t many words spoken after that. Mostly because Taemin cut Minho off every time he wanted to say something, only gesturing the taller to shower. As soon as the latter had left the room, Taemin put on his clothes, not caring about all the different kinds of fluid that still stuck to his body. He knew it was a mistake before he started it, so why hadn’t he been able to control himself? Taemin knew very well that this meant way more to Minho than it did to him. The other offered him his ‘first time’ - while he had been doing this almost on a daily basis. Sex didn’t mean anything to him. He wasn’t emotionally attached to what he did. But Minho most definitely was.

The way he wanted to talk after, the way he looked at him, the way Minho lowered his gaze when Taemin turned the cold shoulder. Taemin knew he fucked up the moment the taller walked towards the showers, his gorgeous body losing al tension, his slumped shoulders making it seem as if all energy has left him.

“Damn it.” He said to himself. Couldn’t he do anything right? Minho didn’t deserve this.

Unsure how he would be able to face Minho when the latter finished his shower, Taemin picked up the used condom, not even bothering to wrap it in a tissue but just throwing it into the bin by the music station. That was when his eyes found the camera, which was still in the position where they'd recorded the choreography earlier on.

He stopped in his tracks and grabbed the black device.

“Oh shit” he mumbled looking at the red dot in the upper right corner of the display. He was about to press the delete button when he stopped in his movement once more.

In the background the continuous sound of a running shower, Taemin pressed play.

“I have an idea for this part, let me just try it once, I won’t need you to do it more than once.” Taemin heard his own voice through the small speaker, immediately turning down the volume. He saw himself instructing Minho how to lie on the floor. He skipped a few minutes. He saw himself caressing Minho’s gorgeous body. He skipped a few minutes, he saw the two of them watching each other in the mirror, Minho blushing slightly when he set his eyes on Taemin’s dick.

A feeling of warmth spread through Taemin’s body while he was watching snippets of the recording, but not all of that feeling was sexual. He loved seeing the small changes in Minho’s face while he took off the latter’s underwear – even if he could barely make it out on the small screen. He loved seeing Minho’s body touched by his hands. He just loved seeing Minho in his arms. It hurt that he could never be his.

The shower turned off and Taemin was sure about one thing. He would delete this video – right after he watched it the whole way through just once. Minho and him? It would never work out. But he could at least, just this once, pretend that it was possible, that it might work.

Before Minho could walk in on him with the camera in his hands, he let it disappear into the drawer where it is usually stored, only taking out the memory card, safely placing it in the back pocket of his pants.

“I am done, you can go and wash up.” Minho said when he was exiting the shower, his hair still wet, water dripping onto his shirt. He didn’t look at Taemin, and it was obvious that he was thinking.

“Oh uhm…” Taemin said, heart beating for almost being caught with the memory card. “I am good.”

“Are you sure? I uhm… there was a lot of …--”

“I know, don’t worry, I am good. And I should finish the choreography now.” Taemin interrupted Minho who had walked over to where Taemin stood.

“What do you need me to do?” Minho asked, his tone slightly hopeful, maybe Taemin didn’t want him to leave? Maybe he did enjoy it? Maybe just maybe, Taemin would open up to him. All his wishes were crushed that moment when Taemin’s face got cold and he answered:

“I don’t think your help is still needed; I can do the remaining parts by myself. But thanks a lot.”

The expression on Minho’s face immediately changed from hopeful to devastated. Something Taemin had feared but expected to happen.

“Do you regret it?” Minho asked after a short silence, his feelings visibly hurt. He looked at Taemin with big eyes and the look in them was almost impossible for the dancer to bare. Minho wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear the answer, but he had to. The little hope he had that there was another reason for Taemin to act the way he did crumbled when the younger spoke again.

“I honestly don’t know.” Taemin told the truth. “I don’t know if I can be who you want me to be.”

“I don’t want you to be anyone.” Minho said moving closer.

“Just… you just need to give me time.”

“Is this because I couldn’t take you properly? We can try again, I am sure it will hurt less next time. I can take it!” Minho almost pleaded.

“It has nothing to do with you or anything you did.” The long-haired dancer answered, backing away.

“I see.” The taller mumbled, grabbing his things.

There weren’t many more words spoken before Minho left the dance studio, even refusing Taemin’s offer of seeing him out.

As soon as the taller was out of the room, Taemin’s muscles completely relaxed and he slid down the wall, unable to keep himself standing up. He couldn’t believe what he had done. His whole head was spinning. Not only did he take advantage of Minho, but also made him feel like he did something wrong. And even worse than that, he had sex with him even though he knew about the taller male’s feelings for him.

Before he could stop himself, he hit his head on the wall behind him and a few tears escaped his eyes, first silently but soon enough several sobs built in his throat and the tears started falling in shorter intervals.

Why couldn’t he ever do anything right? He had promised himself not to ever take advantage of someone. After all the older had done for him, this was how he thanked him. A fuck and leave. Minho had feelings for him, and he just sent him away because of his stupid fucked-up life right after sticking his dick in the other’s virgin hole. WELL DONE LEE TAEMIN.

It wasn’t easy for Taemin to concentrate on finishing the choreography and the memory card in his pants felt heavy every minute along the way. He was so distracted, even Jonghyun’s words when the latter payed Taemin a visit in the studio passed by him – mostly unheard.

Actually, the whole rest of the day, including the performance and the long walk home went past Taemin in a blur. All the dancer could focus on were the pictures of Minho offering himself to him which constantly filled his mind.

Mentally, he was completely worn out when he opened the door to their small apartment at 4 in the morning. Physically he was even more exhausted. It is a mystery how he even made it home.

When he woke up around noon, the faint line on his hips was, once more, covered by a new crust of brown dried blood.

“Tae?” a small voice whispered into the dark room the dancer slept in. “Are you awake?”

Kibum didn’t get more than a tired groan which he interpreted as an invitation anyway. Just seconds later, the curtains were pulled back, the light of the day provoking another, louder groan from Taemin who instantly covered his eyes with his blanket.

“It really stinks in here. How many times have I told you not to smoke inside?! This is going to spread through the whole apartment!” Kibum said, trying his best not to sound too angry – afraid he would scare the other off when he had a lot to talk about with the younger. A third groan left Taemin’s throat when he heard the window opening.

“Just let me sleep” He said, sounding like a hormonal teenager.

“I will be waiting at the table. Get up, I made breakfast” Kibum said and left the room without another word, closing the door behind him to keep the incredible stink of the smoke out of his precious apartment.

Kibum had been waiting for over fifteen minutes when Taemin finally opened the door and walked over to the set table. He hadn’t forgotten why he ran away from here. He hadn’t forgotten Kibum’s face when the latter found out he had been selling his body to random strangers. But the dancer was still too tired, mostly mentally, to care much about what happened to him.

“Are you alright?” Kibum asked, his voice gentle.

Taemin nodded, eating a spoonful of Kibum’s Ddok-Guk.

“I am guessing you don’t want to talk about it?”

“Is there much to talk about? I know it is disgusting – I am disgusting, and I know you are disappointed… I really don’t need to hear it.” Taemin said, his eyes fixed on the pieces of egg in his soup.

“What are you talking about, I am your friend. Can we please talk this out?” Kibum said, almost pleading after hearing his best friend talking about himself that way.

“No. I won’t. It is over in a few weeks, there is nothing to talk about.” Taemin said, letting his spoon fall into the hot soup.

“Can you not understand that I care about you? Why the heck did you do it?” Kibum’s voice got louder, demanding an answer from Taemin who had gotten up, leaving the older at the table by himself.

“It wasn’t because we are short on money, is it?” Kibum asked when Taemin was almost back at his door.

Taemin knew he couldn’t let the other find out that it was because of money – If Kibum found out, the older would quit University immediately.

“I craved Sex. And it is none of your business what I do in my sex life!” Taemin shouted back, slamming the door like a child - bringing small tears into Kibum’s eyes.

“If you wanted sex you could have just found yourself someone to do it with without getting payed” the raven-haired male mumbled, bringing his hand up to rub the tears out of his eyes.

Kibum had ditched his lectures, hoping he would be able to talk to Taemin if he were around. But he didn’t see a single hair of the younger until the latter had to leave for work. Kibum had been cleaning up, waiting for Taemin to change his mind and talk to him. But when the door to Taemin’s room finally opened, the intense smell of smoke reached Kibum’s nose and Taemin walked out, his hair covering his face.

Not even one word was spoken as the younger left the apartment, only grabbing his keys on the way out.

Knowing that Taemin wouldn’t be back until late at night, he looked at the clock and decided it wouldn’t be too late to go to his 4pm lecture.

Minho on the other hand didn’t even think about going to any lectures. He felt like nothing more than an empty shell the next morning. Following up on the alcohol he had consumed the evening before - because he couldn’t focus his mind on anything other than the long-haired gorgeous dancer he had fallen for way too hard - his head was pulsing and just getting up from the bed to go to the toilet was awful.

As if his head wasn’t enough, he also felt sore in his lower region, ripped skin that was trying to heal felt as if it was ripped open again every time he moved – not to speak of the pain he felt when sitting on the toilet seat.

He didn’t know why he expected anything from the younger male, but he had. Now, the day after, reality came crashing down on him. Taemin would never feel the same way. He told him it wasn’t his fault, but it obviously was. Thoughts were battling emotions. He couldn’t turn off what he felt for the dancer, he had fallen to far but staying close to the younger would keep hurting him. He knew he should never see him again. Nothing good was going to come of it. But as if by an invisible force he could feel himself being pulled towards Taemin. The need to explain, the need to apologize was so bad he almost called him. Instead he called the guy who used to sell him weed, getting himself a fair amount of small plastic bags filled with what used to relax him after his family passed. It wasn’t cheap, but money had never been an issue.

It was already dark outside when he filled his grinder with a small portion of the contents of the tiny plastic bag, grinding the two sides together until he had the familiar powder. He hadn’t rolled a joint in a while, but his hands remembered the moves for him, mixing the weed with tobacco, rolling it to a perfect doobie.

As soon as he inhaled the smoke, he started relaxing, the pain dimmed down, and his vision intensified. It felt good, it felt familiar.

He was watching the outside world, standing at his window, wind blowing the smoke he blew into the cold night air right back in.

“What are you doing?!” A loud voice shouted, startling Minho who had long left earth.

When he turned around his cheek met the painful slap of his grandmother’s hand, the almost finished joint falling on the floor.

“What the fuck?! Why are you hitting me?” Minho shouted back, immediately regretting doing so when he saw the look on his grandmother’s face.

“How dare you speak to me like that?”

“Your face looks funny when you are angry.” Minho mumbled, chuckling to himself which made the old woman’s face fall.

“I have enough of you. Ungrateful brat. Pack your stuff.” She said, voice low and demanding.

“What?” Minho said, his mind too clouded to completely grasp any meaning behind words.

“I said pack your stuff. You have 30 minutes and I want you out of the house.”

“You have to be joking old lady” Minho said, rubbing his red eyes

His grandmother did not reply but walked out of his room.

Had he just been kicked out of his own house? How dare that woman throw him out of the house? And then when his clouded mind made up several scenarios, all ending in him on the streets without anything, he started to panic.

Exactly thirty minutes later, some men he had never seen before accompanied him outside, demanding his credit cards, only leaving him with the little cash he had in his purse.

He didn’t manage to pack much into the black backpack he was currently holding in his hand. A few sets of fresh underwear, a new shirt, his laptop, a bottle of Soju, his phone and a charger. On top of all that was the framed picture of him and his family – a picture taken not long before everything changed. It had been on his sister’s birthday and they were all smiling brightly, sitting in their garden while eating cake.

When he was outside, inhaling the night air, he just sat down on the floor, not quite knowing where to go from here. It took a while until the effect of the drug started to lessen and when it did, he called Jinki.

Hoping his voice wouldn’t fail him, Minho dialled the number of his best friend. It took quite a few rings until the older finally took the call.

“Choi? Uhm… Why are you calling at this hour?” Jinki said, slightly out of breath.

“I wanted to ask if I can crash at your place tonight… My grandma just threw me out of the house” Minho said, voice more stable than he thought it would be.

“Your grandma threw you out of the house? Holy shit! Uhm Tonight… Tonight will be kinda tricky…what?” Jinki started and stopped when someone in the background said something Minho did not catch.

“Tonight will be hard…” Jinki mumbled

“Let me speak to him” Another voice demanded – Minho could only barely make it out.

“Wait don’t move, I’ll hold it for you.” Jinki said, quietly – obviously not something for Minho to hear.

“Hi Minho, this is Kibum” A hoarse voice said. “I won’t be home tonight, and Tae is probably working late, so feel free to use the apartment. My room is the one when you get in on the right. I will have Jinki send you the address and the codes to the lock. AHH” Kibum also sounded slightly out of breath, speaking so fast Minho could only understand half of it.

“Oh, Thank you. But…” He started, but the other had already hung up on him.

At least he wouldn’t have to sleep on the streets. Only a few seconds later, his phone vibrated – a text message from Jinki – an address and two numbers, nothing more. It would be quite a while to get there, Minho realised.

With Naver-Maps open, he first walked to the subway station, where he had to buy a T-Money card, since he usually drives everywhere he needed to go. The whole subway ride, a proud 25 minutes, he looked at the floor, trying not to attract any attention in his buzzed state.

Tripping out of the station he arrived at, he once again followed the map, taking a break when he was thirsty, drinking the Soju he had with him as if it were water. The neighbourhood got worse and worse as he kept walking. Cables in the air, trash outside the houses and the streets were poorly made and full of holes.

It is not the kind of place Minho would usually be in. The walk up and down hills was way too long for his drunk and drugged body but somehow, he made it to the building that had the right number on the front.

There were over 20 apartments – Kibum and Taemin living in number 205 which was on the second floor. After several tries of entering the code at the front door, Minho realised he was using the wrong one, quickly entering the other one, letting himself inside the old building. There was no elevator so stumbled upstairs.

Shortly he was standing inside a small apartment, turning on the light which was a simple light bulb on the ceiling.

Minho was exhausted. He took off his shoes, entering the living room. There were three doors, one was open – obviously the bathroom – the other two were closed. What did Kibum say? Which one was his?

“Dammit” Minho cursed realising that he was in the apartment where not only Kibum, but also Taemin, was living in. So, one of the rooms was Taemin’s. But this thought left his buzzed mind after a few seconds and he walked over to one of the doors. He was too tired. Who cared about Taemin, who cared about his grandmother, who the fuck cared?

Closing the door behind him, he almost fell over a few things that were lying on the floor when he made his way to the bed. He didn’t see much anyway as the only light source was the streetlamp from outside which hardly gave enough light for the tall male to make out silhouettes.

The last thing he noticed before drifting away, was the penetrant stink of cigarette smoke that filled his nostrils with every breath he took.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! There has been a lot on all of our plates I guess.. So i wasn't able to get to answering comments yet. I will do so today/tomorrow. so keep leaving them >< thank you soso much for all the love this is getting and i hope y'all are safe and well.  
> xx  
> r


	19. You Look Like Shit

Taemin didn’t go home directly after finishing his performances as he had been doing the last few weeks, but rather stayed for a few lap-dances more, surprising and angering the other dancers. After Taemin had given up on the private dances, the others were happy to have more business.

There wasn’t much time between the appointments, just about enough to have a few shots of Soju, that Taemin drank as if his life depended on it. After a handful of dances, he called it a night and got his make-up off his face before changing into his normal clothes.

While he was doing so, his vision was spinning and he realized that he drank too much. Driving home wasn’t an option, if he drove in that state, he would probably kill himself. But he didn’t want to leave the motorcycle at the club either, he would need it again tomorrow. Remembering the younger wanted to drive his motorcycle ever since he first saw it, he called Gyutae who was more than happy to come.

It took the younger a while to arrive at the club. During the spare time, Taemin joined a game the dancers were playing. It wasn’t complicated but there was a lot of kissing involved and Taemin found himself comparing the intoxicated making out and the kisses he shared with Minho. He didn’t particularly dislike how it felt as one of the new dancers who was still in training licked his lips hungrily, it just felt different. It didn’t feel as intimate. It felt the same way it always felt. Taemin’s lips responded out of sheer reflexes, falling into his practice as he started sucking on the other’s tongue.

After a few rounds, Taemin checked his phone and saw a message from Gyutae which said he would be at the club in a few minutes.

“Guys, I gotta leave.” Taemin said, standing up from the couch he had been sitting on. The dancer next to him held onto his leg though and he couldn’t walk away.

“NAHHH stay for another round.” The blonde said, looking at the long-haired male.

“Next time.” Taemin said, bowing down to take the dancer’s chin in his hand and pulled him into a short kiss that he ended with a smirk.

“Next time it is.” The other responded and let go of Taemin who walked out of the room as soon as he was free.

Outside he lit a cigarette while he waited for the younger to arrive.

“Hyung!” Gyutae shouted when he saw Taemin leaning against the motorcycle while smoking his cigarette.

“EYY there is my favourite person in the world!” Taemin shouted back, opening his arms for the smaller to hug him – paying close attention to not touching Gyutae’s hair with his burning cigarette.

“I can’t believe you finally called! I have been waiting for this moment ever since you first brought it up! But how drunk exactly are you?”

Taemin could see how exited the younger was and smiled genuinely for the first time that day.

“YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT?!?” the younger’s mood turned around drastically when Taemin told him why he had called him here. The dancer had only told him that he would be teaching him to drive, not that he would have to drive them home.

After a small argument and Taemin persuading Gyutae, that he was in fact in a state to teach him, they started with the basics. A little more than an hour of Taemin showing the younger the how the motorcycle worked, Taemin told Gyutae that he should now be ready to drive the two of them to Taemin’s apartment.

“We are going to fucking die if you let me drive that thing with you in the back.”

“Don’t worry girl, I am behind you and can take over any time.” Taemin calmed him down.

“You are fucking drunk...”

"As if I never..." Gyutae didn't let Taemin finish his sentence.

"Doesn't change the facts Hyung."

“It is now or never”

Finally, Gyutae gave in and quite some time later, they were arriving at the apartment complex Taemin’s apartment was at.

“That worked out great, didn’t it?” Taemin said when Gyutae stopped the motor with trembling hands. The young male was panting.

“We weren’t faster than a turtle and I almost died of a heart-attack whenever a car passed by us. If you call this great, then yes. Now what?”

“You stay over of course, Kibum is at Jinki’s tonight! We have a couch and you can have my blanket. Thank you for making my day not as awful as it started out.” Taemin said, hugging the smaller boy who shook him off instantly.

"Hyung, let's go inside."

“Just sit down on the couch.” Taemin said, walking over to get Kibum’s blanket on wobbly legs. He wouldn’t let Gyutae sleep in his Hyung’s bed since he would feel bad for offering it without asking the owner. And that was something he definitely didn’t want to do. Just the blanket though, that should be fine.

“Thanks, Taemin Hyung!” Gyutae said when the long-haired male returned with a dark blanket in his arms.

“No worries. Really. If you need anything – just feel at home. As long as you don’t go into Kibum’s or my room you can’t do wrong!”

Taemin loved how Gyutae didn’t ask any questions and just accepted the fact that he couldn’t enter their rooms.

“I will be fine. You should go to sleep as well Hyung”

“Gyutae-yah you have no reason to worry about me. I am the greatest Hyung you will ever have. I have it under control.” right before he wanted to turn around, he added: "Oh and try to be out of house before Kibum comes back. In case you meet him, you are a new dancer at the club."

Taemin turned off the light in the living room, walking over to the bathroom in the dark – being used to coming home at night, he knew his way around the apartment even if there was barely any light. Also, his intoxicated state was nothing new and didn't hinder his safe way to the coldest room of the apartment.There was no need to waste electricity when he could use the money for other things like water.

For a moment he thought he heard almost silent sobs but knowing it was just Gyutae and him in the apartment he just shook his head. Now he had even started imagining things. Fuck, Gyutae was right. He was a little too drunk even though he was starting to sober up a little, the exhaustion of the day creeped up on him and he had troubles registering what was happening around him.

It took him a while to get ready for bed as the world around him was turning and he had to throw up once or twice to get rid of the alcohol he had too much of. When he finally left the bathroom on his toes, he was able to hear the calm breathing of Gyutae who had fallen asleep on the sofa, completely spent from driving home his Hyung at 4 in the morning without any decent driving skills.

He closed the door of his room gently not to make a sound. In the darkness, he walked to the mattress on the floor, glad to finally be able to go to bed.

But other than a cold bed, he was met with a warm body.

Instantly, he shot back up. Who was in his bed?? in less than a second the long-haired male had made his way to the light switch, turning on the light without hesitation.

What he saw made his skin crawl. There he was, Choi Minho, the man that wouldn’t leave his mind even while he was dancing on the lap of another one, the one he thought about while kissing another man. He was about to shout at the sleeping male when he remembered Gyutae in the room next door. Not wanting to disturb the younger male who never slept enough anyway, he walked back over to the sleeping figure of the taller male.

Taemin was about to wake him up, when he noticed the uncomfortable look on Minho’s wet face. He looked as if he was having a nightmare. Now he also knew where the sobs he had been hearing earlier were coming from. It wasn’t his imagination, but Minho, who had been crying – judging from the wet cushion, for a while.

Sitting on the cold floor next to his mattress, Taemin was unsure how to handle the situation. He couldn’t throw Minho out, making a scene, but he didn't particularly like the idea of sharing his bed with him either. He tried to make himself believe that the only reason for him not throwing Minho out was Gyutae sleeping in the next room, but deep down he knew that he wouldn't have brought himself to disturb Minho in this state even if no one was at home.

That didn’t leave him with many other options. Just when he decided to sneak past Gyutae to sleep in Kibum’s room, Minho stirred a little, more tears streaming down his face, side wards, dripping down onto the old, dirty sheets.

Self-control failed him, and he brushed away some of Minho’s fresh tears with his thumb. A big mistake it seems, as the latter’s eyes opened at the featherlike touch of his hand.

“Taemin?” Minho’s voice was hoarse and barely audible.

Taemin, who didn’t know how to react, just nodded, looking into the other’s red eyes.

“I am so sorry.” The older managed to utter before the sobs were taking over again.

Taemin had no idea what was happening. All he knew that only minutes later he was holding a trembling and crying Minho in his arms, gently rubbing his back while his head was spinning.

He wanted to say something several times but never did, he wouldn’t want anyone to say anything to him either. Several times he wanted to leave and go to bed but every time he felt Minho’s strong hands fisting his shirt with more force, almost begging him not to leave.

In the end, he did not leave. At some point, his eyelids got heavier, and he fell asleep, holding Minho’s warm body in his arms.

Gyutae woke from a person opening the front door when the sun already showed midday.

“Ayy Minho, why aren’t you sleeping in my room?”

“Minho?” Gyutae said in a hoarse voice, rubbing his dry eyes.

“WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON MY COUCH?!” The raven-haired male shouted at the unfamiliar figure who was trying to grasp the situation. It was a young boy, barely legal and he looked as if he had seen a ghost.

“I- I…”

When Kibum realized that he must be terrified, he spoke again, softer this time.

“I didn’t want to startle you, but seriously, what are you doing here? Did Taemin bring you here?”

The boy nodded and Kibum put his bag on the floor, noticing the open door to his room.

“Woah woah, what is happening? Where is Minho?”

“Minho?” the boy asked again. Still not grasping the situation.

“Yes, Minho, tall, handsome with big eyes and a completely whipped for Taemin. But what’s your name again boy?” Kibum said, walking over to check his room, not finding any trace of the tall male.

“I... I didn't say yet... I am Gyutae...” the younger said, rubbing his eyes, remembering Taemin's words. If he met Kibum in the morning.

“Alright, I am Kibum. But seriously, have you seen a strange tall guy leaving the apartment? Because he told me he would be staying over.”

Gyutae who was slowly waking up was finally somehow capable of thinking properly.

“There was no one here when Taemin and I came here…”

“I better call him then. If you are hungry, take whatever.” With these words, Kibum took his bag and walked over to his room, closing the door behind him.

Gyutae's heart was pumping. He was glad that Kibum didn't ask any more questions. He was a pretty bad liar and he was quite sure that Kibum wouldn't have believed his story one bit. Knowing how hard Taemin tried to hide his "second job", he for sure didn't want to be the one to break the news to his Hyung's best friend.

Figuring that Taemin was still sleeping, Gyutae folded the blanket, and bid Kibum who had returned to the small kitchen to drink a glass of water goodbye to avoid any questions he could ask if he were around for much longer. The air outside was cold and Gyutae buried his hands in his jacket, walking around the neighbourhood to find the closest subway station.

While walking, thoughts were crowding his mind. Who was this Minho? Was it the guy he had seen at Erotes that one night? From what he could tell that man had had big eyes, a tall stature and was obviously interested in his Hyung. He really didn't like that guy. The way he talked to his Hyung made his skin crawl and knowing that this Minho seemed to have spent the night at the same apartment he slept in wasn't calming him down the tiniest bit. If he didn't sleep on the couch, and didn't sleep in Kibum's room that must mean he spent the night in Taemin's room. The room where Taemin slept as well.

When Gyutae finally found the subway station, his mind was still working hard on telling it-self that this was none of his business while at the same time a strange feeling spread in his chest. Was it possible that he was jealous?

When Kibum finished doing the dishes and was about to leave for his study session, he heard muffled sounds of two people talking from Taemin’s room and he finally found out where Minho had disappeared to. He had tried calling the taller male several times, but he had been unreachable - this explained a lot.

Kibum had never left the apartment this fast, grabbing his keys and laptop, doing his best to be quiet and not disturb the two men currently in Taemin's stinking room.

Minho stirred awake from the sound of someone doing the dishes, opening his eyes only to see a full head of reddish hair right in front of his nose.

Did he sleep in someone else's bed last night? His memories were shattered, and he couldn’t quite place himself anywhere. He remembered, right when his eyes caught a glimpse on the other person’s face who started to wake up as well.

It only took him seconds to shoot up in the bed, realising that he was caught in between the wall and an awakening Taemin who was looking at him through his messy long hair that covered most of his face.

“Minho?” the sleepy male asked before Minho could somehow escape from the situation. “So I didn’t dream” Taemin mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

“I am sorry, I thought I was in Kibum’s room.” Minho tried to explain but the dancer shushed him.

“Well you thought wrong. This is mine. One would think the smell makes it obvious enough for you to realise. But I guessed it didn’t.” Now Taemin also sat up, his hair still sticking up in all directions. “No, but seriously, dude, how stoned were you? You still stink.”

“Is it that obvious?”

“You asking me that question should be answer enough.”

“Fuck” Minho said, sinking one hand into his dark hair.

“Why do you even care? We have all been there, no judgement here. And a way more important question, who let you into our apartment in the first place for what possible reason?”

Minho closed his eyes for a second before answering: “That is a long story”

“Tell it whenever then. I am going for a smoke, care to join me?” Taemin asked while getting up from the bed, his head hurting pretty badly.

The dancer looked down at Minho who seemed to be undecisive whether or not to take the offer.

“You gonna join me or not?”

“Oh fuck it, as if it matters now anyway.” Minho said, getting up from the bed as well, holding out his hand.

“We gotta go downstairs first, Kibum will kill me if I smoke inside.” Taemin said, and Minho looked at him sceptically.

“Really?” he said, raising an eyebrow – this room smelled as if Taemin didn’t give two shits about the rule Kibum made up.

Taemin rolled his eyes and grabbed the pack of cigarettes which was laying on the floor next to the mattress and walked out of the room. Minho, who definitely didn’t feel like being alone, also got up from the mattress and followed the dancer’s steps out of the apartment.

Outside, Taemin had already lit his cigarette when Minho finally walked through the front door, after taking ages to put on his shoes.

Without a word, the long-haired male held the box of cigarettes towards Minho who took one and put it between his lips, waiting for Taemin to light it with a smirk on his lips. To his surprise, the younger complied, coming closer and lighting up his cigarette with the lighter he had previously taken out of the box of cigarettes.

For the biggest part neither of them spoke a word. They just stood next to each other in the alley, inhaling the thick smoke as if their life depended on it.

“You know? You look like shit.” Taemin commented when he finished, throwing the glowing stub on the floor, stepping on it.

“You know? Mind your own business. I really don’t need more of this today.” Minho shot back, also throwing his finished cigarette on the floor.

“Anything happen last night?”

“I wouldn’t be staying at your apartment if not, would I?”

“If you want to talk, let me know.” Taemin said, and when Minho didn’t react, he added: “You hungry? I’ll make some food.”

“Don’t bother, I should call Jinki to go to his place. Kibum was pretty much my last resort.”

“And here I thought we were on a good way to be friends.” Taemin said, slightly disappointed that Minho described them as a last resort – something he wouldn’t admit even if at gunpoint.

“And here I thought you didn’t want anything to do with me – even less be ‘friends’.”

“Fine, then leave.”

Taemin turned around, opening the door by entering their code, walking upstairs without looking back to see if Minho was following him. If the taller was stupid enough to decline his offer, so be it. He didn’t need him to stay. It wasn’t that he didn’t want him there though. Somehow, it had felt nice to have Minho here – he had felt useful when he was holding Minho in his arms last night, it was as if someone actually needed him.

He was taking out Tupperwares from the refrigerator to heat up some food when the door opened once more, and Minho was taking off his shoes.

With a good feeling in his chest, Taemin put a little more of the Japchae into the pan.

“Smart boy.” He said when Minho joined him in the kitchen.

“Don’t call me boy, I am older than you.”

“Well you don’t act older. So, I don’t have to treat you as if you were – do I?” Taemin said, stirring in three different pans simultaneously.

“You should shut up before I leave this place for real.” Minho said, his pride hurt. As much as he wished to forget, something he remembered about last night was himself crying in Taemin’s arms.

“You make this sound like I want you here.” Taemin said, turning around. To his surprise, Minho was standing right behind him, their faces now only inches apart.

“Hmmm” Minho mumbled, looking into the dancer’s eyes which were almost completely hidden by his long hair. “So then why did you immediately add more food even though I never said I would stay for food?”

“Fuck you” Taemin said, he was so over his act of not being interested in Minho. The truth was, he craved the taller’s body, he craved his touch and the most surprising thing; he craved his presence.

In a blink of an eye, he had closed the gap between their faces, his hands tightly securing Minho’s head by griping into his hair, hard. The kiss was everything but gentle. It started out as Taemin pressing his lips roughly against Minho’s and soon escalated into more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woop woop 
> 
> Next chapter is ready! Leave a comment if you liked it! I love to hear from you - Or if you don't have much to say but still liked it, a Kudos would be great as well!


	20. The Studio has Mirrors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have fun with the new chapter and leave a comment if you have time ><  
> -> At the end of the chapter I left a link to my Masterlist. Come around if you want :)

In a blink of a second, he had closed the gap between their faces, his hands tightly securing Minho’s head by griping into his hair, hard. The kiss was everything but gentle. It started out as Taemin pressing his lips roughly against Minho’s and soon escalated into more. 

The moment Taemin’s lips met his, Minho’s heart started pounding, and his whole body felt like it was on fire. Was it even possible to be affected by a kiss this much? Minho had no idea. The hold in his hair was almost painfully strong but he wouldn’t have it any other way. Everything that happened the past day fell into the background and everything he would think about was Taemin’s lips on his. 

Minho’s back was roughly shoved against the refrigerator, Taemin taking over control of the kiss completely, his hands securing Minho’s body by pressing against his shoulders. Minho, despite his height advantage, felt small while Taemin barely let him breathe. His usual self would not have tolerated anyone to dominate him like this, but with Taemin, he didn’t feel like his usual self. 

Taemin’s hands were moving further down, roaming the taller’s body hungrily until they finally found Minho’s hips, taking them into a tight grip. Minho who suddenly had no self-control whatsoever, moaned into the heated kiss, which Taemin acknowledged with a small chuckle and then used his teeth to take a hold of Minho’s lips, pulling at them gently without hurting the other male. 

By now, Minho’s legs were wobbly, and he had placed his hands on the younger male’s neck and shoulders, sometimes moving his fingers in soft movements, caressing the skin on the back of Taemin’s head. The gesture was small, but it meant a lot to Taemin, who felt his whole body tingle from the sensation of Minho’s fingers touching him in places no one had ever cared to touch before.

It was Taemin who first broke the kiss, not panting as much as Minho, who was breathing heavily, looking at the smaller with a lusty gaze. 

“We should stop” the dancer mumbled, disappointing Minho who wanted nothing more but to rip some clothes apart and forget about all the shit life has thrown at him. 

“You were the one who started it, why?” 

“Because…” Taemin started, pausing because he had no idea why he stopped. Everything went so fast and unlike usually, it didn’t feel good to get right to it. Heck, he didn’t even know why he kissed Minho in the first place. Luckily, before Taemin had to think of some lame excuse, the room started to fill with smoke, a bad, burned smell filling the kitchen. 

“Shit, because the food is burning.” The dancer said, walking over in a panic to try and save what he could, which was not enough. Even with both of them taking pans from the flame and cooling them down immediately, the food was ruined, and two dishes were so badly burned that they weren’t even able to save the pan. 

With a heavy heart, knowing he had to invest in new pans – something he could barely afford – Taemin put the broken pans aside and turned to Minho who was scrubbing another one, desperately trying to save at least that one. 

“Let’s go out.” Taemin said, making Minho stop his mission of saving pan number 3. 

“What did you say?” he answered, turning off the water. 

“I said, let’s eat out. This is bullshit.” 

“Sure. Sounds good. I’ll pay.”

Taemin went back to his room to tie up his hair and put on some halfway decent clothes, also asking Minho if he needed a new shirt- an offer the latter gladly accepted. 

They left soon after, Taemin turning on the washing machine with his working clothes to have them wash while they were gone – their washing machine was almost pre-historical and therefore incredibly loud, so he usually preferred to do it when he wasn’t at home. 

The restaurant they went to was nothing special and their conversation wasn’t either. Taemin was simply checking up on what Minho’s future plans were. The latter had been sending out several text messages to some of his colleagues at university but none of them replied with good news. Now, the taller suddenly regretted not getting involved with them more. 

When it was time to pay, Minho went up to the counter, holding his credit card towards the worker with both hands, and then waited for the payment process to go through. Taemin only watched from afar how the worker was using the magnet stripe several times before giving the card back to a baffled Minho with a shake of her head and a few words Taemin could not make out. 

Shortly after, Minho returned to the table, an apologizing gaze meeting Taemin’s. 

“I think my grandparents are not a big fan of me anymore.”

“Dude I thought you were old enough to be in control of your own finances, especially your credit card?!” Taemin said, slightly confused why Minho’s grandparents still had so much power over the adult male’s life. 

“I don’t know man… I just never found it important to take care of it myself since it always worked out perfectly.”

“Well now not so much, does it? I would advise you to take care of that as soon as possible, you are a grown ass male for god’s sake.” Taemin exclaimed, making Minho blush slightly, humiliated in front of the dancer. “Anyways, for now, I’ll take care of this.” 

Without another word, Taemin got up, taking some bills from the back of his pocket, handing them to the woman at the counter who gladly took the money and handed him their business card. Bowing one last time he turned around, gesturing Minho to follow him outside where he immediately lit up a cigarette waiting for the tall male to come. 

“So where will you stay now?” Taemin asked between two puffs while they were standing in the small alleyway.

“I’ll have to check with Jinki again, maybe he knows a place where I can go. But I’ll need a long-term solution anyway so, like you said, gaining control over my finances should be the top priority.”

“Dude what did you do wrong to anger your grandparents this much?” 

Minho shrugged. “I don’t know… but to be honest, it was a wakeup call. I don’t think I would stay there any longer even if they let me back in today.”

“Let’s get back, maybe we can be of assistance, Kibum should be home soon and he knows a lot of people.” Taemin said, inhaling the last bit of his cigarette before throwing it on the floor. 

Back at the apartment, Kibum already seemed to be back and was welcoming the other two with a loud hello as they entered the place. 

The question about Minho’s temporary stay was answered easier than expected. 

“I mean… we have a couch. I would rather have you here than at Jinki’s – for personal reasons that is. And Taemin is out most of the time anyway so you guys should be able to live alongside each other for the time being? We don’t have any gaming consoles, but I am sure you’ll get along. He would have thrown you out already if he minded you around.” Kibum said while chewing on a piece of cake from Paris Baguette, which had been both, overpriced and overrated. 

Minho was looking at Taemin who didn’t look as sure as his friend. 

“I don’t think that is a good idea, Taemin doesn’t seem comfortable with me staying and I…”

The tall male was interrupted by the dancer: “Stay, but get out as soon as you have your life back under control, and hell, get a grip on your finances boy. I still cannot believe a 23-year-old man does not handle his money by himself. Let me guess, your grandparents also do your taxes?”

“Actually, we have an accountant for that.” Minho mumbled.

“Oh lord. Have you ever done your laundry?” When the taller did not answer immediately, Taemin took it upon himself to assume he hadn’t. “Let’s make a deal, you help with the housework and you can stay until you found a permanent place.” 

Every part of him resisted admitting that he wanted Minho around. But in the end, he lost. If it was the curiosity to see if Minho could do laundry, if it was the fact that he wanted to embarrass the taller if he couldn’t, or if he just wanted to spend time with Minho – it didn’t matter. He allowed him to stay.

“Sounds fair to me.” Minho said, believing he could do a good job. 

“Follow me then.”

The two of them took out the laundry Taemin had put in the machine earlier and the dancer made Minho carry it up to the rooftop. Weather was great so it would dry faster up there in the sun. 

“This is where you hang it.” Taemin said, showing him where everything was. 

The clothes in the basket were strange, Minho thought. While hanging them, he had a hard time identifying many of the pieces. Most were tiny, only few of them actually consisting from a decent amount of fabric and Minho guessed that this was Taemin’s work clothes when he recognised the see-through shirt Taemin had worn the first time he met him. 

It was strange holding all these pieces in his hands, especially the ones that looked more like a tiny brief combined with a thong. Minho wondered how those were worn. Minho suddenly wanted to see Taemin wear it. Minho desired to see Taemin wearing nothing but it. 

“Stop staring at my underwear before I change my mind about you staying, it’s creepy.”

“O shit, sorry.” Minho said, immediately taking his eyes off it, hanging it right next to all the others. 

Taemin had been watching Minho for a while, the latter seemed pretty interested especially in his underwear. Not that he was surprised – Minho had turned out to be quite the pervert when it came to anything that was only slightly connected to him. Normally it disgusted him when guys looked at him with want – not to speak about them creepily staring at his underwear or even stealing it – But the longer he watched Minho handling his underwear, the more he started to like the sight of his tiny briefs in his hand. 

The dancer also knew, that somewhere in there, there was a jockstrap which he usually used for his performances in the evening. If he was honest, he couldn’t wait to see Minho’s reaction to that one – and he didn’t have to wait long. 

“I wasn’t planning to make any comments, but how the hell to you wear this one?!? There is nothing there?” Minho said, holding up the jockstrap which wasn’t more than a few stings which were attached to a sock-like piece of fabric. 

“Strings around the waist, penis and balls in socket. It is not very complicated.” Taemin chuckled, joining Minho hanging the rest of his working clothes.

They didn’t speak much and a comfortable silence spread over them as they enjoyed the warm sun on their bodies.

“I should be going now - Actually I should have left a while ago. So, I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” Taemin said after they were back in the apartment. 

“Can you fold the laundry when it is dark? I don’t know when I’ll come home tonight, and I’ll prefer them not being up there for so long. There are a lot of creeps, you know?” The long-haired male laughed a little as he was walking over to his room, leaving Minho in the entrance by himself. 

Shortly after, Minho had just taken his place on the couch, Taemin came out of his room, clothes changed completely, from the casual ones he was wearing before to really tight, like seriously, incredibly tight leather pants and a crop top with a jeans jacket on top. 

“Also, remember, you sleep on the couch. My bed is not your couch.” Taemin said walking over to the door, passing Minho on the way. The latter didn’t manage to answer, his gaze was completely fixed on Taemin’s prominent bulge.

“Okay?” Taemin tried again, turning around.

“Yes, I understand.”

The club was already busy when Taemin arrived, the barkeepers were cleaning up and preparing everything for the first customers who should come around 7pm and Jonghyun was to be seen supervising a few workers installing new lights for the stage. 

“Yo! Tae” the muscular male shouted when he set eyes on the freshly arrived dancer who was fixing his messy hair in front of one of the many mirrors. 

Taemin then turned around to face the handsome male who owned the club.

“Sejin will be late today, so I scheduled your dance an hour earlier. That way he can still make it. Also, I looked over the footage you sent me for the new duo. I have a few things I would like to discuss.” Jonghyun said, professional as always. 

“Sure thing Jjong, should we meet tomorrow to get those parts fixed?” The dancer said, glad that his boss liked what he came up with.

“Oh, and bring your partner, I’ll need a duo recording of this before bringing it to the stage.”

Taemin’s smile disappeared. “How did you know I had a partner to train?”

“You know, the studio has mirrors as walls, right? He came into the frame a few times, and also I know that you take your work too seriously to choreograph a duo performance all by yourself.” With these words, Jonghyun left, focusing his attention back on the workers fixing the spotlights.

“Fuck” Taemin mumbled. There was no way in the world that Minho would agree to join him for another dance, even less if Jonghyun was watching and it was recorded. Memories of that day flooded his mind. There was one thing he was sure of, doing it with Minho was not an option. In his panic, he messaged Gyutae to meet him in front of the club just after his performance was scheduled to finish. 

Everything that evening passed in a blink, the styling, the performance and even the collecting of tips. He didn’t even change after the performance but rushed outside to meet up with Gyutae, who was already happily waiting, talking to a few men on the street. 

“Come with me” Taemin said when he reached them, not giving the younger the possibility to say goodbye to the people he had been talking to - not that he knew them anyway. The men whistled and shouted after them – the fact that the dancer was in full make-up and half naked only provoked more slippery comments. So Taemin did what he could to get back inside as fast as possible, pulling Gyutae after him. 

They shortly made it to the tiny courtyard that was surrounded by ugly concrete walls. With fascination, the younger watched as, in this small space, a handful of dancers on their break were smoking together, looking up for a second to salute to Taemin who barely acknowledged them. Before Gyutae knew, they were already descending narrow stairs only to be standing in a dance studio, a large one at that. 

“Yo, Hyung, what did you bring me here for?” Gyutae said as soon as the door behind them was closed.

“I need you to learn a choreography for tomorrow.” Taemin said, knowing himself how insane that sounded.

“I need to what? Hyung…”

“Gyutae, I am so sorry for bringing all of this crap onto you. But I need a partner for this choreo I made, and Jonghyun wants to record it tomorrow”

“And you couldn’t have told me sooner? You know, I was supposed to work tonight.” The younger said, looking at the dancer a little annoyed. 

“I’ll pay you, just help me out.”

“Fine, what do you need me to do?”

In the shortest time, Taemin gathered everything they needed, also giving Gyutae some clothes to change into. He himself didn’t feel the need to get out of his performance clothes, he could move well in them after all. 

Just a few minutes into their rehearsal, the dancer could already see that Gyutae wasn’t completely untalented – much to his relief, he had prepared himself for an all-nighter. 

It was so much different from when he did the choreo with Minho. Less awkward but also less sensual, the eye contact was natural and in contrast to Minho, the younger was actually able to keep the eye contact up without looking away after just a few seconds. Was it because they had worked together, sleeping with clients? Was it because they didn’t have to be ashamed in front of each other for anything because they had seen each other in their worst states? Taemin wasn’t sure.

Gyutae turned out to be a quick learner, following Taemin’s instructions easily. They managed to get through most of the choreo before 2am when the dancer decided that they should call it a night. 

“Can you drive me to Erotes?” Gyutae asked, earning a mad look from Taemin. 

“No way you work tonight, I said you were going to get payed, and as a matter of fact I know your contract with Erotes and that you do not have bookings made in advance for now unless it is with me. So, save me the talk. I'll drive you home.”

“Never mind then, Mr. Know-it-all. Do you have a shower here? I stink and the showers at the Goshiwon suck ass.” Gyutae said and shrugged his shoulders. He wouldn’t complain not having to work but instead getting to shower in a place that wasn’t a toilet at the same time.

“I could use a shower as well. It’s right over there, follow me!” Taemin said, walking over to the showers. 

It was only a small room but there were several showerheads and a door the dancer locked after they entered. You never know what kind of people would walk into this place at this hour. Even if it was in the backstage area of the club, there were frequently men that found their way there after their lap-dances. 

Gyutae felt nervous for the first time that night. He hadn’t expected Taemin to join him for the shower. In all honesty, he had been slightly aroused for a while and had wanted to jerk off before driving home. The vibrations of the motorcycle would surely not leave him dormant in this state, and something he didn’t want was his hard-on pressing against Taemin’s backside while they were driving. 

And now it was only the two of them in a completely closed-off room, the gorgeous dancer already getting the little amount of fabric, that had been covering his skin, off. Hesitantly, Gyutae followed Taemin’s lead, removing his clothes before turning on the shower, paying close attention to not turn around and face the dancer. The younger knew that his Hyung would instantly know what’s up when he saw his penis. The latter had had more encounters with male genitalia than he and would surely notice.

A few minutes into showering, their bodies were already completely soaked, Taemin asked for the soap which was placed right next to where Gyutae was standing, his back to Taemin, doing his best to hide his growing erection from the gorgeous dancer.

“Are you alright?” Taemin asked, when Gyutae handed him the soap without turning around. His arm was bent backwards unnaturally while he tried his best not to look suspicious. 

“Yes sure.” Gyutae said, still holding the soap in his hand, wiggling it to gesture Taemin to finally take it. The latter did not and just moved closer, inspecting the younger closely. 

“Are you seriously trying to hide your hard-on from me?” the dancer said, chuckling slightly. “I thought there was nothing to be ashamed of between us. Guess you still worry about stuff like that. It’s alright to get aroused from the dances, actually it means I have done a good job.”

“But you are my Hyung… It’s strange.” Gyutae said, covering his pulsing penis with his hands and turned around.

“I have been hard for many performances, don’t worry about it. I am taking this as a compliment.” Taemin smirked, getting even closer. 

Gyutae could barely breathe. Taemin looked absolutely stunning. Even though he had seen him naked many times, seeing his body and his tattoos was always an experience. Now, the water and foggy air even added to it, his skin glistening in the ugly light of the showers. His long hair was wet and stuck to his shoulders and face in the most erotic way possible. 

“Let me help you with that.” Those were the only words Gyutae heard before his hands were replaced by Taemin’s. 

Gyutae knew how Taemin’s hands felt on his shaft. It had happened before. He couldn’t even blame curiosity. He could only feel himself giving in right that moment, enjoying every single second of it. 

Taemin gently stroked Gyutae’s cock, changing pace from time to time, turning his hand when he felt the need. He didn’t get involved in it much. It was just a casual handjob to release the pressure from the younger’s balls, for convenience, no feelings involved.

It wasn't long until the dancer knew that Gyutae was nearing his orgasm – it was pretty obvious as the latter was now holding himself up with both hands against the wall, his head thrown back and eyes closed. His whole body was trembling and from time to time he couldn’t help but irregularly move his hips to meet with Taemin’s hands more. 

Taemin, who enjoyed watching Gyutae’s reaction to his touch, sped up the tempo drastically, pumping him with all his might which resulted in a really loud moan, a few more thrusts and then muscle contractions while white seeds splattered onto the white wall. The dancer didn’t remove his hand instantly after he came, massaging the hot organ a few more moments until Gyutae’s breath was calming down. 

He let go of the younger’s penis when it was getting softer, washing his hands under the water that still came from the shower head above them. 

“I’ll leave that for you to clean.” Taemin said, watching a completely spent Gyutae washing his own cum off the wall. The dancer went back to washing his hair and removing most of the make-up from his face, noticing from aside that the younger did the same. 

What Taemin didn't know was that Gyutae's heart was beating a little too hard for the fact that this handjob was supposed to be casual. They did not speak much until both of them were completely done showering. Taemin put on some of his trainers as he had left his street clothes back inside the club’s changing room. After everything was put back to its original state, it was almost 3am when the two exited the dance studio, closing the door behind them.

“I need a drink” Gyutae said right before they entered the backstage area of the club again. Loud music and cheering filled their ears when they walked through the dimly lit corridors to the main room. 

“Sure, let’s try and get a spot at the bar.” Taemin answered, if he was honest, he himself would like something to drink – one wouldn’t hurt. 

It wasn’t long after they had taken a seat and Taemin ordered a drink for the two of them with Dongyoon, his favourite barkeeper, before the dancer got recognised. Even though he wasn’t wearing any make-up nor fancy clothes, his hair was pretty much a giveaway and at some point, it got too much. 

Men were gathering around them and it was time for them to leave. They left the bar, glasses still half-full, with whistles from a few men who tried to touch Taemin more than once. Not that he minded much - if wasn't the first time he went for a drink at the bar after work, but today he didn't like the attention the men were giving him. One of the security guys, Taemin didn't even remember his name, came to his rescue, accompanying the two outside. 

"I almost didn't recognize you Taemin, say something next time." The security guard said with a shy smile, bowing to the dancer and going back inside. What a strange man. 

“I’ll drive you home.” Taemin said when they were standing next to his motorcycle, smiling at the younger who stared right back into his eyes. 

“Can I kiss you?”

_A/N  
I do have a **Masterlist** with all my stories if you want to check out more of what I have written: [CLICK HERE](https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1431224/aimrwv-masterlist-2-0) to get to the list. It also holds links to story-art (both PG and NSFW) as well as story posters and translations.   
In addition for everyone who can't wait for the updates: You'll find the link to the up-to-date version of Past Midnight with a few more additional chapters. If you come around meet me in the comments there hehehe I would love to talk to y'all a little...  
_


	21. Blame his Curiosity

“I’ll drive you home.” Taemin said when they were standing next to his motorcycle, smiling at the younger who stared right back into his eyes. 

“Can I kiss you?”

There was a short moment of silence between them before a few drunk people from the side of the club shouted at the two of them. 

“Let’s go.” Taemin said, ignoring Gyutae’s question – at least for now. 

With a hurt look on his face, the younger took the helmet from Taemin’s hand when the latter held it towards him. It was awkward to interrupt the moment like this but neither of them felt like interacting with a bunch of drunk men. 

The ride to Gyutae’s Goshiwon was silent and tense. After the younger’s question, his arms felt different around Taemin’s waist. While the city was passing by them, Taemin thought about possible reasons why Gyutae would want to kiss him – all of which involved romantic feelings, something Taemin was trying to stay away from as well as he could. 

He knew he would need to talk to the younger as soon as they arrived, even more because they were supposed to dance together tomorrow. This awkward air around them would make it impossible to properly get the feeling across. But he dreaded the moment of their arrival, nevertheless, hoping he wouldn’t lose Gyutae over something like this. 

“Why did you want to kiss me earlier?” Taemin asked as soon as Gyutae gave him his helmet. 

“I don’t know…” the younger said, looking at the floor while biting his lip. It was obvious that he knew exactly.

“You shouldn’t like me that way.” The dancer said bluntly. There was no use in beating around the bush – it was getting late.

Gyutae who seemed a little unsure because of Taemin’s directness, looked at the older and spoke with a small voice: “Is it because of that Minho guy?”

“He has nothing to do with this.”

“I know he stayed in your room last night. I mean I can’t blame him… You are devilishly handsome and amazing at the same time; I can’t blame him for falling for you.”

“You are getting this all wrong.” Taemin intervened but the smaller kept talking.

“He also came by the club, I was too afraid to ask but it is pretty obvious that you are together, so it was stupid for me to even ask for that kiss. The whole night just fried my brains – also the handjob was really unnecessary as it seemed to have more meaning for me than it did for you.”

“Gyutae.”

“I am just so sick of being used and tossed away, and you were the one to pick me up and show me that there is a strength in me I never knew of... Fuck and now I ruined everything” Gyutae wasn’t responding to Taemin calling his name and kicked a few stones that were lying on the floor

“Gyutae”

“Can you pretend you never heard it? Of course you cannot, that would be stupid after all. Why do I always ruin the good things that happen to me?”

“YA Gyutae!” Now as Taemin raised his voice in the silent alley, the younger finally reacted. “Stop it. You seem to know what my answer to your question will be, I am sorry I cannot give you what you ask for – you deserve someone amazing and it can’t be me. But you are wrong about pretty much everything else: You didn’t “ruin” us. I won’t leave you for such a stupid reason, you are not the first person to confess to me that I stayed friends with.”

“I didn’t confess” Gyutae mumbled 

“Anyways, also, whatever there is between Minho and me, I really don’t want to give in.”

“How do you mean that?” the smaller said, not quite following what Taemin was saying.

“I am saying I am doing my best to not fall for him. I really am not in a state of my life where I would need someone by my side that expects something from me. Doesn’t matter if it is him or you.” The long-haired male said, scratching his neck, deciding it would be time for him to leave. “I should go. Tomorrow will be another long day. Can you be at the club around 2pm? So we can have a short rehearsal before Jjong joins us.”

“This still stands?”

“Boy, I won’t abandon you – hence, if you are comfortable enough, I would love to have you there tomorrow. You are good and I bet, Jjong will be happy to sign you – if you want to, of course.”

“I will be there.” Gyutae said, his voice still soft, and then turned around without another word, entering the Goshiwon. Taemin could not see the small tears that escaped his eyes after the door closed. It wasn’t like he had expected anything, but a rejection was still a rejection. 

Taemin arrived at their apartment complex not long after, and before going to their apartment he went to the rooftop to check if Minho took in the laundry. It was nice to see that the taller had actually followed his request, that way, he didn’t have to do it now but could smoke a cigarette instead. The night was wonderful and if he concentrated, he could even make out a few stars in the sky that was mostly lit up by the city. While he was puffing the smoke into the cold night air he was thinking about many things, Minho and Gyutae included.

Downstairs, he tried to be as quiet as he always was when he came back home late. But today it was not because of Kibum, but because of Minho who was sleeping on the couch. To Taemin’s disadvantage, he had to pass by the sleeping Minho to reach his room. 

He knew it had been a mistake to look at the sleeping male in the dim light of the light in the entrance as soon as he set his eyes on the peaceful face. He knew it was a mistake to get closer, getting on his knees, he knew it was a mistake to watch the older sleep. But he did it anyway. 

Minho’s facial features were absolutely stunning. Now, more than they ever were before. Taemin’s face was close, way too close if Minho had been awake, but telling himself that the other would never know about this, the dancer studied every inch of the tall male’s face. 

His lashes were longer than he had anticipated, and the skin slightly more damaged than what he usually registered. Taemin’s eyes rested on one spot for a long time, Minho’s lips and the adorable lack of a cupids bow. It took all his will power not to touch the soft lips he only barely remembered the feeling of when they were pressed against his own. Taemin wasn’t very good at remembering anything physical in his mind, everything just mixed together and gave this nasty mess that was constantly in the back of his mind. He wished he could recall the feeling he experienced when kissing Minho. He hated himself for being unable to. 

He was brought back to reality after minutes of him staring at the sleeping figure, when the automatic light of the entrance turned off. 

“Shit.” Taemin mumbled and got up from his knees. “You are in really deep shit. Lee Taemin”

Lying in his bed, he was unable to sleep. His lower region wouldn’t let him. Whenever he closed his eyes, trying to sleep, somehow, Minho’s body would pop up in his mind. Most times he saw Minho underneath him on the cold floor of the dance studio. Sometimes it was Minho’s face while he was deepthroating him, and, rarely, also the image of Minho ramming his beautiful dick inside of him when the taller had unofficially booked him.

Minho’s untouched hole had been so freaking tight. Even though he could not spend much time enjoying the sensation, he wished nothing more than to go back to that moment. He wanted Minho to moan beneath his touch, begging him to fuck him – hard. 

Before he knew it, he was completely erect. His mind was cloudy while he stood up from his bed, penis dangling against the soft fabric of his boxers, and walked over to where he had hidden the memory card. 

He shouldn’t be doing this with Minho in the next room, but he was done waiting to watch the video – also, the other was deeply asleep and wouldn’t wake up anytime soon. On his tiptoes, he went over to Kibum’s room to steal the latter’s laptop as he did not own one himself. While Kibum was breathing regularly, fast asleep, Taemin took the device and left the room just as silently as he had entered it. 

With a pumping heart and a pumping dick, he sat down on his matrass, leaning against the cold wall and turned on the laptop. 

The volume almost turned down completely, he pressed play and watched as the two of them were dancing. 

Fast forward.

They are kissing on the floor. 

Fast forward.

“Fuck, your body is so nice” Taemin heard his own voice through the speakers, the ripped fabric of Minho’s shirt still in his hands. Completely agreeing with his statement back then, he used his left hand to palm his erection through the fabric of his boxers while he used his right to fast forward once more. 

Minho was now standing there completely naked, after his underwear was almost obsessively pulled down by Taemin who was visibly enjoying the sight before taking off his own clothes. 

Taemin watched himself getting naked and even though he hated to see himself on video, especially when naked, somehow in combination with Minho’s built body, he looked hot. His fingers were gently tapping the tip of his dick – he loved to take his time when he had the rare occasion to pleasure himself freely. He was a man and had his needs, but usually he tried to keep it as short as possible, getting the semen out of his balls and going on with his life. But tonight, he was taking his sweet time while he watched himself complimenting Minho on his body for almost a minute. 

His fingers passed the hem of his boxers, running through his pubic hair, while he watched how Minho looked at his body with a wanting look in his eyes. The same way he didn’t care that much when Minho stared at his underwear, he didn’t remember feeling grossed out for even a second. Usually if he saw men with this look in their eyes when they watched him, he felt uneasy, almost disgusted - mostly at himself. A short almost silent moan escaped his lips, when he finally allowed himself to touch his shaft, pressing against the soft skin gently, while his picture was almost hugging Minho from behind, while whispering something in his ear that instantly made the taller blush. 

They looked good together – Taemin stroked his cock harder – Taemin on the screen pulled Minho to his lips, instantly deepening their kiss, both their heads turned to the max as the dancer was still hugging the other from behind. – Taemin’s eyelids got heavier and through clouded eyes he saw them turning around, the kiss becoming more intense while he was first to press his hips forward to meet Minho’s privates with his own.

His grip on his penis got stronger while his image on the screen held Minho’s hands tightly, not allowing the taller male to touch his body. Looking back on the footage like this he regretted not letting the taller’s hands roam his skin. Imagining how amazing the latter’s rough hands would feel on his heated body, he kept pumping his dick, spreading the precum that was oozing out of his tip with his fingers. 

Taemin immediately skipped forwards when their images parted, talking about whatever, watching how he stroked Minho’s dick while the taller did his best to keep his hands to himself. 

“Did I tell you already that you have the prettiest dick?” Taemin couldn’t agree with his statement more while he watched Minho’s red dick jerking from the previous slap he had given it. Minho’s facial expressions were priceless and Taemin felt his orgasm nearing.

He didn’t want to cum, he wanted this to go on for much longer. With all his willpower, he removed his hand from his pulsing member, his hips jerking in the air once or twice at the sudden loss of touch. 

Taemin saw himself leaving the frame to get lube. What followed were the most arousing 50 seconds he had ever seen. Minho stood there, alone in the studio, looking at his own erect penis, still seemingly unsure about whether or not he liked the rough treatment. He flicked his fingers against the hot skin, back bending forward whenever he hit the sensitive organ, still deciding whether or not he liked it.

Lying in his bed, Taemin couldn’t tear his eyes from the screen as he saw Minho’s body reacting in pleasure and pain while the tall male was pumping his manhood in between soft hits. 

Fuck, he had no idea that Minho had done this while he was gone. From his reaction afterwards, he had guessed that his actions had been discomforting for the taller, covering his unsureness with confidence, trying to make Minho believe he had actually liked the sensation, that Taemin hadn't been wrong to do it. Taemin’s penis twitched at the thought, oozing some more precum that formed a pretty drop on his crown. 

Dipping his fingers in the wetness of it, Taemin watched himself coming back, preparing Minho for what was to come. Seeing Minho on the floor, offering his ass to him, broke his will to keep going for a long time. His hand which had just been slightly caressing the soft skin of his member was now closed around it tightly, applying pressure to all the right spots while his other hand was fast forwarding the part when the studio was empty due to them cleaning Minho’s ass in the showers. 

He felt his orgasm coming once more, his back arched and breathing heavy while his image on the screen was preparing Minho’s virgin asshole. 

“oh fuck” a throaty moan escaped his lips. The sounds Minho made were so much more intense now that he was able to listen to it while getting the full visual. He had been so concentrated on preparing him properly that he didn’t notice how Minho was releasing grunts and other more moan-like sounds from his throat while his fingers were going in and out of his ass. 

Minho’s face was distorted in pain and pleasure which was the thing that sent Taemin over the edge. While his hips were jerking erratically into his fist and his whole body tensed up – back arching to its highest point-, his balls were contracting, shooting his seeds out of the red cock. The cum landed mostly on his lower torso, some of it getting caught in the little pubic hair he still had and a little spilling on the screen of the laptop when he bent the hard organ a little too much while riding out his orgasm. 

It had been ages since an orgasm hit him like this one – his whole body was shuddering while he kept pumping his penis lazily, enjoying the last moments of his orgasm with his eyes closed while the video kept playing. 

He was too tired to clean himself. He was too tired to get up. His eyes didn’t open again as he drifted off to sleep.

“YAH LEE TAEMIN” 

Taemin heard Kibum shout, but before he woke up properly, Kibum furiously entered his room. 

“DID YOU TAKE MY…” there was a short break when Kibum saw the state Taemin was in. “FUCKING ASSHOLE!”

“Kim?” Taemin uttered, rubbing his eyes. He felt like he hadn’t slept anything more than 3 hours…

“There is fucking cum on my laptop. Get your dick out of my sight. NOW.” Kibum said while Taemin sat up sleepily, quickly tucking his flaccid penis into his boxers. 

“I… Sorry…”

“No, not sorry. Clean it. Now. My lecture starts in less than an hour so you better…” 

“Yes, got it. On my way.” Taemin interrupted, taking out the memory card and getting up from his bed only to see both Kibum AND Minho. The latter was standing in the door frame, kind of lost and on the verge of leaving while Kibum looked less uncomfortable than angry. 

Taemin felt like shit as he stood up, his whole body sore from all the rehearsing last night. And the dried cum didn’t make him feel any better. His hair looked like a mess, deep eyebags under his eyes that glanced to the alarm clock which showed 7:30. Fuck. Today was going to be a long day. 

Minho hadn’t thought much when he followed Kibum to Taemin’s room. Blame his curiosity. What he didn’t expect was seeing a half-naked Taemin struggling to wake up, dick bare, small stains of cum visible not only on his skin but also on a laptop which he guessed was Kibum’s. He saw Taemin tucking his penis back into his boxers, he didn't even try to look away. 

Their eyes met after Taemin got up from his bed with visibly heavy limbs, and Minho knew it was time for him to leave. Even though Taemin didn’t seem to be uncomfortable being seen in this state, for him it was awkward, nevertheless.

The dancer came out of his room shortly, looking absolutely destroyed and Minho wondered when the other had come back home last night. 

The laundry, he had put neatly folded next to the door to Taemin’s room and he noticed that it had not been moved yet. Later, all he got from the younger was a short thank you after the latter had cleaned the laptop and Kibum left the apartment. 

Minho called the bank and minded his own business while Taemin seemed to busy himself in the kitchen first, making breakfast for himself and in the bathroom afterwards. 

They did not talk at all, but Minho decided it would be a nice idea to sit with Taemin as the younger ate. He didn’t complain about Minho’s presence, so he guessed that Taemin didn’t mind.

Shortly before noon, Taemin, his face now covered in makeup, making him look less like a zombie, gave him a few instructions on what should be done in the apartment before leaving. 

“I’ll be late again, and I think Kibum will stay at Jinki’s for tonight, so just don’t burn the house down.”

“Ayy sir.” Minho said, with a fake smile on his face, hoping that it could get a small smile on Taemin’s lips as well. The latter seemed too tired to smile though, just sending a sceptical look towards him before leaving with a mumbled “Bye”

Taemin was early. He didn’t want to stay at the apartment for much longer. He could barely look at Minho. He would be stupid not to realise how fast he was falling for the taller male, but he would be even dumber if he actually gave in to those feelings. Which was why he needed to get away. 

Being early gave him the chance to look over the choreo a few more times, watching his tired body move slightly slower and less gracefully than usually. 

“Hyung?” He heard Gyutae’s voice. 

As he turned around, he saw Gyutae entering the studio, instantly wondering how the younger was able to get inside without him opening the door to the club for him. His unasked question got answered when he saw Jonghyun entering behind his protegee. 

“You were supposed to get me at 2. So yeah, I met Jonghyun-Hyung here and he told me he could get me inside.” Gyutae said, smiling at the owner of the club which was about the same height as him.

“Thanks for bringing me Hyung! I think we are good now.” 

“Jonghyun-Hyung?” Taemin said, a smirk on his lips. “I think your Jonghyun-Hyung would rather stay as he is why we are here.” 

“You are ruining the fun Lee.” Jonghyun said, ruffling Gyutae’s hair. “Where did you find him? He is adorable” 

“He is not adorable, and I would appreciate you getting your hands off him.” Taemin said, feeling uncomfortable seeing his boss treating Gyutae like this. 

“I don’t mind.” Gyutae said. “But I am still confused.”

“That’s the owner of this club Gyutae-ya. Kim Jonghyun. He is the one who wanted to see the new choreography that we rehearsed.” Taemin said and Gyutae’s eyes widened. 

“Oh! Sajangnim* I am so sorry.” He spoke, apologizing for the lack of honorifics he used before while bowing 90 degrees. 

“Don’t worry about it, I prefer you calling me Jonghyun-Hyung.” The muscular male said with a warm smile on his lips.

_A/N_

_*Sajangnim is a term Koreans use for the CEO/Boss of an institution - they also don't combine it with names, just use it as such.  
  
_

_Also, I have made a Twitter because someone asked for it! So if you want to come around, get some insights in the story writing process or just simply to talk to me:[TWITTER](https://twitter.com/aimrwv)_

_Have a great day and I'll hopefully see you soon!_

_xx_

_R_


	22. I'll Leave First

The rehearsal went by in a blink. Gyutae was enjoying himself a little more than Taemin had expected. Even though not all the moves were perfect, his overall performance was outstanding for someone who hadn’t been dancing much before.

It wasn’t only Gyutae who found joy in the performance, Jonghyun who was sitting there, closely observing the pair dancing in the spacious room also had a great time. Of course, in comparison to Taemin’s insane body control, Gyutae’s paled, but when he isolated the young male’s performance from Taemin’s, he saw a really talented boy. The owner of the club couldn’t help but follow his moves closely, knowing that he would do all in his power to give this boy a place on his stage.

The longer Jonghyun watched Gyutae move, the more he was fascinated by the younger. Yes, Taemin was beautiful when dancing, but the new boy was pulling him in even more. His movements were a little childish, a little uncoordinated, but full of life, full of energy and it looked beautiful. Before he knew it, the song was over and both Gyutae and Taemin waited for him to speak up.

“Can you get this polished in two months?”

The two breathless dancers were looking at Jonghyun, confusion especially on Taemin’s face.

“I have a few things here and there you have to work on. Also we have to think about costumes and lighting. I want this at the big party for the club’s 5th anniversary.”

Taemin looked surprised while Gyutae wasn’t quite following.

“But doesn’t the program already stand?” the dancer asked, finally catching his breath.

“Yeah, but there is room for this. Taemin meet me tomorrow to discuss the changes I want you to do, Gyutae follow me to my office, if you want to start here, I’ll need you to sign a few papers.”

Now it wasn’t only Taemin’s face that visibly showed surprise. Gyutae barely knew how to control his expressions and was staring at the oldest male with wide eyes.

“Sajangnim, what do you mean I have to sign papers?!” he said with a shaky voice.

“I told you to call me Hyung, didn’t I? Do you want the job or not?” Jonghyun said with a smirk, enjoying the younger’s adorable reaction.

“I… I would really like that.”

“Jjong, he is 17.” Taemin interrupted them.

Jonghyun mustered Gyutae with sceptical eyes. “Seventeen?” for a second he massaged his temples while mumbling “dammit.”

“That’s young.” The small male said “Tae, why did you bring him here? This is no place for a minor to be.”

“A brothel isn’t either.” Taemin said in all honesty, receiving a begging look from Gyutae. The teenager didn’t want him to know. He didn’t want Jonghyun to know where he worked. For once, he wanted to just be himself. Jonghyun had treated him so well since the first second they met. Now he would be different. Disappointed? Disgusted? A bit of both?

“What did you say?” Jonghyun said, anger filling the room. Everyone could feel it. Jonghyun was fuming. “Repeat what you just said.”

“I said a brothel isn’t the place for a teenager to be either.” Taemin repeated and Gyutae grabbed his hand to keep his hyung from speaking.

“It’s not like th-“ Gyutae tried to defend himself but Jonghyun’s hard voice interrupted him.

“I fucking hate them. How can they.” He growled and then his expression softened when he looked at Gyutae.

“I won’t let you go back there. Is it the place you were at?” he asked Taemin who nodded.

Jonghyun was thinking for a while before he continued.

“Gyutae, you’ll need to come with me upstairs for a while. It’s not a pleasant progress but it worked once before.” He threw a small look in Taemin’s direction who squeezed Gyutae’s hand to tell him it will work out well.

“This turned out a little different than I imagined. In any way, Taemin, tonight I want the rose-project on stage again and I would like you to get the dancers together to rehearse it again a few times before the performance. Last week was an embarrassment. We are charging our customers too much to give them mediocre performances.”

“Will do.” Taemin said, secretly groaning that he had to put up with too many new dancers that only half-heartedly involved themselves.

With a short nod, Jonghyun got up, gestured for Gyutae to follow him just before opening the door and exiting the room.

Surprisingly enough, Taemin’s performance that night was moved to the very beginning of the evening. He found out why fast, when Jonghyun told him to take Gyutae home in time. Even though Gyutae said several times that he could go back home by himself, Jonghyun wouldn’t let him. He himself couldn’t leave the club unattended but choosing the next best option, Taemin was told to bring him back to the Goshiwon.

The dancer didn’t complain of course – he was incredibly tired and as much as he dreaded to meet both Kibum and Minho when he came home, he couldn’t wait to close his eyes and drift off to sleep.

Right after his performance, he took off most of his make-up, met Gyutae who was waiting backstage, and they left the club in a hurry. The younger was asking about how Jonghyun had gotten Taemin out of Erotes when they were waiting at red lights, other than that there was barely any conversation.

Taemin didn’t like talking about his past much, but he knew that, since he would have to go through everything in the near future, it would be good to know.

He bid Gyutae good night and left after seeing him getting into the building. By Jonghyun’s command, he had to make sure the younger was safe home.

When he was arriving at their apartment complex, he was stunned, was he really able to go to sleep before midnight? He still couldn’t quite believe it. This kind of luxury has been unfamiliar to him for years.

Minho was sitting at the small kitchen table, eating a bowl of instant Ramyeon when he heard the door open. It couldn’t be Kibum – the latter had returned about an hour ago and hadn’t left his room ever since –it had to be Taemin returning from work. Ever since Taemin rushed out this morning, he couldn’t get this image of the broken dancer out of his head. He knew that the younger wasn’t doing too well, but seeing him up-close in a state like that, visualised what he had known in a disturbing way.

Was it going to be awkward meeting him now? It turned out to not be an issue at all as Taemin walked right past him – straight to the bathroom, only to disappear barely five minutes later into his room without a single word. After debating with himself over his bowl of instant noodles, he decided he should check up on Taemin. Minho didn’t care that the younger obviously was in no mood to talk and knocked on his door without another thought.

“What do you want” Taemin said from the inside.

“I… I just wanted to check on you. Did you eat dinner yet?”

Minho heard steps on the other side right before the door was opened and he was standing face to face with the dancer who looked more alive than he expected him to.

“Why do you care?” Taemin lifted an eyebrow

“Do I really need to explain myself again? You are awfully stubborn.”

“Please focus on your own problems, alright? Get your life under control before you stick your nose into mine.” Taemin had almost closed the door when Minho’s hands got a hold of it.

“I did. I took care of a lot of shit today, and I know for a fact you haven’t eaten, so you better get your ass over here.” Minho said, turning around to walk towards the kitchen only to be held back by Taemin’s hand gripping on his wrist.

“Don’t talk to me like that. I can throw you out on the street anytime.” Taemin threatened.

“You don’t listen if I talk to you nicely, so why should I? I tried for long enough.” Minho shrugged and pulled his wrist out of Taemin’s tight grip.

“Do you expect me to follow you just because you want me to? Thanks, but no, I have that enough in my daily life. I am old enough to take care of myself.”

“DUDE.” Minho spoke louder this time, “I am just asking you to eat dinner, I don’t want to fuck you for god’s sake.”

Taemin’s eyes widened for a second while Minho realised what he just said.

“I am sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Just stop treating me like a customer, I am not.” He said, voice softer now to make sure Kibum wouldn’t hear the conversation.

When the long-haired male didn’t reply, Minho took his hand, pulling him towards the kitchen and to his surprise he barely met resistance. Taemin let himself be dragged across the room and seemed to be lost in his thoughts, probably processing what the taller had said.

They didn’t speak while Minho was warming up a few things to serve the dancer who was staring at the table.

“Here, eat.” Minho said, placing two plates filled with a little meat and soup in front of the younger. The latter grabbed the spoon and chopsticks but before he took a bite, he looked over to where Minho was still standing.

“I know that.” He said so softly that the taller only barely made out the words.

“Know what?” the latter questioned, not quite following what Taemin was talking about.

“You not being a customer, I mean.”

“Good.” Minho answered, hoping for Taemin to keep talking. To his disappointment, the younger started eating and even though he joined him at the table, the dancer didn’t say anything after those few words.

When Taemin finished – he was obviously hungry – Minho expected him to get up and leave. But the dancer stayed seated.

“Are you still hungry?”

“I’ll go for a smoke. Care to join?” For the first time that night, they made eye contact, and Minho just nodded.

“I don’t have any ciga-“ Minho started, but was interrupted.

“I have plenty.”

Taemin got up slowly, putting the dishes away before going to his room only to come back out after a few seconds, in his hand: a pack of cigarettes. He didn’t know why he offered Minho to join him on the roof. Keeping the older at a distance didn’t work at all. As much as he tried not to stay cold, Minho made it really hard for him to hate him. Had he been too mean to him? Did Minho deserve to be treated this way? Taemin wasn’t sure how to act while the taller was around anymore. The other’s presence seemed to completely throw him out of his usual act.

Like a lost puppy, the taller followed Taemin up the now familiar stairs to the rooftop of the building. When they were standing in the spot the dancer usually smoked, he opened the package, taking out the lighter and a cigarette before offering the open package to Minho who took out one with a small nod.

Maybe Taemin should start a conversation – but how?

“So, what do you study?”

“Seriously?” Minho said, exhaling smoke with an eyebrow pulled up.

Taemin could barely make out the taller’s face in the dim light of the streetlamps which only lit up parts of the rooftop – but he could guess the expression on it pretty accurately.

“This is what you are asking me? What my major is?”

“Is it a bad thing to ask you?” Taemin asked back, his cigarette brought to his lips right after.

“Not a bad thing, I just hoped for something that isn’t as basic. Also, don’t you already know the answer to it?”

“I just wanted to start a conversation. I am sorry for snapping at you before. It was a long day.” Under a short breath he added a soft “as always” which Minho pretended not to hear.

“Well, conversation is started. What now?”

“You answer my question.” -- Smoke was blown into the night

“Law.” A stream of smoke slowly mixed with the air, vanishing in the darkness.

“Interesting.” inhale – silence - exhale.

“Not really. You might have noticed that I barely go to lectures. If I could, I'd had quit years ago.” Minho said, leaning over the dark green barrier, looking down onto the street.

“That would be a dumb move.” Taemin said, joining Minho, his cigarette held between his lips.

“Why?”

The street below them was quiet apart from the few people that walked along the bumpy roads and the occasional car passing by. They were watching it anyway.

“You have the possibility to get somewhere in your life. Why would you throw that away?”

“I don’t need a degree in law to get somewhere. There are a million other ways.”

“But none of them are as certain and safe as this one. You know, if I could, I would go to university as well, get a piece of paper that would make my life easier. Maybe get out of the life I have now.” Taemin said softly and Minho was able to hear a lot in the tone of his voice. It wasn’t desperation, it wasn’t anger. It was sadness.

For the first time since they had been watching the street over the barrier, Minho turned his head to look at Taemin’s profile that was warmly lit up by the streetlamps below them, watching how a stream of smoke came out of the long-haired male’s mouth.

Minho didn’t know how to answer. He felt like it didn’t matter what he said, he wouldn’t be able to remove the sadness from Taemin’s face.

“Don’t look at me like that.” The dancer said, turning his head towards the taller, his hair falling over his shoulder.

“How?” Minho said, looking right back into Taemin’s eyes.

“You pity me.”

“I don’t.”

“Yes, you do.”

“I care about you. There is a difference.” Minho said, his cigarette burning in his fingers, completely forgotten for a minute.

“I don’t see how there is a difference.” Taemin said, finally breaking the eye contact to bring his cigarette back to his lips, inhaling the chemicals to calm his heart down.

“You should though, because you obviously care about me.” Minho said, following Taemin’s example inhaling more smoke than he should have, coughing slightly.

“And what makes you think that?” the long-haired male gave back.

“First of all, you took me in when I had nowhere else to go. Secondly, you just told me about yourself to convince me not to throw away my education. And last but not least, you are constantly trying to distance yourself from me because you know staying close to me will make me break through this wall of protection you have built for years.”

Taemin was quiet. Too quiet. Minho didn’t like it.

“You can’t tell me I am wrong - I may not attend uni much, but I am not dumb.”

“How dare you make assumptions like that.” Taemin finally spoke. “I hate you so much.”

Minho’s heart sunk.

“I hate what you are doing to me. I hate that you are right. And I think I hate myself the most because I know that I’ll give in at some point. Because I am weak like that.” The last part was barely a whisper followed by the last pull on the cigarette.

Taemin rubbed the stub on the barrier and threw it down into the empty street.

“There, are you satisfied?”

Minho followed Taemin’s example letting his finished cigarette fall down as well, turning around to look at the smaller male.

“Yes. That was a good talk.”

“Let’s go down.”

“Nah” Minho answered, taking two steps towards the dancer only stopping when their heads were almost touching.

“Let’s stay for a little longer.” He said with a throaty voice, staring into Taemin’s eyes. The younger knew exactly what was coming and he could have prevented it. He didn’t.

Minho pecked Taemin’s lips very softly and before he could move away again, the dancer’s hands took a hold of his strong neck, pressing his lips back against Minho’s, a lot more passionately.

The taller placed his hands on the dancer’s hips, pulling him closer by their bottom half while the other did so for their upper half, deepening the kiss further. It was hard for Minho to keep his balance while Taemin pressed against his body eagerly. He had to take a few steps back until his behind met the barrier of the rooftop, keeping him in place.

Taemin’s fingers were curling into his hair, gripping it tightly while his tongue explored the taller’s mouth. His second hand was placed on Minho’s shoulder, caressing the other’s body through the fabric of his jacket gently.

Their heads were turning every few seconds, trying new angles, lips moving against each other in an undefined rhythm. Taemin sucked on Minho’s lips from time to time or pulled them with his teeth while Minho followed his lead and enjoyed the things Taemin was doing to him. Soon, both of them were breathing heavily so their movements slowed down. Once more, Minho followed what the younger did and stopped moving his head all together, only their lips still rubbing against each other.

While they were catching their breath, very slowly, Taemin’s lips massaged Minho’s and a tongue occasionally licked its way along the taller’s.

“hmmm” Taemin moaned into Minho’s mouth, making the other shiver for a second and grab onto his hips harder. With time and as their kiss got messier again, Minho’s hands wandered from Taemin’s hips to his buttocks, massaging the muscular behind as well as he could.

Of course, this didn’t go by unnoticed by Taemin who immediately pressed his crotch harder against the taller male’s, whose eyes opened for a second, only to see that Taemin’s were still closed.

Minho felt Taemin’s privates waking against his own manhood, groaning into the kiss. Which made the dancer open his eyes and break the kiss for the first time in five minutes.

“Come.” He said with a hoarse voice, taking one of the hands, that was still placed on his behind, in his own, pulling Minho after him like the other had before, to get him to eat something.

“Where are we going?” Minho asked, slightly out of breath, voice no steadier than Taemin’s.

“I have a blanket stored over there.” Taemin answered shortly before opening a box and pulling out a blanket that looked like it had seen the Korean war.

“It is old, but it is warm and thick.” The dancer let go of Minho’s hand, spreading the blanket on the cold grey floor.

“Get on it.” He said shortly and the taller did as he was told without having to be told twice.

“Good boy.” Taemin commented and joined Minho who was lying on his back, looking up at the dancer.

“I am sorry it smells like cigarettes.” He added but was silenced by Minho’s lips that were suddenly placed back on his. Taemin’s hair was hanging down, tickling the taller’s face, getting caught in between their lips several time but neither of them seemed to mind much.

Taemin had taken his position between Minho’s spread legs, holding himself up on his knees and arms to not put too much pressure on the taller’s body.

Minho on the other hand didn’t like the space between their chests and even less the space between their privates. It was only a matter of seconds before his arms closed around Taemin’s upper body, hugging him to pull his body down. The dancer wasn’t strong enough to keep up with the taller’s strength and was finally pressed right against Minho’s warm body.

Their kiss resumed to be as heated as it had been before, but now their bodies had a lot more possibilities to react to each other. Taemin’s hands were roaming Minho’s sides, enjoying the warmth of it while constantly putting his hair behind his ears to stop it from disturbing the kiss. Why didn’t he bring a hairband?

Minho though, didn’t seem to mind much, as he kept his eyes closed and his lips busy.

“You look good like this” Taemin commented after opening his eyes for a few seconds. Their lips weren’t even a centimetre apart, just enough to be able to speak.

“Shut up.” Minho answered a little too harsh while blushing hard at the compliment he didn’t mind compliments, usually. But having Taemin tell him he looked good was too much to handle. His face burned up and he was blinking in shame- something Taemin didn't see due to the lack of lighting.

“I always say the wrong things, don’t I?” Taemin said, distancing himself a little further which resulted in Minho pushing himself up to his elbows.

“Not at all.” The taller said, reaching for Taemin’s hair with his hands, brushing a strand of it that had gotten lose behind the dancer’s ear.

Taemin froze for a second while goose bumps spread all over his body and his heart sped up. Silence.

“Why are you crying?” Minho said, voice worried.

“I am not.” Taemin said and the other reached for his eye.

“You are tearing up.” The taller spoke very softly, brushing away a wet spot below Taemin’s eye.

The dancer quickly got up, leaving Minho on the blanket by himself

“It’s dark up here you have seen wrong. I’ll leave first.”

Before Minho was able to properly reply, Taemin had already walked off and closed the door behind him.

Suddenly this place that had felt warm and loving, was cold and hard. Now that Taemin was gone, nothing held him up here, so Minho folded the blanket and put it back into the box where it belonged. He hadn’t noticed the stench it had before, but now he felt like he could smell each and every cigarette Taemin had ever smoked while being covered with it. That was at least how he imagined the dancer in winter up here, alone, looking at the world around him, covered in this blanket.

They had such a good moment and somehow, he managed to destroy it.

“Well done, Choi Minho.” He scolded himself.

Spotting the package of cigarettes on the barrier, he took it with him, locking the door after him and then walking down the stairs to the apartment.

He wanted to talk to Taemin, tell him that he was sorry for overstepping the boundary. Was it because he touched his hair? He vaguely remembered Taemin once telling him he didn’t like it when people touched his hair. But was it really possible for that to be the reason? A few more minutes Minho waited in front of the door, giving Taemin enough time to go to his room.

When he finally entered the dark apartment, he was surprised to see light in the bathroom instead of Taemin’s room. Kibum seemed to be asleep.

Should he go to sleep as well? What time was it? Should he go outside again to avoid making Taemin uncomfortable when he came out of the bathroom?

With a look at the clock on the wall, he decided he should get to bed. Tomorrow morning, he had arranged an appointment with the bank and being late for that would minimise his chances to get full control over all his assets.

Soon after taking his shoes off, he was lying on the couch, covered by the thin blanket he had been given, trying to shift into a comfortable position.

He couldn’t help but wait for Taemin to leave the bathroom. His mind was constantly reminding him of the progress the two of them made tonight. His lips were still pulsing from their kiss and he had to resist the urge of touching them.

The clock kept ticking and there was still no sign of the dancer leaving the bathroom. Minho wondered what the other was doing in there so long.

His eyes got heavier, and he had to fight not to fall asleep.

A fight he lost before he could hear Taemin, twenty minutes later, tiptoeing to his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N  
> Hi everyone!!
> 
> It would mean the world to me to hear from you in the comments, be it how you are or what you thought of the chapter.
> 
> Anywayyy stay tuned for more and I'll see ya guys next time!! Have a good one!
> 
> xx
> 
> R


	23. What if I Want to Belong to Someone But Am not Worth it?

The mood on Thursday afternoon was tense, Minho knew Taemin’s plans for the night and the latter was fully aware that the taller knew about it. 

“Can’t you just not go?” Minho asked Taemin who had been staying in his room until now. 

“I would appreciate you not involving yourself in this. It’s not for much longer.” Taemin said, getting ready to go upstairs. 

“But I could take a look at the contract, I know a little something about law and-“

“I.Said.Leave.It.” Taemin’s voice was dry. “This is my mess. Not yours.” 

This time, Taemin didn’t invite Minho to the roof to smoke. He really didn’t need the taller judging his decisions, thinking he could get him out of this Situation.

When the dancer came back down, Minho had left the apartment, leaving only a note that said he was out to get groceries and check a few things with the bank. Taemin wasn’t disappointed per-se, but deep down he wanted Minho to hold him back, to keep him from what awaited him tonight. But that was something he would never admit. 

When it slowly got darker and the taller hadn’t returned still, Taemin went to the bathroom to get ready. Stripping bare, he did his best not to catch his reflection in the mirror. From a bottom drawer he got the anal showerhead he uses to clean himself out and started the familiar procedure. 

About twenty minutes later he was completely done showering, including washing his long hair, and started applying makeup, on his face first then some on his hips to cover the faint red lines. When he put his hair up in a bun, he went to his room to dress up properly; a crop top in dark red, a black leather jacket and white skinny jeans did the trick.

He left the apartment shortly before 10pm, later than usual. Had he waited for Minho to come back? He didn’t know, and it didn’t matter since the taller didn’t return in time. 

Only three more weeks. He had gotten through worse. Constantly, he reminded himself that this wasn’t for much longer, but nevertheless, he dreaded the night. Not because of the physical part, but mostly because of the mental torture. 

Erotes stood before him as it always did, Taemin didn’t remember it changing at any point of his work there. 

“Tae! your first appointment is in 10 minutes you should hurry up and get the room ready. Here’s their file, check it out!” Daeun said when she saw Taemin walking past her without a greeting. 

To him it didn’t really matter what she said, he nodded and then checked the room he was assigned to. He rarely had reason to complain about the rooms, as long as it was pre-booked sessions, he never got bad ones. 

The first customers were new, he had never even heard their names before – therefore he didn’t quite know what was ahead. He pulled up his shirt a little more, revealing parts of his chest tattoo, opened his hair as he laid down halfway, his back held up by the big black cushions to wait for the customers to enter the room. 

Not much longer

Those words he repeated like a mantra in his head while minutes were passing slowly. 

Not much longer until he could go home. 

Not much longer until the contract was over. 

Not much longer until he could talk to Kibum again without feeling guilty. 

  1. much longer until he could look Minho in the eyes again. 



His train of though was interrupted by two men entering the room. They were maybe a little over 40 but seemed to be quite in shape for their age. Taemin forced a seductive smile on his face while scanning the two men. Neither of them seemed to be drunk which was a good sign. Drunk men were the worst. 

“Hi handsome” the taller of the two said. “You look even better than in your photograph. I am glad I booked you.” 

“Thank you, Sir. You don’t look too bad yourself.” Taemin smirked, leaving his dignity far behind.

“Take off your clothes. I want to see you.” The same man said while the second one still stood by the door. 

“What about your hot friend, doesn’t he want to see me as well?” Taemin said, getting up from the bed and walked towards the quiet man. 

“He’s just here to watch” the taller said, touching Taemin’s behind

“To watch you say?” the long-haired male spoke softly while playing with the hem of his shirt. “I better give him a good show then.” 

After taking one step closer to the quiet male, he pulled his shirt over his head, licking his lips after letting it fall on the floor – his eyes closely locked with the ones of the man. 

“Join us anytime handsome.” Taemin said seductively before turning his attention to the taller male who had already removed his shirt and immediately started fondling with Taemin’s belt, opening it without problems when the latter stood close enough.

Taemin knew he was good at this. He knew he looked beautiful spread below this man who furiously pounded into his hot hole. He knew that the moans that left his throat went straight to the man’s dick, making the latter come more easily. 

From time to time, he looked over to the shy male who was still standing by the door, visibly turned on by the situation, watching every move his friend made closely. Everything was automatic. Taemin noticed the man’s orgasm probably before he did, and when he finally came into the condom, the long-haired male held it at the bottom and pulled the man out of his hole. 

As much as he wondered about the backstory of these two men, he didn’t allow himself to be interested, closing his mind off once more while getting a few bills as his tip and the two men left the room. Taemin was left with his 30’000 Won tip, naked, in a room he had to vacate in 10 minutes. 

It was just enough time to clean off the lube, throw away the used condom and put his clothes back on. On the way out, he met the woman who had to clean up the mess they made and change the sheets. Honestly, he would choose this job over his any time. 

After checking his next appointment, he got ready to do everything all over again. The room was a little different. Not one he hadn’t been in before though. It held many memories of earlier days, but he was already in his state of complete indifference that none of those could harm him. 

It was as if he got into a space of his mind where nothing could touch him emotionally. It was a façade, one he desperately needed. One which was always activated when he found himself in a sexual situation. 

Was it self-protection? Probably. 

The next customer came and left. Taemin cleaned himself again, getting ready for number three – hoping the next one would leave more tips than this one. 

Another room, another customer, 20’000 Won. 

He was getting tired. 

Checking with Daeun who still stood behind the counter, he saw that there were only two more to go – he was already through more than half of the night. 

“Check your make-up” the short-haired woman said when Taemin left for the next room. 

“Sure.” He mumbled taking a detour to the changing rooms where he re-touched his make-up and brushed his hair. 

Minho was probably sleeping. Kibum was sleeping for sure – or having sex with Jinki. How was it that he was here? Taemin looked at his reflection for a little too long. Only for a second his façade fell. 

He shook his head to get back into his space. But that wasn’t as easy now that he was by himself. His whole insides were rebelling, and he suddenly felt dizzy. 

You’re worthless. 

It wasn’t a big thought. It was just a small one. In the very back of his mind but it was enough for his eyes to get clouded with tears. 

“Not much longer” Taemin said while breathing in deeply. “You are going to be ok.” 

He blinked rapidly to get rid of the tears without ruining his make-up. “You are going to be ok Lee Taemin.”

“You have been through this before.” 

In the new room, he didn’t even bother to wait for the customer to come inside to take off his clothes but spread out completely naked while he was still alone. He felt himself drifting away, his façade building slowly while he was watching the door, one hand on his dick, one on his nipples. 

“Come in” Taemin said when he heard the knock at the door. Another man – probably in his thirties entered and immediately smirked. It wasn’t a pretty smirk. 

“My bitch already ready for me. This is how I like you. Long-time no see slut.”

He was vaguely familiar, but quite honestly, Taemin didn’t remember many of his customers – only the returning ones, or the ones he was abused by. 

“Get over here and prove to me you aren’t too old to please me.” 

Taemin got up and walked over to the man who had freed his penis in the meantime. 

This man was a little rougher than the previous but nothing Taemin couldn’t handle. Also, he was done within a few minutes, leaving the room shortly after putting his clothes back on. 

The session he had booked was for half an hour so Taemin had a break, not bothering to put on his clothes but just laid in the bed that still smelled like sex. To be frank, he barely noticed it anymore – it was a smell he had gotten used to by now. The mix of sweat, lubricant and bodily fluids were something he had gotten familiar with ages ago. 

He closed his eyes for a while – he was tired but there was only one more to go – he could do that. Grabbing a few tissues from the desk, he cleaned himself up as good as he could, paying most of the attention to his behind where lube was still coating his hole. 

By now his hair was a real mess and he tried to make the best out of it by pulling it back into a ponytail while he walked to his last room to wait for the next customer. 

It wasn’t his favourite room – mostly because he hated dressing-up and this one had a closet full of very provocative women’s clothes. Due to his hair, many men fetishized him into the “ladyboy” he was not. 

With a sigh, he entered and was already greeted by his last customer who was roaming through the closet, eying all the different options he had.

A school uniform and 10 minutes of intercourse later, Taemin was finally done. He left the room in a hurry to get his things from the changing room. It was 3 in the morning, but it felt as if it was at least 6. 

The motorcycle was parked a few streets away and he did his best to ignore whatever profanities were shouted at him and whatever offers were made. He kept walking, just looking at the floor to not attract more attention than he already did. 

His ass was sore and as always, the vibrations of the motorcycle weren’t pleasant at all. Nevertheless, he sped up and drove towards their apartment in crazy speed, the city flying by him. Due to the incredible speed it didn’t take too long for him to arrive near the apartment complex, where he parked the motorcycle next to a 7/11. 

The part timer that was working, he was familiar with by now. He seemed to work the night shift every Thursday, so they usually met after Taemin was done with work. Although they had never spoken about anything but necessities, it was nice to see someone familiar who didn’t know anything about him each and every Thursday night. It has only been 8 weeks, but the cashier whose name was Seong Woobin, was always the first person to see him and treat him like a normal human being again.

With a bottle of Soju in his hands, he walked over to the counter to grab a pack of cigarettes and pay for his things. 

“That’s 12’200 Won” Seong Woobin said and Taemin held out two 10’000 Won bills he had gotten for tips tonight.

“Here you go”

“Thank you.” Seong Woobin said, bowing slightly. “Have a good night.” 

“You too have a good night.” Taemin answered, walking out of the store right after.

When he was about to start his motorcycle, he realised that at home, Minho was sleeping on the couch where he usually drank his bottle of soju. Should he drink it in his room? 

In the end he decided that it was good enough to drink out here. Minho didn’t need to catch him drinking again. He worried enough – so much it was annoying. 

He walked back into the 7/11, sitting down on one of the plastic chairs. 

“Can I get a cup?” He asked Seong Woobin who was slightly confused at the change of habit. 

“Sure, here you go.”

It didn’t need more than 20 minutes for Taemin to finish the bottle – he drank it as if it was water. Seong Woobin was reading something behind the counter while the long-haired male took the last sips of his Soju. 

Because he drank so fast, Taemin didn’t feel the alcohol yet. But that would change soon. Even if he knew that, he felt like he needed to drink some more, to really get him drunk enough to sleep without having nightmares. 

A new bottle was taken fast and opened the instant he arrived back at his table. After a few more cups and minutes, the alcohol finally made it into his system. Taemin didn’t notice the occasional look he got from Seong Woobin who couldn’t help but look over to the long-haired male every few minutes. 

Therefore, Taemin jerked in surprise when the worker’s face suddenly appeared next to his. 

“Are you ok? You should stop drinking.”

“I need this.” Taemin just said, making Seong Woobin’s face look worried. 

“Maybe you need someone to talk? I have nothing to do anyways. Can I join you?” 

Taemin was confused, why would Seong Woobin suddenly want to talk to him? They had known each other for weeks. Where did the sudden interest come from? Why was everyone suddenly interested in him? Minho too, why did he even care?

“I am so fucking dumb.” Taemin said without thinking and Seong Woobin decided it was the right moment to sit down across from him, drinking the rest of his cup. 

“Hey, that’s mine.” 

“You didn’t pay for it yet, so technically it is still mine.” 

“So, if I pay for something it belongs to me? Does someone who pays for me own me?”

Seong Woobin’s eyebrows furrowed, not quite knowing what to make of this question. 

“That’s not how it works, no.”

“What if I want to belong to someone but am not worth it?” Taemin continued. 

“I can’t even have sex with him without pulling away the instant feelings are getting involved.”

From second to second, the poor student felt more out of place while Taemin kept talking. Speaking out what has been in his mind for quite a while now. 

“What do I do if I like him but cannot like him? It doesn’t make sense. I know he likes me, he told me. But I cannot like him! It’s not fair. I am too fucked up. Hell, I started crying because of him brushing my hair out of my face. How am I supposed to like him? How can this ever work out? Isn’t it the best to just close up and let him live a better life? I know he could.”

“Let me stop you right there.” Seong Woobin said, interrupting Taemin’s train of thought. 

“Why.”

“Just let me clarify: He confessed to you, you like him too but rejected him because you cried when he brushed your hair out of your face?”

“I didn’t like him when he confessed to me. I don’t think I did. Oh god why am I even telling you all of this. As if you care.” Taemin mumbled the last part drinking a big sip directly from the bottle. 

“That’s not the point here. The point is that none of what you say is making any sense. If you two like each other, just give it a try.”

“You know nothing about me.”

“Then give me something to work with. Like I said, I have time.”

Taemin sighed for the millionth time that night. The alcohol clouded his mind and he didn’t feel the need to hide anything anymore. Before he knew it, he was talking about Minho. Talking about him for solid five minutes. 

“I just really don’t know how to handle it. I am not capable of having a healthy relationship. There are reasons that I won’t talk about.”

“No need to share.” Seong Woobin said, talking another sip of Soju and Taemin followed his lead. 

“Letting him in is so hard.” It wasn’t long until tears were collecting in his eyes and a sob escaped his throat. 

“I want to. I really do. But I can’t.” His sentences were short, often interrupted by smaller and bigger sobs. The poor cashier had no idea how to handle the crying male and just kept listening. “And I have no idea how I will ever be able to be intimate with him. It hurts so much to let go. It hurts so much to open up.”

“Tell him.” 

“What?” Taemin said, his eyes trying to focus on Seong Woobin’s face. 

“Tell him what you told me now.”

“I could never.” The long-haired male said, tears drying slowly. 

“Then don’t. But you should go home now. And also, I will keep this bottle.” The worker grabbed the green bottle as he said and got up from the chair – leaving Taemin alone with his thoughts. 

He couldn’t tell Minho. Could he? Even in his intoxicated state, he knew that a confession would have consequences he wasn’t prepared to take on.

Should he go home now? There was no other place to go… Slowly he got up from the chair, his head spinning as he realised how drunk he actually was. It was hard to stand straight but he somehow managed to walk out the door, too embarrassed to face Seong Woobin anymore. 

Taking the motorcycle, of course, wasn’t an option anymore, so he just left it parked next to the 7/11 and walked to the apartment. During those five minutes he felt more and more alcohol entering his system and he instantly regretted getting a second bottle of Soju. One would have been more than enough. 

No matter how hard he tried, the things Seong Woobin said wouldn’t get out of his head. Telling Minho that he had feelings for him shouldn’t be as hard as it was, especially because he knew that it was mutual. But did he want Minho to know what he felt for him? Maybe he did. Maybe it would feel good to get it out in the open. Taemin knew he wouldn’t tell him when he was sober.

It was now or never. Knowing how much of a coward he was, he was sure that if he didn’t do it now, he would never speak it out aloud. Heck, he didn’t even know for how much longer Minho would be around. 

He entered the elevator as soon as it arrived, trembling – unsure if it was because of the cold or because of nervousness. His heart was beating faster with each floor he passed. 

It took him three tries to enter the code, the lock signalling him the passcode was wrong way too loudly. Before, he never noticed how loud the sounds were – now he felt like he was waking the whole block.

Taemin almost fell over while taking off his shoes, only barely catching himself by holding onto the doorknob. Kibum’s room was open which meant he was probably sleeping over at Jinki’s place. He couldn’t blame him for not wanting to hear how late he came home after selling his body. The clock on the wall said 4:25am. Did he really spend that much time in the convenience store? It had felt way shorter. 

“Taemin is that you?” A raspy voice asked. “What time is it?” Minho asked and Taemin heard the fabric of his blanket rustle as the sleepy male sat up. 

“Half past four.” Taemin managed to utter, his tongue heavy. 

“Are you drunk?” Minho said, sounding more awake than before. 

“I am not drunk.” The dancer tried to say as carefully as possible to hide how drunk he actually was, but it was no use. As he walked towards his room, suddenly the small light by the TV lit up and he had to cover his eyes at the sudden brightness. 

“I am sure you are not.” Minho said, eyes slightly red from just waking up. 

“That’s right.” Without another word, Taemin went to the bathroom. He needed to pee desperately. He didn’t even bother to close the door before opening his pants and releasing himself over the bowl. 

After tucking his penis back in to his pants half-heartedly, Taemin removed the make-up that felt like a new layer of skin. While he was doing so, Minho appeared in the door frame. 

“I am heating water for some tea. Come over when you are done.” Was all he said before walking back to the kitchen table.

Taemin’s mind was wandering as he put some moisture cream on his face. Why did Minho make him tea? He was old enough to make tea for himself. He didn’t need Minho. 

He doesn’t need Minho.

He will never need Minho. 

It was just that he wanted him so badly. 

So badly it hurt. Seong Woobin was right. He had to tell him. 

Without another second of hesitation, Taemin walked out of the bathroom, doing his best to walk in a straight line – not really succeeding. But it was good enough.

Instead of sitting across from Minho, he moved his hand along the taller’s shoulder, confusing him completely. 

“I have something to tell you.” Taemin said, sitting on the table, his legs spread lazily while looking down at Minho who suddenly seemed wide awake. 

“Tell me you want me to move out and should stop intruding your life? I was planning to do so anyway.” The older said, his gaze not carrying any emotions. As if it was the easiest thing to do. 

“I like you.” It was spoken clearly. Minho heard it. Minho stayed silent for a few seconds. Those words he had wanted to hear so badly were now the ones that squeezed his heart painfully. 

“Do you hate me that much? Do you hate me enough to hurt me this way?” Minho asked, his eyes slowly filling with tears. 

“I never thought you would play with me that way. I handled your rejection; I know last night was a mistake. But this is no reason for this. I am leaving in the morning.” The taller continued, keeping his voice as steady as possible while Taemin got more and more confused. 

“I am serious though. What are you talking about?” He said, barely articulating the words. 

“You have made yourself clear enough. I can’t handle this.” Minho was about to get up when Taemin saw his chance slipping away. He let himself fall forward, pressing the taller back onto the chair. Slowly he lifted his right hand, caressing the side of Minho’s face with it, making the other freeze in his spot. 

“What-“ Minho started but was silenced by a small peck on the lips. 

“I like you, Choi Minho.” Taemin said again, his tongue still as heavy as before. 

“I have liked you for a while, man. I cannot tell you that I like you though.” He continued, reality warping. "I shouldn’t like you. My body is dirty. I have been fucked seven times tonight. Isn’t that fun? And still, I can't even have sex with you. I am sorry”  So, I cannot tell you that I like you. Because you would never let me go if you knew about it.” Taemin’s eyelids were heavy, his eyes only barely open.

Minho’s eyes got bigger. Seeing Taemin like this he knew that the younger wasn’t playing, he wasn’t lying. The alcohol made him speak the truth. 

The long-haired male had trouble holding himself up. He was so tired. His head was spinning but there was something warm beneath him and he just wanted to sink into it. Fall asleep and never wake up again. It felt safe. 

“I really, really like Choi Minho. But he can never know.” He repeated once more, his head falling forward, meeting with the warm thing. He snuggled into it until he felt his whole body pressed against the warmth. 

_A/N_   
  


It has been a while, I am sorry. Life has been busy. But here ya go!   
Also: I am finishing up the last chapter probably this or next week. if you want to be part of a last decision click this [LINK](https://twitter.com/aimrwv/status/1284954194709893120?s=20)

_Leave a comment if you like this and I hope you have a great day!!!_

_R_


	24. Warm Body

Minho stirred awake when something noisy entered the room. Even if he wasn’t completely awake, he knew that it had to be Taemin coming home from work. For a few moments he hesitated – should he pretend to be asleep? The other surely wouldn’t appreciate him seeing him so early in the morning. But before he knew it, he already spoke up in a raspy voice.

“Taemin? Is that you? What time is it?” While speaking he got up from the couch to turn on the light.

“Half past four” Taemin said and Minho instantly knew that the latter was drunk – he barely articulated the words, making it hard for Minho to understand.

“Are you drunk?”

“I am not drunk.” The obviously drunk male replied shortly before Minho’s hands found the light switch. The moment he saw Taemin, his heart dropped, he looked even worse than his voice sounded.

His eyes were red and glossy, his hair was a complete mess just like the sad, left-over make-up. He looked tired and unstable while he walked towards the bathroom with a very apparent limp, covering his eyes at the sudden brightness.

“I am sure you are not.” Minho said while watching how Taemin disappeared into the bathroom as he mumbled a “That’s right” like it was the most obvious thing ever.

To Minho’s surprise, the long-haired male didn’t even close the door and just seconds after, he heard urine meeting the water of the toilet. The taller couldn’t care less and decided that if he was awake now anyway, he would make tea so Taemin wouldn’t feel as hungover tomorrow morning. He grabbed his hoodie from the armrest of the couch and put it on because he suddenly felt cold after being snuggled up in the warmth of the blanket.

“I am heating water for some tea. Come over when you are done.” Minho let Taemin know just after turning on the kettle. The latter was taking off his makeup and Minho decided he should wait for the younger in the kitchen.

He prepared the tea and shortly after he poured in the water, Taemin came out, walking towards him, obviously concentrating, as his eyes were fixed on the floor. What Minho noticed first, was Taemin’s open pants, which the other didn’t seem to care about. He wasn’t wearing any underwear, so the sight of Taemin’s pubes and upper part of his badly tucked in dick was forced upon him.

Before Minho knew it, Taemin was already standing right next to him, caressing his shoulder with one of his hands.

“I have something to tell you.”

Minho’s mood sunk instantly, if drunk Taemin needed to tell him something it couldn’t be good. The younger didn’t sit on the chair across from Minho’s but threw one leg over him, sitting on the table, looking down at the taller with spread legs, his crotch way too prominent for Minho not to look at it.

“Tell me you want me to move out and to stop intruding on your life? I was planning to do so anyway.” He said, thinking about all the arrangements he had made today. After he left the apartment that day, he got in contact with a real estate agent to visit an apartment near his university. He knew he was a burden to Taemin ever since he confessed to him, and the fact that the dancer had to live with him these days surely was even worse.

“I like you.” Taemin said and Minho’s heart was crushed painfully. Honestly, he shouldn’t be disappointed, but he had thought Taemin was more mature than these kinds of games. That was what it felt like to him. One big game.

First, he rejected him, then they had this wonderful day at the beach and Minho thought something changed between them. Then they almost had sex on the floor of the dance studio – until this day probably his biggest regret. Why couldn’t he man up and take Taemin’s dick? It pretty much ruined it all and even if they continued, the air around them was so strange afterwards. Taemin told him it was a mistake and so crushed all his ideas once and for all.

But why did he let him stay at their apartment? Why did they kiss on the rooftop? Why had it been perfect? Why had it felt so right? And the most important question, why did Taemin leave in such a rush, tears in his eyes? Did he regret it so much?

Now, what was this? Did Taemin really hate him so much? This all seemed like one huge game, one that Minho wasn’t winning.

“Do you hate me that much? Do you hate me enough to hurt me this way?” It was the only plausible reason Minho could come up with, his eyes filling with tears at that realisation.

“I never thought you would play with me that way. I handled your rejection, I know last night was a mistake” He said with a heavy heart, deep down wanting Taemin to tell him he didn’t regret the kiss last night. “But that is no reason for this. I am leaving in the morning.” Minho couldn’t handle anything more, preparing to get away from the dancer who didn’t have anything better to do than speak up again.

“I am serious though” he said, sounding kind of hurt, while barely speaking the words properly. “What are you talking about?”

“You have made yourself clear enough. I can’t handle this.” Minho said, getting up from the chair. But before he could properly stand up, he met the heavy weight of Taemin’s body. Suddenly he was squished under the dancer’s hot body. The latter was now sitting on his lap, looking him in the eyes while lifting a hand. The hand didn’t stop, but started caressing the side of his face, completely startling Minho, whose anger was mixing with confusion.

“What-“ He tried to ask but before he knew what was happening, Taemin closed the distance between their lips and gently pecked his.

“I like you, Choi Minho.” The younger repeated what he had said before, Minho’s heart beating faster. He had no idea what was happening. Why was Taemin so close? Why did he say this twice, wasn’t it supposed to be a game? Why did it sound so sincere? Taemin’s eyes never broke eye contact while he tried to articulate the next sentences.

“I have liked you for a while, man. I cannot tell you that I like you though.” Minho couldn’t react. Seeing how Taemin struggled to know what was real and not, he was almost sure that what he was saying now was the truth. He was in no condition to lie. Hell, he could barely hold himself upright, Minho noticed – his hands holding onto Taemin’s waist to give him stability while he kept speaking.

“I shouldn’t like you. My body is dirty. I have been fucked seven times tonight. Isn’t that fun? And still, I can't even have sex with you. I am sorry” Minho was completely shocked. Was this the reason for all the rejection? That Taemin felt dirty and used? He wasn’t sure how to react, but he didn’t have to as Taemin’s eyes were getting clouded and he kept speaking with a heavy tongue, making it hard for Minho to understand what he was saying.

“So, I cannot tell you that I like you. Because you would never let me go if you knew about it.” By now, Minho’s heart was crushed. Did Taemin really think so badly of himself? He couldn’t believe that the reason for all this drama was that the dancer didn’t believe that he was someone worthy of receiving love. The tears in Minho’s eyes now weren’t for himself but for Taemin. There was one thing the drunk male was right about. ONE single thing. And that was that he wouldn’t back out now. The feelings he had tried to supress surfaced back at once and he was completely overwhelmed, so overwhelmed that he was unable to keep holding up the younger male and Taemin collided with his chest.

“I really, really like Choi Minho. But he can never know.” Taemin mumbled into his chest while snuggling against it, leaving said male completely paralyzed.

Minho had no idea what to do now. Taemin was heavy but he didn’t want to wake him up. Also, he couldn’t process what he had just heard. He couldn’t help but feel incredibly happy, while, at the same time, he felt so sad for the long-haired male that was breathing against his neck. 7 men. How must that feel? To be fucked and left in the cold bed? Left alone only to be joined moments later by another stranger who uses you for their own pleasure?

Apart from the mental pain, Minho, who remembered well how it felt like to be penetrated, wondered if he was also in physical pain. He had rarely felt this way about anyone. Even less the women he had slept with in the past. All Minho wanted to do was hug Taemin, take all the self-loathing off him, stay by his side and show him how affection feels like. He was sure though, that this wasn’t something Taemin would want.

For a few more minutes, Minho didn’t move, enjoying the feeling of Taemin’s warm body on his. But when his legs started to fall asleep due to the lack of blood circulation, he knew that he had to carry the other male to his bed. With some starting problems, Minho finally succeeded in standing up while holding Taemin – his hands grabbing his butt awkwardly. He had to lean back while walking as he couldn’t stabilize Taemin’s upper body, both of his hands busy holding up the younger’s weight.

It was a slow process, but Minho was able to open Taemin’s door with his elbow, his thighs trembling at the workout. Despite the strange position, the younger seemed to be so out of it that he didn’t even stir when Minho struggled to get into his bedroom.

The room was as dark as expected and Minho was taking careful steps not to fall over anything lying on the floor while he carried Taemin to the mattress on the floor.

Minho thought about how much the other must have drunken to be this knocked out – Taemin just kept sleeping while he put him down on the bed awkwardly. Even though he did his best not to let him fall onto the mattress, it was quite hard to put a grown man to bed. Taemin landed on the bed with a small thud and Minho checked if the younger was still sleeping.

For a second, he even contemplated if he should undress the dancer and change him into his pyjamas. He didn’t because he knew that Taemin would kill him if he did. Therefore, he just closed up Taemin’s pants. The other would be embarrassed enough tomorrow morning even without knowing that his privates had been on display for the whole scene. If he remembered the whole thing, that was.

Minho closed the door behind him, returning to the couch where he tried to fall asleep for two hours before giving up. There were too many things going through his head. The scene in the kitchen played over and over until everything blurred together and he couldn’t quite tell what came first.

Would Taemin deny what he said tonight? Did Taemin even realise that he confessed to him or did he think this was all a dream? How should he react when he met Taemin tomorrow? Was it the best to just leave?

He had the need to talk to Jinki. Tell him about everything and get his advice on it. But of course, he couldn’t call him at 5AM, so he was alone with his thoughts. And those thoughts couldn’t stop wandering.

They ended up at Erotes. The place he only visited once. How those people talked about Taemin after they had fucked him. Minho’s whole body was shuddering at the memory. He didn’t want to know what other men had done to him throughout his life, or even just tonight.

What had been the reason for Taemin to drink this much? Did he always drink this much after coming home from Erotes? Minho couldn’t tell, it was the first time he saw it. Just the thought of people fucking the life out of the long-haired male made him sick. He didn’t even want to know what Taemin had to go though only tonight, how those people had touched the ass he had held him up by.

Suddenly, Minho wasn’t so sure if he could let Taemin go on with this job until his contract was over. Suddenly he felt the need to protect him, stronger than that feeling ever was before. He didn’t want anyone else beside him touching his body. He didn’t even want anyone to look at Taemin in a sexual way.

Of course, that was impossible – the younger pretty much made his living off of people who watched him on stage, half naked. He had no right to budge into his life like that. At least he didn’t before tonight. Now, after knowing that Taemin liked him back, the situation changed.

They hadn’t agreed to be in a relationship – by no means – but somehow Minho still felt way more connected than he had before. It pained him to share Taemin. It pained him to see Taemin in pain, now even more than before. This whole confession had made the whole situation much more complicated. He wouldn’t be able to let him go, the younger had been right about that, even in his completely intoxicated state.

Around 7am Minho gave up trying to fall asleep and went to the kitchen to throw away the cold tea and prepared some breakfast. It was finally Friday and he planned to call his grandparents to let them know that he had found an apartment and would come to get his stuff early next week.

While eating and cleaning up the living area Minho tried his best to forget about the events from 4AM, but it was easier said than done. His whole body felt lighter, tingling slightly, and whenever he didn’t think about Taemin’s confession, he wondered where that feeling in his chest came from – which brought him back to where he started.

Taemin probably wouldn’t wake up for many more hours, so Minho put on his hoodie and some pants and went to the closest market to get groceries and when he returned shortly before noon, he finally built up the courage to call his grandparents.

They only talked for a few minutes. And when Minho finally hung up, he felt so much lighter. His grandmother didn’t say much, but she acknowledged the information that he would be moving out next week and didn’t talk down to him. Maybe this time separated was the best thing that could have happened.

The dancer woke up around 3pm, Minho heard him moving around in his room before the door opened and a half naked Taemin walked over to the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Was he going to ignore him? Was he just going to leave? Minho who had been waiting at the kitchen table, was reading through some of the materials that one of his university associates had sent him an hour ago. He was currently trying to find a way for Taemin to get out of that contract before it ended, so he had asked her to send him files on legal actions in illegal institutions.

Because prostitution was illegal, it shouldn’t be possible to bind someone to an institution legally – contract or none. But Minho wasn’t quite sure how it was handled so he had been working through a shit load of documents to find the answers he needed.

Honestly, he barely managed to concentrate on the contents of the texts, constantly waiting for Taemin to open the bathroom door so he could talk to him. After what felt like ages, the door finally opened and a fully clothed and washed Taemin walked out.

“Can we talk?” Minho said, standing up from his chair but Taemin just ignored him and closed the door loudly after going back to his room.

He didn’t know what else he had expected to happen. Minho mentally slapped himself for thinking that this confession would change something. If anything, it made their relationship even worse than it had been before. The incredible euphoria that had filled him ever since this night was suddenly cast away, replaced by a feeling of deep disappointment. He really wanted to try and talk to Taemin but wasn’t sure if he could handle another one of these reactions. Now that the dancer was ignoring him, he felt even worse than when he had rejected his feelings. He could live with that. But to be treated like air after knowing that the feelings are mutual – that was something he couldn’t handle.

Minho closed his laptop and walked towards Taemin’s room, but before he could open the door, it opened by itself, Taemin walking out and stopping in his tracks when he realised that Minho was just an armlength away from him.

“Can we talk?” Minho repeated what he said before.

Taemin didn’t react, didn’t even look at him. All he did was shake his head so more of his long hair would cover his face while he looked on the floor.

“Please?” the taller almost begged.

“I don’t see what there is to talk about.” Taemin said, his voice ice cold.

“You don’t? What the fuck is wrong with you? Did you really expect me to not say anything after what happened tonight?” Minho said, his voice getting louder with each word.

“It was a mistake.” Taemin said, voice not as stable as before.

“So, everything regarding me is a mistake? Talking to me too now?”

“Yes.”

Minho’s heart was frozen by this single word. How could the younger say something like this?

“How can you just say something like this? You confessed to me and now you are pretending I am the worst thing that ever happened to come across you in your life! I can’t handle this!”

“Don’t you understand” Taemin spoke up now, staring into Minho’s eyes with a painful glare. “Don’t you fucking understand?”

“No, Make me.” Minho dared, never breaking eye contact.

“Yes, I regret letting you into my life in the first place. I hate how you make me open up. I cannot explain it to you properly, you wouldn’t get it anyway, but I am broken, don’t you see that? We will only get hurt if we keep this going.”

“Are you afraid that I will treat you badly? Leave you after you opened up?” Minho asked – he didn’t hear the door opening.

“I am afraid of myself. I am afraid I might get hurt by myself.” Taemin whispered looking at his fingers

“What does that have to do with me?”

“I…” Taemin started, searching for words before focusing his attention on something else. He was still standing in the doorframe, now looking at whatever was happening behind Minho.

“I am sorry, am I interrupting something?” Kibum’s voice filled the room and Minho turned around.

It was a question answered by the facial expressions of the two talking men - no reply needed. The glossy eyes were answer enough.

“Sorry.” Kibum said when neither of them answered for a second. “I will just grab a few things.”

He did as he said and, in the meantime, Minho gestured Taemin to sit down. The latter followed unwillingly after Minho had taken hold of his hand, pulling him over. Taemin’s hand in his felt really good. It was small, his fingers short, and the skin was quite rough from dancing on the pole but somehow, it fit inside his bigger one perfectly – the heat of their bodies connecting so well.

Taemin tried to pull away from Minho’s hold as soon as they were seated on the sofa, but the taller wouldn’t let go and just softly caressed the skin of Taemin’s upper hand with his thumb. He struggled for a few more seconds but then Kibum entered the room again and he didn’t want to let him notice their intertwined hands, so he stopped.

“I am out!” he shouted and left the apartment soon after, leaving the other two alone once more.

“Let go of my hand.” Was the first thing Taemin said after the door closed.

“No.” Minho said, earning an angry glare from the smaller. “Can’t we just give it a try? If it doesn’t work out, I won’t pressure it anymore.”

“Why would we try if it is destined to fail?”

“You can't know that”

“Only that I do. I am a hooker Minho. Can you really live with the fact that countless men have fucked my hole before you?”

One might think that by now Minho was used to how badly Taemin talked about himself but it hit him once more and Minho loosened his grip on the latter’s hand. Taemin was able to pull out of the hold.

“Hell, they are still doing it. Can you live with me being fucked by random guys while I am in a relationship with you? Huh?”

“Would I still be here if that really mattered?” Minho said, his hand trying to take Taemin’s again.

“Do you still think you are some sort of Saint? Look me in the eyes and tell me that my job doesn’t affect you at all.” Taemin held his hand in the air, locking their gazes. When Minho didn’t answer instantly, he pressed his lips together and gave him a knowing nod.

“See, you can’t. This is who I am. If you can’t handle it, I am not risking the last bits of me to be damaged. I am sorry.” Taemin said, sadness spreading in his words.

“I… I- “ Minho started but was unable to answer to what Taemin said. It was true that it affected him. He didn’t want Taemin to be fucked by other men. He hated the thought of it. Would admitting it ruin his chances with him forever? Should he lie? Lying would only sound like a bad promise, Minho realised. A Promise he wouldn’t be able to keep. He knew Taemin wouldn’t wait for an answer for much longer as the younger was already getting up from the couch.

“Wait, let me explain.” Minho said, holding Taemin back by his wrist. It seemed that the dancer wanted to hear what he had to say, because he sat down without a comment, ready to listen.

“I mind. I actually mind it a lot. I have hated the thought of you underneath another man from the moment I entered that place. I despise the men hurting you. No one in their right mind would be ok knowing that the person they like is regularly involved in non-consensual intercourse with strangers – no matter if it is payed sex or not.” Minho spoke. He didn’t know where his speech was going but just kept speaking, telling Taemin what was on his mind.

“If you would let me, I would personally go to your boss and demand an annulation of the contract this very moment. But I know you won’t let me. I know you are too proud to let me do that. I think-“ 

Suddendly Taemin spoke up, interrupting Minho’s sentence:

“After the contract is over.” He said with a heavy heart. “We can give it a try. This is all I can give you. No promises, no expectations. And I don’t want to hear anything about how I have to live my life. Either you toughen up or you lose this the moment we start.”

Minho was speechless. He didn’t know what he expected to be the outcome of this talk, but this almost seemed too good to be true. A small smile played on his lips while he did his best not to be overly excited and scare Taemin away again.

“I will.” Was all he said and Taemin stood up.

“I have to leave now. Don’t bring this up when you talk to Kibum. I need to have a talk with him soon anyway.”

“I won’t. I will be leaving on Tuesday anyway. I found an apartment for myself.” Minho said and for a second, he thought he saw a hint of disappointment in Taemin’s eyes, but his verbal reaction proved otherwise.

“That’s good.”

With those words, their talk was over, and the dancer left shortly after for his performances in the evening.

Minho on the other hand opened his laptop to watch parts of the lecture he had missed the last weeks. His classmate had been able to get illegal recordings of the class for him to listen to. The latter had given him a memory card yesterday evening before he had headed to Taemin’s apartment.

But when he searched his hoodie for the memory card, it was gone. Minho was confused? Where could he have lost it? After searching every part of the living room, there was only one more possibility: Taemin’s room.

He must have lost it when he carried the younger to bed last night. He opened the door to the room and looked on the floor. It wasn’t long until he spotted it. It was right there next to the mattress, only part of it sticking out from underneath it. Minho grabbed it, leaving the room as fast as possible as he knew that the dancer hated people invading his privacy – the little bit he had left.

Minho inserted the memory card into his laptop and pressed the import button before walking over to the kitchen to get some water, it would take a while to import the video file anyway.

When he came back, it was already halfway done. The file was loading faster than he thought – it was a two-hour lecture after all.

Only minutes later it was imported completely and Minho pressed play. Instead of his professor though, he saw himself. He saw Taemin.

His throat closed for a second before he realised what exactly this was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N  
> Thanks so much for reading? The story is slowly coming to an end and I hope to hear from you in the comments if you have a spare minute? <3
> 
> stay safe and have a good day <3


	25. Coming Clean

Minho realised this was the tape of them dancing together the second he saw the familiar surroundings. He couldn’t help but stare at the screen while their images started moving together. Next to Taemin he looked like a stick; Completely stiff and uncoordinated. To some extent, it hurt his pride, but then again, he knew that there was no way in the world someone could compete with Taemin’s incredible body control.

He wondered why Taemin had this memory card in his room. Had he re-watched them dancing together after giving it to his boss? Why? Minho still had trouble accepting that Taemin had liked him back for quite a while – the younger really had done a splendid job hiding his feelings. But that was the only explanation that was making sense of why Taemin kept the recording.

Even though Taemin was a whole lot better than him, he found himself enjoying the video, feeling slightly proud at his own performance as well – he didn’t practice it for long and it did look at least halfway decent.

There wasn’t much time left before he had to call the group for his university project, so he started skipping through the tape to see a few more moves they did together. It didn’t take more than a few clicks for him to freeze in shock. Instead of them dancing, he saw Taemin sitting on his crotch, opening his hairband to let his hair flow naturally before he bowed back down to seal their lips in a passionate kiss.

Questions flooded his mind, one of them overshadowing the others: Did they not turn off the camera? Minho’s throat got dry as he answered the question by skipping forward a little more. They were naked on the floor.

This was a full-on sex-tape.

He couldn’t watch.

It was too embarrassing to see himself so vulnerable on the floor. Seeing his own face distort in pleasure was too much for Minho to take.

He closed the laptop instantly, pulling out the memory card and putting it right back to where he found it. Taemin shouldn’t know that he had seen it. If he was lucky, the other one didn’t know yet that it contained ALL of their interaction.

But who was he trying to fool? Of course, Taemin knew.

“FUCK” he muttered as he cleaned the table. His whole face was still burning. What if Taemin watched that? His mind flashed back to the morning when Kibum had gotten angry because Taemin used his laptop. He came on that laptop. Did Taemin masturbate to this tape? Minho was feeling dizzy.

His thoughts were interrupted by his phone ringing loudly, the Kakaotalk ringtone filling the quiet apartment. A few seconds in, after taking deep breaths, to calm himself down, he took the call.

The last days at Taemin and Kibum’s apartment went by fast. He didn’t see either of the two much – it seemed like Kibum tried to avoid Taemin while the latter tried to avoid Minho. Whenever they crossed paths, even if it was only a few minutes they spent in the same room, the air got thicker and heavily awkward.

Neither of them knew how to react in the other’s presence. Minho wasn’t a big fan of seeing Taemin going to work each night over the weekend. He didn’t like it because he knew what he would be doing. Of course, it shouldn’t bother him. They weren’t together but he still had the strong need to get him out of there and keep him for himself.

He talked to Jinki about it on Monday at university, explaining everything that has happened since the last time they had a conversation about this topic. Jinki, much to Minho’s surprise, didn’t say much until the younger confessed that he wanted Taemin exclusively. No one else thirsting over him, no one else touching him.

“I completely understand what you are saying. I was in a similar position with Kibum. But I must tell you that as for now, you don’t have much of a say in what he does with his life. Taemin obviously doesn’t want anyone intruding on his life and if you already talk like this, I am not sure if this will go well.”

“Yes, I do get that. But you know best how much I want him for myself.” Minho answered and Jinki sighed.

“I do get that. A lot actually. I don’t know Taemin really but from what I heard from Kibum you’ll need to put yourself second.”

Minho couldn’t answer because their seminar started and he was left with many thoughts, making it impossible to concentrate on what the professor was talking about. Hearing what Jinki said to him hit hard. Maybe he really needed to work on himself first before entering a relationship with Taemin.

Those thoughts stayed with him as he moved into his own apartment. He didn’t buy more than he needed. A matrass, a table and a single chair. The place was still unfamiliar and cold. Now living completely by himself, it left him with a lot of time to think. He was sure that the Minho from last year would have been more than thrilled to live alone, bringing girls home regularly without having to worry about anyone judging his decisions and his life-style. But now, everything was so different. Not once did he bring anyone to his place. Jinki was the only one to ever set foot into it and that purely because the latter had helped him move a few of his things.

The next Thursday night he had trouble sleeping and was sitting on the floor by the window, watching the lights as he let his thoughts travel to the long-haired male. He knew exactly what the other was doing. And he hated it. He despised the thought of Taemin getting used by anyone. But at the same time Jinki’s words kept replaying in his head. Who was he to interfere with the younger’s life?

“Why is this so complicated?!” He shouted in pure frustration before burying his face in his hands.

“Why is this so hard? Why did I fall in love with you Lee Taemin??” These questions were asked more desperately, and he felt tears forming in his eyes. He just had to get through two more weeks. Taemin told him they could try. So why was it that HE felt unworthy of being with the younger? The realisation hit him hard as he reflected on how he acted in Taemin’s presence.

All he could see was him not respecting the younger’s words, not leaving him alone when he was told to, obsessing over him on a regular basis. This wasn’t how his parents taught him.

His parents would be ashamed of him if they saw what became of him. His sister would no longer look up to him. He suddenly regretted the past years of his life while he thought about what kind of person he had become. The amount of one-night stands he had had. The number of drugs he had done just to cope with his bleeding heart.

Minho was suddenly painfully aware of himself and spent the rest of the night beating himself up about it while constantly having a subconscious feeling of uneasiness because of Taemin’s whereabouts.

Taemin dreaded Saturday. He had sent Kibum, who was barely at their apartment anymore, a message to spend this Saturday with him. Both knew for what reason, and it made it difficult for the younger to fall asleep Friday night but getting up was even worse.

Kibum was sitting in the kitchen, eating breakfast when Taemin joined him and for the longest minute, they were both completely silent. The awkward air around them was thick and it needed all of Taemin’s courage to mumble a short “Good morning” as he grabbed a bowl of rice to eat breakfast with his friend.

They hadn’t been talking for a while so starting a conversation was easier said than done and Taemin just couldn’t bring himself to speak up as he was to ashamed to do so.

Therefore, it was Kibum who interrupted the silence nearly five minutes after the younger sat down.

“You wanted to talk to me?” He tried to push Taemin into finally speaking up.

“Yes…”

“So, talk. Speak for yourself.” Kibum didn’t sound angry, but impatient of some sort and Taemin finally put down his chopsticks to clear the situation.

“Kibum, I am sorry.” Taemin started what was about to be a long monologue that the older didn’t interrupt even once.

“I really don’t know why but I have messed up so badly lately.” He took a deep breath. “There have been so many things happening and I have completely lost track of myself. Hell- I don’t even recognise myself anymore. And somewhere along those lines I have also lost track of our friendship. I have never wanted this to go this far and it isn’t hard to say when this all started but I want you to know that I regret what happened to make me walk this road. I have told you about my past and you also know that it is the present as well. So, I wanted to come clean. Completely clean.” Taemin stopped for a few seconds, watching the changes in Kibum’s face as the latter nodded for him to continue.

“I didn’t calculate the water and electricity bill when I told you I could afford to provide for both of us.” He admitted and the older’s face instantly fell. Kibum looked as if he was close to crying but Taemin continued anyway – nothing was stopping him now.

“There was no possible way for me to pay for it that month while still paying rent and food. I just couldn’t tell you.” Taemin felt as if something was closing his throat while he was speaking, tears forming in his eyes as he remembered the decision he made that day.

“You had just given in and started your new life. I couldn’t take that away from you. You deserve so much better Kibum. I… I- “ he had to take a break as the need to cry was getting more and more intense. “I- I just couldn’t do that to you. I am so so sorry for not telling you about it.”

Kibum by now was sobbing and Taemin couldn’t keep himself from crying anymore either. So he just continued speaking through the tears.

“Then we were at Jinki’s birthday party and I was getting too drunk to think rationally. And it was just so close to where I used to…” Taemin tried again: “Where I used to… you know…”

“And I… I really regret nothing more than setting a foot into that place again. I just didn’t think straight.”

“So, all this, is this my fault?” Kibum almost whispered shortly before his sobs got louder and he tried to keep them in by holding his hand over his mouth.

“NONONO!” Taemin almost shouted, reaching for Kibum’s shoulder. “Never think that. Promise me. Don’t you dare think that this is your fault. I could have gotten this money in so many more ways, starting with just asking Jonghyun for it.”

“How can you say that? You did it to protect me! So, if it wasn’t for me you would have never gotten back into that place.” Kibum took a hold of Taemin’s smaller hand.

“This is such a messed-up situation.” Kibum sobbed again, completely unsure of how this was supposed end.

“I am so sorry for dragging you into this. I wasn’t planning on telling you. I only signed for 10 nights and those will be over soon.”

“Do you think you are making this situation any better?!?” Kibum shouted at him, hitting his upper arm now instead of gently holding his hand. “How could you keep this from me like this?!”

It took over 10 minutes until Kibum had calmed down, Taemin letting himself be hit over and over by the older who was so incredibly frustrated and hurt. Words were thrown back and forth, tears were streaming down their faces as they were shouting their feelings at each other.

Another 10 minutes later they were sitting on the couch, crying in each other’s arms. Kibum’s face was pressed against Taemin’s chest while the latter buried his in the raven hair. Everything had already been said so there was no need to say anything else and they just cried for each other.

“I have one more question.” Kibum said when they both stopped crying.

“As long as you don’t want details, I will answer anything.” Taemin answered.

“No details. Don’t worry. But what is Minho’s role in all of this?”

“He was the one I spent the first night with.” The long-haired male admitted and Kibum’s eyes doubled in size.

“He did WHAT?”

“He actually dragged me out of my first customer’s car and payed that man money to let me leave with him.” As he said this out loud, he had to admit that the whole scene had been movie worthy. It sounded like a stupid romance story.

“Minho made you spend the night with him instead of that guy? Why?” Kibum was confused but impressed.

“Ask Minho if you want to know that.”

“So, he ACTUALLY payed you for sex?”

“Yes, he did.” Taemin answered, funnily enough that was the only night he was not ashamed of. It was also the only night where he hadn’t been left alone, spent on the bed, as soon as the client had reached their high.

“SUCH AN ASSHOLE. No wonder you two are so strange with each other!!” Kibum complained and was about to reach for his phone before Taemin stopped him.

“Don’t.”

“Why are you protecting him, he’s just some selfish rich dude that takes advantage of you! And I even let him live at our place. Why did you not say anything?!” Kibum was obviously mad, his eyes still a little puffy from previous crying.

“It’s complicated.” Taemin said, watching his hands as he played with his fingernails.

“Don’t tell me…” Kibum started as he watched Taemin blush, seeing his guess affirmed. “you like him, don’t you?”

“I-…”

“Gahhh” Kibum whined. “You are in deep shit Lee Taemin. REALLY deep shit.”

The following week, Taemin spent a lot of extra time at the club, teaching Gyutae to dance, helping him improve the choreo he had learned in such a rush. He wasn’t particularly well coordinated but he had a good feel for his body, so things looked halfway decent but more than anything else, he was very willing to learn and did his very best despite working at Erotes at night.

“I am so tired.” Gyutae moaned when they finished training around 8pm. He was lying on the floor of the studio, limbs stretched out with his eyes closed.

“You don’t sleep enough Gyutae-ya” Taemin said while brushing sweaty hair out of his face.

“I know. But you know how it works, Jonghyun-Hyung can’t just get me out of my contract that easily.”

Silence.

“When you quit the first time, what was in your contract?” Gyutae sat up, looking Taemin in the eyes.

“It stated that after quitting I would have to keep working for three months with just a 20% share.” The older answered, thinking back to when he had started working at the club while still being completely occupied with his clients at Erotes. It was probably the busiest and worst time of his life.

“Do you think it is the same for me?”

“You don’t know what is in your contract?!”

“I read it once, back when I signed it but honestly, I was drunk and desperate, so I barely skimmed over it.” Gyutae admitted.

“They didn’t give you a copy?”

“No…”

“These motherfuckers, I will destroy them.” Taemin growled while getting up from the floor.

“Hyung” Gyutae whined following the other’s example, also getting up. “Calm down.”

“I cannot calm down. Please, we need to get you out of there as soon as we can. This Thursday is my last night, I will talk to Junhwan and get your contract. I promise you.”

“Jonghyun-Hyung is already on that Hyung.”

“Oh. Yes right.” Taemin said, falling silent after his raging heart calmed down.

The conversation was pretty much over as Gyutae deep down was thankful for Taemin’s commitment.

Minho was emptying his first bottle of Soju. Not together with friends, not while he was in a club, not as he was at a party – While he was sitting on his apartment floor. Alone. It had been a long day, and throughout his lectures he dreaded the night.

The last Thursday night.

Last week he had resorted to drowning in self-despising thoughts to forget about the obvious, but after a whole week of doing so, there was nothing more to think about. He had come to the conclusion that he needed help. He never really worked through the great loss he suffered and after a few deep conversations with Jinki he had agreed, that looking for help in a professional would be necessary if he wanted to finally get a hold of his life again.

Instead, tonight his plan was drinking himself into oblivion so he could fall asleep as soon as possible without having to have his mind wandering places he didn’t want it to go.

There was no real bed yet, so after finishing off the second bottle, he had moved to the matrass on the floor to lean against the wall while he was looking outside and opening his third and last bottle of Soju. Being a little more emotional than usual, he cried softly for a few minutes before he got too tired to hold himself up properly and fell sideward onto the soft surface. The Soju bottle carefully placed on the floor, he curled into a ball, not even bothering to turn off the lights as he closed his eyes.

Minho’s head was pulsing, and he was so incredibly tired that he fell asleep not long after, finally getting over the last dreadful Thursday night.

That Thursday night, Kibum wasn’t feeling better either but he, at least, had Jinki whom he was currently snuggled up against. Kibum hadn’t explained the situation to the older in detail because he was sure that Taemin would hate it if anyone knew, and he wasn’t the kind of friend that destroyed the last bit of pride the latter had.

Nevertheless, the older had been really understanding and treated him extra soft, so Kibum once more was reminded how lucky he was to have Jinki by his side.

Without asking any questions, Jinki spent the whole evening with him in bed, just holding the raven-haired male who was pressing his body against his. From time to time the older would try to start a conversation, but the generic topics did not work to divert Kibum’s attention from whatever was bothering him.

Jinki thought about many things while silently holding the younger who was visibly distressed. Maybe it was time to bring up a topic that would get Kibum to participate in a conversation for sure.

“Do you think we could meet Sangyeon again sometime soon?” Jinki said softly as Kibum’s ears weren’t far away.

“Why?” The latter asked, looking up, meeting Jinki’s gentle gaze.

“I think I am ready to learn some more things.”

“You don’t have to.” Kibum answered.

“But I want to.” The older answered and didn’t leave any room for discussion. Kibum picked that up and gave in.

“What were you thinking of?” Finally, Kibum was properly taking part in the interaction.

“That’s what I wanted to ask you…” Jinki answered, glad he found a way to distract the younger.

“Me?”

“Yes, I want to know about things you enjoy the most so I can try those out and see if I like them too.”

Kibum was once more speechless and let his mind wander. There were so many things he enjoyed, and the spectrum of intensity was very big. It started with simple flogging and ended with intense pet play and humiliation. He wasn’t quite sure how his boyfriend would react to the harder preferences he had.

“Kibum?” Jinki’s voice interrupted his train of thought.

“Hm?”

“So?”

“I…” Kibum started, not quite knowing what to choose.

“Are you ashamed?” Apparently, to Jinki, Kibum was like an open book. “There is no need to be. Honestly, you have already told me the basics, so I won’t disappear if you let me know the details of what you enjoy doing in bed.”

“I am not ashamed of it per-se… It is just that I have been in the scene for quite a while and have had some very intense scenes over the years that I enjoyed a lot, but it is nothing for us to try. At least not for now. Trust me.”

“So then give me something we can do!”

Kibum was fascinated how Jinki didn’t even want to know what exactly he was talking about. If he was in the other’s shoes, he would be dying to know what he was talking about. But Jinki was different.

There was one thing he really wanted to teach the older: how to properly treat him as a submissive.

Yes, he had enjoyed their bondage sessions over the last weeks, but Jinki still treated him as an equal, as his boyfriend that he adored and wanted to please. He didn’t want to feel equal. Kibum wanted to let go completely, being taken care of by him, being used by him. He wanted to please him and enjoy the rush of being completely out of control.

“I want to show you how a dominant is supposed to treat his submissive.” Kibum said with clarity.

Jinki nodded. Thinking about what the raven-haired male just said. “Ok. So how will you teach me that?”

“I would rather show you.”

“How? You told me not to learn from porn…”

“I wasn’t talking about porn. If you are comfortable with it, I would contact Sangyeon and his current sub for a scene with us.”

Jinki looked surprised. “With us? You mean…?”

“Basically, what I mean is that THEY will be performing for us in a familiar setting.” Kibum kept explaining how it worked.

“It is a very common thing in the community to perform scenes for each other. And as far as I know Sangyeon’s new sub is very into exhibitionism so they would be up for it for sure.”

Jinki looked a little hesitant. “Uhm… so they are with us? What do we do?”

“We can decide on that after you are comfortable with the idea. The whole framework will be decided on by the four of us together prior to the scene. So, you won’t have to do or see anything you aren’t comfortable with.”

The conversation continued until deep into the night, Kibum slowly opening up about certain experiences he had made through the years while Jinki listened attentively.

Minho woke up with a huge hangover the next morning. It was over, he realised. Taemin was finally free.

Withstanding the immediate desire to text the younger, he decided to wait for the latter to text him first. He would let him take his time. To his surprise, it only took as long as two days until Taemin’s name turned up on his phone screen.

He was sitting in a café, studying by himself when the message arrived, and he almost choked on his iced-americano. Honestly, Minho didn’t have his hopes up high that Taemin would message him by himself. After such a long time of running after him, it was strange to have the long-haired male messaging him first, even more as he wasn’t much of a texter.

Can we meet?

Nothing more, just that. Of course, Minho wanted nothing more than to finally meet Taemin again. It had been over two weeks since he had last seen him. He quickly answered the message, letting Taemin know that he was studying at a café and adding the address of it so the latter could come and meet him there throughout the day.

From that moment on, he was unable to concentrate. The paragraphs he was supposed to learn barely kept his interest while his legs were fidgeting in anticipation.

“Is this seat taken?” A familiar voice asked, and Minho looked up to see the long-haired male looking down at him, pointing at the chair across from his table.

“I was actually waiting for someone.” Minho said, enjoying the small chuckle he evoked from Taemin who was taking the seat anyway.

“That someone will have to deal with me taking their seat.”

“I am sure he doesn’t mind.”

There was silence for a long moment. Neither of them quite knowing what to say. Finally, it was Taemin who broke the silence.

“How have you been?” He asked, not looking at Minho’s face.

“Do you want an honest answer?” The taller answered and Taemin finally looked at him, nodding. “I am going to get counselling to get over my family’s passing.”

It wasn’t what Taemin had expected to hear. Anything but this. It was so concrete, but more importantly it wasn’t connected to him. Taemin wasn’t sure what he thought Minho would answer but this definitely wasn’t anywhere near it. His reaction obviously gave it away;

“I know, probably not what you expected right?”

“Not really…”

“I have spent a lot of time thinking the past two weeks. About me, about them, and also about us. And honestly, the only thing I got at was how I have become a person my parents would be ashamed to see. The way I treated my life, the way I treated you, it isn’t what I have been taught. I don’t know what exactly had been the wake-up call but I am glad it happened.”

Taemin was speechless. He had always seen Minho as someone who was confident in who he was, and now he listened to the latter disclose his deepest struggles right in front of him.

“They wouldn’t be ashamed.” Taemin said “What you went through is something I don’t want to imagine, and you just haven’t yet found a way to cope with it. That’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Minho didn’t look convinced, but it didn’t matter. Hearing Taemin say that meant a lot and both of them knew it. There was silence once more. It wasn’t awkward. It was comfortable as they thought about what had been said.

It was Minho who spoke first this time.

“So, you are free now?”

Taemin nodded.

“What about us?” Minho asked, his heart beating as he spoke out the question both of them were carrying with them since that one morning.

“I don’t know. I have never done this.” Taemin admitted and it was now Minho’s turn to nod.

An uncomfortable silence laid between them until Taemin sighed.

“I was hoping you knew how to approach this. I… I just came up with one way to kick this off and it’s just not very appropriate…”

“Honestly, I don’t think there is an appropriate way for us.”

“Can I come over?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /N
> 
> This chapter was supposed to be the penultimate one, but after working over the whole story the last few weeks, I decided to properly finish it in 2 chapters. I still don't know exactly. But I am surely unable to connect all the open threads in just one chapter or else it would feel rushed.
> 
> I hope some of you are still here to read it when I finally finish the next chapter and the story.
> 
> xx
> 
> R
> 
> ps: I added a little OnKey scene in here as well, teasing a small compilation of OnKey BDSM adventures. If anyone is interested you can find it on my profile!


	26. A Dirty Game

“How about we cook a meal together?”

“That’s what you call inappropriate?” Minho answered and Taemin shrugged.

“I don’t know… It would include me coming over… But Kibum and I cook together regularly, it is relaxing and leaves a lot of time to talk.” Taemin looked at Minho while waiting for the answer that came soon enough.

“Ok sure. I don’t have anything at home though.”

“We can go and buy groceries on the way.”

“No, I mean like, I only have one pan for instant noodles and a bowl.” Minho admitted.

“Are you serious? Damn. Well…” Taemin didn’t know where to go from there. “Cup noodles then?”

“No, I think cooking is a good idea. Let’s stop by Daiso when we get the groceries.”

After they discussed what they were going to cook, the two of them left the café, a little awkward because they weren’t used to the new air around them. Were they a couple now? How do they have to act around each other?

In the grocery store Minho watched Taemin collecting all the ingredients they needed. It was a whole lot of different things: mushrooms, onions, spinach, soy sauce, sesame oil, pepper, sugar, carrots and sweet potato starch noodles. Of course, Minho didn’t let the dancer pay, he pulled out his credit card faster than Taemin could count to one when they finally reached the cashier.

In Daiso the whole thing repeated, Minho watching as Taemin chose a bowl, a frying pan and a knife plus cutting board. He then payed for the whole thing without blinking. It was for his apartment after all. There were many things still missing in his own place, he realised while walking the aisles. Minho made a mental note to get some necessities the next days such as a shower curtain and a vacuum cleaner.

“Wow you really have nothing.” Taemin said when he took off his shoes and entered the living room. The apartment looked empty, nothing in it besides the really necessary things. A chair, a small table and a rack for a few pairs of shoes. There was a matrass on the right side of the big room that reminded him of his own bed. A bottle of water was placed next to it, the blanket wrapped in a dark grey cover.

Across the bed on the other side of the decently sized empty room Taemin saw the kitchen that looked absolutely unused. 

“I haven’t been here that long…” was the only excuse Minho could think of and the dancer just shrugged it off.

Taemin instantly made himself at home and placed the bag of groceries on the floor in the kitchen and started unpacking right after. It was strange seeing the long-haired male in such a domestic scene but at the same time, Minho felt very comfortable seeing him like this. He seemed calmer, less worried while his small hands opened the bag of noodles.

“Come and help me cut the vegetables.”

“One might think this is your apartment.” Minho joked as he walked over to the table. Right behind it was his mostly un-used kitchen which a little later would be used by a very skilled cook, Lee Taemin.

While Minho was cutting the ingredients into uneven pieces, Taemin heated up water to boil the noodles and the spinach.

“You are a really great cook. Where did you learn this?” Minho asked while he worked on a really annoyingly shaped carrot.

“Mostly from Kibum. Ever since we started living together, I learned a lot from him. Before, I barely cooked anything other than Ramyeon.”

“That makes two of us then.”

“But quite honestly, cooking your own food is very satisfying. Now that you have a few utensils, you better use them in the future.” Taemin said with a soft smile.

“Or you could just cook for me every day.” Minho let slip and took it back right after when he saw Taemin’s face. “Too fast too soon?”

“A little.” The dancer said and took the cut carrots to fry them in the pan.

“I am sorry, I am a little too excited. Being with you like this, I have never imagined it would happen. It still blows my mind how we got here.” Minho admitted taking an onion in his hand to start cutting it into stripes the way Taemin had instructed him to.

“Oh boy, neither of us did and I am still not sure if we should do this. There are so many things between us, so many things in our lives, that I am just not sure if I can give you what you want.”

“I just want to get to know you better. And I am happy that you agreed to do so.” Minho admitted, tears forming in his eyes. “I have been overly annoying, and I did really crazy things to you. I am sorry. It is the first time I feel like this about someone and the fact that it is you doesn’t make things that much easier. Honestly if I were you, I would have punched me.”

By now, Minho’s big eyes were red and filled with tears.

“I am sorry I really can’t take you seriously like this.” Taemin chuckled as he looked at the sniffling male cutting onions. Right at that moment, Minho used his hand to brush away a tear on his lower eye lash line and before Taemin could tell him not to touch his eye, the latter already did and instantly closed his eye in pain.

“FUCK” he shouted and Taemin laughed.

“I was about to tell you not to touch your eye with those fingers.”

“Well, you were fucking late.” Minho groaned and walked over to the sink to drown his eye in a stream of water.

“Now you know…” Was Taemin’s only answer as he smiled a little at the other male who was currently showering his whole face, including his hair, underneath the tap.

When Minho’s eye stopped burning, Taemin had already cut up the rest of the vegetables and was currently boiling the spinach.

“Are you good now?” the dancer asked when Minho finally turned off the water.

“Never been better.” The latter answered, looking like a wet mess, his hair sticking to his forehead, the eye still bright red.

Cooking was fun, Minho noticed. At least it was with Taemin. The dancer was a lot more talkative while he was boiling noodles. It was quite refreshing to see him like this. When they were together, there usually was this heavy air around them, there were so many things that stained their relationship, so many things neither of them wanted to talk about but had to be spoken about at one point.

Tonight though, it felt good not to feel the need to talk about it. They spoke about things completely unconnected to them. Political issues, the environment and many other things. It turned out that they agreed on the basics but were able to argue about details for hours. Figuratively hours, because the food was done within an insanely short amount of time, considering they only had one pan.

“Let’s just sit on the floor.” Minho said while Taemin was mixing the noodles with the vegetables.

“Sure. I’ll be ready in a minute.” The latter said and Minho walked over to take care of their seating space. He took a blanket, placed it on the heated floor and filled a cup and a glass with water – as he only owned one of each – placing it on the floor right at the window.

“Dude, you don’t have anything. How are you still alive? Where do you have chopsticks?” Taemin asked after opening cabinet after cabined, finding nothing more than a few packs of ramyeon and emptieness.

“Oh.” Minho said, confusing Taemin.

“What?”

“I only have one set of chopsticks. They should be to your left.”

“Are you serious? You didn’t think of that sooner? We’ll have to share these then.” Taemin said while opening every single drawer to his left, of course it was in the last one he checked.

When Taemin came over, he was holding the bowls and the pair of chopsticks Minho owned. Careful not to spill anything, the dancer sat down on the floor right next to the awaiting male who grabbed the bowl when it was handed to him.

“You actually have a decent view.” Taemin commented when he looked out of the window.

“I am a rich asshole, don’t you remember?”

“If I didn’t know the place your grandparents live in, I would call you crazy. No offence but your apartment is not even equipped to hold two people. It’s almost embarrassing.” Taemin gave back with raised eyebrows.

“Excuse you? You wanted to come over. The guest may not complain.”

“I am not complaining, I am just saying that maybe you should invest in some additional plates and maybe a proper bed.”

“What are you suggesting here?” Minho teased and Taemin instantly regretted what he said.

“I am not suggesting anything. I just-“ Taemin couldn’t even finish the sentence because the taller interrupted him.

“Does that mean you will be coming over again?”

“I didn’t say that”

“But you said to buy more plates.”

“Not for me, I am sure you have other people you can invite over.”

“What if I don’t want other people over?” Minho said and smirked.

“Let’s eat.” Taemin said, tired of the conversation because he knew where it was going.

“Too much?”

“Yeah…”

They were quiet for a few minutes, eating one after another because there was only one pair of chopsticks. While they were eating, the city outside lit up slowly while the sun set. It was quite beautiful to see and Taemin, rather than looking at Minho, was watching the change attentively.

Minho on the other hand couldn’t take his eyes off Taemin. The latter looked different. Today, once more, he had been confronted with a completely different, domestic side, of the dancer and he loved it. Partially he had felt this Taemin coming through while they had been hanging clothes on their rooftop. But seeing him sitting on his floor, eating the food he had prepared earlier was different. The feeling between them was different. It was a lot more relaxed. Both knew the other also had no clue what was going to come for them in the future.

“Minho?” Taemin said, turning his head around.

“Yes?”

“Can we take this slow?” he asked, placing his bowl between them.

“It’s what we are doing right now, aren’t we?”

“I just want to make sure…” Taemin replied, looking at his hands.

That moment he felt warm. So warm that he didn’t want to lose the feeling by doing something stupid. It had been ages since he felt safe like this, he wasn’t sure if it ever felt like this before. His life had been ups and downs ever since he could remember and even the ups didn’t feel like this. Just looking out of the window, feeling another person’s presence next to him felt good. It didn’t matter that they were sitting on the floor. Their past didn’t matter either. Strangely enough, in this moment, none of the troubles they went through were in the back of his mind. It was fresh, it felt nice.

Taemin knew that his life was anything but perfect, but he knew that Minho’s wasn’t either. They both had their issues and didn’t judge the other for theirs.

“So what are we?” Minho asked softly, hoping he didn’t overstep any boundaries. “You said we would try after everything is over. Did you mean that?”

“I can no longer pretend I don’t have feeling for you, and I know you have feelings for me too. The only logical thing would be to get together, start a relationship. Isn’t that how it goes? Honestly, I am just not sure if I can give you what you are looking for…” Even though it was obvious Taemin wasn’t done, Minho asked a follow-up question:

“And what do you think I am looking for?” he interrupted the younger who thought for a second before answering.

“A relationship. You are looking for someone to go on dates with, someone to have sex with, someone to spend your time with.”

“Can I be honest?”

“Please.”

“I don’t really care for the typical relationship – I don’t have any idea how to be in a healthy relationship. You are not the only one who hasn’t properly been in love before. Looking back on all the women I shared my bed with, none of them really had my heart. I know that I found something different in you. I don’t think I am looking for anything…”

“Since when were you so poetic? If this had been a line in a movie, I would have turned it off.” Taemin gave back, to play off the seriousness of Minho’s words.

“I had to get chicks into my bed somehow, one does pick up on some tricks.” Without thinking twice, Taemin hit him on the shoulder.

“You fucking donkey.”

“A donkey? Really?”

“Shut up. We were having a good talk.” Taemin said, bringing the mood back down. He should have known that interrupting the flow with a cocky answer wouldn’t be good – Minho would not let it slide.

“You started it.”

“Where do we go from here?” Taemin asked and Minho put his, by now empty, bowl to the side.

“You said you wanted to take it slow. Are you referring to the emotional or sexual part?”

“Both…” Taemin admitted. “I did a lot of thinking the last weeks. And I don’t think I want to have sex.”

Minho’s eyes grew bigger. No sex? He had expected Taemin to take everything slow, he had hinted on that before. But the thought of him not wanting to have sexual intercourse didn’t come to him even for a second.

“If that is a deal breaker for you, I can leave right now.” The dancer said. He had known that it wouldn’t be an easy pill to swallow for Minho, but he still hoped he could understand and accept it. Maybe he should elaborate? Before he could start explaining though, Minho spoke:

“You’ll have to stay then.”

“You don’t want to know why?” Taemin wondered, surprised by the other’s fast acceptance of such a huge thing.

“That would have been my next question.” Minho admitted and the younger started to talk.

“I don’t know how to have sex with someone I have feelings for. To be honest, I have never connected sex to something meaningful. It has never been something that made me feel good. I see it as a task, a task that has to be completed, something necessary - work. That’s not how I want it to be with you. The times I did it with you were different but made me feel even worse afterwards. I don’t want to feel like that again.” Taemin said, turning around to rest his back against the window, Minho following his example only seconds later before he asked a question.

“How did you feel after having sex with me?”

“I…”

“No wait I don’t want to know.” Minho said, eyes clearly showing the hurt he felt by that thought.

“I am sorry… I am messed up. I know it. I know now, that I don’t want to feel like this again. I want to have sex with you and be happy. I want to feel the way Kibum feels when he sleeps with Jinki.” He was staring at the white of the ceiling while he spoke. His voice getting softer with each sentence he said. “And that’s why I don’t want to have sex with you. Not now. Not in the near future. Hell, I can’t even promise you that I will ever get this feeling to leave. I am so sorry.”

By now, Taemin’s eyes were filled with tears even though there were no onions around. This made Minho nudge closer. The taller put his arm around Taemin’s shoulders, holding onto his arm softly.

“Don’t be sorry. I don’t want you to have sex with me just because you feel like you have to. I don’t want you to feel bad afterwards. And also, there is a lot of porn out there and my hand will do the job. Pretty sure.”

Taemin turned his head to look at Minho who looked back into his eyes. They were dangerously close, and Minho felt the younger move away just a bit, separating their hips which had been touching before.

“You’ll need a lot of patience.”

“I have been waiting for you for a while now, haven’t I?” Minho gave back, taking his arm back off Taemin’s shoulder.

“You are an impatient person. Don’t try to pretend you are not.”

“We both knew this wouldn’t be easy.”

“We haven’t even properly started, and it is a mess already.” Taemin said, chuckling slightly. At this point there wasn’t much between them that could bring the mood down. They were so painfully aware that this is hard that the only way to get this to work would be facing it heads on, and also a tiny bit of humour.

“Alright, so no sex. I got that. Anything else before we get to my terms?”

“Don’t expect me to change my life for you.”

Minho nodded.

“Good. That’s my call as well. I don’t need anyone else telling me what I can or can’t do. The weeks we didn’t see each other, I thought about us a lot and I don’t want you to be in my life and me be in your life. I want us to live our own lives and meet in the middle, building one together. Does that make sense? I don’t know… I could draw it for you.” Minho was talking fast and a little disconnected but Taemin understood either way.

Minho didn’t want either of them to invade the other’s life, he didn’t want to build one big life together. He wanted to keep up their own lives while adding a new circle in the middle where they would build a life they could share. Taemin had never before thought about it that way but now as he did, he was sure that it was exactly what he wanted from this relationship as well. He wanted to be with Minho, he wanted to share his life with him. But at the same time, he didn’t want to give up his own life, no matter how shitty it might be, it was still his life and there were many things he was proud of. His friendship with Kibum, his work at the club, helping out Gyutae. There were many parts that needed improvement but for the first time in his life he was optimistic that he could work towards a better future.

“Nonono I understand. Thank you.” Taemin said, smiling a little. It was nice to hear that Minho had thought about their relationship equally as much as – if not even more than – him. “That sounds good to me.”

“You are amazing.” Minho said, looking at Taemin with dilated pupils.

“Shut up.”

“I cannot touch you, now I am not allowed to make compliments either? So, what CAN I do?”

“I never said you can’t touch me.” Taemin answered.

“Sorry, I am not following.”

“I said I don’t want to have sex with you. That doesn’t mean you can’t touch me. I just don’t want to be in a sexual relationship with you. Not until I figure it out.”

“Does that mean I can hold your hand?” Taemin nodded. “Can I kiss you?” The second question was asked with more hesitance.

“Not yet.” Was Taemin’s short answer and instead of looking disappointed, Minho’s hand reached for Taemin’s and intertwined their fingers softly.

“Ok. Fair.”

There was a moment of silence between them because Minho’s thumb started caressing the back of the dancer’s hand and the latter was watching it closely.

“You know what?” the taller asked.

“hmm?”

“I feel like a virgin right now.”

“Okay?” Taemin chuckled at Minho’s bluntness.

“I am not a virgin though.”

“I wouldn’t mind if you were.” Taemin admitted and smirked.

“Sorry to disappoint.”

They sat in that position for a while longer. Backs pressed against the cold glass of the window, not even bothering to look at the beautiful view. Their hands were not leaving each other and were comfortably put on Minho’s thigh while they were talking. Now that both were on the same page, they moved on to other topics; Taemin briefly talking about his history with foster families and Minho on the other hand telling him about his sister.

Taemin was quite surprised to know how close the two had been. To him, the concept of siblings had always been connected with fights and jealousy, because those were the experiences he had with brothers and sisters. In all five families he had been with, the siblings envied him or pitied him, there wasn’t much room for late-night talks and building towers out of blocks together.

Listening to Minho talking about his younger sister was bittersweet. He spoke about her so lively that no one would guess that she had passed already. Knowing it though, gave everything a darker touch.

“You said you were going to get counselling?” Taemin asked at one point.

“It is long overdue. I don’t know why I wasn’t pressured into it before.”

“You probably were but didn’t listen.”

“Highly plausible.” Minho admitted and continued. “It just doesn’t feel fair if you are working on yourself so hard and I am not. I won’t compare my pain to your pain. That would be impossible. But I guess this is something you made me realize…”

“I did?”

“Yes… You admitted your issues. I never did. I just tried to push them away and lived too hard.”

“Boy I barely accepted my problems. Do you see me working out my issues? I don’t think so.” Taemin shrugged his shoulders.

“I didn’t say you accepted them, but you admitted them.”

The sky outside got darker as they talked and the city lit up even more, the sounds of the street below them making it into the apartment just softly.

Taemin had to admit that he didn’t want to go home. So, when the time came and Minho asked, he answered the following:

“Would you mind it if I stayed the night?”

Minho looked like he had seen a ghost.

“You want to stay over? I don’t even have a proper bed.”

“I don’t have one either. Remember? You slept in it once after passing out.” Taemin smirked.

“Don’t remind me.”

“Sorry, but now seriously, do you mind me staying over?”

“I absolutely do NOT mind you staying over. In fact, I would enjoy your company. This place gets quite lonely.”

Together, they cleaned up the kitchen – it barely took five minutes because there was nothing to clean. Taemin was handed a clean shirt and some trainers which he changed into right then and there, making the older lose his mind for a second.

“You are making this really hard for me.” Minho said while staring at Taemin’s naked torso. The owl circling his nipple was just as beautiful as he remembered. One day he really wanted to look at Taemin’s tattoos in detail. Luckily, he had put on the trainers first because otherwise the tattoos wouldn’t have been the object of interest. “How about you warn me next time?”

“How about you look away?”

“How about you put on a fucking shirt before we argue.”

“How about we don’t argue but go to bed instead?” Taemin said, ending the bicker.

They both brushed their teeth, luckily Minho had bought new ones when he moved in – the brushes coming in packs of two made it possible for Taemin to use the spare one.

Being together like this was still strange. It reminded Taemin of the night they spent by the sea. He remembered their talks as if it were yesterday. How Minho opened up about his family while both of them were laying in the dark, the only thing audible being each other’s voices and the occasional ruffling of the sheets.

“When do you have to get up tomorrow?” Minho asked as he was setting the alarm on his phone.

“Around nine?”

“Sounds good to me. My lecture starts at noon.” The taller replied and put his phone on the floor next to the matrass, laying down on it shortly after.

Taemin was just standing in the middle of the room awkwardly. He hadn’t quite thought this through. Why did it feel so strange to share the bed with Minho? They had made it clear that nothing sexual would happen. Still he hadn’t slept in someone’s bed before – excluding the one time when Minho had mistaken his room for Kibum’s and back then the situation was a whole lot different.

Now, both of them were completely sober, completely aware of what was happening. It was a big step. Taemin wasn’t sure if he could already take it.

“Are you ok?” Minho asked as he noticed how hesitant Taemin was.

“It’s just a big step.” The long-haired male answered, and Minho just lifted the sheets.

“the biggest step was when you sent me a message. This is just a consequence of it.”

Taemin had to admit that Minho was incredibly good at turning things around until they were just as he wanted them to be. He also knew that he was right, because it had taken him several days to send a message to the older. Counting the amount of times he typed something into his old phone and then deleting it again, was almost impossible.

As strange as it felt, Taemin finally moved closer and sat on the mattress where Minho was waiting for him to lie down. Just the view confused Taemin. All his life he had spent in a bed alone, no one waiting for him with a smile on their face.

“Let’s not make a big deal out of this.” he said when he laid down.

“I am not doing anything.” Minho answered shrugging his shoulders while smiling softly.

Unable to look at Minho while he laid in bed, Taemin turned to his other side, looking at the kitchen instead of the handsome man next to him. The older did not comment on it and shortly turned off the light before pulling up the blanket over their bodies. He didn’t come closer, staying as far away from Taemin’s body as it was possible on the matrass.

Their breathing slowed down as they pretended to fall asleep. Truth was that neither of them could. Too many thoughts were running through their minds, too many things happened today, to many things were talked about and most importantly just the sheer presence of the other person’s hot body made it impossible to relax.

After Minho turned around for the fifth time, Taemin was sure the other was still awake.

“Can’t sleep?” He said in a soft voice. It was clearly audible due to the silence in the room.

“Not really. No…”

“I have never slept in someone else’s bed before…” Taemin admitted.

“It can be quite unsettling.”

There was another minute of silence until Minho spoke again.

“Can I brush your hair to the side?”

Taemin was confused, why was the other suddenly talking about his hair? What was with it? Curious to what the older’s issue was, he turned around, now facing Minho, his head incredibly close to his own. The darkness in the room though, made it impossible to see more than a few shades and forms.

“huh?”

“Your hair was all over the pillow, sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Oh. – No, - don’t worry.” Taemin said, a little surprised. He had never thought about his hair getting in the way.

With his hands he pulled the hair back, to get it out of the way properly.

“Can I ask you a question?” Minho asked while watching the younger.

“Sure.” The latter answered, placing a hand between his cheek and the pillow to hold himself up a little higher.

“If you don’t like people touching your hair, why don’t you just cut it off?”

“Would that keep people from touching it though? I am not so sure…”

“I certainly would be less tempted to touch it.” Minho admitted.

“You want to touch my hair?”

Taemin never quite understood what people’s obsession with his hair seemed to be. He kept it long for two reasons: to hide behind it and because of his stage-persona. As a performer, he had made himself a name and with that name came the long hair. He didn’t even know what Jonghyun would say if he suddenly cut it off. It wasn’t impossible that he would have to wear a wig from that day on. Something Taemin really didn’t want to do.

“Are you seriously asking that question?” Minho said, and the dancer guessed he was rolling his eyes. Due to the lack of lighting he couldn’t make out anything.

“One day.” Taemin just answered, hoping he could make that step in the future.

“Why do you hate people touching your hair so much?”

Taemin didn’t answer right away and Minho instantly felt as if he overstepped a boundary.

“Sorry, you don’t have to answer that.”

“Thank you.”

Both were quiet, listening to each other’s breathing once more. Just that now, they were facing each other. Despite not being able to make out the other’s face, Taemin felt Minho’s breath on his face which suggested the latter being close. Very close. It was a gradual process and at one point, the dancer’s arm was placed on Minho’s side.

The moment Taemin’s arm touched his body, Minho held his breath. He couldn’t quite believe what was happening. Afraid to provoke Taemin into pulling away again if he said something, he stayed completely still. Not moving, not saying anything.

After a few minutes Taemin moved closer, his arm now wrapping itself around Minho’s shoulders while his hand was softly caressing the spot between his shoulder blades.

Due to Minho’s unresponsiveness the whole position felt very unnatural, he was lying there like a stick, not daring to move. There were many thoughts occupying his mind. He revisited their past, how he first saw Taemin at the gate of the University. He remembered Taemin dancing at Jinki’s birthday party. He remembered the sleepless nights after he slept with Taemin. Nights of uncertainty, nights of curiosity, anxious nights. After meeting Taemin many things had changed, especially how he saw himself.

Most of the memories passed in a hurry and he ended up on the beach. While trying to remember their conversations, Taemin pulled him closer by the head, Minho’s face now placed against his upper chest. Their hearts were beating fast and Minho was ripped out of his memories. Instead of thinking about how Taemin told him he’s not a flower that has to be taken care of, he found himself being the one held close. Not speaking a word, he let Taemin do whatever he pleased and even if it took a while, the younger grew bolder, starting to run his fingers through Minho’s hair.

Taemin didn’t know why he pulled Minho closer. He did it without a second thought just because it felt right. Having Minho breathing on his chest felt good. It felt right.

He liked having control over touches. He could decide when to get closer, he could pull back whenever he wanted to. Minho was just following his lead without trying to touch him. Taemin wasn’t sure if the older did it consciously, knowing that it would make it easier for him to handle the situation, or if he just did it in fear of driving him away otherwise. Either way Taemin was able to take it on at his pace.

Since neither of them was able to sleep anyway, they had all the time in the world. And it took a while until Taemin took a hold of Minho’s arm, wrapping it around his waist. By now, their lower bodies were touching, one of Taemin’s arm underneath Minho’s head, the latter’s nose buried in his neck while the dark hair tickled the dancer’s nose. His second arm was tightly hugging Minho’s upper body. Never in his life had he ever held someone close like this.

Minho felt like crying when Taemin reached for his hand, placing it on his waist. Was he allowing him to touch him? He had no idea how much this could mean for the younger. So many things had happened today and despite everything he would have never guessed the day would end like this. Especially after Taemin told him about his feelings regarding sexual actions, he had expected it to apply to touching in general. The fact that Taemin held him in his arms and was even allowing him to touch him as well was something he had never expected.

To some extent he was happy, to some extent he felt unworthy of touching Taemin’s body while he was still feeling so bad about being touched. He didn’t want him to pressure himself into physical contact just because Taemin believes that it is what he expects. But as much as he wanted to pull away to give the younger space, he wanted to stay in his arms forever. He couldn’t remember anyone holding him like this except for his mother when he was younger. It wasn’t something grown-ups did in his experience.

At some point both of them fell asleep while listening to the sound of their breathing mixing.

“Good morning.” Minho said when he felt Taemin wake up as the alarm rang. He had been awake for a while but getting up was the last thing he wanted to do, waking up Taemin following right afterwards. Watching the dancer sleep would have been creepy, so instead, he closed his eyes again, enjoying the warmth that radiated from his body.

Somewhen during the night, they had let go of each other but Taemin seemed to be a messy sleeper, so despite them not hugging each other anymore, the dancer’s limbs were spread all over. One of his legs was placed on Minho’s and one of his hands was placed on the floor next to the matrass. While his head was turned unnaturally looking in Minho’s direction.

Taemin groaned and Minho took that as a demand to turn off the fucking alarm. Without thinking twice, he moved towards the phone, bending over Taemin’s body to reach it. When the annoying sound was finally off, they found themselves in a highly awkward position, Minho’s chest touching Taemin’s, his face not far from the dancer’s.

“Sorry.” He immediately said, hurrying off the younger’s body. The latter just shrugged it off and sat up.

“How did you sleep?” Minho tried to get Taemin to talk but the latter just nodded.

“Not a morning person I take it?”

“Not at all. I’ll wash up first.” The long-haired male said, trying to sort out the mess on his head with his fingers.

Minho heard his shower turn on while he leaned against the wall as he sat on the bed trying to make sense of the whole situation.

Everything was so foreign. Waking up next to Taemin felt shockingly distant. Minho realised he barely knew the man. He didn’t know his routines, he didn’t know anything about his habits, he didn’t know his personality. As much as he knew about the big things in Taemin’s live, he was clueless about the small things.

“Can I get one of your shirts? I will give it back to you.” Minho heard Taemin say and turned around.

The said male was standing in the middle of the room, wearing nothing but a towel around his hips, the long, wet hair brushed backwards, and Minho noticed he had never before seen Taemin’s forehead. He looked absolutely gorgeous and he needed all his energy to stop staring at his face and answer the question.

“Sure.” Minho mumbled while his eyes were scanning Taemin’s body.

“Can you give me one?” The dancer asked when Minho didn’t make any move to get up and give him a shirt.

“Oh yes sure.”

“Thanks.” Taemin smirked. He knew it wasn’t fair to tease Minho like this, especially because he wasn’t going to be intimate with him for a while. But at the same time, he loved to make the usually collected male lose his cool.

“You are aware that you are playing a dirty game here.” The older mumbled while taking a shirt from the stack. “I hope you are also aware that it isn’t a one-sided game.” He threatened and Taemin chuckled.

“I’ll be waiting for your turn then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> I am not sorry for the misleading title. to those who expected the nasty: I am a little sorry. I must have completely shattered your dreams with this chapter.
> 
> They will experience a real first time together one day. It won't be within the original story though. I found it highly unfitting and decided to add a small sequel when this is done. I hope you can understand.
> 
> BUT on the bright side, I am finally going to finish this story. As mentioned before, there have been changes made in the story, so if something feels unfamiliar, it is because I completely worked over previous chapters. There will be one more chapter if everything goes as planned.
> 
> I hope you can comment and give me a last motivational boost so I can actually finish this story at one point.  
> \--> If you want to be updated on the process come around to my Twitter (AIMRWV) I try to keep y'all updated there!


	27. He Doesn't Know Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N  
> This is the first part of the double update.  
> I am posting both chapters at once because it is what people on Twitter decided on!
> 
> It does have a sad side effect for me as a writer though: People tend to not comment on the first chapter of a double update. I know I may be asking for too much but please do consider commenting on this chapter before reading the second one! I have been working on these chapters since March which makes it over half a year and comments (+upvotes) are the only kind of appreciation I can get.  
> Wow this sounds so needy. I am sorry.
> 
> Have fun reading! <3

“You are aware that you are playing a dirty game here.” The older mumbled while taking a shirt from the stack. “I hope you are also aware that it isn’t a one-sided game.” He threatened and Taemin chuckled.

“I’ll be waiting for your turn then.”

Taemin didn’t have to wait for Minho’s move for too long. Just the very next time he visited the taller’s place, he almost walked away when the door opened. Minho was standing there completely naked, looking a lot more muscular in the daylight than at night. The dancer instantly felt his blood boil as he stared at the older’s body, not even pretending to be subtle about it.

“Are you not coming in?” Minho asked, turning around while showing off his bare behind. Taemin had to swallow thickly and pulled his gaze off the naked frame that attracted his attention like a magnet. He needed a few seconds to collect himself and took off his shoes in a haste.

“Good move. What’s it like to be so big and so strong and so buff?” Taemin tried to hide his insecurity behind a dumb quote from some song he was currently choreographing and walked behind the naked male.

“Hmmm… It’s hard to explain.” Minho answered despite knowing it was a rhetorical question. The decision to take it a step further, he knew was a bad one, but he made it anyway. “Wanna touch?” he offered without even turning around.

“hmmm” Taemin mouthed and hugged the naked male from behind, pressing his cheek against Minho’s hot shoulder. It didn’t take long until Taemin was all over him. The dancer was lacking self-control even more than Minho and they ended up heavily making out in Minho’s entrance, the taller completely naked except for a towel around his neck.

To be fair, Taemin could not have possibly foreseen him opening the door in all his naked glory but in the end that didn’t matter. What mattered was that they almost crossed the line they had sworn to not come near.

The dancer was the first to snap back into reality. The moment he felt Minho’s dick poke his belly, the taller already completely erect hoping for more, he knew that they had to stop. An uncomfortable air surrounded them and Taemin’s mind only saw the worst of all possible outcomes. 

“Shit.” He mumbled while pulling away reluctantly. “I am sorry. You surprised me.”

Minho moaned; his eyes heavy lidded, barely open. It was a moan of displeasure and Taemin hated to hear it. He wanted this. So much, that it almost physically hurt to pull away, but he needed to. Protecting himself was suddenly first priority.

Taemin didn’t even notice the tears that formed in his eyes until he tried to focus on Minho’s face to apologize properly and was only able to make out blurred shapes that only vaguely resembled the taller’s handsome face. Words just started coming out when he realised the state he was in.

“I really want this Minho. I really do. I just can’t do this yet.” He sobbed, covering his eyes with his hands. “I am such a mess. I…” The tears wouldn’t stop coming and he leaned against the door, barely able to keep himself upright as his body shook through the soft sobs. “It was me who started it even.” Another sob. “Why can’t I just turn it off?”

Taemin let himself sink down, squatting so far down until he was able to comfortably sit as he hugged his knees and buried his face in his arms. How long he stayed in that position was hard to tell. It could have been seconds but could also have been minutes. His mind was processing so many thoughts at the same time that he failed to take in anything that happened around him.

The next thing Taemin registered was that he was gently pulled up into Minho’s arms. Minho who was wearing clothes. The long-haired male had no idea when he had put on the sweats and shirt, but he instantly calmed down as he felt Minho’s strong arms holding him softly. There was no pressure, just the comfort of Minho’s scent and warmth.

The older didn’t say anything he just held him, slowly patting his back to reassure him of his presence.

“I hope you know this wasn’t what I wanted to happen.” Minho said softly after a few more minutes and Taemin nodded into his chest.

“I know. I am sorry for making it turn out this way.” Taemin said, not wanting to leave the taller’s embrace.

“How about we grab something to eat? You must be hungry.” The latter said, trying to move the conversation to an easier topic.

Despite knowing it was time to let go, Taemin stayed in his position for a few more seconds before taking a deep breath and nodding in approval.

“I am. Today was a long day.” He admitted and sighed as he thought back to the amount of dancing he had done that day while teaching a choreography he had made for the anniversary of the club. He wasn’t originally going to be free tonight, but Jonghyun was ecstatic when he saw what Taemin had worked on for the past week and shortly decided to give him the night off.

Going home wasn’t really an option because Kibum had Jinki over. His friend had instructed him to come home late – for reasons he didn’t want to state, but Taemin didn’t even want to know. Therefore, the only reasonable place to spend the evening was at Minho’s place. The latter had answered the unexpected message with an enthusiastic “Come over anytime” and just an hour later, Taemin was standing in front of the door, waiting for it to be opened by the naked man inside.

“Jajjangmyeon?” Minho asked and Taemin agreed instantly.

Half an hour later, the deliveryman knocked on the door of the small apartment, handing Minho, who opened the door, the plastic bag with two bowls of black-bean noodles inside.

“It’s so goood!” Taemin moaned while slurping the slippery noodles up as if his life depended on it.

“How long have you not had Jajjangmyeon?” the taller then teased, highly amused by Taemin’s enthusiastic eating.

“Too long.” The latter just answered as he kept stuffing his face with black noodles.

Instead of eating, Minho was watching the younger for most of the time, enjoying how much the latter seemed to like the food. It being Jajjangmyeon, resulted in a whole mess as it was impossible to eat the dish fast without smearing the black paste all over your face. For a few seconds, Minho contemplated if he should just wipe Taemin’s mouth, but he figured that wasn’t the best idea. Provoking a situation like earlier he surely didn’t want.

“You have a little something on your face.” He said instead, pointing at Taemin’s black chin. “Should I wipe it off for you?”

“Who do you think you are? My boyfriend?” Taemin joked before realising what he said was actually true. His eyes widened and he instantly regretted what he said but taking it back was impossible.

“As a matter of fact, I am.” Minho replied after he had gotten over the first shock.

“Don’t say that again.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Just don’t say anything.” Taemin said, watching his almost empty bowl of food. “Don’t you want to eat?” he then added, pointing at Minho’s bowl who was still almost full.

“Whatever you say Lee Taemin” Minho mumbled and started eating.

Of course, Taemin was done way before the older was even halfway done and to fill the awkward silence around them, he just randomly started telling Minho about the preparations for the anniversary. He hadn’t had the possibility to explain it to him in detail until now, despite it being the only thing that was actually happening in his life at the moment. The reason for him not talking about it when he was in Minho’s presence had been the fact that he hadn’t been planning to invite the taller to the event. Talking about it and then not inviting him was very much of a dick move.

It turned out though, that he didn’t have much of a choice this time. Taemin took a deep breath, pulling himself together to utter a question, he never thought he would ask:

“Do you want to come to the performance that night?” Taemin said, surprising the other.

“Why are you inviting me?”

“If you don’t want to, never mind.” The long-haired male said, shrugging. He knew exactly that Minho would give anything to be there. He still remembered the latter’s face from every single time he had refused to let him come to a show.

“I want to!” The latter said in a hurry, then continued in a calmer manner: “But why the sudden change of heart? I thought you didn’t want me at the club?”

Taemin had had many reasons not to invite Minho to the club. He was afraid that Minho would be disgusted, maybe he would be reminded that there was a completely different side to him. Deep down he knew it was nonsense because the older was more than aware of the way he made his money but the sheer thought of him watching as he was dancing on stage was unbearable.

He knew he was a good dancer, but him, half-naked in front of a room of horny men wasn’t exactly something that he wanted the man he liked to see. Even less now, that they decided to give their relationship a chance. There was so much to lose.

The real reason why he suddenly invited him, he couldn’t share. It had been Kibum who basically held a knife to his throat out of anger when he had told him he wouldn’t invite Minho to the party.

“Are you fucking insane? I will be bringing Jinki. You can’t just not invite Minho?! He’s your boyfriend, you can’t just forbid him to go. He’s gonna be so hurt!”

“He’s not my boyfriend…” Taemin had answered but it was as unconvincing as his previous arguments.

“You have such a twisted view on the world Lee Taemin. I don’t want to invade your business, but I know more than well that to Minho this is a lot deeper than you probably realise. So, get your shit together or I will invite him.”

Taemin was about to say something when he was interrupted once more: “Don’t tell me I can just bring one plus one. I am fully aware. But you are just as aware that Jonghyun can’t say no to me. Man up and ask your boyfriend to come to your performance.”

“Can you stop calling Minho my boyfriend?” Taemin said, stumbling over the word he despised.

“No.”

Keeping Minho out of the event was impossible and following Kibum’s advice, he found it the preferable option to invite him himself. He wasn’t a coward. He just didn’t want Minho there. But that was something the taller male should never ever know. It would crush him, that was something Taemin was sure of.

“Do you want to come or not?” he said, having no intentions to answer any questions Minho asked.

“I do. But – “ Taemin interrupted him:

“Good. I’ll put you on the guest list.”

Finally, the older seemed to give up and they finished their dishes in silence. Taemin didn’t stay over that night as both were unsure how it would go if he did. Instead the younger left around midnight, hoping Kibum and Jinki were done with whatever plans they had for the night. – Turns out they weren’t.

As Taemin laid in his bed while trying to ignore the sounds coming from Kibum’s room, he thought about Minho. Ever since they got together three weeks ago, he had gotten a whole new image of the older male who had always had such a strong and controlled aura, none of his insecurities showing.

Minho wasn’t doing well mentally. Before, he had never paid much attention to it, but the more steps Minho made towards him, the more did the long-haired male see behind the façade of the supposedly strong individual. Also, today as Taemin had left the older’s place, he could feel the latter tremble a little as they hugged goodbye – the hug lasting almost a minute making it possible for the dancer to even notice.

Minho seemed to be especially troubled at night as there had been several times when Taemin had taken the taller’s call as he was waiting for his turn to get on stage.

The first time it happened, it was shortly past midnight, and Taemin originally didn’t want to accept the call as he was trying to get into the mood for the performance. He took it anyway and didn’t regret doing so for even a second. 

“Do you have a minute?” were the older’s first words when Taemin took the call and the latter answered it truthfully.

“I gotta be on stage in ten… Everything alright?” The question he added when he thought he made out a soft sob through the speaker of the phone, unsure if he heard wrong.

“I just feel so alone.” Minho said with a trembling voice and now it was obvious that he had been crying. “I know you can’t come. I just needed to hear your voice.”

Taemin’s heart started beating faster. Not because of the upcoming performance but because Minho was showing him this vulnerable side of him. Usually the older tried to be the one supporting him and to this point Taemin had always felt as if he couldn’t give anything back to Minho. That night was different. That night, Minho was looking for help, not offering his own. And Taemin was glad to give it his all.

Until the very second before he had to walk through the curtain, Taemin was on the phone gently talking to Minho who hadn’t said anything since those first few sentences. Despite the lack of reaction he was getting, he just kept talking about his day and random things to make sure he was able to give the man on the other side of the line what he needed: to make him feel less alone.

For the following dance routine, the dancer was barely in the desired mood, finishing the performance only half-heartedly, hoping to get Minho on the phone as soon as he was done. His turns weren’t well executed, his hands were trembling as he held onto the pole to the point where he had to slightly alter the choreography so that he wouldn’t fall.

There had been two more nights like that. They passed similarly, just that the next week, Minho didn’t fall asleep while he was on the phone with him.

“Can I ask you something?” Taemin asked one night as he was walking out of the club a little earlier than usual.

“Sure.” Minho answered and the dancer took a tight hold on his old phone, preparing himself mentally to ask the question that had been troubling his mind for a while. He was unsure how the other would react to it. If there was one thing he was sure about, it was that he would not want to be asked about it if he were in Minho’s situation. He kept the question back ever since their first late-night call and came to a point where he just had to know.

“For the past years, did you also struggle like this?” Taemin fished for the pack of cigarettes in his jacket, lighting one as he waited for Minho to answer. After a few seconds of silence, he was starting to worry that Minho might hang up on him. He couldn’t afford just calling him back and he doubted that Minho would call if he sent him a text message.

“Sorry for asking. You don’t have to answer. Sorry. I was getting ahead of myself.” The long-haired male then said, exhaling a huge cloud of white smoke.

“I did.” Was Minho’s simple answer, completely ignoring the apology Taemin had uttered shortly before. There were another ten seconds of silence before Taemin could make out a sigh through the line.

“You don’t have to tell me.” He then repeated when Minho didn’t continue. “Just don’t hide it anymore. Please.” Taemin almost begged – something he never did. “I am here for you. Ok? Don’t struggle by yourself anymore.”

The connection broke off, the last sound that made it to Taemin’s ear being a soft sob. Despite being exhausted from the week and especially tonight’s performance, the dancer didn’t hesitate to choose Minho’s place over his own.

When he finally arrived at the still unfamiliar apartment block, he tried to get the taller to open up but despite the uncountable tries to ring the bell, Minho didn’t seem to want any company.

Tired and disappointed Taemin turned away, walking back to his motorcycle that should take him back home within the next forty minutes.

What he didn’t know about was Minho watching him through the window of his eight-story apartment, using his last bit of self-control to not call the younger male. Three empty bottles of soju by his side were proof that he wasn’t in any condition to meet Taemin. For the sake of both of them he couldn’t open the door even though it almost tore him apart to send Taemin away when he finally came around by himself.

They never talked about what happened that night, pretending as if nothing ever happened. Just one thing changed: Taemin brought up counselling almost every time they talked to each other, no matter if it was in person or through a call – sometimes even text messages. It took another week before Minho finally got an appointment. He didn’t tell Taemin about it though as he was unsure if he would be able to muster up the courage to go. Despite it originally being his idea to see a professional, actually doing it turned out to be a lot harder than anticipated - not only because of the social stigma against mental health. He didn’t want to raise the other’s hopes only to disappoint him.

Therefore, Taemin only got to know about it when they met for lunch one day near the club where the dancer was busy with the last preparations for the anniversary which would be taking place the very next week.

“I had my first counselling session today…” Minho said when they were done eating.

“Oh… How was it?” Taemin said, obviously surprised that he hadn’t known about the appointment in the first place.

“I wasn’t able to say a single thing.” Minho then admitted and shrugged. His whole expression showed how disappointed he was with himself and the younger could understand why. After such a long struggle to even call, he didn’t get anything out of it. It was exactly what he had been afraid of.

“You can always try again.” Taemin then tried to make the older feel better.

“I am not sure if I want to.”

Taemin reached for Minho’s hand, grabbing it gently before holding it in a firm grip as he spoke.

“At one point you will have to. Maybe that person just wasn’t the right one.” He never let his own gaze leave Minho’s as he kept talking. “I will help you. You are not alone.”

“Thank you.” Minho said, pulling Taemin’s hand towards his lips, placing a soft kiss on the back of it with closed eyes. It was a small gesture, but it was something he had never done before and neither of them really knew what meaning it held. The fact that they were in public, made both uncomfortable and they left the restaurant shortly, not feeling the need to stay there any longer. There were too many eyes on them, and neither could handle any kind of public attention at the moment.

Througout the following week, they didn’t meet as Taemin was busy with rehearsals and performances, his schedule getting tighter the closer the anniversary came.

Only Thursday night, which was their designated time of the week, was left for them to spend time together. It had established somehow that they met up at Kibum and Taemin’s place as a group of four. Thursday nights, the four of them would meet up, drinking together and talking about this and that, random games thrown into their routine. Partly they started meeting up to cover the sour taste Thursday evenings had, partly it developed naturally. It was strange enough that two pairs of best friends fell in love with each other – but to not do things together as four would have been even stranger.

Despite them getting closer through this time as a whole, Jinki and Kibum were still left in the dark why Minho was banned from Taemin’s room. The first time, Minho didn’t even stay over, leaving the apartment shortly past midnight to return to his own place. The others asked about it but, as per Taemins wish, they left them in the dark as to why they weren't intimate. Of course, Kibum sensed that something was off very fast despite the fact that Minho just pretended he had some things to do. But even Jinki got suspicious when the following week Minho slept on the couch instead of in Taemin’s room.

Minho regretted sleeping on the couch instead of going home instantly when he realised how thin the walls in Taemin’s apartment were. If there was one thing he definitely never wanted to hear, it was the kind of sounds and words that came from Kibum’s room. Apparently, his best friend was doing a really great job and Kibum wasn’t too shy to make it known to the world. It made Minho wonder if this happened frequently, and if yes, if Taemin heard it as well.

Judging from the early hour that Taemin got up the next morning, the second wall between them did muffle most of the sounds. It wasn’t even 8am when Taemin walked past him, waking him from his sleep.

“Morning.” Minho mumbled to tell the younger that he was awake.

“Morning.” Taemin replied, grabbing a few dishes from the refrigerator.

“Are they always this loud?”

“That was nothing.” The dancer just stated with a small smile on his lips as he heated up breakfast.

“When do you start rehearsals?” Minho walked over to the table, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes before sitting down on one of the chairs.

“Probably around 10 but I still have to prepare a few things at the studio. There will also be the last fittings for outfits as well, so we have to start early.”

Minho nodded and got up to set the table.

“When will I see you next time?” he asked while putting the bowls on the table.

Taemin turned around, leaving the soup to boil on the stove. “The anniversary is tomorrow.” He stated simply, it being answer enough.

“Yeah… but after that?” Minho didn’t settle.

“I’ll probably take Gyutae home.”

Minho frowned. At this point it felt as if Taemin spent more time with Gyutae than with him who was supposed to be the dancer’s boyfriend. It was hard enough to hear that the young boy had been chosen to dance with Taemin and Minho couldn’t help but feel jealous whenever Gyutae was brought up in a conversation.

“What about me?” Minho asked and Taemin sighed.

“I know. But I can’t just leave him alone. I am the only one he has.”

“That’s not true and you know it. First of all, he is old enough to not need supervision and second of all, from what you told me, Kim Jonghyun is taking him under his wing.” Minho said, still fighting for a little alone time with his supposed boyfriend.

“You are so complicated.” Taemin said, turning back around to stir the dishes.

“I am not. I just want some alone time with you. Is that too much to ask for?”

“I’ll see what I can do.” The dancer just answered, cutting the conversation short, only facing Minho again when the food was done heating up and they sat down to eat breakfast.

Breakfast went by in a comfortable silence and from time to time Minho could feel Taemin’s gaze on himself, he never looked up though, hoping the dancer would make the first step towards him this time. It worked. Because when it was time to do the dishes, the younger finally spoke up:

“I am sorry for not being able to be around so much. There is just so much going on at work recently I have barely had a moment to breath. I promise after this is done; I will try to properly get into this relationship.”

“Hmm.” Minho just answered as he watched the dancer pack up his things to leave for work. “Have a good day.”

“You too. I will see you tomorrow then?” Taemin asked as he grabbed the keys for his motorcycle.

“Sure. I’ll be there.”

As soon as Taemin had left the apartment, Minho sat back onto the couch, staring out of the window as he revisited what Taemin had said. What if Taemin was using his work to avoid him? If he really wanted to meet up, he would find a way. Between rehearsals, after performances, asking Jonghyun for a day off – there were so many possibilities and none of them did the younger consider. What was he afraid of? Did he regret this? Minho wasn’t sure and he couldn’t muster up the courage to ask the dancer before he left the apartment. Minho didn’t feel like leaving the place but wanted to stay even less. He was sitting on the couch, still staring out of the window as he wondered what Taemin’s real intentions were. Hoping he had said the truth when he told him that he did indeed have feelings for him as well. 

“Morning Choi.” Jinki’s voice interrupted Minho’s thoughts. The latter hadn’t moved an inch when the older opened the door of Kibum’s room.

“Morning Hyung.” Minho answered, getting up from the couch. “Is Kibum up too? I will re-heat the breakfast”

“Yes, he’ll be out soon – I hope... Has Taemin already left?”

“Yes, about twenty minutes ago. They have quite a bit of training to do still.” Minho answered, a little sadness playing in his voice while he opened a few small food containers. He really hoped he could believe Taemin’s reasons.

“Why does that sound like a lie?” Jinki said and Minho shrugged. Of course, his friend was smart enough to register his emotions.

“I don’t know, honestly. I just get the feel that he is avoiding me. We have barely seen each other since we got together and when we meet it just feels distant. I don’t know how to handle him at all.” Minho said, baring his heart for his best friend.

“hmmm…” The latter hummed as he thought about the situation. “Are you worrying about his feelings for you?”

Minho wasn’t surprised that Jinki saw right through him, saw the question behind his words. Never the less, it hurt to hear them spoken out like this.

“Yes. I guess I am. I keep trying to get close to him, but he is still behaving the way he did before we got together. I am just so confused if he even wants this. Sometimes he says he does, but his actions never seem to correspond to his words. When he tells me he wants to give his best, he stays distant and when he kisses me in incredible passion he pulls away and tells me he can’t do this. Maybe he doesn’t feel the way I feel, what if I am pressuring him into something he doesn’t want?”

“That’s where you are wrong.” Kibum’s voice interrupted his monologue. The raven-haired male was standing in the frame of his door and had obviously heard everything. “Taemin likes you a lot. So much that he is afraid of losing it if he behaves differently than before.” The latter said, Minho glued to what he said as if his life depended on it.

“Taemin doesn’t know love. He doesn’t know affection, both physically and mentally it is completely new for him. And it is a fact that work at the club is very busy these days. They even asked me to cover for a few dances lately because the original dancers are in need of more rehearsals. I can’t tell you exactly how Taemin feels but he has asked me for advice several times over the last few weeks – for the record, he rarely does that. But all I need you to do is to not give up on him so easily.”

“What did he ask you about?”

“I am pretty sure it is not my place to tell you that. I just said this to make sure you don’t take the wrong conclusions from his actions.”

On the way back to his apartment, Minho thought about Kibum’s words. Was he really thinking too much? He might be. Maybe it was just the lack of intimacy that confused him. All relationships he had previously been in were all to some extent built around the time they spent together on a physical level. In retrospect, many of these “relationships” were even solely based on sex. Was that why it was so hard for him to put trust into the feelings between them? Originally he hadn’t thought that it would become such a big issue but not being able to be physically close to who was supposed to be his boyfriend, was completely taking a toll on him.

The only thing keeping him at least partly sane was the video he had found on accident. It was the only thing he had to remember how it felt to touch the long-haired male.

Yes, he also watched a lot of porn. Yes, he jerked off a lot. Nevertheless, he craved the touch of the dancer. But he knew that it was impossible - at least for the time being. That tape of them being intimate was the closest thing he came to satisfying his need of a physical connection to Taemin.

To this day he wasn’t able to count the amount of times he had watched that video. More often than not did he also watch them dancing together. He wanted to do it again. Back then he had been so nervous, he barely remembered how it felt like to be dancing with Taemin. Now as he was watching the video, he had trouble recalling the feeling, he just guessed it must have been amazing. The way Taemin moved was breath-taking and the fact that he had been there with him, moving with him, was unbelievable.

His main interest though, stayed the part after them dancing together. It got as far as being his daily routine both before he went to bed and when he just woke up. Going to sleep without watching it was almost impossible and, in the morning, his hard length was already asking for it again.

This day was nothing different and after a whole afternoon of cleaning his apartment, he finally was able to relax. It didn’t take long until his dick was out of his pants and the familiar video was playing on his laptop. Slowly he started tugging on his length which was just starting to harden. He wasn’t in a rush and took his sweet time, knowing that in the end it would pay off. The video was playing but he didn’t really have to watch it any more. Just the sounds were enough to have his mind revisit the moment.

He rubbed the crown of his member for a while, using his own spit as lubrification until he felt precum ooze out of the small opening. It had become a habit that he used his second hand to play with his back, which explained the bottle of lube which was placed in his nightstand. Instead of massaging his balls as he used to do, more often than not did his previously lubed up fingers wander further down to gently press inside his hole. The penetration was always on cue. The moment Taemin was entering him in the video made him take a deep breath, close his eyes and insert his finger into the tight heat.

Having done this so many times, one finger was not enough anymore, and Minho inserted a second then a third one right when Taemin pulled back in the video. He was proving to himself that the next time – if there ever was one – he would be able to take Taemin, he would not give the younger a reason not to have sex with him. By now, the feeling of fingers in his ass were something he could barely work without. He pulled them out only to push back in, his forearm pressing onto his balls due to the awkward pose while his other hand was rubbing his dick.

Moans were filling the room and it wasn’t only those which came from the speaker, but Minho’s as he sped up his movements. It didn’t take long until everything got less controlled and he moved his hips almost erratically to add to the friction. Sometimes his fingers escaped his back, sometimes his penis slipped out of his hand, but it didn’t matter he was approaching his high and all his mind could think of was Taemin above him, filling him completely. His long hair tickling Minho’s chest as they didn’t bother to tie it up.

Taemin’s breathing on his face, Taemin’s balls pressing against his buttocks, his hands holding up the dancer’s weight as they were placed on Minho’s waist. It was as if he felt his touch. It felt so real but as soon as he ejaculated, white semen coating his hand that he used to cover the tip with, he was pulled back to reality.

The reality of laying in an empty bed, no warm body covering his own, the video of Taemin rejecting him playing in the background. It was always the same. Patterns repeated but for some odd reason it still felt good. At least for a few moments he was close to the man he had in his heart even if it was only in his mind.

Minho turned off the video, shutting down his laptop and went to the bathroom to clean himself up.

As he laid back in his bed a few moments later, he thought about what Kibum told him again.

“Taemin likes you a lot.”

If that was true, why couldn’t the other tell him himself? What was he so afraid of? Minho had trouble relating to the way Taemin was handling their relationship despite being able to guess the reasons for his reluctance. In a way he hated himself for loving him so much. He hated the hardships that Taemin had to go through that made him lose his trust in people, especially men who wanted to be close to him.

There were many more thoughts which kept Minho awake for hours.

Tomorrow he would see him on stage. Tomorrow he would have to share Taemin’s body with a whole room of other men. Tomorrow he will be just one of many.

At some point his thoughts turned around and he found himself falling asleep, his mind filled with the words “Taemin likes you a lot”. Then another scene: Taemin, drunk, falling into his arms, snuggling against his chest as he said the words that Minho hadn’t given too much credit due to the dancer’s boozed state: “I really, really like Choi Minho. But he can never know.”

He knew.

As good thoughts and feelings filled his mind and chest, it almost felt as if the younger was in his arms like the first night they spendt together after Taemin had reached out to finally give it a try. Taemin’s breathing on his head, his hair tickling Minho’s face, the warmth of another body engulfing him comfortably.

The dreading for the anniversary event turned into anticipation as he drifted off into a dream world where neither of them had a history. A world in which it was just the two of them, no worries, no work, no death. Them living together, them enjoying a night at the cinema, drinking together afterwards. A world he hated to leave but couldn’t stay in.

The air in the practice room was stuffy and Taemin was exhausted. Together with Jonghyun, he had spent hours looking over the dancers’ training to make sure that everything would be perfect tonight.

“Why are you so strange today?” Jonghyun asked at one point while Taemin was rehearsing his own performance together with Gyutae. The boy just nodded, agreeing to the statement.

“It’s nothing…” the long-haired male tried to avoid the question but neither Gyutae nor Jonghyun let him get away with that.

“You are never like this. What’s up? I need to know. I won’t let you go up on stage if I don’t know why you are so distracted.” Jonghyun warned and the dancer knew he couldn’t get around telling his boss about Minho.

“Someone will be in the audience tonight that makes me uncomfortable.”

Unlike Jonghyun, Gyutae looked worried.

“Ahhh. I see.” The oldest exclaimed, raising an eyebrow teasingly. “Is this about a certain Choi Minho whom you put on the guest list?”

Before Taemin could answer, Gyutae was already speaking up: “Minho? I thought you didn’t like that guy.”

“He likes him enough to break his record of not using his power to put people on the guest list.” Jonghyun said, smirking and then addressed Taemin directly: “As long as you don’t pass out on stage I don’t care. Just don’t mess this up.”

Shortly later, Jonghyun left the two on their own to take care of the last-minute preparations inside the club. Gyutae was doing a great job with the choreography and despite that they had needed to rehearse a lot more than Taemin was used to, he was still impressed to what level he was able to bring the younger. By now, he was following the steps easily and with youthful elegance that was highly appreciated, especially by Jonghyun.

“Hyung” Gyutae called out and Taemin answered with a short “hmm?” while he was stretching his back.

“What happened between you and Minho?”

“It’s complicated.” Taemin just said while bending forward to take a hold of his feet.

“But you invited him to the show. Did you get together?” Gyutae didn’t give up so easily, following Taemin’s movements as he spoke.

“Something like that…” Taemin sighed and turned around to stretch his left leg.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t think it mattered, does it?”

Gyutae didn’t say anything and the long-haired male kept moving from position to position to get his body ready for tonight.

“Don’t you trust me?”

Taemin looked up, catching Gyutae’s sad gaze.

“Don’t ever think I don’t trust or don’t value you. That has nothing to do with it.” Taemin explained and moved a little towards the younger. “It’s just that I am completely clueless in how to handle Minho and our relationship, not to even talk about making it public. I need some time to make sense of everything.”

“What do you mean by everything?” Gyutae asked, still with a sad expression on his face.

“My feelings towards him? Maybe? I don’t know.” Taemin mumbled and looked at the floor. He hated this conversation. Gyutae seemed to be more affected than he thought he would be, and that was the last thing he wanted. “Sorry for dragging you into this.”

“Don’t apologize, I was the one asking.” The younger scratched his neck before getting up. “I’ll handle myself. You handle whatever you have to handle.”

There were a few seconds of silence before Gyutae continued. “I’ll get properly dressed and put on some makeup. I will see you backstage later. And don’t worry about me, I am not a child.”

As soon as Gyutae left the studio, Taemin was left alone in the familiar space once more, and he immediately laid down on the hard floor, releasing a loud sigh as he stared at the ceiling. Of course, he knew that Gyutae wasn’t a child, he has never really been, but he hated hurting the younger anyway. Despite his indirect confession dating back over a month, Taemin still noticed the younger’s actions when they were alone together. Gyutae smiled at him a little more sweetly than at other people, he looked for his company when they were in a group and while they practiced, he found possibilities to touch him where there weren’t any originally.

Why he hadn’t told the boy about his young relationship with Minho was easy: the sheer thought of breaking Gyutae’s heart was breaking his and he just couldn’t handle seeing him sad. He had been through so much and Taemin didn’t want to be the person to add more misery to his life.

Of course, he was planning on telling him about it, but he just hadn’t been ready, and he knew Gyutae wasn’t ready either. Taemin had observed the way Gyutae was interacting with Jonghyun the past two weeks, hoping it would give Gyutae an opportunity to get over his feelings before he broke the news to him.

Originally, he had expected Jonghyun to just take care of the younger’s contract the way he had done it for him but unlike back then, they seemed so spend even more time together after everything was wrapped up.

He never commented on it but Jonghyun was looking at Gyutae with eyes similar to those he used to look at Kibum. Their short romance hadn’t lasted but Taemin knew that his boss was a very soft man who was only wearing a front to survive in this business. He wasn’t a player and from what Kibum had told him from their time together, he didn’t feel the need to intervene despite the age difference.

It was a good thing to have Jonghyun look over Gyutae. It meant he didn’t have to worry about his well-being if he wasn’t around. What happened between them was their thing and as long as Gyutae wasn’t getting hurt, Taemin wasn’t going to pull them apart.

“Yo Taem, we gotta get ready for the show” The voice of one of the dancers was pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Sure, I’ll be there in a second.” Taemin said, breathing in slowly to calm down his suddenly racing heart. Minho was going to be there tonight and he had no idea how to handle it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> Little reminder to leave a comment if you have time >< I hope this was alright. There were so many things I wanted to include so I had to cut off quite a few scenes to make it into a coherent story and not just a collection of anecdotes...  
> xx  
> R


	28. Taken by Whom?

_A/N_

_It is 00:01 here. You know what that means ;) enjoy._

_ATTENTION: THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE. IF YOU DIDN'T READ THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER DO SO NOW!_

  
_As I perviously said on[Twitter](https://twitter.com/aimrwv), the writing of this chapter was constantly accompanied by [THIS SONG](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sgn5n0SXXZ8). I decided to link it here as well in case you wanted to listen to it while reading. It really does set the mood I was going for. _

_Now, have fun with the last 7k words of this monstrosity of a fanfiction. And do consider leaving a comment(?)_

* * *

Minho arrived at the club alone, feeling slightly out of place without company. Everyone seemed to know each other and there were uncountable people waiting at the entrance to be let in. Even though Taemin had told him there would be a lot of people, he hadn’t quite expected anything close to this. Despite the cold temperature, the whole street was crowded, some waiters working from an outside bar to keep up with the visitors demands. Kim Jonghyun really did the most for this night. He even thought about the people whom he couldn’t fit into the club. 

A little unsure where he had to go, he walked over to one of the waiters. 

“Hey, sorry, I think I should be on the list. Where do I have to go to get inside?” Minho asked, scratching his neck through the black turtleneck he was wearing under a white coat. 

“I can check if you let me know who invited you. Follow me.” The waiter asked politely and gestured him to follow. 

“Uhm… Lee Taemin? He’s a dancer here…”

“Did you say Taemin put you on the list?” The waiter asked when they reached the crowded bar, sounding sceptical. 

Minho replied with a confused look before he spoke up: “Why? Is something wrong?”

The smaller male just shrugged as he reached for the list behind the bar. “He doesn’t really invite people… usually.”

“Oh… ok.” Minho said, awkwardness surrounding them despite being amongst so many people.

“I am guessing your name is Choi Minho?” 

“Yes.”

“I’ll need to check identity.” The waiter said, asking for his ID which Minho handed over shortly. 

“He put you on the list.” The waiter said, mustering him from head to toe, not even being discreet about it before giving the card back to its owner. “Can I get you something to drink? The first one is included.”

Of course, Minho wouldn’t reject a free drink and soon enough he was accompanied to the entrance, getting into the exclusive part of the anniversary, holding a glass of gin tonic in his hand. 

The moment the heavy door closed behind him, he was surrounded by hot air, looking for a spot to sit down and take off his coat. He didn’t have to look far because Jinki was walking towards him, Kibum by his side. 

“Choi! You came!” his friend called out and Minho walked closer. 

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I?”

“Point made.” Jinki said, pulling his friend towards their seats on the left side of the stage. 

For a second, Minho was surprised at the quality seats, before he remembered that they had connections. Both through Kibum and Taemin. From what he knew, Jonghyun wouldn’t leave Kibum without a decent seat. 

It was shortly before midnight, so there weren’t any performances on stage yet. Instead, it left a lot of time to drink and talk to his best friend. Kibum, who usually had a lot to say barely took part in their conversation, sitting by Jinki’s side with his legs crossed, almost looking a little feverish. 

“Are you alright?” Minho asked when, at one point, the raven-haired male closed his eyes. “Do you want to go home? You don’t look too well.” 

Instead of getting an answer from Kibum, it was Jinki again who spoke up, reassuring Minho that his boyfriend was – in fact – just tired from the week. 

“Whatever you say Lee… Just let him sleep tonight.” 

“I can’t promise that.” Jinki smirked and Minho hit him. 

“Hyung! What happened to you?” 

Jinki was saved by Jonghyun getting on stage, announcing that the first performers will be on stage soon. He said a few more words, celebrating the 10 years of existence but then made space for a group of four dancers who immediately took their positions. 

There were several very good performances, by groups as well as solo acts but all Minho could think of was when Taemin would finally come on. The latter hadn’t told him anything, his anticipation heightening by the lack of knowledge. Despite waiting for Taemin to get on stage, he couldn’t help but get turned on by the men currently on stage. 

Jonghyun definitely chose his dancers well. They were incredibly gorgeous. Sensual but not cheap. It was an amazing mixture and from time to time Minho could even sit back and enjoy the show, shortly forgetting that Taemin would be in the same position not much later. For some reason he was incredibly nervous, despite it not being him who was going to be dancing in front of such an audience. Minho knew it was ridiculous because Taemin actually seemed to enjoy the attention he was getting. 

From time to time he glanced over to Jinki and Kibum who didn’t seem to care much about the dancers on stage – being mostly focused on themselves. Thinking back, Minho realised that this was the place the two got to know each other. He remembered hating Jinki for bringing him to a gay club originally - but then again now, Minho was glad they went. He was glad he didn’t drag the older out of there as soon as he realised where he was. Not for Taemin and him, but mostly because it was the crucial point for Kibum and Jinki’s meeting. 

Despite Jinki being less available than before, Minho was more than happy for his best friend. Throughout all the time they had known each other, while Minho had girlfriend after girlfriend, Jinki never got into relationships. Now that he had Kibum, he seemed happier, as if he left some parts of his past behind and was able to enjoy what life was giving him again. And enjoying, he was. So much that Minho almost felt out of place, sitting close to them while Jinki’s hand was dangerously close to Kibum’s crotch. 

He suddenly wished Taemin was with him - though, it probably would be way worse if he was. The performances were riling him up and despite still being moderately chill, he could already imagine how hard it would be to watch Taemin dance half naked on stage. He hadn’t seen a glimpse of Taemin’s body despite them being – at least somehow - together. Minho respected Taemin’s wishes but the sheer thought of seeing the dancer’s legs, setting his eyes on Taemin’s bare chest was almost too much for him. If he wasn’t completely hard by then, he surely would be the moment the younger stepped on stage. 

During the next two performances, Minho mostly watched the floor, emptying his drink, not daring to stand up to get a new one. He knew that he would never forgive himself when he missed even a second of Taemin’s performance. It was the first and probably last grey zone where Minho could fully enjoy the more sexual side of the younger. He would need to imprint it into his mind so he would be able to continue to respect Taemin’s decision without going insane. 

As expected, Minho’s mood changed the very second that Taemin entered the stage. It had been a while since he had last seen the dancer in his element, and the costume he was wearing awakened the deep desires he had suppressed the last months as if they had never been dormant. His posture was perfect, none of the insecurities Minho knew about visible in his walk or his facial expression. It seemed as if the worries the long-haired male carried around every single day disappeared from his appearance completely. Taemin looked beautiful. So beautiful Minho could not take his eyes off him. So beautiful it felt wasteful to blink. 

Taemin was wearing white shorts and a see-through white fabric shirt, which, even though it didn’t hide anything from the numerous eyes fixed on his body, created just a little space. A little membrane that, at least physically, separated Taemin’s bare chest from the spectators in the room.

The moment the music started playing, Minho’s heart dropped. It was the song they had danced to together. It was the choreography that he had watched uncountable times. Adrenaline started rushing through his veins when Gyutae entered the stage and took the role he had taken, standing on the opposite side of the stage, wearing the same outfit as Taemin, just that he was wearing black and his shorts were slightly longer. 

It was strange seeing Taemin walk towards the boy with seductive steps. It was supposed to be him. Not Gyutae. It was his part. Instead of Taemin’s hands grabbing the younger’s styled hair, it should be soft digits in Minho’s black locks. Instead of Gyutae’s small hands traveling along Taemin’s arms, it was supposed to be his big ones. 

There had been several adjustments to the choreography since the day they had danced it together and to Minho the alteration looked wrong. He was balling his hands in fists when he watched the two dancers hug each other while turning gracefully and sliding on the floor. It felt so familiar yet so foreign and there was so much more to come. 

The song’s pace slowly picked up and Minho’s blood was rushing through his body, raising his heartbeat until he could feel it up to his neck.

Taemin was grinding his body against the floor and Minho knew that Gyutae must be doing the same but his eyes wouldn’t register the second dancer on stage. His eyes were on Taemin, and Taemin only. He was captivating, entrancing him in a way that was almost frightening. The long-haired male was turning on the floor as if it was the most natural thing to do, showing off his legs in a way that made Minho’s insides crawl. 

It was impossible to not stare at him and when his eyes fell on the slight bump underneath the tight white shorts, Minho was suddenly painfully aware of how exposed Taemin was. Everyone currently in the club was watching him, how he rubbed himself as he leaned back on his knees until his back almost touched the floor. Numerous men followed Taemin’s example, their hands placed on their crotch, doing god knows what. 

In Minho’s mind, everything was blending together; the adrenaline, the amazement, the adoration as well as the desire he felt for the dancer on stage. But one feeling was slowly overshadowing all the others: Anger. 

He hated the way people were looking at Taemin as if they owned him. It disgusted him and yet he knew it was exactly what he desired himself. He wanted to have the dancer all to himself. He wasn’t better than any of the other men in this room who were thirsting after spending just one night with the gorgeous man on stage. 

But wasn’t it different? They had a different relationship. He wasn’t just a random man in the audience. He had spent evenings just sitting next to him, talking about whatever came to their mind. Minho was the one Taemin fled to when his life was crumbling down. It was the two of them sitting by the shore in the deepest winter, sharing a blanket to stay warm as the cold wind was blowing around them. 

It was different. Taemin wanted to be with him. Taemin wanted him in his life. Taemin had wanted him to see this performance. 

Minho’s legs suddenly started moving. It wasn’t a conscious decision. He just stood up and started walking, his fast steps silenced by the vibrations of the bass. The calls from Jinki, he didn’t even hear. 

When he reached the stage, he didn’t stop. Every last string of rationality was screaming at him, trying to stop him from doing what his heart had already decided on. It only needed one huge step and he climbed onto the red stage and stood face to face with the man he had lost his heart to. 

The expression on Taemin’s face was unreadable. There were so many emotions in his eyes at once that the face couldn’t keep up. In that very moment, Minho couldn’t see anything but Lee Taemin. He couldn’t see Gyutae looking at him with a puzzled expression, he couldn’t see Jonghyun holding back the security that had been on their way to get him off the stage. He couldn’t see Jinki’s wide eyes and Kibum who watched with a sceptical expression. All he heard was his own heartbeat pulsing in his ear, perfectly aligning with the vibrations he felt through the stage – unable to register the uproar in the audience. 

He saw Taemin’s face change back to his professional mask, a small smirk playing around his lips as he held out a shaking hand for Minho to take. 

Minho took it and Taemin pulled him forward, pressing his barely covered body against the taller’s. He used his hand to pull Minho’s head closer until his lips were close to the taller’s ear.

“Follow my lead.” Taemin said, hiding behind Minho’s head. 

The latter didn’t have time to think because the very next second, Taemin had spun around, his arm curling around Minho’s neck as he slowly moved his hips with the beat. It took a few measures until Minho’s body was able to move, remembering the movements he hadn’t done for weeks, only still remembering them because of the video that had been taken. 

He recognised patterns and tried to keep up with Taemin’s gorgeous movements, not managing to even come close to succeeding. Soon enough, Taemin moved away, running towards the other end of the stage only to turn around again. Minho knew that he was supposed to follow his lead, dance it mirrored but all he could do was stand there and stare at Taemin’s muscles working underneath the white see-through fabric that wasn’t leaving anything to one’s imagination. 

When Taemin’s fingers were slowly traveling his own neck and the dancer’s eyes captured Minho’s gaze, the latter knew what was coming. He remembered this, Taemin nodded at him, reassuring him. As if someone was controlling him, he took a few steps towards Taemin, dropping on his knees, only to lie down onto the red floor. 

He couldn’t see Taemin anymore as the bass shook his whole body, vibrations traveling through his bones as he waited for the dancer to come over. It didn’t take long until hands were placed next to his face and he once more locked eyes with the gorgeous man who was now above him. Slowly but steadily, the latter brought his lower body down until their crotches touched. 

It wasn’t longer than a few seconds, but it felt like hours. Minho’s mind went back to the day at the studio, how they were making out on the floor. It felt so distant, yet so real and it seemed it wasn’t only him who remembered because instead of moving away, Taemin got closer; closer until he placed his full lips on Minho’s warm ones. 

The howling from the audience wasn’t registered by either of them and the taller melted beneath the dancer’s body, completely forgetting the fact they were in public. Taemin on the other hand though seemed to be able to regain his senses fast as he didn’t take long until he moved away again, his hips rolling with the music. 

Minho’s brain didn’t process much after their kiss. It was almost an out of body experience when he felt himself stand up and follow some of Taemin’s movements. When the music stopped, he felt Taemin’s hand taking his, making him bow just before he was pulled towards the back of the stage where darkness awaited him. After the blinding light on stage, his eyes took a while to adjust and he let himself be guided by the younger who knew exactly where he was going. 

There were a few people who tried to talk to Taemin, but the latter just kept walking, pulling Minho with him until they reached the small courtyard with the bench that was completely surrounded by concrete walls. Completely out of breath, Taemin sat down, wearing nothing but his stage outfit despite the freezing temperatures. 

“Why did you do this?” Taemin asked pulling out a cigarette from the tin box that was hidden underneath the bench. Minho didn’t say anything. He didn’t have an answer. It just happened and he knew Taemin wouldn’t be satisfied with anything that he could possibly say. In addition, his mind was still fuzzy in the after effects of the kiss. The latter seemed to interpret Minho’s silence correctly because instead of asking again he held out the box. 

“You want one?” He asked and the taller took one with a thankful nod. 

“Not very talkative tonight?” Taemin said while lighting the cigarette between his lips, turning his words into mumbles. 

“There is nothing to say…” Minho answered holding out his hand to receive the lighter. He was confused that the dancer didn't bring up the kiss. After all it has been the first time their lips touched after the last time when Taemin broke down crying afterwards. Instead of addressing the issue on hand, the long-haired male chose an easier topic.

“You remembered the choreography.”

“Not really.” Minho answered, inhaling for the first time, the nicotine immediately calming him down. 

“Lighter.” Taemin said holding out his hand and was handed the object of interest a few seconds after. The tin box was sealed closed again, placed on its designated spot before Taemin continued talking while exhaling smoke into the cold air. 

“Can I stay over tonight?”

Minho’s eyes widened. Despite being tipsy, he surely wasn’t drunk enough to make up such scenarios.

“Stay over as in having sex?” he said, eyebrows raised high in disbelief. Taemin didn’t answer immediately. Instead he kept smoking, pulling on his cigarette hard. He held his breath for what felt like an eternity before throwing his head back to finally let the smoke escape through his full lips, blowing the white cloud into the night air.

“Just staying over.” Taemin replied, pulling his naked legs up, holding onto them as he brought the cigarette back to his lips. 

“Aren’t you cold?” Minho asked, taking a seat next to the dancer who shrugged.

“A little. But I’ll be done soon anyway.” The dancer answered and held up his cigarette in demonstration, Minho looking at it in surprise. The younger was usually a fast smoker, but this time he was even further ahead of him than normally. 

“You look good in that.” Minho said pointing at Taemin’s outfit. 

“You think? Wanna wear it?” The dancer smirked, pulling at his shorts’ hem to illustrate how tight the fabric was hugging his body. 

“I like it when you are wearing it.” 

“I can wear it for you one day if you want.” Taemin said and Minho knew that right in that moment, there was nothing he wished for more than to have him for himself, in this outfit.

“You can’t take back that offer.” 

Taemin shrugged again, as if it was the easiest promise to fulfil and threw his cigarette to the floor, stepping on it before picking it up and throwing it away. 

“Wait for me in the back in half an hour. I’ll take us to your place.” Taemin said, walking back into the club without another word, where he probably headed to the dressing rooms – the one place Minho couldn’t follow him to. 

The air was icy cold while Minho waited near the exit at the back of the club, being inside of the club turned out to be highly uncomfortable so all he did was grab his jacked, letting Jinki and Kibum know he was leaving. Those two didn’t say anything despite their eyes clearly implying that they had many questions.

Outside, even though he barely looked up from his phone, he felt the stares. The looks were hard to ignore and despite the fact that he wasn’t standing by the main entrance, there were quite a few men who had seen the show walking past him. Many things were said, and Minho didn’t know which ones were said for him to hear and which ones were just a random conversation between drunk people. 

“Isn’t that the guy who was on stage with Taemin?”

“I have never seen anyone being kissed on that stage, who’s that dude?”

“The show tonight definitely was something different. I am surprised Jonghyun didn’t send security up there.”

“I would have given everything to put my lips onto that stripper’s body.”

The thirty minutes Taemin had talked about turned into almost an hour and by the time the dancer finally came outside, Minho’s hands were almost frozen. 

“30 minutes you said.” 

“Sorry, I had some explaining to do.” Taemin spoke, as Minho walked towards him. “Why didn’t you wait inside?”

“Do you really think I can ever go into this place again? Judging from what some said, people weren’t exactly pleased that we kissed on stage.”

Taemin nodded knowingly and added: “Well that’s not all too bad. You are not invited to come back anyway. Jonghyun wasn’t too big of a fan of your stunt either.”

“Did you get into trouble?” Minho asked while they were walking towards Taemin’s motorcycle. 

“Jonghyun would have had you thrown out of the club before you took your first step onto the stage if he really cared.” Minho seemed to have a puzzled look on his face because shortly, Taemin elaborated. “To answer your question: No, I did not get into trouble. BUT I have been asked to keep you out of there if you are going to jump on stage unannounced.”

“Fair enough.” 

The ride back to Minho’s apartment was comfortable, almost familiar. The taller loved the feeling of hugging Taemin’s lean body while the vibrations of the motor were pulsing through his own, the cold wind making his nose water despite the helmet he was wearing. The world around them mixed together into colourful lines, only what was in front of them visible to the eye.

When they arrived at Minho’s apartment building, it was way past midnight and a comfortable silence surrounded them as they took off their shoes, placing them in the designated spot near the entrance. Minho was the first to walk in not bothering to take off his coat, closely followed by Taemin who hung his jacket. 

“Do you want some tea?” Minho asked and Taemin raised an eyebrow. This wasn’t what he had expected to hear. 

“You’re not even offering Soju? Did anyone ever tell you that you are actually quite domestic?” the dancer asked instead of answering the question. 

Minho shrugged and walked towards the kitchen to prepare drinks. “I have Soju too. Do you want some?”

“Why did you get up on stage tonight?” Taemin ignored the whole drink issue completely and got straight to the point he had tried to bring up earlier.

“Tea it is.” Minho answered his own question, ignoring Taemin’s. 

“I asked something.” Taemin mouthed and Minho who was setting up a kettle turned around.

“So did I.”

“Tea is fine. I might just jump at you if I were drunk.” The dancer admitted a lot more casual than it should be, pulling his hair into a ponytail. “Now answer mine. Why did you get up on stage?”

“Why? I thought you didn’t get into trouble.” Minho asked as he pressed the button to turn on the kettle which immediately filled the room with the soft sound of it heating up. He knew that asking a follow-up question about Taemin's disclosure might as well end in HIM jumping the younger so he kept it back, only paying attention to the second part.

“Yeah I didn’t. I just want to know.”

Minho turned around, leaning against the counter, watching as Taemin came closer. 

“You know why I did it.” He said as his heart sped up.

Taemin came closer.

“I do. But I want to hear you say it.” 

Taemin came closer. 

His gaze was fixed on Minho’s eyes, holding eye contact for several seconds before he was too close to keep the other in focus. His face turned to the side and he whispered into the taller’s ear. 

“Say it.” Taemin’s voice was raspy, probably from smoking too much, but still soft enough to make shivers run down Minho’s spine. The taller could feel Taemin’s breathing against his neck and he knew waiting for the dancer to pull away was pointless. 

There were many things that had made him join Taemin on stage. Many of which he couldn’t quite explain – lead by the uncomfortable feeling of seeing the younger dance in front of horny men, none of them knowing that the gorgeous man belonged to him. It was the jealousy; It was the desire to be in Gyutae’s place. It was the fear of losing Taemin. It was the hatred for each and every man who had their hands placed on their crotch. It was the love he had for the dancer that almost filled his heart completely.

“I l…” Minho tried but failed to produce more words. The one thing he wanted to say, he couldn’t utter. He would not be able to take it back. He knew Taemin would run. 

So, he kept it to himself. Instead, he said something he didn’t mean, something that wasn’t the whole truth, the thing Taemin expected him to say. 

“I needed to show them you are taken.” Minho said, expecting Taemin to pull back now that he had his answer. But he didn’t. 

“Taken by whom?” He whispered instead, his lips placing a small peck beneath Minho’s ear.

“Me.” The taller said as if it was the most natural thing in the world. 

“hmmm” Taemin moaned and then Minho felt the dancer’s tongue poke out through his soft lips, licking the place he had kissed earlier.

“Taemin.” Minho said and Taemin’s tongue moved down further, sensually licking the spot where Minho’s muscular shoulder met his neck. 

“Taemin.” Minho repeated, his hands pressing against the dancer’s chest. “Taemin, you have to stop.” He said with more force, pushing him away. 

“Don’t do this. I won’t be able to hold back.” Minho said and Taemin looked at him through fierce eyes. It was as if he was back in his stage persona, teasing the taller with every action he took. 

“Try to.” Taemin said with a smirk, closing the space between their lips for the second time this evening. 

Minho had to hold onto the other’s lean body to keep himself upright. This was everything he ever wanted but it wasn’t what should be happening. It wasn’t what Taemin wanted despite the latter being the one initiating it. The dancer was unpredictable, and Minho just couldn’t take the risk of him leaving again, closing himself off again. He had to get away in time before it was too late to get a grip on his last bit of reason.

For a few more seconds, Minho melted into the kiss, unable to break free from the spell Taemin put upon him. Unable to let go of the incredible feeling of embracing the person he treasured so much. 

It was the boiling water that pulled him back into reality, making Minho place his hands on Taemin’s eager face that tried to keep sucking on his lips. Gently he pushed the dancer away, turning his head towards the kettle which had just turned itself off. 

“The water is ready. You can wait on the bed.” Minho said, his voice raspy and trembling while he got away from Taemin, finally able to breathe again. He didn’t look back at the dancer because he knew that he couldn’t resist him if he did. Every fibre of his body was telling him to get back into his arms. The desire to be with him was too strong he could barely keep himself together. 

Minho heard Taemin’s light steps traveling towards his bed while he opened two bags of wheat-tea. He could have had the tea ready within a few seconds, but the sheer thought of facing the other male again so fast made him carefully peel the bags out of the paper-wrapping, placing them into a cup slowly, and adding the water in almost drop by drop. He even waited a few minutes to take out the bags, placing them into the sink before taking a few deep breaths and turning around. 

Two cups of tea in his hands he walked to the matrass on the floor that still hadn’t been placed on a proper bed. Taemin was sitting on it, eyes closed, and his head leant back against the white wall, creating a beautiful image of the dancer in his most vulnerable state. A state he didn’t show to many. 

The long-haired male only opened his eyes when he felt the movement of the matrass as it shifted underneath Minho’s weight. Without a word, he took the cup the taller was holding out for him to take. 

“I am sorry.” Taemin said shortly after taking the first sip of the hot liquid.

“Don’t apologize. It’s not as if I didn’t like it.” Minho said, placing his hand on Taemin’s thigh. 

“I am not sorry for what I did, I am sorry that you had to cut it short.” He continued, now with his head turned towards the older. “I am sorry for being the mess I am.” Taemin’s gaze lowered back onto his hands, head hung low. “I really want to give you what you deserve. It makes no sense that you are with me.”

Minho’s hand tightened it's grip on Taemin’s thigh as he spoke a few seconds later: “You don’t have to get it. It’s enough if you accept it as a fact.”

“Easier said than done.” The dancer mumbled with a sad undertone and sipped on his tea that was already at drinking temperature because Minho took so long to get it ready. 

“I think we both think too much.” Minho admitted, stretching out his legs. 

Taemin had to agree. “I guess...”

There was another minute of silence while both were thinking about what to say next. It was Taemin who spoke up once more. 

“I really want this to work. Sorry for taking advantage of the situation. I am not used to taking it slow.”

“I noticed.” Minho said sipping on his warm tea. “Me neither.”

“But we are doing quite alright for now. Don’t you think?” 

“I don’t know about you, but I am barely holding on.” Minho admitted, thinking back to the uncountable minutes he spent masturbating to their sex-tape.

“Thank you.” 

“For what?” 

Taemin took a short break as if he needed to muster up courage. “Just because.” 

Despite the alcohol in his system, it was obvious to Minho that this wasn’t what Taemin had originally wanted to say. He didn’t want to pressure Taemin any further and decided to leave the topic aside. 

“You are welcome” He said instead of asking for the real reason. 

“Do you mind me taking a shower?” Taemin asked a few minutes later, Minho nodding in affirmation. 

“My place is your place. Take what you need.” The latter answered, nodding towards his closet.

With a soft “Thanks” the dancer stood up from the matrass, walking over to Minho’s closet, grabbing himself a fresh pair of Minho’s briefs before walking over to the bathroom. 

It was the first time that Taemin took a shower at Minho’s. The two times he had stayed over, it hadn’t been after work so he hadn’t had a reason to. He usually tried to avoid Minho’s bathroom, for one simple reason: the full-length body mirror placed on the empty wall, visible from wherever he stood in the room. He despised it. Despite many things getting easier since he was with Minho, one thing was just as hard as before: Looking at himself. 

There was just one thing he thought about when he saw himself naked in a mirror. It took him back to hours of himself cleaning his body after a session. Getting rid of lube and bodily fluids that belonged to faceless men. It reminded him of uncountable nights where his body was the only thing he could count on for survival. Despite knowing it wasn’t healthy, he was unable to turn off the immediate flashbacks that clouded his mind when he saw himself in a mirror. He couldn’t remember a time where he didn’t see his body as an object, something detached from himself, used and dirty. 

Heart pumping, Taemin closed his eyes as soon as he had stepped into the shower, turning the water that immediately surrounded him – still icy cold. It didn’t matter because he was finally able to let go. In the only place where they wouldn’t be visible, he let tears fill his eyes as the sound of water meeting the floor disguised his sobs from Minho’s ears. 

Taemin had no idea why he met Minho. He had no idea why the latter hadn’t given up on him. It made no sense for the latter to be with him but despite knowing that it was completely irrational that Minho had feelings for him, he never wanted it to change. It was selfish but he needed him by his side. If he messed this up, Taemin knew that he wouldn’t ever be able to forgive himself. He had lost so much, and Minho was the first person after Kibum who was with him of their own accord. He couldn’t lose him. If he did, he wasn’t sure if he would be able to put himself back together. 

It was strange how he had grown so attached to a person. It was the dumbest thing to do and he knew it. So why did he let it come this far? Why did he let Minho into his heart? Taemin didn’t know. He just knew he needed him. It was Minho’s arms that gave him back just the tiniest bit of self-worth. When they were together, he could forget all the comments that had been made about his body. In Minho’s arms, he felt safe. He felt like a person that deserved love. Those moments were fleeting though and the moment the taller let go of him, thoughts came back, torturing his mind anew.

Taemin’s hands moved to the thin scars on his hips, pressing his fingernails into the sensitive skin. It helped him calm down. It was the kind of pain he could control. His tears stopped and he was finally able to properly wash himself, the smell of Minho’s shower-gel filling his nostrils, relaxing him with every breath he took. 

When he finally exited the bathroom, smelling just like the older male and wearing the other’s slightly too big briefs, Minho had fallen asleep. Taemin put his own clothes on one of the chairs before walking closer to the sleeping male. He was curled up facing the wall, still wearing the turtleneck and black pants he had been wearing for the night. 

Taemin was unsure if he should wake the older male so he could change into something more comfortable but decided against it a few seconds later. The moment he saw Minho’s comfortable face, he knew he couldn’t do it. Instead, he turned off the light and took the blanket out of the small box by the wall, laying down next to him. With gentle hands, he spread the blanket over them, trying to get all of Minho covered with it. A task that was surprisingly hard, the reason for that being Minho’s impressive overall body size. 

“Hmmm” Minho moaned when Taemin was just pulling the blanket up to the taller’s shoulder. “did you finish your shower?” the sleepy male mumbled.

“Yes. You can keep sleeping.” 

Minho turned around, now facing Taemin whose face was mere inches from his.

“I don’t really want to sleep.” 

Taemin didn’t answer. 

“You’re not gonna ask me why?”

“It is pretty obvious, isn’t it?” Taemin gave back. “Now that you are awake, you should change into something more comfortable.”

Minho chuckled a little before sitting up. “Want me to be comfortable? I see.”

Without another word, he removed his turtleneck, leaving his upper body completely bare. Taemin couldn’t help but look, only regaining control of his eyes a few second into staring at Minho’s gorgeous torso. The little light that came through the window was enough to vaguely percept how well he was shaped.

“You can look. I don’t mind.” The older said while opening the button of his black dress pants. 

Just a few seconds later, the pants had been removed successfully and Minho laid back down to face Taemin once more. 

“Can I kiss you?” Taemin whispered, his eyes fixed on the taller’s lips. 

“I would like that. Very much." Minho whispered back and placed his right hand on Taemin’s left cheek as he let Taemin close the gap between them once more. 

The younger’s hand naturally placed itself on Minho’s side, caressing the hot skin gently while their lips stayed still. It was Taemin who started moving, the other immediately following his example by gently opening his lips to offer himself to him. 

It wasn’t about the kiss though. The kiss just accompanied them exploring each other’s bodies. Barely any attention was put into it as their minds were occupied with the gentle touches they shared. Minho’s rough hands were drawing circles on Taemin’s back while the latter’s hand was gently caressing the taller’s biceps. Their bodies were looking for warmth and it didn’t take long until their naked torsos were pressed against each other, hips still unnaturally far apart. 

Taemin was the first to press his crotch forward, Minho hissing into the slow kiss, knowing Taemin would be able to feel how excited he was. 

“Don’t be shy.” The dancer mumbled against his lips and Minho could feel them pulling into a smirk. He didn’t say anything but instead stopped Taemin from talking by licking inside the younger’s mouth. 

"Are you sure this is ok?" Minho uttered, breaking free from the kiss for a second. 

"Yes. This feels good." Taemin mumbled against his lips before pulling away, looking at the older male in the dark. He wasn't able to make out much but the gesture reassured Minho that this was - in fact - alright.

Their movements were slow as there was no reason to rush. Minho’s hand was now placed on Taemin’s waist, squeezing the other’s soft flesh gently. He had been dreaming of holding him like this again and now that he was actually with him, it didn’t feel real. The way Taemin’s hands were playing with his hair, tickling the sensitive spots behind his ear, the way Taemin’s legs were wrapping themselves around his was too good to be true. 

After several more minutes, their movements naturally grew softer and slower until they were only holding each other, Minho’s head buried in Taemin’s nape as he breathed in Taemin’s distinct scent that was mixed with his own fragrance. It smelled ethereal. 

Neither of them was left unaffected by the past twenty minutes, the lengths between their legs begging for attention. Strangely enough though, neither felt the desire to get rid of the pressure that was numbed by a warm feeling in their chests. 

“We should do this again sometime.” Minho said, laying on his back, Taemin following his example. 

“mhh” Taemin answered an affirmative while looking at the ceiling unable to make out anything due to the darkness.

There was a long silence while Minho’s hand reached for Taemin’s, digits intertwining. Neither of them dared to move, afraid of breaking the vulnerable moment. Their breathing calmed and the pressure in their lower regions started to fade slowly.

Minho’s mind was running in circles, trying to calm down his beating heart. Taemin’s thumb was moving ever so slightly, caressing the back of his hand gently. They were together. After all this time they made it to this point. How it happened was a mystery to Minho. Their relationship was still so fresh, so weak. It suddenly hit him how vulnerable it was. Neither of them was stable on their own. Both carried their past with them, pasts that couldn’t be more different while their hearts suffered from similar pain. The pain of feeling alone. Not belonging anywhere. 

He had no idea what kind of things Taemin carried with him every single day, but he knew he would do whatever it takes to support him through it. His own issues were simpler. Less complicated but no less painful and he knew that Taemin was aware. One day, he hoped that the younger would let him in completely. He wanted to understand. 

For now, it didn’t matter. He couldn’t think of any place he would rather be than on a hard matrass in the dark, holding hands with the man he loved.

“Taemin?” he said, breaking the silence. 

“hmmm” the other replied, half asleep.

“I l…” Minho started, but once again he couldn’t say it. Once again, he was a coward. Once again, he was too afraid of Taemin’s reaction.

“mmh?”

“Never mind…”

“mhm”

Minho felt Taemin’s hand relax, the grip on his hand opening as the dancer fell asleep next to him. Now that Taemin’s grip weakened, he took an even tighter hold on the younger’s small hands. He wouldn’t let go of his hand. He wasn’t yet ready to say it aloud but that didn’t make it any less true.

Maybe one day he would be able to tell him. Maybe one day he could say it without the fear that Taemin would run away. 

One day, he could finally voice what his heart was screaming at him. 

One day.

* * *

  
If you want to read more of my fics: [MASTERLIST](https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1431224/aimrwv-masterlist-2-0)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> IT'S OVER. IT IS COMPLETE! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT I ACTUALLY FINISHED THIS STORY?! BECAUSE I CAN'T
> 
> I know this took too long. I know I - at least partly - let you down with this story. I am guessing that only a small amount of people stayed till the end so I wanted to thank you for finishing it. I don't take that for granted.  
> For me personally this was probably the biggest challenge I have faced writing a story. I can truthfully say that I am proud of finishing this. I hope the incredible amount time invested in these last chapters payed off.
> 
> There are a few people I am especially thankful for. People that I wouldn't have made it without! You know who you are. I love you lots. (This is also also directed at those who kept re-reading older chapters and even left comments!!! You have no idea what that did for me!)
> 
> So, if you have a minute I would give anything to see you in the comments! If not, a simple upvote would really show me that all these tears and all this sweat weren't in vain.
> 
> Thank you for reading, thank you for not forgetting about this story, thank you for supporting me until the end.
> 
> xx
> 
> R


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